madme

Hi. I would also recommend the Baron Cohen Dvds - they are expensive but worthwhile

I'm sorry but I think that it really isn't too much to expect teachers to be interested in difficulties like ASd Adhd Dyspraxia and dyslexia. These are difficulties that are common and in my experience not at all understood by most of the mainstream teachers who I have come across. A friend who did her teacher training only a few years ago felt that the training was woefully inadequate but more worringly was the attitude of those on the course towards sen. I think that I may have been very unlucky. I too hate this trend of "over concerned" parent. My son's former Head Teacher suggested this when we were taking our son to weekly OT sessions for a year- implying that we had nothing better to do! I'm sure any good teacher will be interested but my own experience has been denial in the face of obvious other evidence from other professionals in both my children's cases. I will now run for fear of being shot!

Hi. I think that my starting post was misleading given the contents of the piece- I had received an email from someone and just repeated what was said. Sorry to have frightened some. However it will certainly raise issues for those seeking a 52 week placement. It is a shame that the piece didnt explain more. It also highlights how much parents are spending going to Tribunal

Apparently there will be a piece about a child with SEN who was taken into care just after the parents won their sendist case- it seems that LEAs may consider this where a child is in a boarding school and the overall costs will be cheaper.

Just a thought- our group approached a local cinema to run autism friendly screenings of films- It has been a great success and I understand that its been copied by other groups elsewhere- we also approached a children's theatre for the same and they have been great. Good luck

My son attends an independent school and is funded by the LEA. It was a struggle and involved us applying to SENDIST. I would recommend that you seek help from IPSEA asap. Ace do a very good book about the law regarding SEN provision. Gabbitas has an excellent book about SEN schools. Have you considered boarding? Would you do the transport- if you can then that will cut down the cost- also boarding if weekly can reduce the daily transport costs. Do try and see if there are other schools out there that may be appropriate- look at schools that specialise in SPLD as they often also take Aspergers children. You need to try and get the HT of the other school to say that he couldnt take your child and why- we did that with a few schools that the LEA approached that we didn't think were suitable. They eventually ran out of options. Its a battle but worth it. Good luck

This did make me feel sad. My Dd 7 (AS) is not quite there yet but I can see this sort of thing happening. I have that book Aspergers and Girls which doesnt cover this in detail but there is a useful chapter on relationships. Youve had some great advice. Good luck

Wonderful news> :thumbs:

Lots of hugs!

Congratulations. Its a nice change isn't it when we can report the good things! Well done to you all.

Well it is now end of term. I'm relieved that Ds has managed to get through this last bit of school without any serious difficulties. He will now move to a different boarding house and away from the "witch" who he has had for the last two years. Its not right that she has been allowed to get away with all that she has done but that is life. The other teachers described it as a personality clash- hey shes the adult! I sat in the end of term prize giving and was so proud that not only was he mentioned by the Head Teacher in his speech but also he got two year prizes. He has worked hard and that's all that we can ask. In a few weeks he's 13 and now a teenager. He admitted to me that he got a bit drunk at the BBQs on the night before the end of term. It worried me but at least he was sensible enough to go and see the nurse who sent him to bed before a teacher saw him. I'm also pleased in a way that he told me. He will test the boundaries thats normal.

Well we got her after school club's questionnaire tonight. They paint a very different picture. There are clear sensory issues. What was interesting is that I saw the school senco who had apparently been at the after school club since school end not sure why but it seemed strange after only days ago senco said that no diffs and therefore no help. I think she was spying for evidence. To respond "never" to any question is bizarre and seems to be aimed at denying a need. Whereas school say never to fidgeting sfter school say always etc.

I've been reading this and thinking how would my two who are both aspergers react. My son would react concerned if he cared about the person ie he already had a relationship of sorts and so I think could on some level if he liked them "play the game" If he didn't I'm pretty sure that it would be no empathy at all. My daughter who is 7 would take mumble's approach.

Our son was 8 before he could ride a bike properly. We had tried. His aunt had tried. He had a bike from very early on. We tried with and without stabilsers. He had a trike. He had a dx of Aspergers and dyspraxia. We eventually paid for specialist lessons with a company locally who dealt with Severe SEN. He learmed how to ride within a few lessons. I sat and watched him and cried. They started with a scooter and got his balance right. Then a bike without pedals. Then a bike with pedals. It worked. Now we are still working on road sense!! I now feel that when the time is right it will happen if it can. Had we tried at 6 with my son it would not have worked.

Thanks Warrenpenalver- it doesnt look good. I'm quite shocked that this is written in that way- where exactly can this be found if I were to google it? Do they seriously think that people outgrow Aspergers? As for suggesting that parents go looking for an ADHD dx!

Just to say my son boards. I miss him so much when he is away. The only thing that keeps me going is that in some ways it is doing him good. I know in my heart that he couldn't cope at the local schools and so it must be the best decision for him, however hard it is for me. And you do have those holidays! I pick mine up this week for 9 weeks. Sad as I am I'm looking forward to cookng him his favourite meal and doing his washing! It doesnt get easier - you just find ways to deal with it! Avoid his bedroom for the first few weeks- I found myself unable to stop the tears at those moments. We have to let go to let them grow.

My son is nearly 13. He is very obsessed about flying He has had a few flying lessons and is hoping to join the air cadets this year. He has a dx of Aspergers, Dyspraxia and Adhd. He does take meds at present but this may change. If he wanted to join the airforce in some capacity( not necessarily as a pilot) would the asd dx stop him? He has loads of flight simulations on his laptop. When he had a few lessons he was fine and the pilot found him great to deal with as he was so interested. I have my own views but he is so obsessed that I feel that I can't put barriers in his way. Do all the forces say no to autism? I would't want him to join up. I feel that he should keep this as a hobby and when he can afford it do his private pilots licence.

Thanks all. I know in my heart that I understand DD. But I am so fed up of these games that schools and LEAs play.We are about to go to tribunal for the fourth time for her brother. I just get so fed up of the battle, after battle. When does it end- when I'm four feet under? I just checked on DD- she has her duvet wrapped around her like a mummy- tell me this child doesnt have sensory problems! Perhaps her teacher should see her now. On other occasions DD lines her bed with books as she loves the "cold sensation" This is also the child who will put on her swim suit to get in the bath and then try when I'm not looking to wear wet clothes or the costume still wet under her clothes! She hates shoes that fit. I have to buy thousands of pairs of tights! We have a bathroom full of different toothbrushes! She will scream when clothes hurt. She wears her lycra shorts under her uniform when she can as it makes her feel better. Mpst towels are too hard and she has to wipe her eyes every two seconds when I wash her hair- ! She would spend her life on a round about or in a funfair riding the most exilerating rides. She runs and runs when given the opportunity. Perhaps I'm mad.

Feeling very fed up. DD who is 7 is dxd as Aspergers. She has always had sensory issues- shoes, clothes, teeth, hair, touch, noise. She has seen an OT as the paediatrician saw the sensory side and felt she needed to see a specialist OT who deals with SID. The Ot saw her and said that she felt she probably does have SID. We have been asked to fill in the questionnaire. I got the school copy back- they have said "never" to all the questions- all 9 pages. Even the paed had commented previously on the fact that my DD always fidgets- but the school wrote reams to say there were no problems at all! They have already said that they don't see how she has Aspergers. We have just moved her to this school as its nearer and certainly better for her academically. She now has some playfriends who are also a bit quirky and so she doesnt stand out. I feel that we are being made out to be liars! I've been here before with my son's first school and we were subsequently proved right- they denied his problems and inferred that we were just neurotic despite the dx. Can't seee the point in pursuing the SID as we understand our DD and it was the school who we felt needed some guidance. To add to the misery the OT is our localone and as she goes to a school out of borough the school have said that they don't see that she has any needs that need addressing and the Local OT says they can't go to her school as its in another borough. She was on school action plus at her previous school. Her new IEP is hopeless. I know that they are entitled to their views but a child that never fidgets? If anyone has experience of SID and its dx can they tell me of their experiences. One of our problems is that when she comes home she is so hyper. She has taken to wearing her lycra shorts under her school dress as she says it makes her feel better.

I think there ought to be some sort of protest by parents about this. I agree CAt we need to raise our voices now before the changes are made. We are awaiting our proposed amended statement so we will be off to Tribunal for the fourth time! CaT I have only just seen yor post and will Pm my details. Anyone up for a rally in London?

Cat I had no idea that they were proposing such radical changes. Could you PM me details of the "campaign team"? I had a look on Ipsea 's website and couldn't find anuything which is strange as they usually take up such issues.

I hope that things were resolved appropriately. Unfortunately this is exactly why asd and ebd should not IMO be mixed together. It sounds like the HT hasnt taken it at all seriously. The child should have been removed immediately. Why should your son be missing school because of this child ? I think that with such threats in todays climate perhaps the police should be involved. The child clearly needs help and this HT doesnt sound as though he can deal with it. He needs a school where there are consequences for his actions. It also sounds like no proper risk assessment was undertaken by the school or the LEA when placing him in a taxi with another child. While you may have a potential claim in negligence against the school, I'm sure that is the last thing from your mind. I do think that there should be enquiry into what steps the HT took to ensure that children were safe before admitting him for a trial. Hope this next week is better.

Hi, I hope that you get the provision that you are seeking. We were in a similar position that the school was trying to undermine what we were saying despite independent evidence and we did win at tribunal. So good luck. I have to say that I don't think that the school should be talking about "failing" the sats. Its not about a pass or fail just trying to establish the level that the child is at. A child should not be made to feel a "failure" because of the sats results. Good luck

I remember being in a shop where a young child was having a melt down. It was very obvious to me that he was autistic. His mum was very upset by other shoppers response. I just went up to her and said that she should ignore them. Helped her with her shopping and I didn't say the "a " word - she told me and we then had a nice chat. I can recall so many times leaving a shop red faced and embarassed. Once in France I gave a french woman a mouthful on the beach as she stood there muttering about my son's behaviour- she had no idea that I could understand her. - Have to say though my son used to be able to clear a beach in minutes- which can be useful!

Hi Have you looked at the Gabbitas book of SEN schools? Also depending on your child many schools for Specific learning difficulties also cater for Aspergers, particularly where there are dyspraxic or dyslexic issues. Good luck