Laddo

Entanglement

That looks interesting, might have to check them out

That's horrific. I bet your kid was encouraged by teachers etc. not to retaliate, too? I have so many memories of kids at school beating the hell out of me, giving me a black eye, splitting my lip etc. and just being told to ignore them. It's been what I've been taught my entire life - 'Don't stand up for yourself', 'Just accept it when horrible things happen to you', 'Don't make a scene - conform.' Once at school some idiot split my lip. I chased him for a good 10 minutes until a teacher caught us, him with me chasing him but otherwise unhurt, me with blood all over my face. We were both sent to the headmaster's office, and then after another 10 minutes of sitting in silence, the kid was allowed to go. I got suspended for 'spitting blood'. Yes, you read that correctly - I got suspended for bleeding. How dare my blood not stay in my blood vessels after someone hit it! How unreasonable of me! In my opinion as kids we (not just autistics, but every kid who is getting bullied) are encouraged to not stand up for ourselves, which in turn kills our self esteem later in life. Bullies are the real winners in life - just look at MPs. I bet a huge number of them bullied people when they were at school. They want those they see as weak to be crushed. I think it's time for change

This is what I'm worried about. They government keep throwing money at 'solutions' to problems but they keep withdrawing funding when MPs realise that as a result of this they don't have enough money to pay their chauffeurs or pay for their £37 breakfasts.

Hi verbeia, how's it going? You sound quite similar to me, although my sensory issues don't give me much grief. I notice small sounds, smells and touches but they don't really mind them. I'm in the same boat in that I'm not 100% I do have Asperger's, although I was diagnosed with it as a child. It doesn't fit the whole picture for me though. Take care Laddo

^I think Trekster's decision was probably more down to you saying things like vegetarian promoters should be hanged, saying 'enough' when Mihaela stated her opinion and general hostility. I wouldn't class them doing their job as a moderator to be bullying.

I'm the same to some extent but with me being with someone of a similar emotional age causes a lot of problems. I've been in relationships where both myself and my partner have been of a similar emotional age and we ended up clashing and arguing quite a lot. Being emotionally quite young makes me feel rather jealous and paranoid and my partner would feel the same but as I'm a man, I was expected to be the 'strong' one. Somehow me being jealous was pathetic according to my ex but it wasn't for her? Right, makes perfect sense... I'm wondering if falling in love easily is an aspie thing? When I was a member of another ASD forum I got a lot of private messages from aspie girls after putting up a photo of myself. According to other people I'm a handsome lad but never get this sort of female attention in real life.

Personally I would still be worried about your child being encouraged to go to the toilet in public by someone who is supposed to be looking after him. It seems a bit odd

Thanks mate That's a great poem showing the other side to mine. It's kind of like a 'counter-poem', so to speak. I'm quite interested in seeing alternate perspectives on a situation so it was good to read your little piece. You speak a lot of truth in your sentences as well as your prose too - the tormentors often feel tormented themselves, trapped in their own cage of hatred and fear of difference

That's good that you're recording every time your son comes home from school distressed - it might be worth showing the school to give them a better idea of how often it goes on. The first two incidents you mentioned are pretty bad but the third is really bad. In fact I think the governors should know about this because that teaching assistant needs to be heavily disciplined - they clearly are not knowledgable enough about children's safety to do their job properly. Are they not aware of the danger they could have put your son in? Do they do this for every kid that needs the toilet in the park? Surely the kids must ask to use the toilet quite often while they're at the park. They can't do this every time. It does sound like they're victimising your son a bit, something I can definitely relate to. Maybe it would be worth at least looking at your other options for your son's schooling? His current school does not sound like anyone there is qualified to teach children with autism

Wagwan Sam! Looking for jobs is a pain in the rear isn't it? Whatever you're looking for, good luck!

Hi Shaye, welcome to the forum. Sorry to hear you and your son are having difficulties with his school. As someone with ASD who had a terrible time at school (heavy bullying by a few pupils and most members of staff), I can relate to this. You should definitely go ahead with your plans to have a meeting with his teacher and TAs once your son returns to school. Make sure they know you feel they are letting your son down when they should be helping them. If they continue to ignore you and keep allowing other kids to hurt your son, take it to the governors. If they don't help, take it to OFSTED. Make sure the school is aware you are doing all this and hopefully they will be a bit more helpful. Good luck

http://www.autism.org.uk/News-and-events/News-from-the-NAS/Autism-Innovation-Fund-projects-announced.aspx The NAS's first scheme in the article could be useful I suppose, although they're not exactly major strides in ending discrimination against autism. The second one doesn't sound like much to get excited about. Their 'short break' services cost money and are often no different to having a short break with a normal holiday provider. I see the government are willing to grant funding for innovations to help autistic people but they do not seem very keen on actually doing any work towards it themselves. It looks like a 'here's some money, sort it out yourself and above all, vote Conservative!' kind of thing rather than a 'we genuinely want to help' thing. Thoughts?

^I totally agree with this, but I would say this is more on the pro side for the soldiers on the frontline rather than the armies they fight for though. The people at the top who send wave after wave of men and women to their deaths, though? I have no praise for them. People forget that battles are directed by humans. Humans tend to make mistakes, then arrogantly blame the mistakes on everyone else but them. The whole system is grossly flawed

On the subject of alcohol, I strongly believe that criminalising it will make matters worse. Just look at what the 'war on drugs' has achieved thus-far - absolutely nothing positive. Instead, there is reportedly more heroin coming into the country than ever, people-smuggling isn't reducing, addiction isn't falling and the black market in drugs is bigger than ever. All criminalising a substance does is creates a black market for that substance. To obtain said substance, one must go through unsavoury means, for example smuggling people into the country with promise of a new life, then forcing them to remain in grow-houses. Really the 'war on drugs' is nothing more than a weak attempt to make the government appear in control. They act as if seizing a few thousand pounds worth of cocaine is a massive victory for them, but it makes such a tiny different to the billions that are being made by organised crime firms turning addiction into a business. Criminalising alcohol would have all the same problems if not more, considering the huge amount of people already addicted to the stuff. Homemade spirits can very easily become highly toxic and even explosive as well - criminalising alcohol will lead people to brew their own, thus increasing the risk of creating toxic spirits and thus increasing the mortality rate. On top of all that, making it illegal to put something in your own body is absurd anyway. If we had better education beginning from an early age on the effects of alcohol and stop glamourising it the way we British do, then I believe we would see a substantial fall in alcohol-related harm

Peek was the real 'rain man'. I'm not saying memory is an autistic skill, but incredible recollection of thousands of tiny details is a form of savantism. Kim Peek wasn't even autistic. - he had FG syndrome instead - but he was a savant. Daniel Tammet has Asperger's, but he is also a savant. See the distinction I'm making? Savantism often accompanies autism as it involves utilising memory in a completely different way to most people - it is theorised that information is processed different for autistic people over NT people. I feel like a bit of a weirdo because I process information in both the 'autistic' way and the 'NT' way. It's hard to explain, but it's like I'm at the border of being AS and being NT. Because of this, it allows me to see both sides of the coin, so to speak. Unfortunately most people can't remember things like pi to 10,000 digits. I know for a fact I would not be able to remember such a long string or chain of information. If I were to learn certain 'anchor points' of pi, I would forget other anchor points and only be able to remember so much at a time

It's a twisted view of 'realism'. Obviously things can and will change and to suggest that wanting change makes you a 'well-meaning dreamer' is just sad. The remark about 'living in the real world' is especially belittling. Those who think change will never come are the ones living in a dream world - their own personal nightmare. Maybe my post went off on a rant but it is a result of an accumulation of a lot of negativity and pessimism directed by Waterboatman at me and other members - 'don't grow old', 'I live in the real world', 'vegetarian promoters should be hung' etc. etc. My point is to try and bring others down just because you yourself are miserable is selfish and wallowing in self pity. Look for positives, not negatives. Maybe people starving in Africa and people getting bombed in the middle east have the right to look for nothing but negatives but here in the UK where food is plentiful, heating is widely available and one can still get free health care etc. - no. It's just selfish to only focus on negatives

Well meaning dreamers? I find that quite patronising and rude. I have lived in the real world too. I've experienced emotional abuse from a parent, have been inappropriately touched by a doctor while being assessed for Asperger's, bullied a lot at school by both pupils and teachers, witnesses alcoholism in my stepdad, experienced alcohol and drug addictions, struggled with depression, anxiety and suspected bipolar all my life, have a worsening curvature of my spine which may eventually lead to me not being able to walk and already causes numbness in my legs at the age of 23 and was in an abusive relationship to name a few of the bad experiences I've had in life. Everyone has to deal with bad things in their life, everyone. Does that mean I should be pessimistic, not bother trying to change, even go on about my bad experiences all the time? No. That is no way to live. Life is full of horror but also full of beauty. More beauty can be achieved through change. I have noticed that through all your pessimism you ignore the fact that things do change for people, things do get better. Women have the vote which they didn't have 100 years ago and although there is still raging gender inequality going on, women are more respected in our society than ever. Same goes for non-white people. What exactly does endless pessimism achieve? To me, pessimism is one of the ultimate forms of selfishness - a kind of 'Things haven't gone well for me so they'll never go well for anyone. I want everyone to feel as bad as me blah blah blah'. I am choosing to enjoy life, despite all the negative stuff it throws at me. To be honest Waterboatman, your negativity about so many things and the way you can get quite rude to people you disagree with is starting to put me off coming on this forum. You don't have to bring everyone else down because you're unhappy with your own life

Dotmarsdotcom, that is a fantastic and eye-opening response! It all makes a lot of sense, especially regarding people's darker side coming out. I'm really glad to see that this doesn't happen here. Meet-ups are a brilliant idea though as long as they are well-organised and we don't get any trolls turning up just to make people's lives a misery

That's a shame. With better site security and spam filters it could be possible for members to safely put up photos. Like I said, it works on other forums like Wrong Planet - the difference being that this forum has not descended into a cess pit of arguments that are encouraged to go on for the website creator's amusement and favouritism (certain members would not be banned or warned by mods even when they trolled and got very offensive to other members). I checked the moderator list on here last night and it seems like there are very few mods and admins left on here, which is a shame - this could potentially be a very strong community

Nah, not necessarily. It can be written in such a way that strongly hints at the NAS but doesn't actually use their name, for example: 'National charities for autism claim they have support and services for high-functioning autistic adults as well as parents of children with classic autism. However, evidence suggests users with HFA are being let down blah blah etc etc'

Holy moly, some of the abilities on here are absolutely incredible! I wish I had a memory like some of you. I can do this too. I can see visualise 3D rooms or landscapes in my mind with a fair amount of detail if I try hard enough. I always assumed that it was something nearly everyone can do but by the sound of things it's quite a special ability. Just out of curiosity, do you dream a lot UnusualPatronus? I dream pretty much every time I go to sleep, even if it's only for a minute or so, and most of the time my dreams are vivid and have incredibly detailed environments.

You should really go and see someone about your joints Waterboatman. If you get a formal diagnosis you might be able to get more ESA and financial support for your mobility needs. You might be able to get a carer to assist you as well