purplehaze

This is very good news and it's the first ever Act like it! The good thing also is that who ever comes into parliment the Act will be there to support our children when they become independent adults and adults who need the support now. The only problem may be is how long it will take to begin to work and support those that need it ASAP!!!

WOW-it seems that there seems to be a lot of schools particularly secondary that just don't seem to understand behaviour is displayed for a lot of different reasons and they need to be trying to understand the behaviour and why it is happening. Yes there should be consequences but there also needs to be support and understanding which doesn't seem to be happening in some schools. My 15 yr old son (ASD) was in a mainstream secondary school with a 22hr funded statement-he was given detentions all the time and never understood what they were for. He never achieved any of his objectives on his statement, he was excluded loads of time, a lot of staff never seemed to understand hisd behaviour and thats all they seemed to see and I trhink thats the problem you can't see anxiety, stress, sensory issues etc you can only see how people display them. I gave up in the end trying to change the way the school dealt with different situations and moved my son with to a SEN school with lots of support from outside professionals who also thought the school didn't have a clue. My son now has different role models and peer groups of children that are similar to him and he has had NO unwanted behaviour since being there. Have you any outside professionals, autism team, parent partnership, EP etc that can offer the school advice and new ways to deal with difficult or situations they don't understand. In the end I asked teachers to inform me of any detentions and reasons so I could explain it to my son and on a few occasions I actually told them if he hadn't had any support in the lesson he would not be punished with a detention. They and you need to look into what, why, when, where etc of the causes. Good luckxxx

Hello Andrew, welcome to the site.

Hello Jan, I'm glad you have finaly been given an answer and hopefully you both can get support for a positive future. My son is 15 and has autism and was diagnosed late compared to others with autism. I was also told various things such as he had delays with his emotional and social development, so I know how frustrating it can be. Good luck with the computer look forward to chatting xxx

Hello Maria-Alex, my son has some noise sensitive issues also and I notice it is worse when he is more anxious. I can't hoover or use electric cooking mixers/blenders when he is in the house unless I have made it secure by shutting doors and he is upstairs etc (then it doesn't always work), he screams at cutlery noises on plates etc. Your son could be more anxious for example you had a strange person (I assume with the Sky man) in your house that was making noise he wasn't use to, barking dogs may represent a scary dog etc etc. Try and keep a note of what noises he is having difficulty with and then you can try to introduce the noise through a noise game (lotto/CD-bought or home made) so he can get use to them etc it doesn't always help but sometimes it does. XXX

Will do Enid xxx Thanks for the info Kathrynxxx

Enid-I have discussed this with my son as much as I can and he has said he wants me to do it all-he knows he can't cope with it all. He has his own bank account and even if I put money in it for him to use to enable him more independence he asks me to get it out or doesn't bother with it-like his pocket money often just sits on a side or in a vase for weeks. He probably wouldn't speak or aknowledge anyone when somebody comes round so i'm not sure what they will do. I'll let you know what happens-it will deffinately be interesting LOL! Jsmum-thanks for the advice on the different support agencies etc. When he left the mainstream I relaxed a lot as things are 100% better so was not worried really but now I'm starting to think about the next few years! So I will be deffinately looking into it all and what should be happening-thanksXXX

Enid-Someone is going to come round just before his 16th birthday for me to sign some paper work so I can continue to manage his finances. Jsmum-when we had his last couple of reviews and discussed the transition process my son was in a mainstream school failing badly and to be honest they didn't seem to know what to put on the transition form and most of it was blank although the authority seemed to acept it as being ok. Also although he attends the outreach programme offered by the SEN school he is still on role at the mainstream as all professionals and myself agreed it would take too long to change the statement and my son needed to get out of the school ASAP!!!! The only problem with this (I found out this week) is the mainstream have to continue the reviews-this wasn't said in the discussion infact the ASD SEN manager from the SEN school said she would plan the next review but aparently they are not allowed?????. I think I will contact my sons children's disability social worker and ask what will be on offer when he leaves. It is a worrying time-the thought of your child going into the big wide world without much or any support. They go from having a statement that offers support for most of the day to not much if anything!!!! Thanks for the adviceXXX

I was also wondering what support a child gets that has a statement after 16 if they leave a SEN school????

Hello, I was told by a lovely man on the phone from the DLA "I have some good news for you....your claim is now for life and you don't have to claim again for your son" This is the second time I have had to fill in the DLA form (I do realise how lucky I am-as it's the dredded form). This time was due to my son turning 16 soon and so I had to fill in the adults form and now I don't have to fill it in again. I was so shocked when I was told this-is this normal?

This also hits a nerve with me-my son failed mainstream with a statement and thankfully is doing well in a SEN individualised outreach school. The problem is a lot of the time staff just see behaviour and don't understand it-they need training and the child needs some support and assessments to see what can be done to help etc. Do you know if the school have used the Inclusion Development Programme (IDP). This may help to understand the child a bit more. May be you could order copies of the booklet and send it to the relevant people!!!!! There is also online training that is FREE!!! http://nationalstrategies.standards.dcsf.gov.uk/node/165037 It's not always about getting funding but sometimes all that is needed is understanding and people like you!!! The school should be lucky to have you, Good luckXXX

When I asked if training was given to the staff at the mainstream school my son use to attend I was told it was offered but up to them to take it up!!!!!!! For anyone that is going into teacher training now they do have to do some training on SEN but I'm not sure what-I have 2 friends doing their QTS at the moment so I have asked them to keep me updated on what they do.

my son was born 2 weeks late and not breathing as he had the cord around his neck.

Just wanted to add What Karen A said about disaffection-when my son was having difficulties before the statement all professionals kept mentioning there was a likely for him to be a school refuser as school was such a scary place for him and this really supported the statement as well as the other stuff. The government are focusing on this-so it may work for you if you could get the school to log in a meeting that your son already truants and could become a school refuser altogether-bring it up and then it will be in the minutes of your next meeting!!! I also agree about being careful with what you sign!!!!!

Hello, i'm not sure it's the same thibg but my daughter's arm use to come out of the socket (at the shoulder) a lot when she was younger-she wasn't in any pain but wouldn't move it and then if I lifted it or moved it it would go back-she hasn't been diagnosed with autism like her brother but does have traits. XXX

Hello Fitzron, from my sons own experiences when a child in secondary school (not all) is displaying unwanted behaviour thats all they see and thats why it doesn't or takes a very long time to resolve the issues and offer the right support. some secondary schools cater for academic skills but in my opinion self-esteem and social skills are pushed aside or just expected to be there. If children can't fit into a secondary school and tow the line then it is a struggle for all (child, parents & school). I always tried to understand it from all pionts of view but then we got to the stage where even professionals just began being truthful and saying the school just don't understand. You should list all the problems your son is having-even on here for support then work through how or what could help to manage things then what professional could support go through your list with parent partnership and the autism team and ask what they think could support the individual problems/issues etc then call a meeting with everyone you need/want and go through your list, ask to see his IEP and ask them how they think they can support him for example my son had great difficulty in a maths lesson-and one of the biggest reasons was the teacher drank coffee and he couldn't handle the smell on his breath when he talked to him-he displayed unwanted behaviour to get sent out of lesson. Talk to your son and ask for his support-what things doesn't he like/what does he think would make it better etc-it may help. Things started to change for us when I got the children's disability social worker involved-she was great. Even though my son had a statement it didn't support him-you just need to find the right support/person etc. Keep talking on here it does help-I got to where my son needed to be to survive education and begin to enjoy it (he has no behaviour issues now) and hopefully we can support you to get your son there. Kepp talking XXX

Hello, my son and our family were assessed by the children's disability social worker but it was slightly different to the CAF and our social worker mentioned we could get direct payment or they offer a sessional worker which might be better for you as you don't have to worry about paying tax NI etc for someone.

Hello, My son is also 15 with autism and struggled in mainstream school every year he was there! He was excluded even though he had a statement and displayed unwanted behaviour due to anxiety etc. It seemed no body understood him I was frustrated, he was frustrated they were frustrated-it didn't work! The school is not meeting your sons needs he has identified SEN needs and they need to call a meeting and get outside professional support. The autism team should be giving constructive support also. Have you any one from a parent partnership team involved to support you? Just because your son has academic ability doesn't mean he isn't going to struggle socially or emotionally and thats what they should be looking at. It was a long battle for me to get my son the right support and he is now in a SEN school's individual outreach programme which is specifically planned for him!

Hello, tip toe walking has been linked to being a trait of autism and a stereotypical behaviour/sign to autism like no eye contact etc. I have worked with many children who have been diagnosed with autism and a large percentage have tip toes walked however my son who has autism has never tip toe walked but my daughter has always done it and been to see specialist etc to make sure it was possible to put her heels down etc (nothing medical found). She is 18 now and still does it but doesn't have autism (she does have some other autistic traits as well but copes well with most of what life sends her way). Hope this helps X

Welcome Leighann XXX

Hello Dillyn-welcome to the forum X

Hello Marion, I completely feel for you and your son-secondary school can be harder. Have you anyone to support you such as parent partnership or autism team etc? Could you explain a bit more about the problems your son is having in school and what if any support he is getting? (has he any support in lessons, timeout card, laptop to help with writing/spelling etc etc). My son's first RSA was turned down because the sencondary school he was in hadn't put enough support in place(the LA phoned me to say if I waited it would be sorted-and it was)-thats the problem you may have, but the good thing about it for us was the LA had a meeting with the school and told them what they needed to do and then 6mths later they put in the RSA again with support from everyone involved and my son got a statement with 22hrs-my parental advice really supported it (so I was told). How did you get on in the meeting? What targets has your son got in his IEP? Sorry there is so many questions but it will help us to try and help you!!

Hello welcome to the site, it's very proactive of you to start a website for you friends and family. Hope it all works out well for you.

Hi Kirsty, this is great news for you and to catch up with Alex, Tom and Oli. Well done, are you looking forward to it? X

I must say for someone that didn't know what pleb meant he certainly used it well at the end I think he deffinately looked it up and understands what it means now-the government can deffinately be plebs! Also did anyone else think it strange when Tom and his family arrived at the school he had to go and do an exam straight away!!!! I didn't think it was planned out very well-I know my son would have needed to settle in and had time to be calmer etc.