Adult diagnosis of Aspergers Syndrome

[Edward T]

My son has Asperger's syndrome and having taken some of the tests on the various websites it is possible I am an undiagnosed Aspie.

 

I asked my GP about being diagnosed but that has proved friutless.

 

So can someone advise me on how I can be tested and have a dianosis that will be recognised by my employer.

 

I look forward to any responses and others experience.

 

Thank you

[ceecee]

I cant really advise you because I personally haven't gone down that route.I have recently discovered that I too have A>S> but fortunately mine appears fairly mild.I believe I have mild ocd too.

 

I would say if your son has aspergers and you suspect that you have in all probability it is more than possible.

 

Aspergers is quite hereditary.There are many people on this site who have discovered through their child or relative having aspergers that they in fact have it too.

 

This is a great website very welcoming and friendly and I am sure someone will come along able to advice you.There is a wealth of knowledge on here.

 

Best wishes

Edited December 15, 2005 by ceecee

[lindy-lou]

if your gp is being unhelpful then you could try speaking to the doctor who gave you your sons diagnosis or the staff at the cdc if he attended one,they will maybe be able to tell you how to go about being assessed yourself,if not try and get an appointment with a different gp and explain your fears and how you think getting a diagnosis will benefit you,best of luck

 

lynda x

[nellie]

Welcome to the forum Edward

 

As ceecee says there are many adults on here who have realised they may have AS after their child has been diagnosed.

 

My husband was diagnosed a few years ago.

 

This topic has been discussed at length on the forum, if you use the search engine at the top right hand corner of the page you should be able to find some helpful information.

 

This is a recent topic.

Adult diagnosis of Aspergers, When, why and how?

http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.ph...t=0entry55437

 

This is a great forum, I hope you find it useful.

 

Nellie xx

[anxiousmom]

Hi Edward,

 

I started the other thread on adult AS diagnosis. At first I was toying with the idea but wasn't really sure it was all me... you know how you can have a runny nose and sore throat but it doesn't mean you have flu! (Don't worry I do't make much sense to myself either).

 

Since then however I''ve been reading more (like how dangerous is that) and so much of it fits me... in fact my latest obbsession is me finding out all I can about AS.

 

I've not been to my GP.... he's great and would reffer me in a shot.... but waiting kills me and I'm a bit of a control freak. I'm actually undergoing some cognitive behavioural therapy so I'm in touch with a clinical psychologist and I'm seeing her tomorrow (of course having completed non of the excersises she wanted me to do but with 101 reasons why I think I have AS) I don't think she's in a position to diagnose me but I'm hoping that she can refer me to a man who can.

 

Also I'm trying to speak to someone on the autism helpline as it doesn't look like theres a lot of folk out there who do adult diagnosis.

 

There's definately something a bit of a miss in my head and I've struggled in one way or another all my life. I just thought I chose cr*p freinds... but actually they just get frustrated with me and for the life of me I don't know why. I'm a logical genious but people scare or annoy me.... or I want to spend every waking moment with them. A dx for me would answer so many questions and allow me to put away some demons.... I've spent my whole life wondering why I have any and trying to evict them (you can't evict them if you don't kow who let them in in the first place)... with a dx I can let them stay and just make them behave a little better.... and be more understanding when they do come out and have a rave in my head. (of course I could just be a crazy lady!! )

 

Anyway... here I am waffling on. I'll let you know what the autism helpline folk say... they are really good and worth a call.

 

Good luck

[DAS999]

We just nagged our GP till he listened (He was very good when he did start listening). He made referrals to the right people. Your GP, from what I understand cannot not refer you if thats what you want. I would go back and try again.

Welcome and all the best. Keep us posted on how it goes

[anxiousmom]

Came accross this... dunno if it's near you but there are lots of good reads on this site. the NAS helpline mentioned the place so it's legit.

 

http://www.autismresearchcentre.com/clinical/class.asp

[bookwyrm]

I went to my GP to ask for a referral. I found it very difficult as I get so emotional about, well about lots of things. I explained how difficult I find using a telephone (My mum had to make the GP appointment for me as I simply couldn't - I am 40 ) So the referral came and it wasn't with a specialist but was an invitation to talk to some one and I had to phone to explain and make an appointment. So that didn't happen. I couldn't even bring myself to phone my mum and ask her to do it

But then I ask myself why I want a referral - the process would only upset me, and I would worry that someone would want to intefere in my life.

A letter did come from the GP later, but I couldn't bring myself to open it

 

I would like to have a definite diagnosis just to quell my self doubt. And it would be useful to stop my Dad making idiotic comments about what I ought to do. My Mum is far more understanding these days since I talked to her about it. She doesn't keep pressuring me to join in social situations for example.

[anxiousmom]

I so see where you are coming from. I swing between needing to know NOW... then to thinking why could it possibly help me.

 

More recently I could just say to a 'freind' (that I've managed to annoy SO many times,) that I'm just not coping with talking to people right now and maybe she'd know why, rather than annoy me about it and punish me for my withdrawal. And maybe just maybe I wouldn't beat myself up about it all. I'm sufferring Cognitive Behavioural Therapy... which to me is tree hugging touchy feely stuff that I really don't like. If I knew that I struggeled with ABC because of aspergers then maybe I'd try learn some rules and all would be logical and achieveable for me. Maybe just maybe... too many maybes!!

 

I've recently got hubby to put caller display on the phones as I'm so not able to speak to people right now... I would look at the ringing phone and go into hot sweats.

 

My biggest hurdle for the diagnosis right now is having to drag mum along to answer questions about my childhood.... her stock answer to which is always "I had 4 kids how am I supposed to remember anything". Also I know my lovely down to earth parents think anything can be fixed with a stiff upper lip and pulling yourself together. They'll take it as a person critisism.

 

They thought I was over reacting having my son looked at... and he has AS...

 

eek phone's ringing.... phew wrong number!

 

so for me today right now I'd love a DX.... but tomorrow.... I'll have another obsession!

[ceecee]

I think from things i have read and info on this site many people with A>S> struggle with the telephone.I do a bit but not too bad.I have to sometimes write down what i want to say first otherwise I can be kind of struck dumb or talk really fast.

 

Life's fun isn't it.

 

People with As often withdraw from people and love to be on their own.Me I do love my own compant but only to a point then I start to get lonely.

[bookwyrm]

Not just me and phones then

 

Caller ID would be a good idea. If I get too stressed I have to turn the wretched thing off. Hasn't happened for a while though But I still have a reputation for being hard to get hold of

If anyone else is at home I leave it for them to answer, except my ms yells at me for doing that - hormones And ys has AS too and also ignores it, or answers and is really rude I was asked if I had a bossy babysitter the other day - I am sure it was him who answered the phone

 

I have spent ages researching about AS online - it definitely was an obsession for a while there. I can feel it drawing a bit again, but I have so many other things going at the moment, hopefully it won't grab so hard this time. The actual process of getting assessed would be very stressful. I have enough professionals to deal with with my es going through transition, although it would be helpful to be able to explain to them why I am not cut out to advocate well for him During meetings I am fighting down waves of nausea and trying not to cry, usually haven't slept for days before hand, and will need to spend several days recovering afterwards. I was not the right parent for him God knows where he will end up.

 

Deepbreath, one step at a time, don't panic.

Deepbreath, one step at a time, don't panic.

[bid]

Oh Bookwyrm <'>

 

You are the right parent for your son, because you are his mother and you love him in a way that no one else can possibly ever love him <'>

 

Advocacy is hard...is there anyone you could ask to accompany you to meetings, even if it was just to support you?

 

Please don't be so hard on yourself It sounds as though you are doing your absolute best for your son, and none of us can do any more than that.

 

Take care <'>

 

Bid <'>

[bookwyrm]

I certainly do love him

 

but he needs more than that

 

Which is why he is at residential school, and needs somewhere to go when he is 19.

 

But he just came home for the weekend and we had a nice time He was very very affectionate and only thumped me a few times. We put the Christmas tree up and decorated and he stuck his arm down his stocking when we found it looking for a present

 

And he managed to say rabbits

it came out Rugby at first but he corrected himself

[bid]

Bookwyrm,

 

My son goes to a residential school too <'>

 

Bid

[bookwyrm]

The school is great, he loves it, and it is close so he comes home alot, but I can take him back if things get too fraught.

 

But it was the hardest time ever when it became apparent I couldn't keep him at home anymore

 

And now he has to leave that wonderful place

 

I hope you don't have transition looming too large. It is almost as bad as their going in the first place

 

Does your son like it?

I am very lucky that mine has been so happy at his.

[bid]

Yup, we're in the middle of transition right now!

 

He loves his school, too. He's got a place at a residential special FE college for AS, but we're just about to go to panel to start the funding application

 

It was hard when he went away to school, but I firmly believe that by fighting for him to go, we have given him back his future

 

Hang in there, Bookwyrm (love your user name, by the way ). Have you got a Section 140 for your son yet, or will he be going somewhere that is funded by your LEA so that he keeps his Statement?

 

Good luck <'>

 

Bid

[bookwyrm]

I hope your funding ap goes well. I am not looking forward to that bit.

 

I haven't heard of a section 140, and I thought statements were only for children. He'll be 19 before he moves. Something to insist on the fact that he needs further education would be great though. I have totally drawn a blank on residential colleges. There are so few 52 week ones. He had an assessment booked at one but then then they changed to only 38 week provision and social services refuse to consider respite care for him in the holidays. And anyway the place was so far away It is very important to him to be able to come home, even though he gets bored after a day or two and needs to go away again.

[Edward T]

Thank you for the advice and the references.

I have printed off some articles from the National Autistic Society.

 

The more I read the more I think I probably have AS and at 53 that explains quite a lot about some of my experiences.

 

In the past I have been described as being "as subtle as an Exocet" because I have told someone the truth in a frank and concise manner. I have always wondered why they have taken offence to the facts as I express them.

 

I don't think I am going to change now but I think the diagnosis may help some of my colleagues understand where I am coming from.

 

Thank you for all your replies.

 

Edward T

[ceecee]

Best of luck on your journey.No you probably won't be able to change but hopefully further knowledge and understanding of the condition will help you understand yourself more and therefore be able to educate others as to why you are like you are.

 

Best of luck.You are never to old for a diagnosis if that is what you think you need,

 

Best Wishes

[MarknotGeorge]

Hello, I've made an introduction on the Intro thread, but this is more relevant to what I want to say.

 

I've been trying to get a diagnosis on and off for a few years now. My wife and I strongly suspect I have AS to some degree. So far, my GP (and I've tried 3 different ones) has kept referring me to the community mental health team, who when I went to see them the first time seemed to think that because I have a wife, family and a job, labelling me would serve no purpose. The last time I went, about 6 weeks or so ago now, I took details of Elliot house along, and my GP said she'd try to get a referral. Since then, I've had what I think was a major meltdown (to cut a long story short, had an arguement with my wife, drove my car through my father-in-law's garage door, tried to walk to Elliot House via the Trent & Mersey canal), and home life is not what it should be.

 

I just want to speak to someone who knows about ASDs, so I can find out why I am how I am.

[MarknotGeorge]

I think from things i have read and info on this site many people with A>S> struggle with the telephone.I do a bit but not too bad.I have to sometimes write down what i want to say first otherwise I can be kind of struck dumb or talk really fast.

 

I don't like phones either. Maybe it's because people assume I'm female on it. I once had to hang up and redial as the woman at Orange would not believe she was talking to Mr MnG.

 

We have two phone number chez moi. One of which is the business line, which I never answer, leaving it to go to the answer phone. This is the number my wife uses for business, and the number I give out to the bank, etc. I'll call them back if it's for me and I want to. The other number is strictly for family and friends (and sales calls from Indian telecoms companies)

[adamsmum]

thats a good idea. i hate the phone. My partner has to answer it.

[ceecee]

Marknotgeorge

 

I really hope you get the support and help you feel you need.just because you have a wife a family and a job does not mean you don't need help and it is ignorant to presume you don't.

 

Without wishing to be rude what about the affect your suspected a.s. has on your family and your life etc.Do not give up.You need someone to listen to your concerns not just dismiss them because you appear to be coping it doesn't mean you actually are.

 

I suspect one of my close relatives to have a.s. and the effect their suspected a.s. has had on people around them is devistating.They too had a wife family and job.Never under estimate the effectas of a.s.

 

I suspect i too have mild a.s. but according to my husband fortunately it doesn't have too much of an impact on people around me.yes we have good weeks and bad but overall it's fairly managable.I also have ocd.I too have a husband and family and a job but that does not mean I don't have a.s.

 

Keep pushing until you get the answer and peace of mind you deserve. <'> <'> <'>