Flora

Hi barb Welcome to the forum... you're definitely in the right place Flora

bid, does that mean your ballet dancing days are over ? Seriously, sounds very painful! That hip might be sore tomorrow. Floz

I was thinking that bid Although on the question of electricity, a friend of my ex husband who is OUR age once told me that he his parents didn't get electricity until he was 15. Mind you, he grew up on a sheep farm in the welsh valleys so perhaps that explains it

Did a big boy do it and run away??? (variation of a Billy Connoly joke) Flozza

You can still get all those things on the list (mighty white might come under a different name though... something like best of both). We often used to get the microwave popcorn but we recently had a batch where the 'butter' (or the awful chemical imitation they add) had 'gone off' and my microwave is now unuseable because I can't get rid of the smell.... not that I used it much anyway... only for the popcorn ! I used to love that boil in the bag fish but the mere thought of it now makes me feel ill. I wonder how many of you out there who had their youth in the 80's ever remembers rolling in from the pub with the munchies and eating primula cheese straight out of the tube because you'd run out of bread? Flora

My son who is 14 frequently has days when he can't/won't speak. His consultant once suggested he was 'selectively mute'. However, I'm not so sure because he doesn't appear to be able to control this and the word 'selective' suggests that he is chosing not to speak and I'm not so sure he has that much control over it. Sometimes when he's like this I've tried to encourage him to answer my questions etc, and when he does it just comes out as a inaudible whisper. It's very puzzling. Flora

Hiya, What a nightmare! First thing I would say is that you need to get him home from your mum's and don't send him back. That may sound extreme, but she doesn't sound particularly helpful or supportive anyway (apart from the respite value, which loses it's value when someone is that controlling). It's fine for Grandparents to spoil their grandkids, and there's nothing wrong with having a different set of rules in the two different environments; however if they than carry that forward to saying 'I will take him off your hands', then a very specific boundary has been crossed. He's your son, he lives with you, and he at least needs to get that message loud and clear. You risk falling out with your mum over this but tbh she isn't doing you any favours and she needs to know where the boundaries are, whether she likes it or not. The other thing, when you do get him home, is for you to devise some way of getting control. A few posts in this thread already describe examples of this so I won't go into specifics on that again. As for this: Marcus is his son too... so my answer to this would be; fine, don't come, and Marcus can stay at home with you while me and the littlies have a nice holiday Hope you can get this all sorted. It may take time, but it will be well worth it. First thing is though, go get him from the Grandparents and get him home! He's your son, and at aged 12 you own the air he breathes (sounds harsh but hey that's the message he needs to get). Flora <'>

Hi Sport I'm absolutely certain the SS don't take children into care because of an accident in the park! Unless there's more to the story, I'm sure you've got nothing to worry about. If the parents have reported the incident to SS then I think they have to come and visit you and your son, but unless there's more to this story than it being an accident, I can't imagine that it would go further than a visit. I agree with Suze re the 8 yo. He should have been supervised by his parents, and clearly at the point of being on the swing and the subsequent accident, he wasn't or if he was then why didn't they stop him being pushed before it got to that stage? Flora

Hi Ani and welcome to the forum Flora

I'm sure I've posted about this before, either that or I'm having a very strong 'deja vu'. I've been to that swedish shop today (the one that ryhmes with idea What is it about that place? It's a Tuesday, so I expected it to be relatively quiet. But no, whole families, treating the place like a theme park! Awful. I couldn't think straight. Still got some very interesting bits and pieces, but why do people want to go there for a day out? Floz

Oh heck it's one of those really confusing situations! If you say something, then you risk making an assumption about something that isn't there, but if you don't say something and he makes a move then you're in a compromising situation! Tally, lots of people put hugs and kisses at the end of emails, messages etc... quite often it doesn't mean anything other than adding friendliness to the tone of an email. Having said all of that, just to be certain, I think bid's advice is spot on. Also... quite agree about the money. Never a borrower or a lender be (unless it's a bank!). Flora

Me too!!! However, the ring itself needs adjusting about half an inch counter clockwise Warren you should take those china things to the Antiques Road Show If nothing else, it would make a nice little story when they ask you where you got them! Flo'

He comes accross as a really lovely young man Hope you can get some support from Prospects. I'd never heard of them until I read the article. Flora

I posted this link over a year ago to show that Bill's youtube account was the 8th item on page one of google... He's now one of the ONLY items on page one of google! (well when you type in his youtube name) Anyone with Sonic/mario etc fans in their household might enjoy some the videos he's made (he uses windows movie maker). He's got quite a following on youtube now and also has 'director' status as a youtube movie maker I've changed the link because the google page keeps changing.... here's a link to some of his youtube videos and games... he uses Snagit, games factory, and some other stuff (can't remember what). Will defo be of interest to some kids who are into video games (of the non-violent variety Bill's youtube stuff Flo'

Hope you're both having a fab holiday. Flo'

Tally. Someone gave me a local London newspaper the other day because there was a young man in there with AS who'd written an article. He mentions 'Prospects', an organisation that finds work placements for people with ASD, and they also help to educate your employer and colleagues about AS. You've probably already heard of them and contacted them, but just incase you hadn't I thought I'd mention them. Flo'

how interesting. I've noticed my son does that with drinks Lucas, he will take a couple of sips first, then he'll gulp it back really quickly. Also, while I haven't really thought much about it, I do this with food at times. I can be really enjoying a meal and tucking into it, then suddenly feel like if I eat another mouthfull I'm going to be sick. I don't actually feel nauseaus, just feel like I would choke and throw up. Flora

Darky this is absolutely true. When I went to tribunal back in Febuary the panel chatted to Bill prior to the hearing starting. They made it quite clear that they were only interested in what he is like now not what he had been like when he was last in school almost a year before. It was very fortunate that I'd always cooperated with the LEA and we had a very long paper trail illustrating so; the panel were very aware of that and as such more or less told one of my LEA's witnessess that he'd had enough opportunity to work with Bill in the past and they could see nothing to suggest that he wouldn't make as much a mess of it in the future as he had previously. One thing my solicitor told me months before the hearing was 'give them enough rope and they will hang themselves'.... this proved to be so true, which is why I would urge Jsmum to go along with the LEA right up to the day of the tribunal, not despite the fact she believes the placement will fail, but because of it Flora

Sounds fab Mel. Hope your trip to Norfolk is just as good. Flo'

and invented by Edward Lear not Lewis Caroll. I think or have I missed a joke????

baddad, Your description of frying an egg after the pub is (in my extremely unqualified opinion!) is a work of near (if not actual) comic genius. I'm sat here with a cuppa after struggling through the rain and crying with laughter. Floz

Hiya Dianne I would say definately let him go. You can still negotiate with the school over what strategies are implemented and how. They are much more likely to listen to you if your son is actually attending; otherwise his non-attendance will be their focus, and you could get into trouble for keeping him off particularly as he has said he wants to go. If things continue to go awry because the school aren't supporting him properly then it's better to cover your back by letting it be properly witnessed and documented before doing anything too drastic. Good luck Flora <'>

had a lovely relaxing time in IOW (been back since thursday obviously!). Came back to a minor crisis with Bill (won't bore you all with the details) but it had a lot to do with the fact that during his week with his dad he didn't have a single prozac! Missed all of them. As a result we have had to cancel our Newcastle trip:( . IOW is lovely; I'm off there again next week... on my own this time! 4 days in solitude (for the first time in 16 years!)... can't wait. Flora

My son used to strip off too.... he doesn't now... in fact I have trouble getting him to remove his clothes just to put pj's on or to have a shower!!!! Also, can I assure you all that most kids do grow out of this.... my mum was just telling me the other day that I frequently stripped off outside and she used to have the neighbours calling over the fence 'margaret... she's doing it again' and she'd look out of the window to see my dancing naked in the garden I definately don't do it now Flo'

It sounds like an accident. And what's more, who was supervising the 8 year old??? Surely the people who were supervising the 8 yo had just as much (or more) responsibility to keep him safe! Flora