linss

Well done for finding out when it's on again .i rang the bbc and they didn't know!

Thanks SO much for your words of support .I'm going to speak to school tomorrow so if you see storm clouds brewing over the south west you'll know why!!! I'll let you know the out come

Immediately after the programme i rang BBC action line asking begging for a copy of the programme or at least to know when it will be on again.It was the most relevant programme i've seen to date and i'm desperate to get hold of a copy to show the teachers at my sons school. At last a real and sympathetic insight into AS.

Hi, Great website i think your amazing, keep it up

Hi, my sons teacher has just left a message on my phone saying that she'd "assumed " i'd be accompanying him on his school trip on Thursday(he's 6). When i phoned back i explained that i couldn't ,one reason being that i didn't have child care for my two year old.Can't believe it she actually told me to bring her said it would be a" great learning experience." I told her this was out of the question as we both new my son needed one to one and i couldn't do this whilst carrying a toddler, and where was his TA (which he's now got thanks to his statement) She then told me that in that case he wouldn't be able to go regardless of whether he had a TA or not as she couldn't face the risk of taking him without me. Believe me this is a huge exaggeration on her part the biggest problem we would face is him refusing to follow the other children into another area and this would be due to him having some anxiety about whats ahead. I said that i would do all i could to rearange my schedule but that wasn't it actually their responsibility to provide care for him at school now that he has his statement? She replied "We won't be in school so he's not , he's yours". AT which point i backed down !!! so it looks like i'm off to the Aqairium Please help me on this if i say no or raise an issue they just insinuate tough this is how it is! Plus there are issues i want to address with them soon about about how they've been dealing with him i'm now worried about bringing it up.

My sons school has an Inclusion Practitioner, who's there two days a week to mediate between children, parents and teachers.She's been a great support and really fights for the kids rights.Apparently in the future more and more schools will have them as we move towards inclusion (lovely word!!!) Apart from that i have a friend who just so seems to understand my son her and her husband have never looked down their nose at him or been put off by his behavior. Instead they see what we see, a boy with a lovely bright inquiring mind they support him 100% and mostly think he's in the right (which isn't always the case!) but it's nice to have someone who loves him unconditionally. We've also got new neighbours who are wonderful and enormously tolerant when my son wanders into there house and turns on the telly!!!! I gave up feeling embarrased years ago !

Grrr! blaming it on the parents ,how convenient for them!

Hi all Before i joined this forum i was confused and unsure as to whether my son had ,as. I'd read the recommended books ,been given a diagnosis although even this wasn't 100% ,read up on what it obviously wasn't.THEN i found this forum and so many of my questions have been answered from reading the day to day accounts of all of you. There's so many aspects of my sons behavior- his funny little ways - refusing to wear shoes or hiding under table that are not reffered to in the books iv'e read.So many times i sit at my lap top yelling "yes my kid does that too! "It's been such a revelation and the best help i've received to date. I remember when we received the diagnosis for my son, we were told he was a charming, bright, inquisitive boy who most likely had aspergers and If we found him "too much" would they like us to pescribe him rittalin? I couldn't believe it -they had just congratulated me on having such a lovely son and in the same breath offered him rittalin to subdue that lovely son!!! I said it wasn't an option for us at the moment but could she tell us when we would start to receive the guidance on the best ways to help and manage him. You can imagine- she just had no answer and after a moment staring at her feet told me there was nothing! Looking back i realise how naive i was and how much i've learnt about the system. I did however let her know that parents don't just want a diagnosis or medication we want to know how to help our kids, there's loads of extremely effective stategies out there that will make a huge difference to families ,thats what we should be focussing on.I was really pleased to see that the two junior doctors who were present were nodding enthusiasticaly in aggrement - so maybe there's hope for the future Hooray for forums and other parents

hi,mother in need , Really glad for you, it feels great doesn't it ! My sons statement came through a few weeks ago after being turned down the first time. It's also come at the same time as his diagnosis(aspergers). So this is all a steep learning curve Let me know how your getting on will be really helpful to share info <'>

yeah he remembered right away , hope it has the same effect with a piece of fruit !!!

Hi, Lorraine i really feel for feel for you it sounds like you've been through so much. I'm new to this forum and am so sadened at the struggles we all face. How old is your son? ithink he sound a lovely lad.Sending you one of these <'>

Hi all, tried something new with my son yesterday that really worked so thought i'd share it with you. My sons six and going into the playground every morning is a potential nightmare he usually goes bonkers running after all the kids swinging his book bag at them and generally being too much -all in front of the other mums which isn't ideal as they love a cause for a good grumble about him and here's the perfect chance to do it in a group and share their grievances !!! So as you can imagine i've been trying to find a way to keep him closer to me whilst we wait for the bell! Well yesterday as we were approaching the playground my little lad asked if i could bring him something nice to eat after school. I told him i would bring him something he loved to eat but first i was going to spell it and he had to guess what it was. To my suprise he loved this idea and stood beside me in the playground trying to guess. Meanwhile the other kids in his class were swinging their book bags around -he went over to them about to join in but was still desperate to guess the word so he came right back. The other kids then came over and joined in guessing too. It was a great chance for them to interact with my son and see him acting calmly. He then gussed the word -( Pepperarmi in case you were wondering!) and went in to the class totally happy It was great to come away from school feeling i'd done something good for him!

Hi, i thought that once a child received a statement then we could choose their school?Am i wrong on this

I admire her for having the courage to keep going and refusing to accept less than what she feels her child deserves.Saying that though in practice i have found the "softly softly catchy monkey" approach works for me. When other parents at school were constantly complaining about my son it definately worked in my favour that i was the parent who had the good relationship with the school. I've found putting my point across in a calm, polite way has been my best weapon.

Hi,Daisy just read your message and wondered what the outcome was? My son has said the same things to me about exclusion he's only 6 doesn't take them long to catch on does it!

hi mel, hope your having a nice day.

I find that i have permanant butterflies in my stomach ,taking my son to school and picking him up occupy my thoughts all day. Really stupid i know i'm not the one at school! One thing i do find really helps is to arrange something nice for yourself - last night i went to the cinema to see "Pride and Prejudice".it was great and the best thing about it was that i'd been looking forward to it all day it helps to counteract the worries.

hi ,i went on antidepessants recently after going to my lovely doctor who's known my son since he was a baby.i'm a really upbeat positive gal but recently i've been sinking under the weight of it all, and couldn't pull myself together anymore. What's hard in this situation is that there's no break, you have to be supportive mummy going to meetings ,making endless phone calls , listening patiently to teacher every day while she tells me about her hard day! and most especially being there for my son - so i suppose somethings got to give!!! Couldn't carry on without a good cup of tea though

Hi everyone, i'm new to all this and have found reading about everything so informative and supportive.My hubby and i have two children a girl of 2 and a little lad of 6 who has recently been diagnosed with Aspergers. We really enjoy our kids and yes our son is extremely difficult at times but we are really learning to celebrate his ways.There's a time when acceptance comes along and we realise now he's not going to suddenly "snap out of it" and be like every other kid. What i find that does constantly get me down is school ,we try so hard to be positive but the constant doom and gloom and throw away comments from teachers is so hard to take.

Thanks Annie i'm off to bed feeling much rosier , Lins

hi,suze i've been going through much the same problems with school as you. After an incident of hitting out etc how your school reprimand your son? I'm trying to work out whether the school my son is at is dealing with him in the most effective way(he's 6 almost 7) At present he collects minutes as a result of bad behaviour. For refusing to work or go to assembly for example, they give him warning then start counting and for an act of aggression it will automatically be 5 minutes. This is then taken of his golden time or he often will have to have it as a detention during his lunchtime play.If theres still minutes left they are carried on to the next day. If anyone can give me some advice here i'd really appreciate it!!!

this sounds so soft but i've just started blubbing just to know i'm not the only one going through this is such a comfort , it feels so isolating at times being different. thanks for your replies

hi ,i totally relate to this !!! this summer we went away for five weeks in our caravan and my son had a whole campsite full of kids to play with. Wonderful for him terrifying for me ! During the first week i was pretty much sure it wasn't going to work out ,he was so often over excited and the inevitable was then happening the kids thinking he was "too much " .He so wants to be accepted he's like an excited puppy. He would also only want to lead the games they played and of course other kids get bored of this particularly as the games are so complicated!!! I stuck it out though because it was such great learning experience for him plus it's imposssible to keep them away from other children when they want so much to join in. How do the other kidsin the street get on with your son?

hi everyone, i found this forum the other night and found it such a comfort -so here i am posting my first message. My son is six almost seven and he's been recently diagnosed with aspergers and adhd. He goes to a mainstream school and the main problems we face at school are his refusal to do anything that he thinks has no interest to him, and also have constant problems with him hurting other kids. i wanted to know whether anyone else experiences this. So much of what i read about aspergers says the children are nervous of other kids but my son constantly seeks friendships , he just can't maintain them. Please help