Daisy and Higher Education

[DaisyFulkirk]

I would quite like to be able to have my profile saying my 'approximate' age without revealing exact date, like for instance to be able to select 1985 as birth year and leave the rest blank, but the forum doesn't seem to be able to allow this.

 

Is this a choice that has been made by moderators/admin or is it just an inherent forum blip feature?

 

Just... curious, really. If the former, why?

Edited February 23, 2006 by DaisyFulkirk

[Paula]

Reading what Daisyfulkirk as written as her signiture has given me hope for the future for my son.

 

Thankyou.

[DaisyFulkirk]

Reading what Daisyfulkirk as written as her signiture has given me hope for the future for my son.

 

Thankyou.

 

Thank you, Paula, it is just the main facts about me that are relevant to the ASD forum, really. "Nom de web" means that Daisy Fulkirk is not my real name, it is just a name I am using on the internet, like a nom de plume being a name a book author writes under that isn't their real name.

[stressed out mum]

Hi Daisyfulkirk

 

Might be a stupid question but do you get extra time to finish your degree?

[DaisyFulkirk]

Hi stressed out mum

 

I am not having extra time to do my degree because I am 'just about' keeping up but one of my friends is having a year extra so that she did the first two years with the same group but then has two years for her dissertation because it's hard for her to write fast and she needs longer for reading and things. I do have extra time to do the assignments (coursework) because if my learning support tutor isn't there then I can't do it, so I don't really have deadlines like the other students do. I am also doing some of my assignments as 'viva voce', which means talking instead of writing, I tell my professor about the subject and then he asks some questions and that's instead of some essays, my longest ones are 2000 words but other students have 4500 word ones.

 

My learning support tutor helps me with the reading by photocopying the relevant bits so I don't have to work through whole books looking for the right information, and then we plan my essays by breaking them up into bits of 200 words and we talk about what I need to write in each bit and write down some notes. If I am running out of time she will sit with me in the library and help me to get my essay done by reminding me to focus and what I am going to write for each bit, but otherwise she just reads it and helps me to get the grammar right and check for colloquialisms (that means 'slang' words) which I'm not very good at picking out, like saying 'kids' instead of 'children'.

 

Thats the good thing about degrees really, universities and colleges make their own rules much more than schools do so theres a lot more potential to adjust things to how you need, as long as someone's willing to help. I had one member of staff, horrid lady said that I was "right at the edge" of what you can have doing a degree, but well I'm doing it aren't I so she was talking rubbish. Also Disabled Students Allowance is actually a lot more generous than a statement or anything and helps you get all sorted out with note-taker support for lectures and computers and transport costs too if its hard for you to get the bus or you might get lost if you walked or anything.

 

Did that answer your question properly?

 

Daisy

[Kathryn]

Daisy,

 

It's really interesting to hear of your experiences in highter education and how well you are supported. It shows what is possible and gives me hope that my autistic daughter, now 17, will one day be able to do something like this too, if she wants to.

 

Kathryn

[stressed out mum]

Hi Daisyfulkirk

 

Thankyou yes you answered everything to the full

 

The only other question (if you don't mind) is did you have a statement at school?

 

My son is only twelve and doesn't have a statement. Although it is a long way off I wonder if he would get the same support if he wanted to carry on studying.

[DaisyFulkirk]

Daisy,

 

It's really interesting to hear of your experiences in highter education and how well you are supported. It shows what is possible and gives me hope that my autistic daughter, now 17, will one day be able to do something like this too, if she wants to.

 

Kathryn

 

Hi Daisyfulkirk

 

Thankyou yes you answered everything to the full

 

The only other question (if you don't mind) is did you have a statement at school?

 

My son is only twelve and doesn't have a statement. Although it is a long way off I wonder if he would get the same support if he wanted to carry on studying.

 

 

Hi Kathryn, hi Stressed out Mum

 

I think theres two things to it really: one thing is being good enough at a subject to do it at university, which is something lots of autistic people can do; I'm a very 'maths' person, I have an autistic friend doing physics too and one doing music, like me - I could have done maths but I wasn't ever really organised enough with homework so I didn't get very good maths A levels. The other thing is just being 'brave' enough to go through with it all and be away from home and cope with the really big change that is actually leaving school and going somewhere else... I had a really hard time with that change, worse cos we were still figuring out my support needs (its all suddenly a lot more obvious when you haven't got your mum there) and also because I was in a shared flat in a hall of residence and I think its fair to say that most (all?) autistic young people wouldn't get on too well with doing that.

 

I didn't have a statement at school, I can't remember it ever really being discussed but I was withdrawn from some lessons (technology, which I didn't like anyway) for learning skills support and a general chance to 'catch up' with homework and stuff in a 'special needs session', I had a special tutor for my english GCSE because I wasn't learning so well in the main english lessons (28 noisy girls and a teacher who doesn't understand about quiet), most of my support for my A levels was from my parents and one amazingly dedicated teacher, but its completely different when you go to university, they will need at some point to see some 'evidence' of being autistic (clinical/educational psychologists report) but they completely take it from you what you need. Funnily enough I have noticed that the biggest oldest universities like Cambridge and Oxford are actually a lot more enlightened about autism and ASDs than some of the 'new' ones, which I thought might be the other way round, but I suppose they have had hundreds and hundreds of years to notice that autistic and other disabled students are still good students.

 

Kathryn if your daughter is thinking about going to university she can ask me things if she wants, obviously its different for everyone but it made me feel better knowing someone else had already done the whole applying and exams nightmare.

 

Daisy

[stressed out mum]

That's great Daisy

 

I am sure that there is something out there of interest for my son, haven't found it yet

 

It's been interesting to speak to you and as Kathryn says it gives us hope for our own children.

 

I am sure you will continue to florish in whatever you do.

Edited February 23, 2006 by stressed out mum

[Kathryn]

Thanks Daisy. She or I may well want to ask you things. It's useful to know someone like you who has been through the system and is doing well.

 

My daughter didn't cope very well at school - long story, but she left school without taking any exams and has just started at the local college after more than a year without any education. She is slowly getting her confidence back and starting to think about future possibilities. She'll need a lot of support if she's going to study and do exams. Whether she ends up at university or not, and I have a completely open mind about that, I think like many autistic people, she would thrive in an environment where she can focus on her particular interests. Schools, particularly large comprehensives are geared to producing all rounders and she just didn't fit into that environment.

[DaisyProudfoot]

Mods ... would be possible to post this in Education as well ... it's very informative for anyone wishing to go onto further education and it will get lost in the techie area methinks.

[phasmid]

Daisy I can move it there but I cannot leave it here as well. If you're happy with that I'll move it straight away.

 

Phas

 

Added: Actually that should read for Daisy Fulkirk (sorry)

Edited February 22, 2006 by phasmid

[phasmid]

Thanks to both Daisies, Proudfoot and Fulkirk. For suggesting and allowing the move.

 

I hope this is of use to many of the forum users who, like me, have a child fast approaching the end of compulsory school age and are wondering just what can happen next.

[Kathryn]

You're right, this is more appropriate in the education section. There's so much useful information here. Can I suggest remaming the topic to reflect what it's about i.e. Higher education? Would you be happy with that, DaisyFulkirk, seeing that you started the thread?

 

Kathryn

[helenl53]

I have just picked up this thread.

 

Daisy, I am really pleased to hear about your experience. Although my son is only ten I need to think about his future now.

 

I like your posting - you have made it very easy for a parent to understand.

 

Thanks

 

HelenL

[Valiant_Skylark]

Hi Daisy,

 

May I also say how interesting (and inspiring) reading your posts has been. Perhaps, if you have the time, you could share more of your experiences with coping with Higher Education with us?

 

In the meantime, good luck with the studies!

 

VS xx

[Nemesis]

I hope this is of use to many of the forum users who, like me, have a child fast approaching the end of compulsory school age and are wondering just what can happen next.

Absolutely

Thanks for sharing your experiences Daisy. I do wonder if my son will be able to cope living away at university and it's really inspiring to read how well you've done.

Thanks,

Nemesis.

[Canopus]

I do wonder if my son will be able to cope living away at university and it's really inspiring to read how well you've done.

 

Is there a university within travelling distance that offers a suitable course? Don't forget the Open University. I have been informed by several OU graduates that the service provided by the OU is first class and it is an overlooked and underrated institution by 18 year olds.

 

I lived away whilst at university and I wouldn't do it again.

[Nemesis]

Hi Canopus,

I've studied with the OU myself and I think they're fantastic but I also think my son would need more day to day input and supervision than you get with the OU. There is a decent university about 15 miles away so there are certainly options when the time comes. He has to do his work experience soon so it'll be interesting to see how he manages that.

Nemesis

[Canopus]

What subject does he want to study?

[DaisyFulkirk]

I think if you can handle it at all that living at university is a really good thing to do, actually leaving home the first time was INCREDIBLY traumatic and I was very very homesick for my first term, but I honestly think if I hadn't gone away then I would never have had a chance to leave home and be independant. I would want to make it smoother for someone else who was going to do it, it wasn't so much 'transition' for me as just something quite abrupt which I found quite distressing (still have a scar on my knuckle to prove it) and because a lot of my support needs weren't really known when I started for example that I could - can - help to make quite a good meal but need to be supervised and that if someone doesn't remind me my hair doesn't get washed, so I had quite a hard first half year with a lot of time spent in a big mess but I am quite unusual because I was late diagnosed and am very good at talking which masks a lot of other things, especially for people who are only seeing me for a short time like the doctor.

 

Once I started getting things sorted out with the help of some good friends who know about how to get support and some suggestions from the NAS it has been quite smooth, and now I am living on my own I'm a lot happier because I didn't like sharing a kitchen and corridor with other people, they were always too noisy.

 

I use the student's union at lunchtime rather than in the evenings because it is quiet then, there are just a few people there and you can have some food and read the newspaper.

 

Going to see it a lot of times before I went there really helped, I went and stayed the night in the hall of residence and tried out the canteen food and said hello to some of the staff that I have a lot of dealing with (welfare officer, administration ladies, support tutor).

[Nemesis]

Hi Daisy,

I am quite unusual because I was late diagnosed and am very good at talking which masks a lot of other things, especially for people who are only seeing me for a short time like the doctor.

This describes my son perfectly. Do you mind me asking how old you were when you were diagnosed?

You sound like a very courageous young lady if you don't mind me saying so

It's really interesting to read about the sort of support that you have to make living at uni workable for you. TBH I hadn't even begun to think about what DS would need but I'm sure you're right that it would be better for him to be independent at uni if possible. The idea of familiarising yourself first is a good one. My son's SENCO suggested yesterday that he should go to his work experience placement maybe once a fortnight to get to know people etc before he actually does the placement.

 

Canopus,

I think it'll be something to do with computers For a long time he said he wanted to be a NASA scientist but that seems to have fallen by the wayside. He's hoping to do his work experience placement in computing with a major bank who have their headquarters near here.

 

Nemesis

[Emma3]

Hi Daisy

Just feel inspired, just gives us parnets hope that our youngsters have a chance. Keep us informed of how your doing. How do your parents feel about you being away from home?

[Gordie]

I would quite like to be able to have my profile saying my 'approximate' age without revealing exact date, like for instance to be able to select 1985 as birth year and leave the rest blank, but the forum doesn't seem to be able to allow this.

 

Is this a choice that has been made by moderators/admin or is it just an inherent forum blip feature?

 

Just... curious, really. If the former, why?

Just going waaaaaaaaaaay back to the techie aspect of this thread (without reading the rest of the thread), upon trying to enter only my birth year, leaving the rest blank, I get the error:

"Either complete all the birthdate fields, or leave them all blank - we cannot process partial birthdates"

... which suggests it's an aspect of the software for all forums of this format, not just our forum. I'd say it's fixed like this by the people that made the software, and the admins/mods here can't do anything about it.

 

James

[DaisyFulkirk]

Hi Daisy,

 

This describes my son perfectly. Do you mind me asking how old you were when you were diagnosed?

 

Hi Nemesis. I was identified as having problems with 'motivation' and independant working when I was four, just at school, and gradually had things about high IQ, fast reading, socially isolated added through primary school. A friend's parent nearly-correctly thought I was dyspraxic at 11, I was diagnosed with depression two years later and realised on my own at 15 that I was autistic. I got my formal diagnosis when I was 18 and a half, once I'd left home and started my degree, although my mum knew before that - she studied psychology and has worked as a music therapist with autistic children, before I came along. I wish I'd been diagnosed earlier - I did get some good help but really messed up my A levels for instance and I think that could have been avoided.

 

Hi Daisy

Just feel inspired, just gives us parnets hope that our youngsters have a chance. Keep us informed of how your doing. How do your parents feel about you being away from home?

 

Hi Emma, I think my mum and dad are glad that I have left home, maybe worried as well but mostly glad, especially now that I'm all sorted out and OK. I know my mum would like me to do more things on my own and not have so much help, but we have "agreed to disagree" on that one and don't really talk about it. One of my younger sisters (18 now, youngest one is 15) has left home and gone away to university too, and that makes me sad because it makes the difference so much more obvious, she's running around making millions of friends and doing lots of new things. Before there was no-one for me to be compared with.

 

I'd say it's fixed like this by the people that made the software, and the admins/mods here can't do anything about it.

 

James

 

That's what I thought too, but I wasn't sure. Thankyou for checking for me James!