SuzyQ

hey all...... so ita been a terrible week my DD took overdose of lorazepaa and risperdone!! she now back in Alpha hospital.... complete nioght mare cant post morte exhausy=ted and i have had a zopiclone!

Hi Guys..... Yes she is on meds..... risperdone 6mg lorezapam (was 4mg ) now back to two strattera 120mg...... it's a ngihtmare. Yes the neck is because she is so unhappy, the cuts are not superficial but also not suicide attemps, she just finds it the best way to cope and I have to say likes seeing blood dripping out!!! We had emergency app with old psych, he reduced the lorazepam and we gotta go back next week!! I have to sleep wit her she wont go upstairs unless I am with her and now won't go into the kitchen unless I go ..she is ok during the day but as soon as it gets dark forget it it's a nightmare!!! Social services want to move her to a placement I dont feel will keep her safe, the psych said not to let her go if I think it that unsafe, but I cannot go on any longer, I want her admitted for psych assessment again.... and this time get to bottom of paranioa... last time they blamed drugs and ignored it.... I think in my heart of hearts she is a paranoid schizophrenic and has AS and maybe ADHD.... she is the sort of person you hear about on the news who goes mad and kills people!!! I am scared for her safety but also the safety of society around her!!!!! Social services just think I am being an awkward mum!!!

Hi, As some people on here will recall, after 10 months in a psychiatric hospital we finally found my DD a 52 week placement, even though it was in cumbria a 6 hour drive from us it seemed ideal....... now after 12 months social services have served notice on the placement!! My DD was home for a knee op ( ruptured cruciate ligament) and they have done it whilst she is home .... the op got cancelled as she had infection one in her lung, but the other to self harm cuts on her legs... new op date she was due to return to school for a week, but got a call from the school the day before taking her back saying she wasn't allowed back, that was last tues... also my nt DD 18th birthday and exactly a year to the date my DD started the placement!! They have found a placement in gravesend... KENT but not really home area!!!! and also it is just a semi indepentant house..... not a whole package in one area!!! NO ONE is listeneing to me, I viewed the property and it is totally not safe for my DD she is not ready for this step yet, not sure she ever will be she was in a complex care unit at school... you know locks on cupboards etc.... She is distraught, it ruined NT DD 18th...... on the sunday the 3rd my DD superficially harmed herself but on thursday 7th she had to go to hospital and have stitches in her arm we also saw crisis team. Yeasterday the Social worker came.... she is useless..... and my DD hates her she doesn't know my DD only had the case since April...ha ha ha ha and she is deciding what is best for DD ha ha ha ha(hysterical laughter) with a setional worker...hmmm DD didn't like this we are all very angry. when they left DD cried and was distraught, went to her room and in the two minutes it took for me and my other daughter to get upstairs she had cut her arm again... deeper than thursdays..... we went to hospital and spent 6 hours there.... try entertaining sonme one for 6 hours!!! she was so anxious it was awful and angry and hates me as she wants to be at school not with me!!! We got her stitched and a referral being made to her old team at CAMHS but when home....12.30 the agression came straight back, she verbally was abusive, then was trying to cut herself with a lovelt global knife...luckily one we dont use often so rarely gets sharpenned then lunged at me!! then the steel which sharpens it she grabbed it and lunged at me again hitting my arm, then she spat full in my face,then it was a glass herb jar from the cupboard and tried to lock herself out of the house...shutting me in the door kicked me slapped me shouted at me etc...think you all get the idea..... this kind of thing including trying to burn herself and threatening me and hiting me and pushing me and citting her arm went on until just after 3 am, she then calmed...... and with my NT DD who is great at calming her but shouldn't have to be going through this she settled into bed and said sorry to me and that she can't help it...etc.... I know she cant help it but she was in that placement for a reason and one of them is that she isn't safe at home and neither am i!!!! I was signed off of work last November with severe deppression as it all caused me to have a complete breakdown, I have weekely therapy for it, and have also just managed to start a college course, but this is now suffering , i feel that I was just maybe making a little progress but feel like I am back to how I was in November! My husband doesn't know how to deal with her, and never has got his head around it. My NT DD has just started to settle into trying to have a little bit of life, as she hasn't really been able to with DD home, and now she is on the verge of a breakdown and isn't coping as she has me and my other DD to deal with. HELP...... we have no support network and I feel she has just been dumped here until they can sort things out... the school are worried that she will harmherself ifc she goes back i think.... I must add she tried to strangle herself with a scart lead last night but I managed eventually to get it loose, and she has never cut herself like that at home. she is also becoming more paranoid, and I have slept with her for a whole week she won't go upstairs at night on her own!!! Sorry about long post just needed to share it...... i don't have anyone else to share with. a very frazzled Suzy

Ha ... I have this issue too it's a nightmare, added to that the school my DD is at has issues with CAMHS anyway due to postal address being one county and actual school being another!!!! My DD saw a private psychiatrist the school paid for, and even with regular visits to hospital for self harming she still didnt get anywhere with CAMHS, she has now been seeing one that comes to the school and I believe is linked to CAMHS somewhere, but it is not really enough, I think it is disgraceful as it is the children that suffer when authorities just want to pass costs onto each other!! As for as I know even though DD is at a residential school her home address is with me so in theory it should be my PCT that sorts it for her, but they say not!! Luckily the school are doing everything they can to get her help. good luck

Hey cheers guys. I hate rollercoasters, but I know I dont ride alone, we are all on it!! I guess I would just like my DD to have a scan, really so people can see that her brain works differently and the way she is is not A: Because she is a teenager... ( dont think we really reached that stage yet)!! B: Because she has in the past smoked cannabis C: Because she is bad and naughty and manipulative! Social Services see a teenager in total control and it worries me that they will move her from her school into a setting where there are knives and too many people together and she will harm some one or herself, because they don't know her her social worker has met her now about 4 times!!! they don't realise she needs at least 1:1 and often its 2:1 to keep her safe and other people!! I myself would love a scan to see if I have AS as I have alot traits, which i am startng to learn as i am learning who i am... worst rollercoaster of all!! I know I dont like people and dont know how I ever done my job because the thought of doing it terrifies me now. So thanks again for words that help, and give hope. I have grown some veg this year, i find gardening so theraputic...hated it before tho lol

Hi, ok got bored again reading the long replies, but feel i should say, my DD got her DX at 14, she has had alot of issues, but she refused to acknowledge the DX, I was told to just let her have time to come to terms about it and learn about it, and when she is ready it will be easier to talk to her, she is now 16, she still desperatley want's to be ..'normal'...her perception of it anyway!! I have spent this time reassuring her that it is all about strengths and weaknesses, in other words there are things she is great at and others she cannot do as she has no interest in them, she is slowly getting her head around it, she hates to be known as disabled, but she has has mental health problems more than just as and adhd and will probably need some kind of support throughout her life. Unfortunately alot of people do not understand mental health issues and do not accept them, this is again something to get to grips with, her brain works in a different was to her sisters, and that is how we are teaching her, not that it is disabled, but that it works differently. He learnig this is helping her understand why she reacts to certain things in certain ways, she also knows now that it is classed as a disability, but doesn't mean she is totally disabled. Again I agree with who ever it was said maybe learn about the word disabled first maybe, but be prepared to take small steps. with my DD i used to try to talk to her but she would not listen and become more aggresive, but now sometimes she asks me...and when she is open to talk we talk.... all about mental health problems psychiatrists etc... she is always checking meds on the internet she is obsessed with knowing causes treatments and side effects, so often she will say she wants to try a certain med...its very amusing at times, but at others completely frustrating. Good luck

Hi Guys, My DD is now on strattera, has been for a while, her attention span is still pants, she is on risperdone too, she refuses meds and also stores them, so the school now have to check she has taken them, with the risperdone they wanted the velo tab things but the gp refuses due to expense so now she has the liquid....she can't store that!!! I dont know if the strattera is working she has had an increase in it recently and is on 120mg daily. She is now 16 in a 52 week placement and she too is big and strong, it can take alot of staff to hold her, in the hospital last year it could take up to 10 staff!!! she is 5'9 and weighs about 15 stone, so you can imagine the power!! She was suicidale before and self harms badly, but ....i havent noticed it getting worse, if that helps? I dont know, my DD is also obsessed with drugs she cannot get any where she is luckily, and when on home leave she is always with me...again luckily. Good luck with it, for anxiety citalopram in small dose can work, again everyone is different and things work differently for each individual. Suzy

Hi MY DD was dx at about 14 with AS and just now adhd and we also think BPD some people have said she hasn't got it as she doesn't show typical signs.....of course she is female and most of the things they look for are from male's having it!! She does have it, but doesn't want to, she wants to be what she thinks is normal!!! I wish she had her dx earlier as now its a fight to keep her in the residential school we got her into as the 16+ team of SS said the placement was not long term, she has been there 10 months and just starting to settle down!! they were never at meetings so its a nightmare, she has had no secondary education as before in mainstram school she labelled naughty and disruptive rude and agressive!!! So i wold say push push push!!!! BTW I have alot os signs of it, and think i have it, i have even done an online test which i scored about 120 out of 200 in favour of AS I have some NT traits and some AS traits! knowing this makes a difference I now know why my husband suprising me and taking me out to dinner causes me to have panic attack..etc... and part of me wonders if the label would help me, but i have been on a sharp learning curve about it with my DD and wouldn't know where to start. But don't give in you know your child, it is drainning but it will be worth it to get him the help he needs. Suzy

Hi, Haven't read all posts...my attention is shot to pieces, since my DD spent 10 months in psychiatric hospital then moved to 52 week school 6 hours away i have had a breakdown after years of holding life together and spent the last 9 months unable to work or face life!! I have been asking for the last two years for a scan on my daughter who is now 16 and has dx of aspergers and now adhd and possible bpd and at 8 years old gender identity disorder, but that seems to have either been locked away in her head or is gone!! I am desperate to get some one to study her brain function and try to unravel the complexities of her. she also self harms is unpredictably violent and agressive, she says inappropriate things usually loudly at in appropriate times, she is 5'9 and weighs about 15 stone so you can imagine containing her is difficult. But no one seems to want to try to unravel her head!!! it's so frustrating. she has also have psychosis which was very scarey!! I know that a childs brain is still developing but there must be indicators, I know alot of teenagers are diagnosed with bpd when infact if they were an adult they would get the dx of schitzophrenia( dont know how to spell sorry) My DD is also very paranoid!! Hopefully scans will help people like my DD but may be too late for her.

Hi, Not been around much, the rollercoaster has been going too fast!! I have a DD who is now 16, she has had a lot of problems with behaviour etc... eventually we got the dx of aspergers approx 2 years ago, well about two months after we found out she was having visual and auditory hullicinations, the auditory were telling her to harm herself and her family, and the visual was a teenage girl telling her to do bad things, CAMHS were brilliant I have to say, we didn't realise at the time but after it came out at camhs it made sense. My DD had to have a bit of an emergency admission to a hospital as she tried to hang herself in her bedroom and I was also under threat from her. Just before CAMHS had contacted the Early intervention for psychosis team they are great and well worth trying. My DD unfortunately spent 10 months in hospital and then went to a 52 week school, but she is doing great now, well kiind of. she has also recieved dx of adhd, and possible bpd. the hospital medicated to the eye balls, but now she is on a more sensible amount. She has recently undergone alot of anxiety thanks to good old social services and the voices came back, the important thing is now she knows no one else can here them, as she thought before everyone could hear them and see the hallucination. she now speaks about it a little better. It is important your child knows its ok and that alot of young people especially with ASD's at some point can hear voices. and I agree write everything down, I remember my DD shouting 'SHUT UP' and we didnt know who she was talking to as she was upstairs on her own, it all makes sense now though. so keep a log!! good luck and find some help in the knowledge no one is on the rollercoaster on their own, we are all with you. Suzy

I have read that repost...rare my a**e!! MY DD spent 10 months in a secure psychiatric hospital because she tried to hang herself in her bedroom and wanted to kill me!! As I said she is now in a 52 week placement I only got this because I had to fight social services and say I couldn't have her at home!! my heart has been broken time and time again!! She now eats glass plastic anything she can when in a destressed state ahe has cut her neck face legs and her arm is scared half way up with cut marks, it fascinates her to open the woulnds and see them bleed!! she has also cut on her body, she doesn't get psycho therapy as such but is in a better unti now and is starting to improve, and as I said now social services want to move her because they think her needs aren't being met!! She has only been there 7 months!

HI Guys, just hopped of my terrible rollercaoster to post, wish I had seen it!! My DD now 16 has been in a 52 week school placement, but now moved to the 16plus team and they don't think it is meeting her needs as she is a self harmer and still occasionally doing it!!! This is a nightmare about meeting needs, people who don't know the children make the decisions!! It has taken me years for some one to finally say yes she has AS and on top of this she has had pyschosis and attention deficit and a possible borderline personality disorder!! she needs constant 100 percent attention when awake!! and they want to move her to an assisted living house!!

it's been a long time since I posted but yes yes yes... no one accepts my DD has AS it's a nightmare, its so obvious to us, but to others she is just naughty, my mum is terrible, I just think though its a generation thing and that she doesn't want there to be anything wrong with any of her grandchildren! My DD is now 16 and has moved from 10 months in a secure psychiatric hospital to a 52 week residential school, its been a nightmare and now her addiction to cutting herself is growing, she is fascinated by opening up scabs and cuts!! but social services see this as the school not meeting her needs!!! They don't get the AS side of her at all, she looks and acts very ' normal ' and wants to be what she feels is normal so will pretend! then when she can't hold it any longer she will blow!! She used to be perfect for my mum but turn into damien omen the moment we got her into the car! I just think it's hard for people to accept, I have given up trying to make them realise now, and when I get the lecture's on how she should know better I just ignore them! It's very difficult and frustrating but some people dont want to see it!

Hi, I haven't been on for a while I have been too busy riding the rollercaoster of life!!! My DD is now in a 52 week placement and has been to see private phsyciatrist who according to DD thinks she has add or some kind of adhd and she has been on this drug now for a few months, I know nothing of it, and she seems to have taken a step backwards, they have also had to increase her risperdone and she now has 6mg through the day, the person she see's also thinks she doesn't have AS according to DD ...all a bit mad really!! but thie response you posted about this drug makes me wonder if her self harming is worse due to the drug!

I know this might be the wrong place to ask, but my DD has AS and has been in a psych hospital for 8 months and is now going to a 52 week a year placement, but she doesn't get DLA as I haven't applied for it...could she still get it? we have spent the last 8 months driving a round trip of 130 miles every weekend to visit or to pick her up for a home visit and her new placement will be a minimum 6 hour drive one way!!! so we have added expense there also we still provide some food and normal stuff teenager's need, so should I apply?

Hi, Well Underley Garden have offered her a place so yes that is progress, as she has now been at the hospital for over 8 months!!! The hospital social workers are trying to arrange a visit,which is starting all the normal worries with her especially as it is so far to go they have told her she will have to stay over night on her first ever visit!! Night times are bad for her. She is much improved and seems to be more aware of her ASD which is brilliant, saying that its a roller coaster and at the moment I am having a tough time with guilt over it all, but I know it's a normal process. Good news is she has started taking an interest in art again, and after 8 months has actually done some lovely pieces, I was worried that she would never do it again, before going to the hospital she was obsessed with art, it was the only thing she concentrated on and seemed to find peace in doing it so I am so happy she is getting back to it. Will keep you all updated

Hi All, Finally we have some news on my DD who is still in hospital, it will be 8 months on Saturday, she has been seen by people at Underley Garden School in Lancashire(i think) just wondered if anyone knows of it. she is also being assessed today by a school in Wales, but I don't know the name of that one yet, no doubt she will tell me later when she phones.

Hi All, As some of you are aware my now 15yr old DD with AS and unspescific pyschosis(this is what they have now decided) is still after 6 months an inpatient at a pyschciatric hospital, well she has been struggling the last week ( not sure if it is to do with the fact they took her off of topirimate) and well she has been so bad she wasn't allowed home leave, won't go into all boring detail, but basically on Monday I had a call from one of her doctors saying that she wants to self discharge (she is there informally) and they cannot keep her unless as her parent and I have parental responsibility I say I dont want her discharged, which of course I had to do as much as it hurts, so now they are able to keep her under common law.....question is...what does this mean and what have I done???? She knows she has to stay there until her 52week placement has been found, but this is taking an unbelievably long time!!! Just wondered if anyone can help and tell me what holding under common law means, as that is what the doc said!! All good fun xx

Hi All Sorry for not being about lately been having a nightmare as funding for DD to stay at hospital was going to be pulled as she has been there over 150 days!!! We have now had it extended, and apparently the county panel have sat and agreed that a 52 week a year placement is needed, so ....Tomorrow I have a meeting with social services , its a 'Child in need' meeting.......does anyone know what these are like...I have now done plenty of CPA meetings but never a child in need. I am finding it quite distressing as my DD doesn't really understand that 52 weeks is a year bless her!! Yes she is still in the hospital and they are reducing meds, she is not doing great but responding to good behaviour chart where she gets a star if she is good and behaves and then when she earns enough stars they take her for a special treat. she is behaving very odd and more like a 6 year old than a 15 year old, I think this is probably the real her who isn't trying to fit into any stereotypical role and failing. Still not found any placements, I am guessing thats what we will discuss tomorrow, but it seems there is a lack of placements for girls has anyone else here had or got a 15 year old daughter with AS she does also have non specific pychosis or has for the last year and also her behavoiur is difficult to say the least, but she does seem to have stopped expressing wishes to kill people, but instead hugs and kisses she seems to have no social boundaries at all, and before she was admitted she wouldn't show emotion hated being touched and if she cried it made her angry, its all very odd. but I think we might be getting some where. On the other side of it my 16 yr old DD is now being referred to CAMHS as she is struggling with it all and cutting herself and up and down like a yo yo so fun times.

thanks Karen, so far the only place that seems to be in the running is grately huse, but I am sure it is only 38 weeks and we are after 52 weeks!!! it's ridiculous that there isn't anywhere for her. she cannot be the only 15 year old girl with the complex problem of AS and psychosis which means she has behavioural issues too....there must be somewhere that could cope with her!!!

***UPDATE**** Hi All, Just an update...not alot has changed. Social Services have seen us and my mum. I have no feed back, the funding for DD has been pulled as not enough proress is being made!!! We are awaiting a 52 week placement still and now it looks as though no school will accept her or have place, so she may end up in foster care or a care home, which i really dont want and not sure I will cope with that.It is one thing her being in a residential school it is another thing having her in foster care its all a nightmare and I know it all comes down to funding and what the cheapest option is...any ideas on schools that are residential ???? Getting to the stage of saying sod it i will have her home give up my job and care for her even though I know it would end with one of us seriously injured or dead! REally had enough now

Karen, thanks for advice, no she is not under a section, they were going to back in January but her Dr seemed reluctant. She was however deemed not to be Gillick competant , meaning that she doesn't have sufficient understanding to be responsible for a say in her care and that she is there under 'parental responsibility' but in that case I am sure as an informal patient there under my responsibility they should be discussing her medications and care with me!! One would assume...but maybe I am wrong. we have now been informed that she is going to have a visit by the police due to the broken window, but again I feel perhaps I should be invited to that also!! It is laughable...but not at all funny that not long ago she was abused by another patient...male!! and apparently even though she told us she was going to speak to the police about it I recieved a letter saying that she didn't want to take it further!!! Do these places have a duty of care?? because I am starting to wonder!! We were told yesterday that some one would call us back and let us know if they thought it a good idea we go and visit her tonight, she has asked to see her sister, we dont usually visit during the week as it is about a 130 mile round trip!! But if it will help her of when she is really distressed we do. We are still awaiting the call!!

Hi Guy's Thanks for letting me know I am not on the ride on my own. Had news from the hospital late last night (9pm) I hadn't heard from DD and she calls religiously at 1.30 and 6pm..this has developed over the last two weeks!! so we eventually called the hospital. She tried to take a member of staff hostage, the woindow she broke the previous day was an unbreakable window...!!! They told my husband they do not know how she managed it!! She is currently not allowed out of her bedroom and i on a ratio o two staff to one of her...she is very much as she was in November by the sounds of it, maybe a little worse but definately no better after four months in thereon high meds, of course they took alot of the meds away andnow they don't have the zombie...they have jekyl and hyde and a very volatile agressive one. I am going to look into some points raised by you guys later along with a few other things.... I am not happy that the only reason we know is because we called the hospital. they haven't fixed her r even stabilized her I still think the voices are bad and even the hallucintaion..which is a very specific one, last weekend she told me she had had two violent nightmares and a thir on the sunday night all involving strangling and stabbing staff memebers and other people... she has been brave and told some oneand they have dismissed it as normal to her!! she must be going through hell and I cannot help her, i feel awful and have spent most of yesterday evening crying. I just thought would share today's undate briefly, and will give more detail later after I have been to work ! Thanks everyone for you support It really is a great help

Boston legal Rocks, we have watched from season one, unfortunately season five is the last.....not watched it yet, my non AS DD loves it but my AS dd doesn't really get the humour and funily enough prefered to watch Lost!!!! go figure!

This sounds very technical, my capabilities end at lining paper...ha ha Good luck!