Paula Report post Posted November 19, 2007 This weekend has totally done me nut in. Teenage aspie son sat in stinking underpants and kicking of when i insisted he got dressed............ Then me husband started ranting and raveing at him because he was doing his head in.......... It all just kicked of........... I ended up crying and wishing to god things could change but knowing inside this was it this was life........... Then i was back on me why us why our son whay cant he be "normal" carry on all over againe........... Its always always there in the back ground.You go about your day ect getting on with it all acepting this is how its going to be and then out of nowhere all the old fealings are back and its horrid. I think whats makeing it worse is the fact my daugher has a boyfreind hes 16 realy just a couple of years older than our son but the reality is they might as well be on different planets............and its hitting me all over againe that hes not the same that hes so so different............its hard.......... Oh well...ive stuffed me face wi a lot of chocalate...............i forced him into a bubble bath........and a small miricle took place coz he actually got a bar of soap and used it........first time ever of his own back.........and then he decied hed wash his hair wi shampoo ..........againe summet he never does wi out me doing it and a load o agro................cause it went pear shaped and he rubbed shampoo in and it went into his eyes and he went bollistick and i was to blame even though i was no where in sight...................yer cant win............ I could ###### kick him right up the chuffing ###### at times........ .but hes too bloomeing big.............. I thought he were a paine as an aspie toddler but an aspie teenager is driveing me ###### nutts. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
loobylou2 Report post Posted November 19, 2007 <'> <'> <'> <'> stick with it girl, you're doing great! just make sure you're alone when u scream or the neighbours might call the police in!!!!! Loobylou2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Paula Report post Posted November 19, 2007 When you have a weekend like that though a night in the cells becomes somewhat appealing. Rotton mother moment when he was sat in the bath with shampoo soap bubbles running down his face ranting for help coz it had gone ###### up for a nano second i thought stuff yer but i came good in the end took his abuse and raveings and helped him out not that i got any thanks.....but hey im thick skinned youve got to be. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hev Report post Posted November 19, 2007 defintely got to be thick skinned havent we!!!!steves been up my mums for 2 days,first thing he done when he saw me was called me an old wotsit(not the crisp but you get my meaning!!!!)oh happy days!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Flora Report post Posted November 19, 2007 (edited) Paula <'> I'm so with you on this. Bill wants to know 'why do I need to have a shower?' I tell him because he stinks and he says 'well I can't smell anything' The other day I told him to have a shower, and he says 'I've already had one this week'.... I was not amused... which is a pity because he WAS joking but it went right over my head I started to laugh and I said to him 'you see these tears? they aren't laughter tears, my eyes are watering because of the pong' I've bought him for Christmas this great sign to put on his door... it's a skull and cross bone and says 'Beware all ye who enter here' As far as I'm concerned, teenage boys (whatever their variety) are really icky until they discover girls!!!!! Flora Edited November 19, 2007 by Flora Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Clare63 Report post Posted November 19, 2007 Yeah agree with you there Flora.....they just sound typical teenage boys. Don't beat yourself up Paula your doing a great job, you never know in a couple of years he could be just like your daughter's boyfriend, my motto is never say never ! <'> Clare x x x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Paula Report post Posted November 21, 2007 Like my daughters boyfreind.........not sure if i should reveal this but what the hell...........My daughters boyfreind hes 16 decided hed have a bubble bath with me daughter in the bath with him whilst we were out one sunday morning............They like to keep clean and smelling nice but with a twist............. You should have seen there faces when i twigged what the young ###### had been up to and decided to knickname him Bubbles for a whole week...........I didnt half laugh at them both.........teenagers hey. My son insists if its rained hes had a wash coz hes had contact with water.................. Thing is though i no longer have to wipe his great big hairy backside after hes gone to the loo............thank god.............he now uses a sponge and water to do this.hes got "issues" god knows what ..........and beleive me ive asked surrounding toilet paper and wet wipe things but i can live with a sponge............Ive had to warn all visitors to never ever ever evr touch the sponge placed on the window ledge next to the toilet.............. The shame inflicted be that sponge thankyou my son. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
smiley Report post Posted November 22, 2007 and decided to knickname him Bubbles for a whole week...........I didnt half laugh at them both.........teenagers hey. Paula Bubbles! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shortcake Report post Posted November 22, 2007 (edited) I remember my brothers as teenagers they were stinkin s*ds wore the same underwear for days and i swear they aways had skidys, Ryan is nearly nine and loves nothing more than wandering around in his manky Y fronts (wont wear boxers oh have i tried) with a wet patch on the crotch area and a strange patch on the back when i point it out he can see no harm and a major row erupts over said pants cant wait for the teenage years I really dont envy you paula I satute you!!! <'> Edited November 22, 2007 by shortcake Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
soraya Report post Posted November 25, 2007 OMG you could be talking about my Nick, he wont wash his hair or have a hair cut, he looks like the wild man of Borneo!!! His bedroom stinks, and he wont use soap!! Arnt we all a lucky band of moms!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bard Report post Posted November 25, 2007 Mine would live in the bath, given the choice. He's hard to get out. which is a problem, as we've only got the one bathroom and toilet. He can be in there for hours, I've had to use underhand tactics to get him out as he's bigger than me. Hates showers, can't play with toys in them, and he feels unstable standing on a smooth surface. I haven't checked his Christmas list recently, but I bet his own bath is on there. It was last year! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hev Report post Posted November 25, 2007 my steven is like bards son and loves baths,he stays in there for ages,he chucks water over his head constantly,floor is soaking wet but it keeps him happy Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oxgirl Report post Posted November 25, 2007 Yep, Jay is another who loves his bath. Could stay in for an hour easily, playing happily with his fish and whales and stuff. Can't trust him with the shampoo bottle, though, 'cos he always fills it with water, even though we make him buy a new one with his own pocket money, he still insists on doing it. Can't bring myself to give him a load of emply bottles to play with in the bath though, not at 14, although he'd be in bathtime heaven if I did!! ~ Mel ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Clare63 Report post Posted November 25, 2007 Like my daughters boyfreind.........not sure if i should reveal this but what the hell...........My daughters boyfreind hes 16 decided hed have a bubble bath with me daughter in the bath with him whilst we were out one sunday morning............They like to keep clean and smelling nice but with a twist............. You should have seen there faces when i twigged what the young ###### had been up to and decided to knickname him Bubbles for a whole week...........I didnt half laugh at them both.........teenagers hey. My son insists if its rained hes had a wash coz hes had contact with water.................. Thing is though i no longer have to wipe his great big hairy backside after hes gone to the loo............thank god.............he now uses a sponge and water to do this.hes got "issues" god knows what ..........and beleive me ive asked surrounding toilet paper and wet wipe things but i can live with a sponge............Ive had to warn all visitors to never ever ever evr touch the sponge placed on the window ledge next to the toilet.............. The shame inflicted be that sponge thankyou my son. I shouldn't laugh Paula, but it did tickle me, bless him Bubbles, least he's clean though I guess. What is it about toilet paper my son won't use it either but will only use a certain supermarket brand wet wipe !!!! I daren't mention the sponge he'd probably think thats a great idea !!!!!!!!! Someone else mentioned the wild man of Borneo..... yeap that's my boy ! Clare x x x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
stressedmumto2 Report post Posted November 25, 2007 My son will happily stay in the bath for hours but he's not washing himself just ducking his head under and seing how long he can stay under for!!! He's 9 now and I am really pushing him hard now to try and wash. The bestthing I done was when I moved into this house got the bathroom walls and floor tiled, if I didn't we wouldn't have a ceiling in their now!!! He would only wear pants for ages and then one day come home from school insisting that he only ever wanted to wear boxers, so that's it now he wears boxers although he doesn't like to change them too often Bubbles, that has made me laugh Take care Paula, that fact that he's using a sponge now shows that you're doing a great job <'> <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
purplegail Report post Posted November 26, 2007 Hiya I have a female teenage aspie and I know how you feel - i do chocolate , booze and antidepressants plus counselling but none of it seems to help some days. I see other teenagers and know that my 16 year old daughter is poles apart and will never be fully and happily independant of me and the years ahead seem miserable because '' everything is ALWAYS my fault'' and I am ''not as good'' as the Dad who sees her for a couple of hours each week and refuses to move to a place that allows pets - she would stay over then but needs her dog with her at all times!!!! At the doctors surgery the other day, I met a girl I used to go to Brownies with - many, many, many, years ago. Or so it feels like!!!! She has spina bifida and has spent her entire life in a wheelchair and her parents have spent those years caring for her. They are a 'permanent 3some' I bump into them periodically and they always ask how I'm doing and are the most pleasant family ever. It really made me think that however bad things seem at times, I have to focus on the positve. Laura can do so much for herself and when she's in a 'good mood' - getting a little bit more frequent as we progress through the teenage hormonal years - she can be fairly pleasant to live with. I may have to ring her whenever I'm out, or every breaktime at work but I CAN go out. Mind you, I am still very angry at what little help is available for our children and their families but, in line with my new positive thinking - helped along by 'The Little Book of Calm'' - I'm trying not to dwell on that either. I hope you have some better, more stressful days this week. Like someone else said - don't scream too loud when the neighbours are about!!!! Have a rant on here where we ALL understand. <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> Gail Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hectorshouse Report post Posted November 26, 2007 Its has been eons since I posted on here, but I lurk regulary, I have total empathy for how you feel, My T is now 14 and driving me slowly round the bend, we have been to hell and back with schools and LEA's, finally got provision and schooling sorted, SServices came and then disappeared into the mists *sigh*. Now I have a big and strong aspie, who always argued black was white and vice a versa, but now is constantly on the back argument game ... everyday see's a new conflict, I've tried ignoring, i'v tried patient and funny, but everyday it changes, sometimes i'm better at not letting it get to me than others, but it can be soooooo soul destroying. And for those that say aspie's don't lie ... hmmmmmmmm if only that was true of T ... he has in the last year become proficient in the extreme, or maybe his reality is just not in tune with mine anymore. It makes me sad to be in a constant war zone again .. i feel that we have gone backwards to behaviour problems before dx, and everything I have learnt doesnt work anymore ... Today was a bad day, and yep I think the neighbours heard us again ... *sigh* There are good days though ... but on the bad days they are hard to remember. HHXX Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Paula Report post Posted November 28, 2007 <'> <'> <'> Thanks for all youre in put and collective screams.......and the odd bragging about bathing and being clean god i envy you.................... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
