dom

If you've stuck together this far, you'll see it through. in my opinion that's a slow, frustrating journey at times, but from the dx (which is both an end and a new start) you can sort of piece some things together and make sense of the person. Hope it helps

wasn't dr Hans Asperger german or something? lol

from a sort of neutral point of view, people place far too much emphasis on sex, when IMO sex has very little to do with the L word. Random guess - most NTs (or shall we say the over-sexed NTs) stance on this is, they know roughly how their bodies respond, so when they're with a partner and they dont get that "awesome" physical release of endorphines (as portrayed everywhere these days- coz the hype says it HAS to be like an out-of-body experience) they put it down to chemistry, and soon or later search for another partner. And i'm guessing, people in the spectrum, for a combination of factors, dont really get the same awareness from their own bodies and physical responses (i read somewhere about different sensorial thresholds [?] ) so it's never going to be easy to connect with someone, let alone getting to the "promised land" we're fed an illusion of.

Dont know about the other films yet, but Adam was superbly made, lot of insight into it (did you see the alternative / deleted scenes and commentaries? ) It would never be easy to portray a 'cross-section' view of AS, from either NT or AS perspective, because we're all so specific, but i could relate to it. Actually made me wonder, if Adam is the "emotion-blind" maybe Beth's mum would be somewhat of a "reason-blind" for the fact that she knew about the hubby's affair and never said a word about it? Considering...i'd guess most NTs would be 50-50 between reason and emotion, but it seems society is more acceptant of those who may "lean" a bit more to the emotional side of things, say 20% reason and 80% emotion, but the opposite is sidelined?

now i feel things are starting to happen after all this time... just came from the Aspergers centre here in Norwich with mixed feelings but overall confused, had the AQ test done with a result of 37. feels as if i need to dig into myself to find myself.

Well that was spot on..i somehow feel in my personal journey (undiagnosed) i cant tell anyone what or how i feel, even my best friend of 6years, 1st time i told him about my suspicions of AS & symptoms (i was reluctant to tell but he found out i was having CBT at the mental wellbeing service so i told him) and he plainly put it down to me being depressed, and lacking self esteem all my life. But no real support, just "get that crazy idea out of your mind and you'll be fine" At that point i thought to myself, is this the kind of friends i need? There's no map to my journey but im hoping to find some comfort along the way. All the best:)

hello welcome...similar story here. All the best

that "dont feel like i belong anywhere" has been ever so present for me. in relationships, career, family/social life, most hobbies etc..this is what has led me to search for help. In hindsight, maybe i wouldn't mind to have under-achieved in areas of my life, if i wasn't "so intelligent, talented, patient, kind" etc. like some close friends have described me in the past, if it made me a bit more "normal".. :S

ive just contacted the Asperger east anglia centre, i need to have a referral from the CBT therapist, in the meantime i got an interview there next week... thanks

The people we have around us do play a part in this isnt it..i'm afraid those around me aren't very supportive or understanding, today had a chat with my best friend of 5 years, 1st time i told him about me going to the mental health clinic and about AS, he very plainly said i was depressed, had no confidence or self-esteem due to my present circumstances and largely to my family (he knows them and its a valid point) who dont really give a shot about me unless they need something. Time for some changes and grow a thick skin then.

the more i think about it (in my case -undiagnosed) ..it's like, most of the time rational thought processes take over - unless i'm feeling very relaxed and/or on my own with some "happy / funny" feeling - leaving very little to the emotional intuitive response. I do feel something but there's a variable time span in which i need to think about it, rationalize it - if i don't, that's when my "quirky odd character" sneaks through. If i do, during the time i need to think about it, it's as if the emotion is lost to some extent. I reckon I can't have one without the other but it seems to explain things for me: why i'm much better at reading/writing than communicating verbally, why I'm ALWAYS reasoning about situations (which makes me feel cr@p at times even if others say I'm right) ...the list goes on. Hope this helps somehow.

very interesting post.when it comes to myself and my experience with music, i cant remember when i really liked all the tracks in any given album.some i tolerate, others i dismiss, and a chosen few end up going on and on!Guess it can be said that i'm one of those people that is more attentive on the details rather than the whole, i listen to an array of genres/ groups/ artists and like the subtle nuances in melodies or rhythms..sometimes in my head i kind of "sample" the bits i like then create variations within the same theme.I notice this very minute there's some kind of pattern to other things i like apart from music, hmmmm! now it got me thinking.

here's to the unprovoked honesty that is a trait of AS

yes these routines are our comfort zone..but isnt there some "happy" medium between doing the same routines all the time (mostly lonely or within a very restricted group of people) and trying to do different activities with different people while trying to connect with them? for me it is a bit frustrating either end. I get that more people like me (warts and all) than i give myself credit for, i just dont know how to come across to them.

what i also feel sometimes its something strange to describe, it's as if i have got no ego in myself in the way i come across to people. I'm an analytical guy..i talk about things very factually and my emotions rarely come into it. I've been asked if i ever swear, or why do i have some of the rigid non-sense routines i have! Erm..i just cant explain