really lost it with E.P.

[LKS]

Have been waiting to speak to E.P.for ages regarding my daughter. Had a meeting with SENCO class teacher and 2 assistants. Senco said they were having a lot of trouble differentiating lessons particularly science history and geography. The E.P. had mentioned to me about the school using outreach support staff. So conversation started well and she explained how school staff could visit where these outreach teachers taught or in some circumstances they could come out and visit the schools where the children concerned are. She asked why I wanted to know and I reminded her of what she had suggested. She replied I think you will find that the school are doing everything possible to differentiate lessons and really outreach staff would not tell the SENCO anything she didn't know anyway. I told her that she was the one who had mentioned it first and that the SENCO had said to me they are having difficulties. E.P. replied that school had not mentioned any problems to her and that it was her responsibility to make recommendations. She said that it should not really be any concern of mine what difficulties the staff were having with teaching. I had also been told by parent partnership about a team that looks at specific learning difficulties particularly in numeracy and maths. The E.P. said that this team were really brought in to test for dyslexia and that my daughter doesn't have that. I asked whether they might be able to make suggestions to the school for my daughter who is 8 and is now about 3 years behind in reading she said again that they wouldn't be able to suggest anything the SENCO didn't already know. By this time the conversation was becoming a bit animated. The E.P. said what is it you are asking me to do, I said I'm not asking you to do anything I was querying whether there might be more help available in the borough, as my daughter is quote the most severe case of learning disability that the school have ever had. She said you can trust the school that they are doing everything they can and I really think you are getting involved in aspects of your child's education that don't really concern you. Well thanks for putting me in my place Ms. E.P. and giving me the official line on what is thought of parents getting involved. She really really annoyed me and I'm going to find it very difficult to speak to her in the future. But there you have it, in my borough at least the schools are doing everything they should be doing and we should kindly butt out

[annie]

LKS <'> <'> <'> <'>

 

I've just come on here quickly, but you know what I think of our LEA

 

Annie

<'> <'>

[helenl53]

Hi LKS - we could almost be in the same Borough - but this attitude stinks.

 

It is not about ###### egos - it is about meeting the needs of kids (something they seem to forget).

 

In all of the documentation and policy handed down from Government, Parents are deemed to be the most important influence and partner in their childs future and their education.

 

I do not want to be an Ed Psycho, nor a Teacher, nor a Senco or a TA, but I do want to work collaboratively with them almost the same way that husbands and wives work together. We all have our roles.

 

This Ed Psycho obviously needs to go into some intensive therapy and she obviously has issues that she has failed to deal with! - Don't let her rattle you.

 

Chip, chip, chip.

 

Love

 

HelenL

[Hectorshouse]

OH MY GOD!!!!!!!

 

... I'm almost lost for words ....

 

This woman is talking out of her ar*e ....

 

it was her responsibility to make recommendations - yes is ###### well is and to LISTEN to the concerns of the Parent.

 

She said that it should not really be any concern of mine what difficulties the staff were having with teaching. - Oh yes it is!!! it is YOUR child and the school are answerable to you if you have concerns about how they are being taught!

 

I asked whether they might be able to make suggestions to the school for my daughter who is 8 and is now about 3 years behind in reading she said again that they wouldn't be able to suggest anything the SENCO didn't already know. - well if they doing such a good job they wouldn't be having problems in the first place, and your daughter would be IMPROVING in her literacy ... durrr!!!

 

She said you can trust the school that they are doing everything they can and I really think you are getting involved in aspects of your child's education that don't really concern you. - how dare she! how did you keep from ringing her neck, you are exactly entitled to get involved in ALL aspects of your childs education ESPECIALLY when they have SEN.

 

LKS don't take this lying down, she had no right to talk to you like this

 

the code say this ...

 

Key principles in communicating and working in partnership with parents.

 

2:6 Positive attitudes to parents, user-friendly information and procedures and awareness of support needs are important. There should be no presumption about what parents cannot do to support their children's learning. Stereotypic veiws of parents are unhelpful and should be challenged. All staff should bear in mind the pressures a parent may be under because of the childs needs.

 

2:7 To make communication effective professionals should:

 

- acknowledge and draw on parentl knowledge and expertise in relation to their child.

 

- focus on the children's strengths as well as areas of additional need.

 

- recognise the personal and emotional investment of parents and be aware fo their feelings.

 

- ensure that parents understand procedures, are aware of how to access support in preparing their contributions, and are given documents to be discussed well before meetings.

 

- respect the validity of differing perspectives and seek constructive ways of reconciling different view points.

 

etc .. etc ..

 

go dig out your code and remind the EP in writing of what ACTUALLY IS your right to get involved in all aspects of your childs education...

 

Sorry for the rant, but this is outrageous.

 

(hug) for you as well, I think I would've broken down in floods by now, but my blood is up at the moment.

 

Hhxx

[Tez]

I was spoken to in a similar manner by the Head of Home and Hospital. I was discussing this with an Educational professional today and was told it's called "blustering" in the Educational profession. Basically you know the parent's right, you haven't got the resources to do anything about it, you try to put the parent in their place in the hope that they drop the whole matter. Well, it might work on some, but its wrong and doesn't solve your child's problem. I'd make an official complaint and ask that the matter of your daughter's SEN needs are looked at again.

[Elanor]

Hi

 

This is outrageous - but don't just complain here, complain to her bosses. There's clearly no point in trying to be cooperative with her, so go above her head. The sooner you do it the better (but make sure you check your letter after you've calmed down!).

 

Elanor

[LKS]

thanks everyone. Thank god I've got here to rant on first. Of all the c**p I've listened to from so called educational professionals I have to say that I think today was the most angry and upset I've been so far. I was completely thrown by this conversation. You know sometimes when you are expecting something confrontational because you are about to complain, well today I was after advice to see if there was anything she could suggest that wasn't being done. After all the juniors have never had to teach anyone that couldn't read before, so how are they supposed to know what to do. So all this b******s that the LEA gave me about the experts out there willing and able to offer advice on how to support a child with SEN in mainstream ain't going to happen. I know the senior E.P. as she was the one who originally assessed my daughter, so I think I will write to her. This a***y E.P. is attached to the school now, how am I ever going to be able to speak to her again. If a child is so far behind with their reading would anyone trust a SENCO to be up to date on everything that was available.As I'm sure I've already said this is the SENCO who didn't give parents copies of I.E.Ps as she thought it wasn't necessary. I shall be hitting the beer early tonight

[helenl53]

This is a question that someone in the know may be able to answer ---- If you are not confident with the views of the EP or any other professional dealing with your child, are you able to ask for someone else?

 

I am going to be in the same boat. EP at Tribunal was very badly behaved and also contradicted her written reports and so I have no confidence about professionalism.

 

Can LKS and anyone else who are not confident and happy with a professional, ask for someone else to be allocated the case?

 

Best wishes

 

HelenL

 

PS - It really grieves me that there are so many wonderful people out there who support our kids and who support us as parents and give us the credit for knowing our kids - and then you get these complete hard hearted imbeciles who can cause untold damage who are out there, day in and day out.

[oracle]

We have recently began this outrageous system of referal in our Authority for our Outreach Team. We all know that these Psyco's (will always be grateful to Helen for alerting me to this very apt name) are only there to make sure the LEA do not spend anymore of their precious money on our kids. Our system worked really well until this system kicked in in September and I am now having calls from parents who are being kept waiting until a Psyco has visited their school.

 

As well as this I was told yesterday by another parent who has taken her daughter out of school dinners because this four year old is self-harming that our head EP has asked when will she be returning the child to dinners because it is in her best interests to be included in the dinning hall where she will learn to socalise.

 

I did not know whether to or go find the woman and beat her with a big stick

 

Do these people actually know anything?

 

Carole

[helenl53]

Carole, unfortunately I think you are right about them matching the child to what the LEA will provide.

 

One of my mums has her son home - he has been excluded as he stabbed another child in the back with a pencil. Ok sound horrid - but the boy is obsessed with this other child and instead of professionals helping, they observed, deduced that he possibly now has OCD and have recommended that the family go to a parenting type class. I have told her that she must ask them what they will do for his obsessive behaviour. There has been no mention whatsoever about help for this young lad.

 

It is quite frightening seeing the pattern emerging of - child presents with problems, - professionals reaction- quick, get the parents into parenting class and shift the blame.

 

I have seen it happening over the last few months with families in our area and it would be interesting to hear from some of the parents on this forum.

 

Best wishes

 

HelenL

[LittleRae]

 

There is NO aspect of YOUR child's education which does not concern YOU!

 

What a stupid thing for her to say...

[LKS]

yes D's mum I think stupid is one word, but lots of others spring to mind as well I am about to compose my letter of complaint to her which is going to be copied to the principal ed. pyscho. I have started dear **** I hate you and you made me cry Any constructive (or not) ideas greatly appreciated.

[Hectorshouse]

I would definitely quote the code of practice in your letter, inform them of how distressed this meeting made you feel, and ask them to rectify this matter as a matter of some urgency. I would also give them a 15 day time limit to respond, and if they don't make a formal complaint to the LEA, include that bit as well. I'll email something I've found the other day, written by another parent, but I think you could adapt it to what your doing, it was really good and definitely gets the point across.

 

HHxx