Flora

Kathryn that's great news. Well done to L, and particularly well done for doing such good work when she's not enjoying the course! Flora

Clare, ... I know how frustrating it can be when you want answers and can't get to talk to the poeple who can give you them Hopefully you'll have better luck tomorrow. I've sent you a pm <'> Flora X

OMG. If I thought I was ill yesterday, that had nothing on today. Yesterday I took so many pills trying to get rid of my sore throat and to get my voice back that I think I must have damaged the lining of my stomach, and spent the whole day in agony and periodically throwing up How stupid can you get? My voice has come back a bit, still very croaky but at least I can speak now. I haven't eaten a thing for two days but I'm too scared to eat in case I throw up again Ah well. Hopefully tomorrow I'll be well again. Flo'

I've got Bill's first annual review on Tuesday and I've come down with a sore throat/laryngitis and can't speak at all . I can't make any sounds nor even whisper How on earth am I going to sit through a review meeting with no voice!! I've found some anti-biotics in the cupboard which I've started to take, I'm swallowing spoonfulls of manuka honey; does anyone know of any good remedies (apart from the two mentioned) to get my voice back by Tuesday??? Flora

Hi Loubee It does sound familiar, but you really don't have to put up with behaviour like that. My son has been through some extremely stressful times but whenever he showed signs of taking it out on me or his brother and sister I would really put my foot down. No matter what he's going through or how stressed he feels, it's really important that you don't allow your son to treat you like this. Imagine this; if he thinks he can get away with treating you like this when he's 7, what is he going to be like when he's a teenager? I'm not suggesting you don't show sympathy for his stress, but you also need for him to learn that it's also not an excuse to treat others badly. Good luck! Flora

Flora used to be a r/l nic-name for me. (in fact a friend of mine still calls me Flora!). I once did some agency nursing in london and went up to the reception in theatre and the receptionist misunderstood me when I told her who I was and went on the theatre tannoy announcing 'Flora Mason is here from the agency'... ALL day the staff were calling me Flora, and I even had a badge with my name on saying 'Flora' (I was too embarrassed to tell them my name wasn't Flora!!!) It was funny at the time!!! My avatar was made by a member who doesn't come here anymore (and then embellished by baddad for Christmas a couple of years ago)... the pole dancing is because I got drunk once and pole danced on the wooden beams in our local pub Flora

How intersting. My dd did OM&M last term for English, and she had to write about one of the characters and decided in her essay that he was 'probably autistic' and ended up getting an A*. I'd be interested if there is a connection with someone he knew, so if you find out let me know!!! Flo'

I was thinking the same thing. I miss her on the forum. Flora

Hi Suze <'> oh dear really hope he's ok, and hope you're ok too <'> Bill was very depressed for a long time... he was diagnosed by a CAMHs consultant. He was offered medication (citalopran sp??) and a course of CBT initially. Neither of those had any long term benefits as his depression was found to be caused by constant struggling with sensory difficulties within school (he just couldn't concentrate and eventually just ran out of steam). He's now on prozac and this has helped enormously. Hope your son gets seen soon and a solution found <'> (nobody ever suggested bi-polar... also I never really suspected it because Bill never had any ups... only constant downs.... is your son up and down Suze? has anyone suggested it might he might be bi-polar?) Floz <'> xxxxx

I'm sure that together we could create a coffee table type book on 'humerous' IEP's. Ben had one a couple of years ago which said something like: 'To achieve age appropriate levels in numeracy and literacy' ... That was it... no indication of HOW !! Flora

Hi Stardust <'> You know my thoughts on this so I won't go into huge detail Suffice to say, the only reason the LEA are offering this school is because they have weighed up the evidence and see that it's overwhelmingly in your favour, so they've come up with a cheaper alternative. The fact is that it isn't a viable alternative at all and I don't think you'll have any difficulty in proving that. This is exactly what my LEA did very close to my hearing, and tbh the school they offered was far more suitable (on paper) than the one your LEA are offering so just gather your evidence and save it for the hearing Flora

Hi Caroline, This is what I was saying in an earlier post; if a child is excluded for something as serious as kicking a teacher then it's up to the parents to support the sanction and reinforce the message by not allowing the child to have fun on their 'day off'. Flora

Sorry Lizzie, I think my post has upset you and it wasn't meant to. I understand where you're coming from when you say that excluding a child who doesn't want to be there isn't going to viewed by that child as a punishment; however, the parents can make it so by supporting the exclusion and making sure the day isn't spent having fun. Let me explain with an experience with my own son; he has always hated school, and when he started his special school last term he hated that too. The reasons he hated it weren't the same as why he'd hated mainstream, suffice to say he just didn't want to go! I told him if he carried on not cooperating etc that there was a real risk he'd lose his place at the school because the placement had failed. His eyes lit up when I said this, so I followed it up with an explanation of how much his life at home would change if he had to be home educated as a result of this placement failing. He didn't like the sound of that to the extent that his attitude towards this new school changed virtually over night. Concluding that if a child's day at home due to an exclusion is devoid of any kind of reward (perceived or otherwise) then they will quickly learn to view that exclusion as a punishment they'd prefer to avoid! Flora

I have to say I'm with the secondary school here too. Violence, whatever the reason or underlying difficulty, should always be dealt with. Every person, regardless of their SEN should be taught not to use violent behaviour, no matter what the cause of the outburst is. What happens when that child becomes a teenager? Bigger feet, bigger legs, bigger kick? I don't think there is a single situation that I can think of when the use of violence shoult not trigger a disciplinary consequence. Even for those with severe learning difficulties sanctions appropirate to the child's cognitive ability can be used. Flora ps... even special schools, who are well prepared for all sorts of behaviour, will still impose sanctions

Bill's hair is really long now (almost as long as mine except that he has tight curls so it looks shorter). He has refused to have it cut for 18 months and seems to absolutely savour the fact that 'grown ups' don't like it! He was once chuffed to bits when some 'chavs' were shouting 'oi, affro dude' at him He washes it every other day (reluctantly) but doesn't brush it and I was starting to worry about it turning into dredlocks This week I decided to bribe him to have it cut at half term. I asked him what he would like as a bribe to have his hair cut and he gave me a withering side long look and said 'There isn't enough money in the world.... nice try though' ... this was said with the smuggest look I've ever seen on anybody's face EVER. I got my own back tonight though after he'd been in the shower and took a brush to it before he dried it Cheeky b00gar! Floz

SG, Not so sure about this. Apparently I used to toe walk but I don't anymore (well not very often... I do when I'm nervous or excited!); my son used to toe walk and doesn't appear to anymore, although his trousers are so long that I don't think I've seen his feet for a few years so he may well still do it for all I know! I would think that people can grow out of it, but whether everyone grows out of it I don't know Flora

I'm at a bit of an advantage here in that I know the school and the area. One of the busiest roads in the city splits the two sites and there are also lots of undesirables hanging about near that underpass!!! I wouldn't have been happy if this had been my son and no planning had been involved, (ie discussions on how to deal with any potential problems etc). Flora

Pingu, great to see you back, it's been a long long time. Looking forward to catching up etc. Flora <'>

I think it depends very much on the personality of the child and the presence of co-morbids, if any. My eldest ds found mainstream secondary a nightmare and is now in a specialist AS school; however this was purely down to severe sensory issues. My youngest son who is also on the spectrum but with no apparent co-morbids is doing absolutely fine, in fact possitively thriving, in mainstream secondary school. Flora

ABSOLUTELY BLIMMIN' FANTASTIC!!!!! Flozza

Eh bah goom suze us northerners do come in for some stick.... just as well we're a good natured bunch! I was reading in the paper this morning that the Filipino Embassy has complained about Harry Enfield and Paul Whitehouse show which portrayed a toff and his neighbour trying to mate their pet northerner with a Filipino maid! There was a lot of guff about how it was insulting to Filipinos but nothing about it being insulting to northerners I think it's because we are impervious Ecky thump, I love a bit of black pudding with my reeeeeeal butta and reeal bread Flozzie xx

Clare, as you know I'm Will be waiting with baited breath for the outcome. I haven't spoken to Bill the past couple of days (he doesn't bother ringing me anymore ). Most of you ds's visit will have gone over his head because he really is on planet Bill most of the time but hopefully today will have gone well. Flora

Yes! I have 3 kids, two on the spectrum. I'm very lucky though because I have an enormous amount of support from my mum. My kids also see their dad very regularly. It was much harder when they were younger. Mine are 16, 14 and 11 now and life is so much easier in comparison to what it was a few years ago. Not easy, but easier. Flora

Karen <'> Try to switch off from it all for a while... by that I mean take some days out and just 'be'. It's been a long struggle to get this answer and you're probably exhausted. Flora

That's spooky that is!!!! Flo'