TylersMum

I went to Legoland week before last and they offer 2 days for 1 on the tickets. We paid for the 2 kids, ds ASD and dd NT, and because of ds's ASD (with proof) we only paid for the 2 kids and 1 adult. The tickets are valid for a second visit, free of charge, between 5th September and 16th October, but we won't be able to get there between those dates. If anyone wants these tickets - for 2 adults and 2 kids - they are very welcome. Send me a PM with your address and I'll put them in the post Hope this posting is allowed

Tyler has special needs trampolining lessons every Monday - been really good for his gross motor skills, and his confidence! and I get to talk to my sister for an hour, in blissful peace....

My moan is about moving bl**dy house.... We moved out last Friday (12th) and have just given the keys in today so the old house is completely empty but the new house is cardboard box city. Hubby doesn't paint or put furniture together so I do all that, he HAS done all the heavy stuff, but I'm knackered yet am back at work tomorrow. Tyler has a trampolining lesson straight after work then the new sofas are being delivered. In between I will have to cook dinner and attempt unpacking some more boxes - how did I accumulate all this cr*p???!!!!! Here's to at least a month of organised (ish) chaos, during which ds starts his new special school - yippeeeeeeeeeeee Thanks for listening! <'>

Just thought I'd add something to this post - about a friend who has an 11 year old ASD boy. She was having her monthly visitor and was in the bathroom organising herself when he barged in. He wasn't shocked because she had explained to him about womens cycles etc however, they had a 1 year old female dog who had just been in season. Her son proudly announced to the milkman the next morning that his Mum was currently 'in season'.

I had this 3 weeks ago - I KNEW he had ASD, it was the best possible outcome, but I fell apart when I heard the diagnosis said for the first time. I shocked myself at my reaction. He is still the same child he was yesterday, you are just better informed to help him now <'>

Blue, My heart goes out to you. Some of these so-called 'professionals'.... I wrote a letter of complaint to the hospital this week at the way one of their doctors treated my ASD son. He was checking his vision, which is very poor, and because Tyler got stressed out because he hadn't been in that consultation room before, or seen that doctor before, this consultant felt he could grip Tylers chin (quite hard) and shout at him to open his eyes. I had already told him Tylers has ASD but this guy was stone cold, nothing wamr about him at all. I had to do something, and writing a very strongly worded complaint made me feel better. Even if you complain about the insinuation, you might feel better for taking some action? If you don't want to do that, put the stupid sods comments out of your mind. The very fact that you are so upset demonstrates how much you love your son - they don't know YOU, or your son. <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'>

It does seem to run in families in boys then, as a generalism. Sorry for my ignorance, what is NT?

I'm really pleased to have found this posting, I'll tell you why. My son has ASD, he is nearly five, but my 3.5 year old daughter doesn't. My Husband and I always planned to have more children but need to understand what the risks are in terms of another child with ASD or something similar. Our decision wouldn't obviously be based solely upon these facts but we want to make sure we can give enough time and attention to the kids we have already got before we decide to have another child who, potentially, may have special needs like our son. Any suggestions on where we can find out more???

Isn't it tantamount to discrimination? This is the very thing that concerns me most about my son's future. Why are people so judgemental? I'm overweight and get judged for that, my son has autism and gets judged for that, my father-in-law swears a LOT and gets judged for that (but doesn't seem to care!), this society is all about judgement and I wish I could change that. As much as I try NOT to judge, it is hard sometimes. I saw a mum in tesco's a few weeks ago, smacking her child a LOT, and HARD - I was mortified and instantly judged her. My thoughts as a mother with an autistic child was that maybe her son wasn't being really naughty, but could be autistic, or he could just be very naughty, or he could have ADHD, or she could be a bad mother - not my place to know or decide but I DID judge her and I hated myself for that. Truly, I think if there IS a way to be superior, it is brought about by NOT being judgemental. Its a tough one though

Glad this has all panned out with everyone. Dog chewed up one of the badges yesterday - is that a sign??

Hi - I'm off to Legoland on Thursday - I have already emailed them and within an hour I had this response: "Dear Guest, Thank you for your recent email of enquiry. In answer to your question, your son would pay the full price of �22 however one adult could go in free as a carer on production of some form of documentation. LEGOLAND Windsor offers an exit pass system, available to guests who have a disability or special need that prevents them from being able to wait in a queue line comfortably and has difficulty in understanding the concept of queuing, for example autism. Please proceed to guest services on arrival at the park with documentation. The documentation required is anything from a doctor, health organisation, educational psychologist, etc. that states the nature of the needs; a blue badge or Disability Living Allowance will not suffice as they do state what the disability is. The child with special needs will receive a red stamp hand stamp and the rest of the party will receive a black hand stamp each. The exit passes can only be used if at least one of the red stamped children is riding. Up to three black stamped people can accompany each red stamped guest through the exit of the rides. I hope this has answered your query. If you need any further information please do not hesitate to contact me on either guest.services@legoland.co.uk or 01753 626319. We look forward to seeing you here at the park." I was quite impressed

Its the scariest thing, isn't it? I was so worried Tyler would react badly when we visited. I'm just hoping he doesn't cry more than me on the first day.... He has to wear a uniform too; and he has just got his new specs so will look very grown up, uh-oh, welling up already.....!!!

Just a quick note - the stuff I bought from Ebay are Buttons and More products!

Mine too My son is five at the end of Sept but has been accepted to a fab special school in Swindon. They specialise in ASD teaching techniques - he'll even get to go horse riding and swimming once a week, they have very small class sizes and 2 on site speech therapists. They are on the same campus at a mainstream and integrate the kids from mainstream into music lessons, play time and lunch. I think its great because it means the kids in the special school don't just mix with special needs kids, and it gives the mainstream kids a far better appreciation of kids in the special school. He also gets transport and they play fun but educational games on the bus. I took him for a visit and couldn't drag him away from the relaxation room!

Fair comment. And I think that it depends on how high/low functioning your child is, on how you manage them/yourself, and how you feel about other peoples views. The other thing is, these things can change over a course of time. I've noticed a lot of the postings say that people get used to ignoring the stares of others - I'm certainly not there yet. Not sure I'd put Tyler (or myself!) in a t-shirt but a badge seems to help both him and I, for the time being. I felt like I had started something (completely unintentional) that had made people a bit cross. I was so pleased to be able to be part of this site, I didn't want it to turn into some kind of unnecessary debate. I love being able to bounce things off other parents that understand and I don't want to detract from that. We are all involved with ASD/AS in some way, shape or form and this forum has already provided me with some much needed (and appreciated) support.

Thanks - I just felt really bad that I got it so wrong, in some other ASD parents views. I am still struggling BIG TIME with other peoples views of him. In Tesco's about a month ago, one cashier coughed loudly to attract the attention of 3 of her colleagues then nodded towards him, when Tyler was in full screaming fit mode and they all just stared at him like he was an alien, then scowled at me because I obviously couldn't control him. I was so cross that I didn't explain. I really felt she didn't deserve an explanation but for those who are a bit more sensitive, I just thought a badge might be helpful. On a slightly more sensible note, there is a great site http://www.kidsbands.co.uk/ which sells paper but unbreakable bands. I bought some of these, and they have fab funky designs, which the kids wear on their wrists (and I mean ANY kids!) and they have contact details on them. They don't come unstuck, you have to cut them off with scissors and they don't irritate my daughter who has sensitive skin. Such a 'peace of mind' product for days out, and mine love choosing which design (although it is usually the crocodile ones). Thought it might be nice to finish this posting off with something that might be useful

Just a final thought re: "Special" kids. Don't want to be controversial but my son IS special, as is my daughter. One has ASD and one doesn't but they are MY kids so whether the 'special' indicates special needs, or simply just special to me, is almost irrelevant. I'm seriously deflated now.

Sorry if I got anyone's back up. My son is VERY recently diagnosed and I think part of my acceptance of this whole thing is to try and protect him. I bought these items so that people don't stare and make me (and therefore him) feel worse. Totally take the point that it may encoruage people to pray on vulnerable kids and didn't consider that view before so thanks. I'm just trying to do the best by him - I've never known anyone with ASD or AS so am finding my feet slowly. Its also a weakness of mine that if something is not quite right, I throw money at it, and I guess thats part of what I've been doing. Sorry - didn't want to make waves.

Hi, I'm a newbie too. My son was diagnosed 3 weeks ago (he will be five in September), he is high functioning and I;ve been a member for a week. I have a really strong family/friends support network but feel much more supported since finding this site. I was in total denial for about 2 years (first suspected Autism at 2.5 years) so have only really come to terms with it in the last 6 months. Tyler is a wonderful little fella, very cuddly, likes kissing and has good speech skills but not in comparison to my daughter, aged 3.5. He has been accepted to a special school and has had a statement done but I had to fight for the special school. Part of my acceptance was the change in my own mind that a special school would be better for him. Before I accepted that he has ASD I was adamant that he had to go to mainstream because that was what "normal" kids did. Its tough - we've cried, worried and despaired but have also been elated, delighted and amazed at our wonderful son. If you need any support on a 121, feel free to email. mum2two@ntlworld.com

Isn't it funny the things they share with other ASD kids? We too have the american accent sometimes. I bought my son and my 3 year old (non ASD) daughter bubble machine guns the other day and the guy on the stall (in the middle of town!) was in hysterics at my son's appreciation of his "Bubblator" in full American twang.

Hi Tylers-Mum - There are 2 of us! Hence you have been called Nicki, thats me!!!! My Tyler is nearly 5. He was only diagnosed 3 weeks ago. Nice to meet you <'>

Seems to be the case. Tylers DOES do it more when he is watching telly so have asked stay-at-home to reduce his TV, although he doesn't watch that much anyway. Tyler also gets very obssessive with particular things. Initially it was Toy Story, the Casper, then Ice Age, then Incredibles, and he can watch a film once and regurgitate the entire film, word for word thereafter. He has started to relate passages from films to real life though, which I take as a good sign? He will take a situation, for example, when Bear in the Big Blue House does that 'whats that smell?' bit at the beginning, Tyler now smells me and asks what that smell is, then asks me if I have been eating breakfast, or drinking milk, or whatever he has recently seen me doing. Sometimes he screams then says sorry (as always) but comes up to me and says "I'm really rerally sorry Mummy, I love you" and I just melt.

Thats true - a lot of them aren't for charity, but they DO help raise awareness. Maybe some of us should start our own ebay shop and donte the proveeds to NAS. I'm currently doing a sponsored slim for NAS (and I NEED to do it too ) so am doing my bit!!!!!

Thanks so much for your replies. As I mentioned, I'm really new to all this and have discovered this site almost by chance (a nice chap who organises workshops told me about it) and I have sent the link home to show my Husband today. Just to know he isn't the only one is helping. His 3 year old sister seems to just accept that is how Tyler is, but does sometimes tell him to stop screaming or tell him off (she can be VERY bossy!) and sometimes he does stop for a few hours. It doesn't seem to be triggered by being out of his depth or upset, he just seems to enjoy it. Especially though when he is watching TV or in the garden. One of the helpful things his psychologist said to us was that when he is behaving this way, he isn't being naughty, he is just being Tyler - screams and all. Will try the bribery method too - anything is worth a go and you never know, my eardrums may survive another year.......!!

Can I just add a posting that is unrelated in a way but relevant for me? I am not autistic or Aspergers but my four year old son has ASD, diagnosed 3 weeks ago. Since then it has been information overload, so many numbers to call, benefit forms to complete etc etc. My deep rooted worry for my little boy was what would happen to him as an adult. I've read through your postings and I'm not worried anymore. I worried about whether he would have a normal life, would be hold down a job, would he have friends (even just one?) and what would happen when his father and I weren't around anymore? You are all completely within what I would term "normal" and to know that there are so many others like Tyler out there, who would understand and accept him, fills my heart with hope for his future. Thanks for the unintentional reassurance guys, and good luck to each of you. Nicki <'>