its gone so wrong

[hev]

its just gone terrible here,n and s went to museum,s came back full of attitude,i ignored the swearing so he started throwing big things about and k got frightened,n told him to stop and they had a row,nothing physical,anyway i got stressed told n to go up his mums,with that s has gone out as well,god knows where,n tried to get back in,i bolted door.he tried to get in 3 times,wouldnt let him,god knows where he has gone now,so i dont think n will come back,as for s,his behaviour is disgusting,i really cannot take it any more and i dont know what to do,he was looking for trouble all day,well he got his wish

[kellyanne]

oh hev i don't know what to say just giving you HUGE <'> >< <'> ><

[Flora]

hev <'> What a shame it went sour after they'd been having a trip out together. I'm puzzled as to why you wouldn't let Nick back in though??? I'm not going to lecture you at all, but if Nick is willing to give up his time to spend with steve, and then steve kicks off and frightens K, I can understand why Nick would be angry... and while Nick may have handled it badly, Steve needs to understand that when he kicks off it has an effect on everyone with the repercussions of that for the adults and other children at home.

 

I so hope it all settles down hun <'>

 

Flora XXXXX

[Kathryn]

Hev,

 

<'>

 

I hope things calm down soon.

 

K x

[Clare63]

Hev,

 

Sorry to hear things have ended up badly today ~ <'> <'> <'>

 

Clare x x x

[harmony]

Hev,

 

Sorry to hear things have ended up badly today ~ <'> <'> <'>

 

Clare x x x

 

Take a deep breath, try to get some sleep and hopefully you will feel better able to cope in the morning. My AS daughter tells me in her more rational moments, that families who yell at each other care about each other, if there was no yelling, no meltdowns etc then all the care and all the feelings would be gone. Yes it is really hard today, but tomorow could be different, better? who knows, but at least you should all get another chance.

 

slep well

Harmony

[Guest Lya of the Nox]

oh hunny <'> ><

x

[BusyLizzie100]

How are things now? Hope things calm down soon.

 

Have some of these <'> <'> <'> <'>

 

Lizzie x

[hev]

well i havent heard anything from nick,steve is at my sisters,yeah i shouldnt have made nick leave but i honestly cannot handle him and steven arguing any more,it makes me nervous and i dont like it,steven was terrible but hes my son so what else can i doim tired of it all,i just want peace

[Flora]

well i havent heard anything from nick,steve is at my sisters,yeah i shouldnt have made nick leave but i honestly cannot handle him and steven arguing any more,it makes me nervous and i dont like it,steven was terrible but hes my son so what else can i doim tired of it all,i just want peace

 

 

hev, I feel terrible, I'm so sorry if I sounded like I was lecturing you in my earlier post. It's bloomin' hard I know, I have experienced similar and know from first hand experience that it's almost impossible not to react to your protective instinct for your own child. There are so many emotions flying around, but the strongest one is that of a parent so I do appreciate how hard it is. Wish I could be more helpful. You must be living on your nerves <'>

 

Flo' XXX

[elun1]

<'> <'> Sorry Hev, I dont have any advice but wanted to send you some hugs.

I hope you're all ok

Elun xxx

[hev]

hev, I feel terrible, I'm so sorry if I sounded like I was lecturing you in my earlier post. It's bloomin' hard I know, I have experienced similar and know from first hand experience that it's almost impossible not to react to your protective instinct for your own child. There are so many emotions flying around, but the strongest one is that of a parent so I do appreciate how hard it is. Wish I could be more helpful. You must be living on your nerves <'>

 

Flo' XXX

it didnt come across like you was lecturing me flo ><well steve is at my sisters tonight and nick is at his mums,nick is going to get a flat as i cnnot stand any of this any moreits very sad but i cant see any alternative

[bid]

Hev, don't make any big decisions right now when everything is so upset <'>

 

I don't want to sound as though I'm lecturing you either, but Katie is your child too and she deserved the protection of her dad if Steve was scaring her

 

Nick was just protecting Katie as you try to protect Steve.

 

Take care, hun <'>

 

Bid

[Guest Lya of the Nox]

oh no

 

<'>

[Clare63]

Hev ~ <'> <'> <'>

 

Thinking of you.

 

Clare x x x

[bikergal]

So sorry you're having a rough time. <'> <'> <'>

[Bagpuss]

Hev, I've PM'd you hun <'>

[soraya]

Oh Hev, just when things were going so well, you must feel terrible, is Steve not at school or are there hols early? My Nick is the same with his Dad even when they are having a nice time Nick will go out of his way to kick off, its as if he cant stand the fact that things have gone well and he ends up spoiling a nice day, he is really really horrible to his Dad and they argue all the time so l know exactly how you feel. sending lots of <'> <'> <'>

[Enid]

Hev. just to say I know how you feel, my ds aged 12 has been so awful lately that the other 2 little ones are scared of him and it really is affectin them. He challanges me in front of them all the time, torments them, and his language is disgusting! and they hear it. He has started throwing things at me and also putting himself in front of me when I try to leave a room, very threatening, some days I think I cant take it another minute, don`t know where its all going to end. Enid

[stressedmumto2]

We have a similar problem with my son. My boyfreind and I have been together nearly 3 years and he wont move in with me I don't think he ever will as he needs his space and sometimes I need him to have his own space when it is all kicking off.

 

I think N is doing well with S and he probably hates it when S talks disrespectfully to you and scares your daughter as does my boyfreind when I get abuse form my son. I don't know what the answer is but I know sometimes having the space between me and my partner does work well, other times I want us to be togther but I know it just wont work, sometimes I wonder what our relationship is all about because it is weird, I am overly protective of my son and I find the best I can do is try and educate my boyfriend as to his behvaiours and why he reacts violently (more so now I can usually identify a trigger because they are immediate). Would N feel comfortable coming on here and writing what he feels? I know my boyfreind wont but I so wish he would somedays just so he too can vent like we are able to.

 

Just wanted to let you know I am thinking of you and hope things are calmer for the rest of the holidays, take care <'>

[hev]

thanks everyone <'> <'>

well n came back the next day and we had a good talk,he cant stand it when k is frightened and im upset,he said that he is not going to try so hard for steven to like him and i must say he does try really hard with steven but it gets him nowhere so at the mo they havent said a word to each other which in a way meant i had a peaceful night and i feel a lot better today,taking each day at a time

when you reply to my posts it never comes across as lecturing,i think of you as friends and i really do value your opinions,thanks <'>

[Bagpuss]

Glad to hear Nick has come back Hev, and you've had a talk.

 

It must so hard for the pair of you to get the balance right. He sounds like a wonderful man <'>

[pearl]

<'> Hev <'> you have all come so far together. I'm sure it will work out.

[oxgirl]

Hev, I'm so glad you and Nick have had a talk and are working things out, sounds like you need each other a lot. <'> <'>

 

~ Mel ~

[Karen A]

<'> <'> <'> Karen.

[Clare63]

Hev take care hunny, make sure you and Nick KEEP talking.

 

<'> <'> <'>

 

Clare x x x