Just Jo Report post Posted November 11, 2006 My son is 12 and has Aspergers Syndrome, he is constantly being excluded due to his condition, he is in the process of getting a Statement. He is in a mainstreme school and quite frankly none of the teachers seem to understand that his behaviour is due to his Aspergers, he is getting shouted at by teachers which make him angry and shout back. He used to totally "Shut down" and he got punished for that, over the last year he has become so frustrated that he swears,kicks things and hits himself in the head brusing himself. He has got excluded for this. However, they issue after school detentions for him..... My question is..... should he attend after school detentions. Most of the time he doesnt attend and its not taken any further. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Elanor Report post Posted November 11, 2006 Hi This is a terrible situation - your son must be under intolerable pressure. The school seems to have treated your son as if he were naughty, rather than in a manner appropriate to someone with a special need. The result is that they are punishing him for having Asperger's, and I think you would be totally justified to refuse the detentions. How far have you got with the statementing? You need to get the right measures in place to support your son - and you need to be in the driving seat. There are things that can be done to help - and it's not too late. My son is 12, and whilst he doesn't have a statement, he has developed a great relationship with his learning mentor, which really helps life. However, this was on the back of the school accepting that he has ASD - you school is clearly not accepting this. I'm sure you'll get loads of good advice here. Take care. Elanor Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Just Jo Report post Posted November 11, 2006 Thanks for your reply..... they have been trying to statement him since October of last year, he is on IEP's, a Educational Phychologist has assessed him. They school do not except that his behaviour is due to his condition and treat him and rude, stroppy, agressive and naughty. they said "we have other aspergers who dont act like this" It has taken me 10 years to get my son diagnosed, it was Feb of this year i got it. He has always been treated as naughty, surely this late diagnoses has been horendous for my son. When he is class and a teacher shouts at him and tells him off, he shouts back and swears, then on-call is called and he refuses to move or talk, sometimes he walks off kicking or hitting walls, teachers then follow him telling him off, he was pulled by his school bag by the deputy head the other day. Some teachers tell him to walk away to calm down, others tell him off for this. He just has no structure, as all staff deal with him in a different way. I have had so many meetings with the school and tried to explain his condition and all i get back is that "his behaviour is not acceptable and they he should be setting a example to the other 1199 student in the school". He has been out of school more that he has been in school.... At home he is getting worse because of this. Im really not coping. I have got a meeting at the school next week, who could i contact to come with me and explain that he acts this way because of his Aspergers...... I feel they blame me as i am a single parent.. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
annie Report post Posted November 11, 2006 Hi Just Jo, Welcome to the forum . My son used to have the same thing . Give IPSEA a call on Monday morning. If you don't get through straight away, please keep trying. There a quite a few issues going on here that IPSEA should be able to help you with. They are brilliant. Contact Parent Partnership, the details should be on your LEAs website, they should be able to send somebody along to the meeting with you, but call IPSEA anyway, just in case. they have been trying to statement him since October of last year Getting a Statement (from start to finish) should take 26 weeks. It sounds like your son is really not coping . Sometimes it isn't worth trying to get a school to support your child when they don't want to, it shouldn't be like that I know , we put up a huge fight, including one to get him out of the school . Getting an education package that was best for our son was the best thing we ever did, he went on to do EOTAS, small group learning paid for by our LEA. The difference in our son was amazing! Annie xx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Just Jo Report post Posted November 11, 2006 Thank you soooooooo much Annie......Will get on to them Monday.... Jo xx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
butterfingersbimbo Report post Posted November 12, 2006 this is terrible!!!! dont let them get away with this, they are descriminating against your son big time, hopefully IPSEA will kick their sorry ass ......and hopefully pp too.....let us know how you get on! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Just Jo Report post Posted November 12, 2006 this is terrible!!!! dont let them get away with this, they are descriminating against your son big time, hopefully IPSEA will kick their sorry ass ......and hopefully pp too.....let us know how you get on! Ringing IPSEA tomorrow, feeling more positive now... thanks Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LKS Report post Posted November 13, 2006 Hi justjo <'> for you and your son. My ds is also 12 and in a mainstream secondary he has a statement for AS. I thought the whole point of LAs 'not issuing' so many statements is that support is supposed to be in school already The school sound as if they are doing absolutely diddly squat to try and help your son, and how confused and distressed he must be feeling. My ds is seen regularly by someone form the specialist autism teacher unit. Between us we did a very good pupil profle that ALL teachers and staff working with ds are supposed to have. We tried to keep it brief but it has his main problems what is likely to upset him and most importantly what they can do to help. I must admit though there are still some teachers that refuse to look at this and say they haven't got the time, but each year at open evening I have taken a copy and asked them to sign it while I am there I think that at the moment your son needs more help and support than that and this is the sort of thing that should have been put in place when he started. I wonder how exactly the school have been trying to get a statement for him since Oct. last year, it would be interesting to hear what stage they are at in the process. I agree with annie really try and get hold of IPSEA it can mean just waiting and waiting to get hold of them but they know exactly how to get through this rubbish from schools. Make sure you've got a big pad of paper handy Parent partnership can be very good especially at coming with you to meetings with schools as they can help to diffuse some very emotional meetings. Hopefully they will come with you for this meeting, if not it would be a very good idea if you have someone to support you and take notes. And if the school make you feel uncomfortable do not be drawn into meetings with them by yourself and try and get everything in writing. Good luck to you and your ds, it might be that this school is not the best place for him but for goodness sake they should at least try. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Just Jo Report post Posted November 13, 2006 Thanks for your support and replies. I have today rang SNIP, and they have been very helpful, still trying to get through to IPSEA and will keep trying. I have sent a letter to the school today to see how far along they are with the Statement. I have a BIG meeting with the school soon and have asked the Educational Phy to attend along with Social Services, who will be taking notes. This site has been an amazing help to me thank you. Will let you know how i get on..... and will keep trying IPSEA.....xxxx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
