invent 10 things b4 breakfast Report post Posted January 27, 2006 (edited) Just a thought, as I'm sure my son's Head thinks there's nothing wrong with him and implies we have a home issue because he can generally behave at school. It doesn't matter how much you try and tell them about the effect the school day has on the child, it's always the same response, "oh he manages fine at school" I found some information on the NAS website which I adapted for my son and sent to his Head, it read... "The over-riding physical state for most people with Asperger?s Syndrome is anxiety. With X this anxiety is a result of him trying to constantly keep up with teachers' demands as well as other pupils? jokes and conversation. It can be difficult for people who have not come across Asperger?s Syndrome before, to appreciate the level of anxiety especially as many pupils have learnt to develop a superficial veneer of coping - appearing to 'fit in' socially in order to avoid being labelled odd and because many pupils with the diagnosis are keeping up with school work. However with X by the time he gets home he is feeling stressed, angry and worn out. These true feelings inevitably come out when he is at home and he can vent his frustrations in safety." They still didn't get it or chose to ignore it! Edited January 27, 2006 by baddad Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lisa Report post Posted January 27, 2006 We have the same problem. I've been trying for 2 years to get the school to understand, they still won't take it on board and treat me like a neurotic parent. I photocopy stuff and download things from the internet explaining this build up of pressure whenever I come across it in the hope that one day it'll finally sink in. I'm sure they think I'm making it up. The poll doesn't seem to be working, I would have liked to see the results of this. Lisa Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DaisyProudfoot Report post Posted January 27, 2006 We have exactly the same problem. Despite his dx HT refuses to believe there is anything wrong with my son. She agrees he has social and emotional problems at school and that's about it. Thankfully one of the teachers in the school also has a son with AS - he's quiet and presents differently to my boy - but at least she understands. The hardest thing is DLA wanted a report from the school in addition to the one from his psychiatrist and peadetrician and somehow I don't think it'll help his case Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
baddad Report post Posted January 27, 2006 Well, do they!!? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
justamom Report post Posted January 27, 2006 My AS son12, is excataly the same verywell behaved at school but when he gets home he is like a jeckel and hide - the first thing he does is strip he walks around in his undies. He does well to contain himself all day but we pay the price when he gets home. People don't believe me when I say that he can really kick off. I have often wanted to put a camera in the corner of my lounge for people to see what kind of behaviour we have to deal with. I have also been told he is coping well at school by the SENCO but he is not the one up all night with my son who is worried because he cant do the homework, worried because he has been told to socialize more generally or just getting used to high school. The SENCO does not like too "label" children, he says yes he has problems but he is fine..... Come and live with us for a few days and your opinion will change... The pressure of the school day is alot to deal with and we are the ones that know from first hand experience. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Elanor Report post Posted January 27, 2006 Yes, I'm used to this one. Have you seen this? http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.ph...owtopic=192&hl= Elanor Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
baddad Report post Posted January 27, 2006 INVENT 10 THINGS: sorry, hun - I couldn't 'fix' your original poll, so started a new thread with the poll with the intention of merging the two... Guess what. You CAN'T merge polls! I will try to copy/paste all the posts over, but would ask anyone else posting to look for the poll 'Passive at home/Meltdowns at school'... thanks, and sorry.. a very 'new to all this merging posts stuff' BD Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rainbow queen Report post Posted January 27, 2006 YES YES YES this is reason why im having trouble getting a dx of as for my son largley on the fact school think hes doing ok the moment he sets foot through the school doors by god do i pay for his day he will argue,scream,rant,moan ,kick,hit,swear,refuse to co operate,have to get him in car while all this is going on[at one time it was worse when had no car and he would not walk i had to drag him down the street] he carrys this lot on whilst im trying to drive and my 3 year old is in car who also gets it in the neck,it continues up my gate through front door in hallway-by which time my head is killing me i have to sit him on stool in kitchen with egg timer for 10 mins while he screams it all out-then timer goes of he gets off and calms down [till next episode over something else] Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pepper Report post Posted January 27, 2006 sheesh! i have similar here, i did phone senco last week - and constantly reiterated 'meltdowns' I got really empathic feedback ( which i distrust - due to last wonderful meet with loads of plans that never happened) Ive the distinct feeling that school staff think im a flake, hence they brush me under carpet anyway!! My sons 13 and although he has the odd episode at his mainstream grammer - its only the tip of iceberg - by time i get him home he cant breathe/speak or think straight ( for an hour!!) no wonder i sound a tad erratic when i do finally corner a member of staff! I suppose i really need t o get my point across more for sons sake but when uve had 4 hours of homework drama, coupled with tripple detentions and snotty homework book comments insinuating that u, as a parent, are failing - u come over a wee bit deranged in convo due to stress levels.deep joy ! lol but its very VERY reasuring to know im not on my own xx pep Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
invent 10 things b4 breakfast Report post Posted January 27, 2006 Thanks BD <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
smallworld Report post Posted January 28, 2006 Hi Pepper, 'flake', that's just how I imagine my son's school view me ! nice to not be the only one wac Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
