NT siblings copying autistic traits

[Lynden]

My NT daughter is 3.5 years old and she has started to mimic some of Logans autistic traits, such as rocking, flapping etc. She doesn't do it consistently but I'm not sure how to react when she does - should I ignore? tell her to stop?

 

Also, we're having a bit of a time of it at the moment with her being incredibly clingy towards me. She's old for her 3.5 years and has always been incredibly bright and independent so I think we've always expected so much from her, but its starting to tell now and I think she is feeling a little left out because Logan has so many hospital appointments, and so many therapists coming to see him, and of course people always ask how he is doing. I make sure that she and I spend some time together at the weekend, and my husband does the same (he works in London mon-fri) but its difficult. We also try and include her in Logans therapies. Any other gems on how to make it easier for siblings? specially young ones.

 

Thanks

Lynne x

[DaisyProudfoot]

When my nephew was younger my sister was concerned about some of his mannerisms and behaviour and there were noises about Aspergers being thrown about. He didn't have it and it's pretty obvious now that he never did have.

 

Then a few years later my own son was dx'd and this explained her son's behaviour (who is younger than my AS son by about 3 years). My nephew dotes on my AS son, always has done, he does the same things, eats the same things - just because Martin does.

 

I think it's probably quite normal - monkey see, monkey do.

[curra]

Hi Llaverty,

 

I think that your daughter could be copying her brother's behaviour in order to attract your attention. She may feel that her brother gets a lot of attention from you with his behaviour, so she is obviously trying to be like him. I have an only child but I have noticed this situation among siblings at the support group where I go with my son. I think that spending some extra time alone with her particularly after she has behaved the way you expect her to (not so much after she has copied her AS sibling) may give her the right message.

 

Hope this helps a bit

Gloria <'>

[minerva]

I have found that my youngest has started to copy things too, at the moment it seems to only be the taking his shoes off in the most awkward places.

 

I mean obviously its more comfortable to have them off but we cant all go about bear foot in a restaurant (can we?) perhaps i'll have to start taking them to the chinese ones where you have to, then it wont look odd when they do it! lol

Edited November 20, 2005 by minerva

[sarahjane]

Hi

 

I am having a very similar problem with my 4 year old boy. He has started to copy some of H "tricks" at first I found it very difficult to see what was copying and thinking maybe he has traits to. But it obvious at other times he hasn't got as. It is hard when younger one only has a sibling with AS as they are bound to copy all younger siblings copy their older ones. The latest is both refusing to put clothes with labels on and C is almost as fussy as H about eating although I know when H is not about C will eat anything- it is v frustrating!

 

C is also showing lots of attention seeking behaviour and he is much more difficult at the mo than his older as brother. I don't know what the answer is I try to spend equal time with both and encourage c to be his own person and show him ways he is an individual,

[helenl53]

My son is 9 and I have noticed the boys in his class all come out of school at the end of the day making the same playstation car noises and doing the hands and other little things that my son does. I watched three of them walking in a train the other day, and all following the same steps, making the same sounds and showing the same mannerisms.

 

I did wonder if there was a classful of kids with undx'd ASD - how spooky would that be - but no - it is just that the boys like to copy my son.

 

I spoke to his Sen Tutor and she said that the staff have mentioned that all the kids have picked up his mannerisms. Woops - but hey there are a lot worse things they could pick up.

 

I think it is a natural thing to pick up mannerisms and accents and not anything to worry about, but I suppose it is always worthwhile keeping an eye on it just to make sure it is copying.

 

Best wishes

 

HelenL

[hev]

katie is 2 and when steve slams doors and chucks things so does she then i end up moaning at both of them,then i feel guilty cos shes copying him and hes just frustrated i might just copy them when they both start,i think they would be shocked and stop!

[minerva]

LOL

 

have you seen that new advert for vicks cold stuff? attack is the best form of defence, when the woman throws herself on the floor in the shop & has a tantrum....i love that ad!! The amount of times i've felt like doing that lol

[rainbow queen]

theres only 18 months between my sons -and 4 year old has the probs but 3 year old is now doing same things cause he thinks its normal behaviour-its dreadfull 2 of them at it-really grinds u down.

[virtualvisual]

theres only 18 months between my sons -and 4 year old has the probs but 3 year old is now doing same things cause he thinks its normal behaviour-its dreadfull 2 of them at it-really grinds u down

 

There is 13 months between my 3 eldest so I know exactly how you feel rainbow. A has AS and then theres the twins R and J. We are only just beginning to sort out the copied behaviour from J's own problems. R is completely NT but even at nearly 12 years old she still lapses into behaviour shes learnt from the boys.

 

Most of the early years is a blur but I have vivid memories of going shopping one day and all three of them throwing temper tantrums in a shop, the girl on the till said "if you don't shut them up I will" I said "go ahead then" and walked out the shop door Took me 5 minutes of sobbing before I could walk back in again but the kids didn't even notice I'd gone. Think I lost the plot there somewhere

[forbsay]

My little girl copies some of her asd brother's traits - i tend just to ignore them as i think she thinks she is playing a game with him!