Not eating at school

[nikrix]

My daughter has a big problem at the moment where she will not eat, this is to do with the other children that she sits with. It has been going on for some time now, other children will eat with their mouth open and they food may fall out of there mouth. Now P is funny with food anyway she does not like certain smells and she likes things just so when eating. I have been to the school many times to bring this matter up and they said it would be sorted. I think P must have had a big meltdown at school over all this and now the class teacher has spoken to the whole class about it and is also putting monitors in place to watch, so P does not become distressed.

Do any of your children have these problems? I think other children pick up on P issue's and this can make it worse.

 

Nikrix

[Tylers-mum]

Ewww!! There's nothing worse than a person (capable that is) eating with their mouth open. I often have to correct my 12yr old nephew for doing this, it is foul and I do not blame your dd one bit for being fussy with that! My son is 6 and eats properly at the table!

Haven't really noticed any issues with him eating meals around other people, at least the school haven't informed me anyway and T hasn't mentioned anything.

 

Is it worth sitting her somewhere on her own or maybe as someone else mentioned before, finding a room where she could eat her meals?? (that's if she'd prefer that of course.)

Kids can be sooo cruel, I know that half the kids in T's class whom he 'thinks' are his friends are infact, just stringing him along for a laugh. It is sooo annoying but nothing I say to him (not that I have tried mind you) will make an ounce of difference in his mind.

 

Good Luck and I hope the school follows through for you and P this time.

[UltraMum]

A friend's son eats in the library (? that's what the school have arranged) but a separate room must be a possibility.

 

 

On the eating with your mouth open DH does this (not very D when he's doing it!) - so does F-i-L - I am going to make sure J doesn't follow the tradiiton!

[spectrumlady]

My son is the same (14yrs) he has to sit on his own or at leat facing away from others. He cannot deal with watching other people eat, although he's OK with family members (they have table manners !!) but also he is sensitive to the smells of the food that other people have. Once he created holy hell in the dining room, and the Head became involved in a search for a "single" table that he could sit at on his own facing the wall, sounds dreadful and looks like exclusion, however, he was far more comfortable with this arrangement. I know other kids like this too, so you're not on your own.

[nellie]

Any child with ASD who doesn't like eating in company, for whatever reason, should be allowed to eat in private. It's a reasonable adjustment that should be made to meet the child's needs.

 

My son spent years pretending to eat his packed lunch, it was a constant battle to get the school to understand. He's now 27 and still prefers to eat where no one can see him.

 

Nellie xx

[phasmid]

Exactly Nellie "A reasonable adjustment", one that could and, where necessary, should be very easily sorted out at ANY school.

[nikrix]

nellie Posted Today, 03:12 PM

Any child with ASD who doesn't like eating in company, for whatever reason, should be allowed to eat in private. It's a reasonable adjustment that should be made to meet the child's needs.

 

Thanks nellie and Phasmid, I will talk to P and see what she would like to do. She has never liked dinner time, she does not like large number of children she has to eat with, to much going on. But I don't think she would like to be on her own eating either, maybe I am wrong. She gets worried about what she is meant to do next and if there is no one there to tell she may become anxious. She does need less people round her when eating.

 

I think more talks with the school are needed.

 

Nikrix

Edited January 13, 2006 by nikrix

[something_different]

Is it a big school?

 

With a lot of kids in having lunch at one time?

 

Couldn't they sort out a table for her and maybe 1 or 2 friends who she feels comfortable with?

[lil_me]

Just been through this with my son, we've had amazing success by school allowing him to sit in the library for lunch. He didn't think he would like eating alone at first but it is the best thing we ever diid for him.

[Melow]

Just been through this with my son, we've had amazing success by school allowing him to sit in the library for lunch. He didn't think he would like eating alone at first but it is the best thing we ever diid for him.

 

 

I'm not sure about this (Eating alone). It can make things very difficult for parents. My lad won't ENTER a caf� or restaurant, let alone find a quiet corner to eat on his own, I think (I sincerely HOPE), this can be addressed, I'm none too sure how far we need to go to 'accommodate' everything an ASD needs, it isn't just the child, but us too, I cannot take a day out with him he wouldn't eat a meal, certainly a Holiday is out of the question. I would certainly not lean on a school to allow them to isolate themselves, it would appear to me to make school (And addressing issues), pointless. Some things I think, if it is possible, Aspies HAVE to learn, I consider eating, toilet usage, and dressing, pretty much some of these basic things. I know it is so hard, but parents have to I think, draw some line, they will personally know best in the home, but outside ? and here is where most issues can be as they get older, society is NOT going to accommodate them, they should learn this, preferably before they leave schools not after. My lad DOES eat with peers at school, so in my case I feel completely at a loss as to why he won't outside, but it makes little difference how sympathetic caf�s and such are to him, he won't co-operate. Our life is on hold until we can address this, that's the fact of it, last thing I want is isolatory tendencies to be accommodated really.

Edited January 14, 2006 by Melow

[adamsmum]

The trouble is in school its a long day to go without food. A child should not be forced to eat in public just to fit in. A private place to eat is not much to ask. I hate eating in publice for me it is a private thing. Adam will not eat out and for the rest of the family thats fine as thats the way Adam is. I don't know if he will grow out of it or not but then it could be worse. Not eating out is not the end of the would is it.

[phasmid]

Mellow, your post has really annoyed me. I can see you clearly have problems with eating and your sons ASD but I find the tone of your post...well, rude to be honest:

 

I'm not sure about this (Eating alone). It can make things very difficult for parents.

 

Yes, of course it can make things difficult for us as parents - it's much harder for our children - many of whom may not be able to explain why they dislike eating in front of others (or seeing others eating)

 

My lad won't ENTER a caf� or restaurant, let alone find a quiet corner to eat on his own, I think (I sincerely HOPE), this can be addressed, I'm none too sure how far we need to go to 'accommodate' everything an ASD needs, it isn't just the child, but us too, I cannot take a day out with him he wouldn't eat a meal, certainly a Holiday is out of the question.

 

You talk about 'accommodating' everything 'an ASD needs' making a child (yours or mine come to that) sound as if they are a naughty puppy. Perhaps 'accommodating their needs' should be looked as understanding their problems/difficulties. Learning to live with rather than being governed by the problems is the approach I take.

 

I would certainly not lean on a school to allow them to isolate themselves, it would appear to me to make school (And addressing issues), pointless.

 

Hang on! Don't be short sighted here. This thread was started by a parent who would rather see their child eat than not at lunchtime. I will wear both my hats here, a parent and a professional one - and I don't do this often, if ever on here! Have you ever worked with a child who has any form of eating disorder? I have. A child where I work would not, under any circumstances eat in the dinner hall. He'd open his lunchbox and just sit there. Eat nothing, drink nothing. This child 'needed' to eat to function. So it was arranged for him to eat in a room next to the dinning hall. He began to eat,perhaps, a nibble or two a day at first - not a lot but a start. Two years later he would be in the hall with the others happily eating at the same time. That took one hell of a lot of effort on our behalf, but it was so good to see it! As a parent that is the approach I would want my childs school to take. So it may start with eating in isolation but that doesn't mean it has to stay that way!

 

 

Some things I think, if it is possible, Aspies HAVE to learn, I consider eating, toilet usage, and dressing, pretty much some of these basic things. I know it is so hard, but parents have to I think, draw some line, they will personally know best in the home, but outside ? and here is where most issues can be as they get older, society is NOT going to accommodate them, they should learn this, preferably before they leave schools not after.

 

Hmm...If you step outside your home at any time I think it qualifies you, as the person who knows that child best (note: you may not be their parent and they may not be your child), to be able to consder what they perhaps can and cannot cope with. Yes, I know my son will have to cope with the world outside our door on his own in the end (if phas jr thinks he or his brothers hev a roof for life they're in for a shock!). As a parent it is my job to equip him to the best of his ability via the best of mine to cope with it when that happens. That may involve big steps or little ones, who knows, but we will take them as and when needed at the speed that suits us both but mainly him, cos thats the way it should be! Then there is the little matter of the DDA - which says society should make some adjsutments for our kids - just as the have for those in wheelchairs, or is that wrong?

 

 

My lad DOES eat with peers at school, so in my case I feel completely at a loss as to why he won't outside, but it makes little difference how sympathetic caf�s and such are to him, he won't co-operate. Our life is on hold until we can address this, that's the fact of it, last thing I want is isolatory tendencies to be accommodated really.

 

Your son has clearly found a coping stratergy for eating in school, I applaud him for that. Don't, please don't, have a go at a parent who wants the same thing for their child. I hope you find a way around your problem just as I hope that Nikrix can find a way around her daughters problem.

Edited January 14, 2006 by phasmid

[adamsmum]

Good on you phasmid

[lorryw]

Hi Nikrix,

It really shouldnt be a huge problem for school to deal with. We have a little lass at our school who has her lunch a few minutes before the others. She is accompanied by an LSA to help her feel more comfortable. She was totally panicked by the whole lunctime experience, noise, smells and children being children, mess! It has taken a while but she can now cope with it.

I do agree with you Melow. Society will not change to accommodate our children. Things will improve but ignorance is still in abundance out there. How many restaurants have a special isolated table for autistic spectrum individuals? The DDA seems mostly geared towards meeting physical needs. Our children do grow into adults and small issues can grow into huge life affecting problems. I just think personally that finding ways to cope and work through problems when they first arise is better for the child and family.

Lorainexx

[lil_me]

I don't think I really need to add much more. What would I rather, my son eating and sitting seperately as he can not even consider eating with others, or him not eat at all. I know which I prefer.

 

He will eventually be asked to rejoin his peers once he starts eating at school, which he had not done since at full time nursery 4 years ago. If he is not ready he won't be forced to do so. Until then if he's happy, so am I. This is the only time my son is 'isolated' at school, he was going to be excluded because of his behaviour before this, as just before lunch every day he would bite, nip, kick, punch etc anyone as he was getting anxious about lunch time and he was doing the same all the way through lunch which stopped other children being able to eat. He also armed himself including punching himself and hitting his head off the table until he bled.

 

It would only be difficult as a parent if I did not understand his disorder which after all is one which affects his social and communiative behaviour, and I was bothered what other people think. It isn't an issue for me, the school, the people we socialise with, the restaurants we go to and yes we do visit them and he has as good a time as everyone else, just eats his dinner seperately which he prefers, same if we went on holiday, we know strategies now which help him cope.

 

I have had to explain initially at the places we visit but it has never been a problem. If they are short of space, we eat then leave the table whilst he eats. Not a problem. Society will change if people stop being afraid of what others think and ask for the small adjustments which noone minds to make life ten times easier. My son is not naughty and I will not have him treated as just a naughty child, he has a disorder which makes the world we live in a trickier place to cope with for him, but with a little understanding, it isn't a problem.

 

I would not expect a person in a wheel chair to walk to a table and sit on the correct seats, so I see no reason why my son should be forced to do something he finds extremely difficult, actually close to impossible, because of his disability.

 

Who on earth said people had to eat together anyway, it's just yet another thing humans think they should do, but why, it isn't essential is it ?

 

As always when dealing with a problem I ask myself DOES IT REALLY MATTER ?

 

We are working towards my son being able to eat closer to others, and he is making small improvements, he doesn't fall off the chair as we are eating as a family as much because he is trying to get away, but I understand how hard this is for him and it will take time. He still won't use anyone elses toilet but we are also working with ideas to solve this one.

 

I am really pleased to hear most children can eat with their peers/friends/family fine, every child on the spectrum we attend functions with the support group with can, but my son can't. Noone treats him any different for it. Maybe it is because they understand his disorder.

Edited January 14, 2006 by lil_me

[Kathryn]

My daughter never liked eating in school either and still is reluctant to eat in front of people she doesn't know. She has difficulty eating with utensils so a lot of the time she just uses her fingers, and she knows this is not the polite thing to do in company and she is afraid of making a mess, so she prefers to be alone. However, I posted on another thread about how much she enjoyed going to a restaurant recently - so things can change!

 

She doesn't eat at college although she began by saying she would like a packed lunch. This was quite a challenge as she doesn't like many of the things you would put into a lunchbox. After trial and error I've resorted to giving her an apple and three penguin bars. Not very nutritious but at least she's getting some energy during the day.

[nikrix]

I spoke to a friend about this issue today and here is what she said. " it is her problem, why should the other chidren have to suffer? everyone eats differently! There is 2 other chidren in another class with ASD and they are disruptive and upset the rest of the class, They should go to school for they dx, so it does not upset everyone.

Yes P has a big problem with this, she can not help the way she is. This is a good friend of mine saying these things. Why do people not understand?

 

Some things I think, if it is possible, Aspies HAVE to learn, I consider eating, toilet usage, and dressing, pretty much some of these basic things. I know it is so hard, but parents have to I think, draw some line, they will personally know best in the home, but outside ? and here is where most issues can be as they get older, society is NOT going to accommodate them, they should learn this, preferably before they leave schools not after

.

 

I think this is what my friend was trying to say. My daughter already has a problem with getting anxious and making herself ill, should I just let her get on with it and suffer? I don't think so

Edited January 14, 2006 by nikrix

[lil_me]

People react like this due to lack of understanding, I think with these types of issues it is impossible to comment if you have not been there yourself.

 

I think the most important thing to be learned by the other children is that some people are different. Why should a child attend a special needs school just so they don't have to make adjustments to include all persons in a school.

 

I have put it in several ways when people have questioned what I and the school have done, from the comment I made to I wouldn't expect a wheel chair user to walk to a table and sit in a proper seat, to I wouldn't expect my son to eat nuts if he was allergic, so why would I put him through eating with other people if it makes him feel so anxious.

 

Go with what you think is best for your daughter, but communicate with her first to see what she wants, try something, see if it works, give it a little while of course and if it doesn't try something else.

 

I ignore comments of those who have no idea how traumatic these things can be and just have the fix the child attitude. I have gone through 3 years of hell sorting this problem out, including my son passing out due to lack of food and drink as he would not even drink in front of others, and I would have done it sooner if I had ignored those comments. I now have a happy little boy who eats his meals, priceless.

 

Best of luck sorting this one out <'>

 

 

 

 

And Kathryn, I know what you mean with the utensils issue, my son won't eat most 'wet' foods like beans, spaghetti etc as he uses his hands. Luckily we've found a set lunch which he takes daily, and thankfully prefers routine so doesn't get bored of these items. Just leaves me to worry about making sure we have everything in for him.

[Melow]

It's a shame I'm a bad parent now... I went through all the eating issues via school, even to going there at mealtimes to spoon feed him, there was no question of my son going to school all day and not eating, I'd not have it, and rowed with one school who never told me for 2 months it was happening. Whatever it took to ensure he did, I took those steps as I could. The fact he eats at school WITH other peers now, is also down to me, not the school because in working with him at school mealtimes, I sat myself and him with peers. It took a very very long time to wean myself out of my feeding him, but I did do it. The schools were just out of their depth and had no idea how to work at it, experts ? who ? I've never seen any. There is no question I am trying to make him 'normal' either, that's not on, and the suggestion I feel unfair.

 

Do I find aspects of his behaviour limiting ? of course ! aren't I allowed to say so ? but I'd never force an issue I felt was 'against his nature as an aspie', after a lifetime bringing him up, I have to trust my own judgement on what I feel he can, and cannot do, don't we ALL work this way ? Our entire life as parents revolves totally on bringing up our son, we don't do holidays, we don't have baby-sitters, we don't have SUPPORT from SS, we don't have extended family to help out, and until recently our son was never at an autistic unit, we do the best we are able. Outside eating has just still proved impossible. I am optomistic, I have to be, I can and will try to help there too, he has shown an ability to do it already at school, and there too it was thought better he eat alone, as 'aspies prefer this' maybe some do, I didn't agree mine did, the proof is there for people to see at the school I was right.

 

I can asure people here I go every possible mile, but allow me to adjudge when I think some isolatory tendencies are apparent because of wrong application of help/support, (some from me, I admit I don't understand all aspy issues who does ? and far more from people outside). Nobody either, can tell ME, anything about rights, my own, or my child's. I've a lifetime of fighting for it, his, and mine. It can be difficult to know if a decision is right or wrong, when you do not understand completely what the issue is, nor ever can. It's called being a parent.

 

I don't care for PC response either, they aren't relevant, common-sense is.

[phasmid]

It's a shame I'm a bad parent now... I went through all the eating issues via school, even to going there at mealtimes to spoon feed him, there was no question of my son going to school all day and not eating, I'd not have it, and rowed with one school who never told me for 2 months it was happening. Whatever it took to ensure he did, I took those steps as I could.

 

If my post infered you are a bad parent it was not intentional. The point you make above a fair one. You did 'whatever it took' to resolve the issue - but isn't that exactly what Nikrix is trying to do for her daughter? Whatever it takes? If that means her eating alone to begin with (and then school/Nikrix?daughter?outside agnecies etc taking the time to work on the issues that are causing the problem and getting her daughter eating with others) how, can that be wrong? It may be a different method to the one you used but EVERY child, NT or ASD, is different and therefore the approaches taken for one may not work for another - you have to find out (often the hard way) what DOES work and then go with it.

 

Do I find aspects of his behaviour limiting ? of course ! aren't I allowed to say so ?

 

Yes of course you are, thats what this forum is all about. We don't all get it right all the time, we learn from our mistakes and sharing them, we (or at least I) hope others can learn from them too.

 

I've a lifetime of fighting for it, his, and mine. It can be difficult to know if a decision is right or wrong, when you do not understand completely what the issue is, nor ever can. It's called being a parent.

 

 

...and so say all of us!

[Jill]

I would not expect a person in a wheel chair to walk to a table and sit on the correct seats, so I see no reason why my son should be forced to do something he finds extremely difficult, actually close to impossible, because of his disability.

 

 

Hear Hear Lil Me, Hear Hear Phasmid.

 

 

Melow - no-one is saying that you are a bad parent. You've obviously found a strategy that works for you & I'm pleased for you. However, your original post does sound like you are having a go at Nikrix. We all have difficult lives at times and come here for support. Let Nikrix ask for advice and maybe find a useful suggestion from other parents on here - let her find what works for her, like you've found what works for you - don't have a go.

 

Nikrix - <'> hope you sort this out. I can't offer any practical advice I'm afraid, this is beyond my experience. Sending you lots of <'> though.

[nikrix]

Thank you all, most of you have been very supportive.

 

How are we meant to help our children in situations like this, when most peoples views are, that is our childrens problem they are the way they are and they should deal with it. They should not be in class with other children if they cannot cope, send them to a special school. This just makes me so mad. It does not matter that their children are most probably spitting food out and putting smelly food in front of my daughters face because they have pick up that she does like this and now she is not eating. Yes I will always have problem like this to contend with, but I will always be there. I am not going to be hard on her and let her get on with it, because this could cause so many more problem and as some of you know P already suffers with stomach problem due to her getting anxious.

 

At the moment I am just seeing how she gets on, now they have had a talking to, but if anything else happens I will be having a few strong words. I think then I will have to make other arrangements for her.

[nikrix]

Went to the school today because things are not getting any better. I saw P class teacher I explained that things were no better and would it be possible that she sat somewhere else...If not I would have to maybe take her home for dinner. She said that she would get some-one to monitor her...a dinner lady, thats no help they are to busy doing other things. She also said that she could not sit on her own because there is no-one to supervise her and they would not be insured for her. P has a statement for 15 hours, but also the lea have stated that 7 hours on top of this should be used for playtime and dinner as P had loads of problems at this time. It is not in the statement but written separate and to be reviewed, which it has and they are meant to keep it in place.

Her annual review is due in May and I do want things changed, as I don't think they are using the 22 hours for P. I have not wanted it changed before so I may need some help please. I want the 7 hours for playtime and dinner now put into the statement. I also want the 15 hours to stand for a bit more because the class room assistant is used for the whole class. P does need this she is below average in all subjects. She finds it hard to write a sentence and gets it all muddled up. Instructions is also another area that she can be bad at, not understanding them. She also has a list of langauge problems. Do I have to write this all down before the annual review or can I take it on the day? Sorry not sure how it works

 

Nikrix

Edited January 17, 2006 by nikrix

[phasmid]

If the school ask you to go down the route of taking her out for lunchtimes they are in breach of lots of laws! If you look on the illegal exclusions thread I started (it's one of the 'pinned threads' at the top of the forum index) it explains a lot about it. They are dodging their responsibilities here. This ought to be achievable - it is a 'reasonable adjustment' for them to make. A formal written request should now be made to the head asking for your daughter eating arrangements to be examined and any necessary steps taken to enable her to have her food in a place which does not cause her distress. Gve them a set number of days to reply to you (a week is plenty) and see what they say. I'll try to find the relevant bits you need to quote at them in the letter. Let's see what that does.

[nikrix]

Sorry phasmid, I may have worded my post wrong. They don't seem to have the answers.....so I said if things do not get better than I will take her home for lunch. It is causing her destress....stomach problems starting again. I will give them another week if things are no better I will write a letter to the head. I also don't know where I stand with the 7 hours what are meant to be for these times, whats the point in having it if it's not being used? The statement has not changed since she first had it. The 7 hours was left out because they thought she might settle, but it has stayed because she still has loads of problems at playtime.

[nellie]

Nikrix,

 

You can ask for an interim review. Which means you can request that the annual review be brought forward. You would have good cause to do this, as this problem could affect your child's health or development and could be considered to be a crisis situation. She is also at risk of disaffection. I would put the request in writing to the head and copy to the LEA.

 

Meanwhile I think the school should be working to solve this problem. They can't and should not ignore it.

 

Good luck.

 

Nellie xx

[phasmid]

I'd say the 7 hours is supposed to be full time 1-1 suprt during lunchtimes (around 1 hr a day) and breaktimes (20 mins per day) making a total of 6hrs 40. of course if lunchtime is just over an hr then that is where the 7 hrs is arrived at. Ask the school outright about these hours and what they are doing with the funding for them.

 

You did make yourself clear about lunchtimes, however even with your agreement this is still an illegal exclusin policy that would be operating due t your daughters difficulties related to her dx. It is not a solution as such - it merely allows them to dodge their responsibilities!

[phasmid]

Nellie is quite right about the dissafection issue. Mention that to the LEA! Then watch the fireworks fly. They hate that phrase!

[nellie]

Nikrix,

 

I would seek advice from IPSEA or NAS education advocacy about getting the necessary changes to the statement.

 

Nellie xx

[nikrix]

Thanks Phas and Nellie, I will look into it.

 

I just feel that there is always problems and always a battle to get things done, its so draining. I feel I am constantly nagging the school about one thing or another. Wish it was easier, even when they have a statement things are never put in place, Well thats what I feel. I don't want some-one sitting over her, just some-one there when needed (thats not asking much)

 

Thanks again, I will keep you posted

[nikrix]

Hi all just a update.

 

This is what is in P statement

P will require considerable support within mainstream setting. She will require a visual timetable and a clear start and finish to each task. She will require support to express herself clearly and to make her needs known and initially this could be developed through the use of a visual timetable. Tasks will need to be appropriately differentiated in respect of her language and communication difficulties. Advice has been given by the Speech and Language therapist in her report about the ways in which P should be supported in the classroom and this included advice about the way in which p should be addressed in whole class teaching sessions. The school should refer to the relevant report. P will require a highly structured IEP which is reviewed regularly in consultation with a teacher who has expererience and expertise in supporting children with Autistic Spectrum disorders and the Speech and Language Services.P will need significant support at less structured times such as playtime and lunchtime.

 

The support may be used both individual basis and part of a small group which ever is appropriate to her current needs.

 

Part 2: special educational needs

1: educational

That is where the above quote came from.

Also repeated in Educational provision to meet needs and objectives, think thats part 3

 

I have phoned the LEA today to speak to P case worker, she said the 7.5 hours run up to last year in November, and then it was funded differently, because they have brought in a new way of funding our children(Is this Audit funding?). So if my child needs more help at some time the funding is there, also works the other way if their need less, they can use that money else where.

 

I have asked for the hours to be put in her statement in part of the above quote, she is emailing the school today to find out where p hours are being used. She is also going to put my request in to the Education department at the LEA after I reported that she has had no help at these times which are stated in her statement. I am also going to write a letter requesting this, so any help on wording would be great.

 

Nikrix

[phasmid]

The funding issue does sound like they have gone the SEN Audit route. That said you can still insist that the support laid out in the statement is provided as written. It would also be good to get the support at 'unstructured times' quantified too.

 

Write out what you think is ok and we can give it the once over before you send it.

[nikrix]

P will need significant support at less structured times such as playtime and lunchtime.

 

Where it says significant i want 7.5 hours put in, that is additional to the 15 hours she gets teaching assistance a week.

 

I will write something up and see what you think.

 

thanks

 

nikrix

[nikrix]

(Child?s name) (date of birth)

 

Complaint that special education provision is not being made and that Support described in Statement is not quantified

 

I am writing as the parent of the above child, who has a Statement of Special Educational needs and attends .................. school.

 

Under Part 1 & 3, the Statement specifies the special educational provision my child should receive and I understand that you have a legal duty to ?arrange? this provision.

 

I am sorry to have to inform you that you are in breach of this duty, on the grounds that the following provision is currently not being made:

 

My child's Statement specifies that she should receive "significant support at less structured times". As a result, from (date) until Nov 05 she received 7.5 hours per week support during unstructured time, this I know was a temporary measure and to be reviewed, which it was and was kept in at the last annual review. These hours were not put in her statement but on the top letter which I received from you with the statement. This support ceased without my knowledge or consent at some time during Nov 05 and must be reinstated immediately.

 

My child's Statement currently describes that my daughter needs significant support at less structured times such as playtime and lunchtime. As my child is having a great deal of problems at these times, with no support, I am requesting that you amend my child's Statement to quantify this support. Please can you amend the statement to read ?P****N will need 7.5 hours TA support at less structured times such as playtime and lunchtime.

 

Please reply to this letter as soon as possible, but in any event within 5 working days of receiving it, confirming the steps that you will take to ensure that the special educational provision specified in my child?s Statement will, in fact be made.

 

I look forward to an early reply and trust that it will not be necessary to take this matter further.

 

Yours sincerely,

 

 

 

 

 

Under Part 1 & 3, the Statement specifies the special educational provision my child should receive and I understand that you have a legal duty to ?arrange? this provision

 

Not sure about this as its in part 1 & 3

 

Also should I say why she needs these hours put in?

 

This is a hard letter as the hours were never in the statement, just 15 hours. On the top letter that came back with the statement it said about the additional hours 7.5 to cover lunch time and playtime by a TA. These hours have not been covered even though they were paid for up till nov 05 and now its on the audit route.

Should the letter be less harsh seen I spoke to the lea this morning (case worker) and she is doing what she can.

Sorry a bit long winded, thanks for all your help

 

Nikrix

Edited January 18, 2006 by nikrix

[Guest flutter]

this is something that i think we will be doing after half term, and i may be making notes form this to get head straight on it all.

we are finding that is not being eaten at all.

we have decided we need to go in a bring up a few things, and will be taking her mental hearth nurse with us i think for support

i also want to see her iep, which they do but parents have no input with

but we need to get over the flu 1st

[niki]

a ;ot of good information here and i am glad someone brought up this subject as this is a HUGE problem i have with my son, he will not eat nor drink at school. He doesnt like being around other ppl whilst they are eating he says the noises hurt his ears and i do have to say the separate room idea sounds good to me, i have lost count of the times tricky has been ill because of sheer dehydration.

[ROBANDDEB]

Only me again

 

My Daughter stopped eating at school nearly 2 years ago now.

We all tried everything but to no avail she simply wont do it and that that .

She eats breakfast at home then goes to school and wont eat till she gets home.

But .... Apparantly they have on the odd occasion caught her ( though shes not aware ) slipping her hand in her pocket and putting something in her mouth when noone was looking. We double checked this and found out that sometimes she puts cereal in her pockets good job she didnt add milk

If we go out anywhere she will eat fine .. but not at school or anywhere she thinks she may be recognised by someone she knows !

:

 

We also have the same problem with the toilets now she will not use school toilets !?!