First steps to help my 2 year old?

[cajunjay1]

Hi

 

My son has never really met any milestones upto his 2nd birthday, he was a late crawler and walker but now he has great motor skills but does not say any words and lives in a dream like state. He rarely makes any eye contact with me or my wife and is very hyperactive and cannot sit still for 1 second the only way to calm him is to put on the TV.

 

We just got back from seeing a specialist doctor who has sent us (tomorrow) to have blood tests done to see if anything can be found out that way and he also did mention the possibility of autism, which me and my wife have expected for a very long time.

 

Our health visitor came yesterday with a lady who does a 2 year check up and they just dont seem to understand that he isnt normal and keep saying he is just delayed and will catch up soon but they do not see him for very long and he was tired so not as hyperactive as normal when they saw him. They did try some toys with him but as usual showed no interest but to throw the toys or put them in his mouth.

 

I decided a few weeks ago to do as much research as possible into early interventions and any ways to help lesson his autistic behavior and hopefully get him more focused and learning.

 

 

He just loves cows milk and yogurt and it is pretty hard getting him to eat different foods and i have now realised he mostly wants to eat any foods that have alot of gluten and or casein. So yday we stopped his large intake of cows milk and tried him with coconut milk which he didnt like that much but did drink it.

 

Today which is his first day without gluten or caseine products he is acting a little more disconnected than usual even more in his own world, right now he is lying down on his back doing noting almost just staring into space. Is it usual that he will have strange behavior during the first few days of his diet change.

 

Any other tips or information to help us out would be much appreciated I just weant whats best for my son and want to get the help early as the NHS help is fair but very slow and for some reason they are trying to brush it all off as a delay.

 

(We live with our kids 24/7 so we know better and can tell when something isnt right with them)

 

 

 

Thanks

[Noskcaj86]

Hi,

We have been having the same problem as you with our health visitor, she only sees our son for 5 mins at a time and doesnt see the behaviour we see. She agreed hes delayed but said he would catch up (hes 4 and still hasnt) , she basically laughed at us when we suggested autism (even though its in my side of family)! She did a home visit and stayed a lot longer last month, about 30-40 mins and this time she saw what ive been trying to tell her for the last 2 years. Seems so hard to get through to HV and others. Our son is 4 and still not assessed, although hes had lots of tests for metabolic conditions that cause delays and hes had hearing tests and eeg's and so far all normal. Pushing for him to get assessed for autism now. Hv said she would talk to our pead, finally, so hopefully we can get him referred! Good luck

[justine1]

Thee best advice I can give you is to put aside you worries about autism,look at what he can do rather than what he can't and teach him things just like any other child. I have two boys with ASD,their development differed so much and they are two very different personalities. Dan(6) did not talk in sentences until 3-3.5 years old,now he does not stop talking. He used to have huge eating problems to the point where he was constantly fainting and his skin was almost tansparent,although he still has a limited diet he does eat far better since starting full time school. Its all about perseverence and consistency. Read to your child,talk to your child it may seem as though they are not listening but believe me they are absorbing everything!

 

Its only when they are in year 1 that its much clearer where the difficulties lie and much easier to get the help as you will have more backup from teachers. Just don't do so much research that you forget the basics of being a parent.

[trekster]

'dietary interventions and autism' by rosemary keswick is a book aimed at parents trying this intervention.

 

im a moderator on gf/cf/msgf/aspartame and other dietary interventions group. pm me for details. im also off those foods.

[cajunjay1]

Hi again

 

I assure you my wife and I spend countless hours each day trying to teach things to him but we are starting to feel very disheartened. The reason being he has not learnt anything at all. I have a soft football from ikea and teach him to kick it by showing him what to do and even using his leg with myhand to kick it and have tried this for many months but he still cannot understand what to do.

 

This is just one of dozens of things we have tried to teach him but he has not grasped anything whatsoever now I just don't know what we can do.

[oxgirl]

Hi Cajunjay1, you and your wife are doing all the right things. I know it's very frustrating when you're so worried and it feels like you're not being taken seriously. It sounds as if the assessments you've had so far are going in the right direction, it could be that the HV doesn't want to worry you too much at this early stage. Some people feel that reassuring parents is the best thing to do when really all you want is frank honesty. My lad is now nearly 19 and I felt that I was constantly being brushed off and reassured, when all I wanted was for someone to actually listen to me, so I do remember what it is like. I know that when little ones are very young then professionals like to take it slowly and it is much easier to see signs of autism when a child is a little older. My lad was 4 when investigations began and they said he was very young even then.

 

I hope you get the answers you're looking for soon, but just keep on doing what you are doing.

 

All the best.

~ Mel ~

[Shnoing]

... He just loves cows milk and yogurt and it is pretty hard getting him to eat different foods and i have now realised he mostly wants to eat any foods that have alot of gluten and or casein. So yday we stopped his large intake of cows milk and tried him with coconut milk which he didnt like that much but did drink it.

 

Today which is his first day without gluten or caseine products he is acting a little more disconnected than usual even more in his own world, right now he is lying down on his back doing noting almost just staring into space. Is it usual that he will have strange behavior during the first few days of his diet change.

...

Does your doc know about that change in his diet? I think you should ask him/her - your son might need some supplements, e.g. calcium.

About the gluten-free diet: our son is on one, and that's because his stool got all slimy, which is a heavy indicator. If he just stopped eating gluten (etc.), I'd advise you to have a blood sample taken NOW, and to have it tested re. allergies etc., because you won't get results after the diet has gone on for some time - and I'm sure you'll want to know whether or not he's allergic to gluten or else.

[LisaKaz75]

It is very frustrating, We suspected our son at 2 and were often poo pood by the professionals.

 

In the end we pushed our GP for speech and language therapy, and she then decided he needed an autism assessment and started the ball rolling with the paediatricans

 

It is very frustrating, we spent hours and still do going over and over things, but think about it if you dont understand and cant communicate you own little world is a safe haven. Speech therapy helped us. It helped us to simplify and helped him to learn some very basic tools. He is not at the same level as his peers, but at nearly 5 we can communicate with him

 

Re things like kicking a ball my son could not do this till 4, he could throw but never kick, he also did not like walking up and down stairs and like ride on toys. it was felt that he just felt happier with 2 feet on the ground and was unsure if he felt off balance

 

Try some other activities, dont try and stop him being in his world but join it. If he loves cars for example get on the floor join in and then try things like rolling the car up his back and see if you can get a reaction off him, or for him to do the same

 

We went on a course run by our childrens development centre and used by speech therapist called More than Words - by Sussman. We actually found this really good (you can buy the book) It explains the different stages of development and interaction and gives lots of sound advice

 

All you can do is keep trying and I remember clearly at 2 how disheartened we were and we sometimes have these feelings today. but then we look back at where we have come from and he is progressing in his own way

 

LisaKaz