bjkmummy Report post Posted June 7, 2008 joe literally runs to school in the morning. im getting so worried about him as nearly every morning it feels like a near miss with him running into the orad. we live on an raf base so the walk to school is close and the roads are quiet but thats no excuse. i feel that the time has come and im going to basically going to have to 'train' him to walk with me - a bit like you would train a dog - god that sounds so horrible doesnt it! i really odnt mean it to but i really need to get this sorted. put my head in the sand for too long as worried about the enormous melt downs that are about to come my way Im just interested in how everyone else has got a child that just likes to run to actually change and walk nicely with them or am i asking for the impossible??? i was thinking about getting a wrist strap but hes nearly 5 now and feel like im treating him like a baby but he runs like so fast that when he goes ive got no chance of catching him - im fed up at shouting at him to stop - its 50/50 whether he will stop and im fed up at all the other parents looking at me in that certain way that says that i am a parent who cant control my child - im really concerned that my luck is about to run out and it really is only a matter of time before he doesnt stop and runs straight into the path of a car Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Enid Report post Posted June 7, 2008 not easy! I have seen this on super nanny with nt? children as its a big problem with many children and she used to have the old star chart/marble jar sounds naff but kids do love it! very visual, worth a try. Enid Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bard Report post Posted June 7, 2008 i feel that the time has come and im going to basically going to have to 'train' him to walk with me - a bit like you would train a dog - god that sounds so horrible doesnt it! i really odnt mean it to but i really need to get this sorted. That's what mum and I did with B from him being around 4, because he loved to run. We gave him markers, made it into a game, " You can run to the next lamp post" "You can run to the oak tree" " Go to the next kerb" If he was clever enough to do it and wait, he got praised and allowed to continue. If he didn't keep the rules, then he had to hold hands or have a wrist strap. It worked very well, a step at a time, consistency about the language used, pointing out kerbs, crossing places, driveways. Around 8, he was allowed to go on ahead to a visible point and wait, sometimes 100 yards or so, now he's 13 he walks to and from school, goes up to town with me and I'll say 'I've got to go to X, do you want to come or wait?' and he'll wait in the same place and not wander off. Or he'll say ' I want to go to X ' and I'll arrange a meeting place 30 minutes later and he'll be there. Far in the distant future for you, but the training and expectations we built into him from being 3 or 4 have built up into a trustworthy relationship and a boy that can cope with Brighton and London traffic without getting squashed. My mum reckons that boys and spaniels are very similar when needing training! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shnoing Report post Posted June 7, 2008 Where we live, that kind of behaviour from your child (being uncontrollable in traffic situations) entitles you to get the blue badge for your car and a wheelchair from the health service. Don't know how this is being handled in the UK, though. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jo jones Report post Posted June 7, 2008 we had this with blaine and up till last year was using a wrist strap,,he is now 6 and i have to hold his hand very tight as he sees the other kids running off on way to school and does try to wriggle from me,,he has no sense of danger at all,,,he knows that if he does not hold my hand then the strap goes back on!!!he has run onto the road on numerous times as he is so fast if he can slip me,, i try everyday to show him what we must do to cross the road,,this has taken a long time to sink in,! but now he will at least look both ways and say to me if there are cars coming,,, because this is a strict routine i think this is why it is working,but he cannot play in our street because he thinks it does not apply here,,he says its only for school walk,,, this is why he does not go out to play without one of us with him,, constantly on guard looking and warning him of dangers but if we ask him what will happen if you get hit by a car? he says i will be flat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! then you go to hospital and you get some new bones!!!!! dunno where he gets these ideas from,,,he is a very literal thinker, very tom and jerry i say, Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kazzen161 Report post Posted June 7, 2008 Same as Bard, I trained them to go to the next lampost or whatever, and then wait for me to catch up. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JsMum Report post Posted June 7, 2008 We have similair issues, I think its kind of common with children with ADHD its been let loose, outside in the freshair, the unconsous worries of the day head, that burst of energy we all envy, for us we needed to urgently look at road safety because J simply thought he would actually dint the car and he would get back up again, not soo I know, also J doesnt understand the actual speed the cars are coming, he doesnt think before he does actions and just goes for it, thats the main reason he has had some very close misses, what we did was go throw some booklets that discuss road safety that was luckly in a library, then we did some interactive activities on this website, http://www.hedgehogs.gov.uk/main/main.html The strap thing didnt work for J, as he is sensory to clothing,belts,straps, and he just hooked it off, since the website he is starting to look, but he is still a wirlwind and off he goes, this was one of the main reasons I agreed he needed concerta xl. but as he refuses to take it Im just on borrowed time since he has had his arm in pot that has slowed down the running, but in Js style he still trys. I have no sugestions as such, just the website and keep helping them understand the consequences of running into the road. Its a hard task to get them to understand. Good luck, hope you like the hedgehogs. JsMum Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
justamum Report post Posted June 8, 2008 My son is 11, nearly 12, and he up until recently always held my hand as it made him feel safe. However my arm and hand were beginning to get very sore at trying to hold him back from running. I recently had a chat with him and he has progressed to a wrist strap, very unsure of it at first as he no longer felt safe. We are now working on an alarm Alarm However this has resulted in him standing almost touching me as he doesn't like the alarm going off. Still better than having to grab him all the time! At his age he, and I, get stares for wearing a wrist strap...but I give stares back and if they continue I ask if they have problem...usually does the trick I just wish folk would engage brain and think...oh that's not usual, probably the boy has a problem Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kathrynh Report post Posted June 8, 2008 I still use reins with my six year old. Due to breaking my wrist badly a few years ago I dont think I could manage with a wrist strap. He is nowhere near being reliable at stopping when I say so. I couldn't care less what other people who see him think - his safety comes first. He has severe learning difficulties and is completely unaware of other people's reactions so I do not have to worry about him being embarrased by it. Without the reins we would not be able to go on the nice walks that we both enjoy. WE were out for nearly two hours this morning exploring an area we hadn't walked before. If I need both my hands free I can hook my arm through the riens. Most of the time B holds my hand and the strap is just looped over my arm to stop him running if neccessary. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
morgan and alexandra Report post Posted June 9, 2008 It took me a long time to TRAIN my daughter to walk, we would have daily meltdowns on the way to school because she couldn't walk and had to run. It was a nightmare but i persevered and she is much better now. She had no road sense either and would also stick her arms out infront of cars when they were driving near us. Very scary. I started slowly and built it up. She learnt that what ever she did, that i was one step ahead of her and i think it just wore here down in the end. I gave her lots of praise and now i dont need to hold her hand. However, when we go shopping, well that's a whole different set up and still a total nightmare...lol. I ignore all the filthy looks and comments and just focus on helping my daughter. Good luck Helen Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dooday24 Report post Posted June 9, 2008 reece runs or wanders off so we got him a major buggy from the nhs hes 8 in sept and it has been a god send wouldnt know wat to do without it now as i dont drive and have to walk everywhere love donnaxxx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
