allure

Lauren, thanks for the reply. they told me the same thing about wade maybe having another one or never having anymore at all. it's not alot of comfort having unanswered questions, is it? With wade we've seemed to "acquire" dx. when he was 4 he was dx with adhd. when he was 7 they added the dx of OCD and tourette's. It always was apparent though that there was something more. then 4 years ago i was chatting to this friend online who has 7 children and explaining to her my frustration about wade's dx and the fact that this still didn't explain certain behaviours. she told me about AS. her daughter has it. i read everything i could find about it and sat here crying my eyes out because what i was reading was wade to a T! So i approached his shrink at the time about the possibility of wade having AS. which i was told "no way" to. Frustrated i left the office thinking my hopes of finally having answers were shattered. Then a year later one day at school wade had a major meltdown. It took 4 people to hold him back while he tried to bash his head through a brick wall. He really lost it. We took him to the hospital not having clue what to do and he was seen by the pediatric neurologist on call in the A&E. After a few days in the hospital and a few tests he was diagnosed by the neurologist with AS. FINALLY! It was such a relief to finally know. So we had acquired yet another thing to add to his list of dx. But when these seizures started i was scared and perplexed all over again. The "not knowing" is driving me nuts!! Thankfully he doesnt have them often and they are very mild but still. I am convinced that wade is braver than i. He doesn't seem distressed by them at all. He has one and then kind of shrugs it off as "something that just happens to him sometimes". He's truly my hero! He was such strength to endure all he goes through and endure the ridicule from kids at school and he still carries on with his head held high and just deals with it in the best way he can. sorry didn't mean to go on and on and write a novel here! thanks for replying and listening

Wade had his first seizure about 3 years ago. It only lasted for about 30second but it was enough to scare the living hell out of me and have me scoop him up and rush him off to the hospital! It was only a mild one, and since then He's had 4more. Each time the same thing, mild, short, only now I don't rush him off to the hospital every time. They've run blood tests, two EEG's and have utterly no idea why He has them or what is causing them. when we were still in the states he saw a neurologist (who is actually the one that dx him with AS 3 years previously) and even he couldn't explain them. So the doctors have just had a kind of "wait and see" if there are more attitude. Which I am telling you is not alot of comfort to me. Then yesterday I was poking around online and came across an article at www.autism.org (which is the center for the study of autism in the states) and there was an article on Puberty triggering autistic people to have seizures. here's what it says: "About one in four autistic individuals begin to have seizures during puberty. The exact reason for the onset of seizures is not known, but it is likely that the seizure activity may be due to hormonal changes in the body. Sometimes these seizures are noticeable, (i.e., associated with convulsions); but for many, they are small, subclinical seizures, and are typically not detected by simple observation." so I am wondering if anyone else has heard of such a thing?? Do anyone else's children have occasional seizures that they can't explain? They aren't going to put wade on meds for them as they are so infrequent and no immediate danger to him at the moment. Plus he is already on 4 other meds. But it'd be interesting to know what other kids doctors have said about seizures they are having that are unexplained.

Hi, my name is melissa and I have a son who is 12 with AS,ADHD,OCD and Tourette's. I registered a few days ago but have just found the introduction link I look forward to sharing and learning here.

*fingers crossed for you* hang in there hon..

while i don't have much advice for you on things you could do, I wanted to show my support and send you a hug and let you know that there are other moms out here who understand. I think at one time or the other we've all been at the end of our sanity. I know i've been there more than once, twice or even fifty times. There's a saying that i try to remind myself of... "what doesn't kill us can but make us stronger".. i know right now you could probably care less about being strong and probably wish it'd just have mercy and kill you i've been there. Try to hang in there and keep your chin up. Do you have an Educational Psycologist that deals with your son that could perhaps suggest some things? Perhaps parent partnership could help? whatever you choose know we're here to support you *soft smile* we're all in the same boat.

we get wade's from the shrink..however i've looked online and this place has it: http://www.agestop.net/Agestop/product_det...?PID=112&CID=89 and it's cheaper if you buy more than one bottle.. hope this helps!

wade hates it when we look at him and will rarely make eye contact..it's all very normal for children like this. The wind thing may be a sensory issue.. wade doesnt seem to mind the wind as much as he does the rain. although i have caught him covering his ears on a windy day before. hang in there..

wade calls names too but can't stand it when someone else calls him names. perhaps this is your sons way of getting to kids thinking that because name calling gets to him that it will have the same effect on them and make them feel the same way he does when someone calls him a name? in our house we call it "wade logic".. the teacher telling the kid that your son hurts people was very wrong.. because he will take it literally and perhaps think she is lying about him and think she is telling the kid that he will "physically" harm him... i know that's what wade would think if someone said that about him. perhaps you could sit him down and explain to him that what he is calling them isn't true.. say perhaps for example "you called Tommy a dummy, do you know what a dummy is?" and explain to him the definition of whatever he called them. perhaps then explain to him that he doesnt like being teased or called names so it makes the other person feel sad when he calls them names. ask him how he would like to be called that. i've found with wade that if I make the situation something he can relate to and understand emotionally he will understand the impact that his actions have on others. I would definitely take up the teachers actions with the head teacher or something though, what she did was not right or fair! hope this helps even a little bit

i emailed the times... as of yet, no reply! i'm not holding my breath!!

thanks Paula i will check it out!

curra, thanks. they tried the circle of friends thing before but the other kids were only doing it to get to the front of the canteen queue and could have cared less about keeping wade out of situations like that. He has one boy that he calls a friend but they don't see each other much during the school day. ii will be sure to ask for a copy of the bullying policy. thanks again, you've been a ton of help!

In the US there is a zero tolerance policy for bullying, though even there it did not always work. However they seemed to address the problems with more seriousness and my son didnt seem to have half the problems socially in the states that he's encountering here. Perhaps it is because he wasn't the "new american kid" there *shrugs* We had a meeting with the school the other day with the senco and wade's key worker and even they said that the other kids may instigate it but it will be wade that gets caught because he doesnt have the skills to not get caught. So my question to them was "is there not a way you can protect him from this treatment?" and their answer was to not allow him in the canteen at lunch. so i guess i feel my child is being punished and excluded from being able to eat a hot lunch versus a pack up (which he wont eat and will just go to waste) just so there is no chance that these kids will have the oppertunity to bully him. UGH!!!!!!

how does someone go about finding out about the buddy scheme?? my son is 12 with AS and with moving here to the UK from the states last year and his having social troubles at school He's got no one other than my husband and i to socialize with.. i think he could really benefit from something like that! please let me know how to find out more. thanks

zaman, thanks, i went back and hunted down the post you were speaking of and it did help a bit.. curra, this is exactly the sort of thing my son comes home saying. He sees these kids now as they enemy and is wanting revenge for the way they have treated him. I've told him that he's to ignore them and not even speak to them. But telling an AS kid this who's determined to see them as evil enemies, well easier said than done. Ijust don't want wade getting all excited about being there all day only to have them decide he is too much trouble and snatch it back away from him. I'm new to the laws over here and knowing exactly what he's entitled to by law. thanks for the input, it really helped!

my son wade will still wet sometimes during the day and so we remind him alot to go potty. He does not do it at school but He will here at home if He is wrapped up in something and really concentrating and not paying attention. He also did wet at night but his pediatrician has prescribed desmopressin for him at night, he takes one before bed and it's gone from an every night of wetting thing down to now only once in a blue moon. the desmopressin has really helped at night. have you tried rewards? perhaps each day he goes without wetting he gets a special treat or an extra half hour of tv time or something? reminding seems to help wade but not always so we use rewards to praise him for not wetting.

Jb, although i think it is socially good for him to be able to interact with the other children I worry about the amount of interaction He recieves. Sometimes I wish he was like your daughter and shied away from situations like this to protect him from what could happen. I guess its that protective maternal instinct in me that doesn't want him to be in potentially bad situations and wants to shelter him from them. But i know i can not always be there for him to shelter him from these things. I am just trying to figure out the best ways to give him the tools and knowledge and skills to cope with them. thanks for replying Bagpuss, thanks. I was appauled by it too. Are there not laws in this country that protect children from bullying?

Jill, could you tell me where you got your orange/apple t-shirt from, i'd really like to get one! I wouldn't put wade in a shirt like that naughty one. He's 12 so He would not wear it anyway but i think it also gives people who are misinformed (such as katie grant from the times) more ammunition to misconstrue what autism is truly about!

Hi, i'm new to the board and I have a 12 year old with ASD, we moved to the UK last year from the states and so this is my sons first year in school. It took from April of last year until October of this year to just get him in school here. Despite the fact that i brought over from the states with me his IEP, His diagnosis from the Dr.s there, and basically every record of his school history that they had. It's been a struggle for him to adjust socially here. He doesn't understand the way things work with kids here in the UK. He's always had a hard time making friends as it is and although I am told that the kids at his new school think the fact that He is American is cool, He still is having difficulty. He's always been the sort of kid that kids preyed upon and took advantage of. Mainly because he is so hungry for friendship he will let them take advantage and use him. He started out going just a few hours each day. Finally worked up to going through lunch. Then the trouble started. He's getting into fights at lunch and being picked on and called names by a certain few of the kids. So the school asked the kids what was happening and of course they claimed innocence and blamed it all on my son wade. So he was sent home at lunch. (which i feel was punishing him without punishing them). I know my son isn't an angel. He has troubles and He often doesn't understand or grasp social situations. However it takes two. That was 6 weeks ago. Now the school has decided wade can come back for lunch and they are even going to extend his school day to a full day. However at first he will not be allowed out with the rest of the kids. He will be allowed to go to this place called "the zone", where they do tutoring etc. He's allowed to have friends with him but He has to bring a pack up each day because He won't be allowed in the lunch room to go buy a lunch. (which he isnt happy about because he doesnt like bread and hates the thought of eating sarnies everyday). what I am concerned with is: each week if He does well he will earn the right to spend one day with the rest of the kids and be able to go to the lunch room. The school is determined to insist that wade is the cause of the previous troubles with fighting and his own bullying. i just know in my heart that the minute he earns his lunch time with the other kids back that these kids will start in again. we've tried telling him to ignore the kids and if they say things to him or do things to inform a member of staff. however he does not always do this. has anyone else had trouble with their child being bullied at school and if so, do you have any advice for me to give to my son on how to handle it?

I've emailed the times about this. I'm outraged that they would even allow her to post such slanderous stuff!! this is what i've mailed them: I was appauled to read the report by Katie Grant on Sunday. For her to suggest that "a good deal" of kids that are labeled with autism just have issues at home such as neglect or bad child rearing, is outrageous!! My son is diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome, which is a high functioning level on the Autistic scale. The pain and challenges that parents of autistic children go through is enough, without someone who has no clue what it's like to deal with this, day in and out, jumping in and stating that our child's behavious is in some way the fault of the parent! Perhaps she should spend a day walking in the shoes of a parent with an autistic child, and then see if she can make the same claims! It is the utter ignorance of people like her why our autistic children are so misunderstood and labeled in the world today! Melissa Nottingham I will let the board know if I recieve a response.. although I am not holding my breath!

I truly believe that laughter keeps us sane in times like that *L*

wade's been on melatonin since October and it is wonderful..also when His tics get bad and the sertraline isn't helping we increase His melatonin to 6mg and it truly helps Him to relax and his tics slow back down

my son wade is 12 and He's on sertraline to help with the OCD and the tics..