Malika Report post Posted February 6, 2006 Hi to all, <'> I just had such a bad month that I couldn't even put two words together. Firts of all we are not moving anymore the housing association put so many obstacles that it became impossible to accept they required that we would accept to visite the new place without even giving us the amount of the rent, (to bear in mind that a refusal would put us right down the bottom of the list) as we are paying full rent it was very relevant to know how much more it would be. Then while I was putting pressure on them to know the rent before visiting the place they told us that in any case we would have to move within 4 days after the visit bearing in mind that there are no gas or electricity meters they are all with token from another compagny, no flooring, no way to request anything before we have the contract. Eventually we found out that to live yes in a slightly bigger place in an area further away from my partner place of work and from my daughter school (and not such a nice area the back garden meters away from the railway) we would have to pay 25 % more every week , that housing association suppose to be very reasonable...??? I am still wondering what happened I sent an e-mail requesting some answers but did not receive any so I will have to send a copy by recorded letter and see why they refused to consider our difficulties and hardship and are requesting a rent well above what they usually set up. As if this was not enough our car has been vandelised by a groupe of #..@@&^%$ in the middle of the night and some B&&666##'@ have made transaction on my name through the internet and empty my bank account I found out as I was unable to get some cash from the machine being told by my bank that I was in red, I have now recover the money but the car is too damaged to be repaired and we are not yet able to buy another one. To add some more to that my daughter had bad result from the hospital and it seems that her thyroid is very unstable going up and down and we have to keep going to appointment every 4 weeks, H had a very bad virus and had to stay home for more than a week, the SENCO still does'nt get it in spite of a letter from my GP they still refuse to start a diary H is now not only refusing to go swimming with the school but as well to go to the once a week lunch groupe because they put everything on sport and running and he feels inadequate , the OT from Child developmental team is as well refusing to asseses him further (for sensory motor integration problems) saying that it is not necessary and I should go back to the lady who he has seen in August and doesn't knows much about autism and sensory motor integration issue. . Sorry for all the rambling i was hoping to go back to the board with a least some good news but.... I am trying to keep my chin up but it is trembling sometimes to the point that I feel that I cannot fight anylonger and I am no longer able to provide adequat care for H and even his sister. Tomorow I have an appointment with my GP and don't even know what to request, may be I should go to a pshychiatric ward for a while to be put under sedation and forget all about this big mess how far are we suppose to go and how much are we suppose to put up with ????? I am still waiting for fragile X test result for H and for his EEG. On the 14 th I will have my test for nerves conductions because of the pain and numbness in my feet, I am personnaly convince that it is a pb related to my own thyroid disfunction ... well wait and see. May be I should request some anti depressant to my GP. Hope to come back soon in better mood even without any better news. Take care all. Malika. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jb1964 Report post Posted February 6, 2006 I don't really know what to say to help you - I'm sure someone else will post soon that know's their stuff. Take care, Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
asereht Report post Posted February 6, 2006 (edited) Oh dear Malika, Sorry I can't help you, I am not having a good day either ( must be something in the air) feel like I am coming to the end of the road and can't fight anymore, No one in authority is listening to what I say regarding my son. I do hope you feel better soon. Take care. Theresa Edited February 6, 2006 by asereht Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rainbow queen Report post Posted February 6, 2006 <'> <'> <'> what an awfull lot to deal with at once,feel so sorry for you couldnt you get in touch with your mp about the housing stuff and tell him how you cant deal with all this as well as a disabled child? even better ask your gp to refer you to see a pychatrist[i am under one] they seem to offer more help with problems-i am always telling them about everything i deal with and they have got this mental health lady support worker who i can ring now if i need help trying to sort things out, she also mediates with the folk im having problems with. all this stress can really start to effect your mental health -dont be scared of asking for help yourself-because at the end of the day your the childrens carer and if your not well then what would happen then take care x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
UltraMum Report post Posted February 6, 2006 Malika Have a huge hug from me Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LKS Report post Posted February 6, 2006 Malika <'> <'> so sorry to hear about everything you are going through. Wish I could offer you some advice but I dont really have any answers, could you ring citizens advice about housing situation. Look after yourself Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DaisyProudfoot Report post Posted February 6, 2006 <'> <'> <'> Keep strong Malika and glad to see you back on the board Can you mention your child's disability to the housing association - it may help at bit. Daisy Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lynyona Report post Posted February 6, 2006 sorry things are going so badly <'> <'> <'> <'> malika <'> <'> <'> <'> lynn Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Malika Report post Posted February 6, 2006 Hi and a huge thanks to all of you, <'> <'> your kind words are such a comfort, Thank you so much. I still have to put things together, for the housing association it is not the first times I have problems with them they use to claim some money from me saying that housing benefit had not pay 3 weeks to them and it was my fault I had to take a layer from "law for all" who made me pay around ? 3 a week for more than a year while we were investigating with housing benefit it turned out that they had been pay but "lost" the payment however they refused to pay me back and eventually even serve a notice of repossession when my partner start to work and it did take time to have the roll on payement worked out. The housing officer gave me an appointment at home did not turned up and the day after I received the notice of seeking pssession, finaly it was sorted out by the manager of contact a Family who wrote a letter to the top management my complaint was withheld and all the money missing was paid back to me it took 3 years all together. I suppose that I have to send a recorded letter then if I have no answer I may have to go through the same processus send a letter to the top.... As for all the rest I'll try to speak to my GP tomorow and will keep you posted at least our HP for the car has been paid by the insurance we just have to find another car not so expensive probably older but i don't really care about that even if my partner does well he is the one who will use it anyway so.... Take care all. <'> <'> <'> Malika. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
baddad Report post Posted February 6, 2006 Hi malika - <'> <'> <'> I have absolutely nothing useful to say, but please accept my very VERY best wishes. I hope things get better for you soon <'> & BD Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kathryn Report post Posted February 6, 2006 (edited) Hi Malika, I was wondering where you were these days - missed the bouncing frogs! So sorry to hear about all the rough things life has chucked at you lately. <'> I hope you have a sympathetic GP who will listen to you tomorrow and help you sort out some of the health issues at least. You've got so much to deal with at the moment - don't wait till life gets better before you come back here, keep posting, there's always someone to listen. <'> Hope things start to improve very soon, K x Edited February 6, 2006 by Kathryn Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Malika Report post Posted February 7, 2006 Thanks Katherin and all , <'> <'> for cheering me up. I missed you all so much but I was unable to write things down, I feel sorry as well that quite few on the forum had a bad time and I was not there to give them a hug when most needed. I'll try to catch up with the poste. Baddad: I have absolutely nothing useful to say, but please accept my very VERY best wishes. I hope things get better for you soon Thanks for your support it is very useful indeed... <'> Take care all. <'> <'> Malika. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Brook Report post Posted February 7, 2006 Thanks Katherin and all , <'> <'> for cheering me up. I missed you all so much but I was unable to write things down, I feel sorry as well that quite few on the forum had a bad time and I was not there to give them a hug when most needed. I'll try to catch up with the poste. Baddad: Thanks for your support it is very useful indeed... <'> Take care all. <'> <'> Malika. Malika, I think you have enough to deal with at the moment, so dont worry about not supporting others at this time, it's you that needs some support right now. <'> <'> I hope things start to look up for you all soon, it sounds like you deserve some brighter days. <'> Brook Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Carol Report post Posted February 7, 2006 ggod grief - what an amount of stuff to have to deal with at the same time - my heart really went out to you when I was reading it - just wanted to say (((((((((big hugs)))))))) & thinking of you. Carol Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lorryw Report post Posted February 7, 2006 Hello Malika So sorry you are having such a terrible time and I hope things improve soon. With regards to your problems with the housing association have you been in touch with the housing charity Shelter? You can find them at www.shelter.org.uk. it may be worth having a word. Take care Loraine xx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Malika Report post Posted February 7, 2006 Thank you so much to all of you, your support is unvaluable. <'> Brook you are right but at the same time part of me feels better when I can give some comfort to who needs it. This afternoon I just spent 40 mns at the phone with the OT manager from the CDT (children developemental team) to try to explain that H has sensory motor integretion problems not that he beleived me, he said there were no need to go around the world to complain about the OT assessment refering to me contacting my GP and calling the family mental health unit to explain that the OT assessment was not complete, but he seemed very worried when I told him that H new peadiatrician found that H had balance pbs, it was clear to me thet he was not sure that I was wrong but just trying to discourage me going further. Beside I have completed some questionaire about H sensory pbs thinking it was sent by the OT manager but I found out that it was sent by the family mental health unit, and the OT manager is so annoyed about it because they requested him to performe a full assessment with H. Tomorow he is going to see the SENCO in H school who today (for once) stop ignoring me and was ever so helpful... I wonder what is going on? Anyway I gave the Senco some article about sensory issue where I hilighted what I could observe in H, asking her to show it to the OT manager. Once again wait and see. My GP this morning ask me to have a blood test and gave me some paper about depression and ask me to see the mental health adviser to discuss my difficuties I bet I'll need a double appointment.... May be at last something will start moving..... Thanks again to all of you and I'll keep you posted. Malika. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Flora Report post Posted February 7, 2006 Malika <'> <'> <'> <'> So sorry to read of all the things that are going wrong for you; but hopefully you've got some of it on track for going right now ?? Take care, Lauren XXX <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest hallyscomet Report post Posted February 8, 2006 Sorry Malika that all this is happening to you. <'> <'> <'> I will PM you, <'> <'> Hailey Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Malika Report post Posted February 10, 2006 Hi Haley <'> <'> and all <'> <'> Thanks for your PM I will answer you this week-end there are quite few things I would like to explain only one aspect is that the housing problem in the UK is huge and even worst in London . As for school and OT things are not moving much and because H then now my daughter got unwell and had to stay home I was not really able to achieve much and now half term and everything will be on stand by for another week.... Take care all. Malika. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Malika Report post Posted February 12, 2006 Hi to all <'> I thought at least share with you the first good news of the year...we finaly manage to buy another car very nice even if quite old and we had our first family outing... which was a kind of disaster H did not cope at all well but we all stay calm... <'> Malika. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest hallyscomet Report post Posted February 12, 2006 Hi Malika, It is lovely to see you back on here, we did miss you. Hope thing settle down. One thing at a time though <'> <'> got to put yourself first sometimes Best wishes Hailey <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
