Home school diary question..

[Tylers-mum]

My son used to have a home school diary that his previous LSA used to fill in recording what went on in school that day, the good and bad of T's behaviour etc etc, this stopped some weeks before his LSA left in October (he has a new LSA now). I fought and begged for it to be reinstated but both his teacher and SENCO were against it saying that he can tell you himself. When I said 'No he cannot', her response was, 'well, neither can most children at 6yrs of age'.

Now we have a dx of HFA, I listed it in my Annual Review parental report form (or should I say novel! ) Now I know that come tomorrow morning, they'll ask again why I feel the need for it and I know that what I have said to them many a time before about him not being able to tell me himself (his usual answer is 'I don't know Mum' or his new one is 'I can't remember') will once again fall on deaf ears.

Can anyone please advise me on some responses I can give that'll knock em to the floor! LOL

[adamsmum]

Hi adam has a book like that. It's not much to ask of them to writ you a couple of lines it's part of ther job. It's helpfull for you both you need to knoww howw he's been. ask them if thay find the book to much trouble do thay wont you to call them daily for an update point out that it's within you'r rights to be kept informed

[something_different]

u can say its the only way you know how your son's day has been and what he has been doing. sorry i have nothing better to offer

[helenl53]

It is an important part of support for you and your child and I would be firm with them that they are not working in partnership with you if they refuse to do this simple thing. Home/school liason is important and Good Practice. Refer them to the Autistic Spectrum Disorders - Good Practice Guidance issued by the Dfes!!! He may be unhappy/ sad/ scared and not able to tell you or anyone else what has triggered the feelings and the Diary may be the only way of you knowing. It could be something as simple as a visitor to the classroom that set him off or he achieved something and it made him really happy.

 

I would also ask them to divide the day up into pre break, pre lunch etc so that if there are difficulties, you may be able to see a pattern emerge. It could be that the stress of the cloakroom makes athe beginning of the day a nightmare and the end of the day ditto - but you will not be able to pinpoint things without knowing.

 

You could even get your child to put a smiley on the periods as well - if there is a sad face, then they can maybe establish the problem and remedy it before it gets out of hand.

 

I used to have this arguement with my son's old school - if you ask my lad how school was - he will always say fine - he does not understand what is being asked - we know that we mean the whole day - to our kids - we could be talking about the building for all they know. The question is way way too big.

 

Hope this helps

 

HelenL

[Suze]

...............ooohhh this makes my blood boil.My son has one , it isn,t always filed in but can be in-valuable.I would ,in a very firm ,composed voice ............list these reasons, a picture of his day gives you an invaluable insight into his anxiety levels , gives you the oppurtunity to discuss school issues with him and develop social stories at home to help him cope.Gives you the oppurtunity to talk about and reward good work and behaviour.Gives you the ability to pin point from problems at school , when things could be getting too much for him. It will hi-light bullying issues if a diary is used.If you fill the diary in at home it also gives the school the oppurtunity to gage wether he may have a bad day at school.They can record if he ate his dinner, .............can,t think of anything else ..........hope someone else has some ideas.I,m sure Phasmid will come along in a mo and save the day .Suzex.

[Helen]

TM, you have a PM.

[call me jaded]

1) Your child has a communication difficulty that is part of his diagnosis

2) The school is supposed to be working in partnership with parents

3) Under the Disability Discrimination Act there is a duty for the school to make reasonable adjustments. Why is this an unreasonable adjustment, and can you have the reasons in writing?

 

That should do it.

[OPooh]

My son got a home/school diary for this reason (I suggested it to the senco). She thought it such a good idea that this other lad was given one too. It was fine until they had a new teacher this year - and she;s like he don't need one. TBH I just don't think the teacher wants to find the time to fill it in

 

Good luck with it.....I'm going to mention it to the ed psych tomorrow.

[elainem]

can only add to the other replies - it also provides an opportunity for YOU to flag up to school potential flashpoints. AND for school to engage your help in preparing eg for forthcoming events. It alows you both to share ideas and strategies for dealin with poential and actual problems.

 

Elaine

[mossgrove]

Tm

 

You need it because T cannot tell you how the day went or if any incidents have occurred and is unable to pass messages to his teacher on your behalf, so a Home/School book helps everyone, you, the teachers, the LSA and T.

 

 

Simon

[Steve_colour-se7en]

Hello everyone,

 

As a person with AS even I can see here that the information given by call me jaded should, no WILL when dished out by Tylers-mum knock em to the floor! as she put's it . well said call me jaded great advice.

best of luck tommorrow Tylers-mum

 

Steve..

 

I think the boy means well but he is distinctly inclined to be inattentive......

Tutor of Winston Churchill to Lord Randolph Churchill,

Winston's father

Edited January 10, 2006 by Steve_colour-se7en

[LKS]

Tylers mum on your behalf. Sounds like not only do the school not understand your sons disability, they don't understand the average NT 6 year old When my son was in year 4 I asked for one of these home/school link book. The head wouldn't agree as he thought most of the comments in it would b negative How sad for my son. My daughter had one all through the infants and I insisted that it was continued in the juniors. However they can be very crafty they tend to write in it her spellings and things she needs to remeber. If anything 'bad' has happened at school one of the lsa's comes out to tell me but I am careful I make a note and have even been known to carry a notebook into school with me now.

[KarenT]

I'm trying to get some means of communication set up for J as well, and have suggested a home/school diary but they've said no, as they only use them for 'behaviour of a poor standard'. Well that certainly fits J so my assumption from that is that they'll only use it to report negative behaviours even though I pointed out to the SENCo that doing so would reduce J's fragile self-esteem even further. Instead they've decided to give him stickers for good behaviour. Well, hang out the flags! So far since he returned on Monday there have been no stickers so obviously no good behaviour, but apparently no bad behaviour either as nobody bothers to tell me about it.

 

J never tells me anything about his school day unless I wheedle it out of him by asking what other children did, and if there's an overlap between them and him he'll talk. If (on the rare occasions he does get good-behaviour stickers) I ask him why he got them, often he can't remember and goes barmy with frustration. There's no way he'd tell me himself if he'd done anything he shouldn't but then I'd have to deal with the emotional aftermath completely blind, with no clues as to how I should reassure him. I really, really need some way of knowing, like TM does, and am furious that school are failing to comply with such a minor request. The trouble is some schools are so inflexible and set in their ways that they simply won't make the effort to change their usual way of doing things - too much hard work for some teachers.

 

Love Jaded's ideas, though we're a bit stuck as we haven't a full dx yet.

 

Karen

x

[UltraMum]

Tyler's mum - how did it go?

[Tylers-mum]

Tyler's mum - how did it go?

Not too good!

I'm on a downer tonight and have been all day, maybe post tomorrow ok. I'm so friggin pi**ed!!

[smiley]

<'> <'> <'>

[Hectorshouse]

TM <'> <'> <'> <'>

 

Hang in there, we're here for you, post when your ready.

 

HHxx

[LKS]

TM <'> <'> <'> <'> from me as well

[phasmid]

Hi T's mum. Sorry to see it doesn't appear to have gone well today. As HH says when your ready we'll be here.

[pumpkinpie]

I know how your feeling Ive been feeling rotten the last two days as a reaction to what was going on at school before xmas. Have a glass of wine like me or a big bar of choc and let us knwo how you are when youre ready xxxxxxxxxx

[UltraMum]

Have a glass of wine ... or a big bar of choc

 

Or have both! Sorry you're down will be for you - here's some hugs

 

<'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'>

[call me jaded]

Awww. Poor thing.

 

 

When you're ready we'll have a go at plan B.

[mossgrove]

TM

 

I am sorry things went badly yesterday.

 

Remember we are here when you need us!

 

<'> <'>

 

 

Simon