Empathy vs sympathy

[RainbowsButterflies]

Can anyone enlighten me as to the difference between empathy and sympathy. Every time I think I understand, someone says something to make me question myself again.

 

My understanding was that empathy had to do with figuring out how someone was feeling, wheras sympathy was understanding that feeling e.g. if you see someone crying you use empathy to work out that they are upset, and sympathy to understand what that feels like, or to understand why if they tell you what has upset them. Or am I just complicating things?

[pola y dobie]

Can anyone enlighten me as to the difference between empathy and sympathy. Every time I think I understand, someone says something to make me question myself again.

 

My understanding was that empathy had to do with figuring out how someone was feeling, wheras sympathy was understanding that feeling e.g. if you see someone crying you use empathy to work out that they are upset, and sympathy to understand what that feels like, or to understand why if they tell you what has upset them. Or am I just complicating things?

<'> Hello!! Ok I'll try to explain it for you....when someone tells you that his goldfish died, you may sympathise. You imagine how the person must be feeling. If say, your own goldfish was no longer alive, then you can 'empathise' saying ' well I know how you must feel, as I went through that myself'. However, knowing how other people 'feel' can be quite difficult for people with AS.

 

The ability to see something from a friend's perspective to imagine how they must feel in a particular situation is called ' theory of mind'. Persons with AS show difficulty with things that involve theory of mind, which means that social interaction is hard and sociable behaviour is unpredictable ( dobie always says to me, imagine not being able to how how a person feels, then trying to say something right to them!).

Hope this helps!!

POLA xx

[Tally]

Empathy is being able to understand how another person may be feeling. So if you hear that a friend has suffered a berievement, then you use empathy to work out that your friend must be feeling sad. You might also use empathy to work out how someone is feeling from non-verbal communication, including facial expression, body language and behavioural changes.

 

Sympathy is something you express to someone else. So you might tell a berieved friend you are sorry for their loss or hug them. If someone looks sad you might ask them if they are OK.

 

You need to do the empathy before you can do the sympathy, because you cannot offer sympathy unless you have already worked out a person is upset.

[bid]

Empathy is being able to understand how another person may be feeling. So if you hear that a friend has suffered a berievement, then you use empathy to work out that your friend must be feeling sad. You might also use empathy to work out how someone is feeling from non-verbal communication, including facial expression, body language and behavioural changes.

 

Sympathy is something you express to someone else. So you might tell a berieved friend you are sorry for their loss or hug them. If someone looks sad you might ask them if they are OK.

 

You need to do the empathy before you can do the sympathy, because you cannot offer sympathy unless you have already worked out a person is upset.

 

Tally...that's the best explanation I think I've seen!

 

Bid

[Kazzen161]

I would say that sympathy is given when you know/can see someone is upset eg: because they are crying or because they tell you they are.

 

Whereas empathy is where you can put yourself in their shoes and almost feel their sorrow/pain yourself.

 

So I would say that you can sympathise without empathising.

[trekster]

Empathy is being able to understand how another person may be feeling. So if you hear that a friend has suffered a bereavement, then you use empathy to work out that your friend must be feeling sad. You might also use empathy to work out how someone is feeling from non-verbal communication, including facial expression, body language and behavioural changes.

 

Sympathy is something you express to someone else. So you might tell a bereaved friend you are sorry for their loss or hug them. If someone looks sad you might ask them if they are OK.

 

You need to do the empathy before you can do the sympathy, because you cannot offer sympathy unless you have already worked out a person is upset.

 

ive been better at sympathy than empathy but i prefer to use empathy as sympathy tends to get the person feeling worse about themselves.

[Tally]

I would say that sympathy is given when you know/can see someone is upset eg: because they are crying or because they tell you they are.

 

Whereas empathy is where you can put yourself in their shoes and almost feel their sorrow/pain yourself.

 

So I would say that you can sympathise without empathising.

 

But it takes empathy to work out that crying = upset, or that "I feel upset" = "I want you to comfort me." It's very basic empathy, the type that many autistic people can manage, but I still think it counts as empathy.

[Kazzen161]

I am not sure that that is empathy.

 

"Empathy is the ability to not only detect what others feel but also to experience that emotion yourself....Empathy and sympathy are very close and are sometimes used as synonyms. The easiest way to separate them is to remember that empathy is about feelings whilst sympathy is about actions."

 

or as http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-the-difference-between-sympathy-and-empathy.htm puts it, sympathy is where you feel for someone and empathy is where you feel with someone.

[KezT]

sympathy is where you feel for someone and empathy is where you feel with someone

I like that one:)

 

Empathy is when you put yourself in the other person's shoes and feel what they are feeling. So if their parent has just died, you imagine what it would be like if your own parent died, and feel the emotion that brings with them.

 

Sympathy is when you understand what another person is going through and that it is difficult for them, but don't experience their emotion yourself. Sympathy is an emotion itself.

[bid]

Oh lord, I give up!!

 

Bid

[baddad]

Hi -

 

There was a longish thread running on this a while back...

My own opinion is that 'empathy' is a very flawed - or at the very least extremely misunderstood - concept, and that preconceptions that autistic people 'don't do' empathy arise largely from interpretation rather than fact. Similarly, the preconception that neurotypical people 'do do' empathy arises more from modelled and often false social etiquettes. To paraphrase Temple Grandin it's more a case of 'different, not less'. That said, different autistic people will have different degrees of what might be called 'empathy' (for want of a better word) in exactly the same way as the rest of the population, and that will be influenced by all sorts of variables like nature/nurture/social influences/background/conceptual development regarding (i.e.) theory of mind etc...

 

Anyhoo - the threads here if you're interested:

 

http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/Index.php?/topic/25495-empathy-and-aspergers/

 

HTH

 

L&P

 

BD

[Tally]

And then there is the problem that many people use both terms interchangeably without knowing the difference.