Malika

Hi to all. <'> Last year H was making faces behind his step-dad back and when I ask him why he said "I was just checking because Dad always says he's got eyes in the back of his head and it's not true I cannot see any" but as H is not happy with one or two answers ....the week after his teacher call me and told me that H had been very naughty all afternoon and kept making faces behind her back . I did not explain anything to her as she had already decided that H was not autistic, but when we were out I ask H " Did you want to check if Ms O... had eyes in the back of her head?" "yes" he said "but she hasn't, just other kids told her because they had been laughing too much..." I must say that I could not really tell him off just explain to him that he may get into trouble in doing this, and that human just have 2 eyes and it is just a joke. Bless them <'> Malika.

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Hi Carole, <'> it is nice to hear good news and yes all is not lost, with good will and help from the female leader Matthew will probably able to go back to the boys brigade. Best wishes and keep us posted. Malika.

Hi stresshead and welcome. <'> I have hypothyroidism and taking 100 micrograms thyroxine a day, my daughter has hyperthyroidism (Grave disease) now more or less under controle with "cabemazole" and my Gran died nearly 50 years ago following badly treated hyperthyroidism. Time ago I had put this link if you read the part about Environmental factors you will find that hypothyroidism in the mother is mention as a possible cause of autism in a child. http://www.alspac.bris.ac.uk/topics/mrc_proposal.shtml Take care. Malika.

Bunny.

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Thanks Brook!! I have to make some research now as this is exactly the description of my "NT" daughter strength and weakness. Malika.

Carrie take things easy this can be a stressful time. <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> Malika.

Hi Jenrose, <'> Sorry a bit late may be but I really feel for you and what that psychologist has said you are right to go private even if they did not have enough confirmation they could have given a DX of PDD NOS it would have been better than saying it is your fault and that you have bad parental skills I wonder if some professionals are not just trying to reduce the amount of ASD AS DX. I was lucky that the professionals were all right with me during the H assesment but instead I had to get those kind of comment from the LEA educational psychologist at least she had no power to change the DX. But that made me lose my case with the SENDIST. I am glad you can get help and support situation like this can be so upsetting. All the best. Malika.

Asparagus cupa soup with croutons... thanks!!

Arletti

Hi, I think with ASD AS children there is the experience and there is the individual abilities some children can have communication disorder but at the same time be able to remember language and learn them very quickly I remember seeing a programe about a young adult (on the spectrum) going to spend some time in Iceland and being able to start speaking and understanding the language very quickly, as for my son I felt that I had to make a choice and that it was much more useful for him to learn the language of the country he was living in that to learn the language of his parent and grand parents at the time he could say words but was unable to speak in sentence, I remember children in his class coming to me saying "What is wrong with H he cannot speak" . Letting go of my language was then not a real issue the issue was to make it easy for him to speak and be able to communicate. As for you if you want to learn French my advice would be: learn in a class for a year and then go to France for a year work there and avoid English people the result is garanted except for very rare people who cannot learn languages. If you cannot do this just go in holiday to France for 3/4 years and you should be able to make lot of progress as well with the French TV (satellite or on the net..TV 5) you can learn a great deal it is what helped me a lot when I went first to Italy then when I came to this country News programe are excellent as they are usually at a good level and you can avoid the trap to learn slang (argot) or dialect (this is more for Italy) thinking that you are actually learning standard French. All the best. Malika. PS and by the way no offence taken I understood what you meant.

Hi, This is usualy true however may differ for a child with an ASD DX who has fairly severe language delay and sensory issue making the processing of sounds confusing. Malika.

Hi call me jaded <'> I am a believer in genes implication in human character being the strongest influence, this does not remove the parents responsability just the sens of guilt, what ever the tendency of a child if the parents give a sens of approval or disaproval the child will take it on board but some fundamental aspect of his character will remain. I mean may be a child who would have some tendency to addictive substance would end up on cigarets or heroine according to the environment. What I mean is that the environment influence cannot change the persone character but can curve it what can change the character is the change in the body chemical balance and this can be connected to the environment to a certain extend. I have somebody I know well who has non-identical twins and the difference in character is very obvious one is always calm and content the other is more wingy and get upset very quickly find difficult to sleep and much more like her bigger brother who seems to have ADHD the response from the mother respective to the twins has been very similar and overall quite tense and stressful, but still the calm twin remained calm and the more agitated one remained more difficult. I think frankly that many psychologist psychanalist, are worried to lose their grip on patient (and money) if the genes theory is increasing however they could become more like counselling people helping them to deal with their difficulties taking into account their character and their situation.. The eodipien complexe seems to me now something so remote ( I always found it unsound and a kind of charlatanism) just coming from mythologic beleive. When the Freudien and Bethelein staff will be over with some good scientific discovery I surely will be rejoicing I think their theory have created so much unecessary pain that it makes me angry. Malika.

Hi to all My son definitly goes on and on about his favorite subjects (computer games mainly) he does ask questions sometimes over and over again but mainly he just talk as he knows better anyway .... and always wants to have the last word, but if I dare to ask him how was his day at school I have to hear "you already ask me this yesterday and every day it's boring!!!" Malika.

Hi kristie. I think Viper is right As well as Simon, it is really so difficult to keep the balance and most of the time we go from too strict to too lose and back, but I have realised with my daughter (14) that sometimes restrictions help her getting out of situations when she feels too much pressure but does not know how to say NO or is worried to be let down by her friends for saying NO, in fact I remember once when she did not want to go out with a groupe because they tend to get in trouble she ask me to say to the girls that she was grounded. Lately she has been band from the net for a month (mainly because of MSN) because she used to push the boundaries and stay up till 2 am, now she is back she is much more careful and it has become less of an addiction. I hope you will find the right balance with your son but please don't blame yourself it is a difficult age. Take care. Malika.

Sorry I meant he was refered age 6 and DX age 7. ..... Malika.

Hi Nikky and all, <'> I am very interested to know how things are for autistic children over there (France) I have heard that for children with AS and High functinning autism it is not so good but you probably know better from direct experience, What happened here with my son is that I had no support at all and he was not DX until he was 6 even if he had 2 and an 1/2 years speech delay at 4 1/2 reduce to 18 months delay at age 5 after speech therapy for 8 months strangely none one of the professional who approached H thoiught about autism, and it is only after I push the school and get a referal that he was DX at age 7. Even now H gets very little support at school. May be I have highjack the thread , Nikki please if you have some spare time could you send me a PM or may be we could start another thread??? Take care. Malika.

Got it wrong here missed the last two so after nurse .... hospital

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Same here those are old memories from before I had children!!!..... <'> <'> Swan.

Hi to all. I use to speak 2 languages at home English and French (French being my mother tongue) However when I realised how H was struggling and coudn't express himself I stoped speaking French at home and just encourage him to speak in English as we live here I have not regreted it as now he is speaking a very good English even if he still has pragmatics difficuties due to his autism, the one to loose out has been his sister who understand French but find difficult to speak it now. She is studing French and Spanish and is very good in both even if her French could be better. H strenghs are not languages but numbers and computer as well as drawing he think in picture and it was clear that being confronted to two languages was too much for him, some children with AS are very good with language and can learn very fast then speaking 2 languages should not be a problem even if it may lead to confusion may be at a more advance level. As for the oportunities connecting to speaking few languages I personnaly think it is over stated I speak 3 languages (French Italien and English) and know many people who speak few languages but very few manage to work with it except if they have some degree in interpretation/translation and often speak 4 to 6 or 7 languages. I think if somebody has English for mother tongue and speak additionnal languages it is good for a CV but not always use practicaly. Malika.

Sorry Well there are plenty benches in Hyde Park...............

Hyde