dooday24 Report post Posted December 4, 2008 we put the decs and tree up 2day.. which was really lovely but reece now thinks he shud open a xmas present...... i have told him he has to wait till father xmas has been but hes getting really stressed about it all..... boohoooo gonna hav a long few weeks, do any of u have the same problems on the run up to xmas???? love donnaxxxxx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BusyLizzie100 Report post Posted December 4, 2008 Well, we have just had a birthday today which was bad enough! DS1 is 11 today and was up all night from excitement and anxiety, was even sick. Kept him off school today because he is exhausted (me too!). And we had another birthday a week ago, when DS2 was 9, so we are pretty worn out with it all. Christmas will have to wait. Am already thinking of handing all the presents out the night before so we aren't up all night again... Still, it'll be just me and the boys at home on Christmas Day - DH has to work. Lizzie x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dooday24 Report post Posted December 4, 2008 reece was the same he ended up over excited and was off scool on his birthday.. sorry u are so worn out and hopefully xmas goes more smoothly.. wat hrs is yr dh working on xmas day??? love donnaxxxxxxx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheNeil Report post Posted December 4, 2008 I do...and I live on my own Bought myself some nice presents this year and I just want to open them now...but not allowed Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oxgirl Report post Posted December 4, 2008 Does he know what presents he's getting, Donna, and would it help if he did? This is the first year that Jay has been able to cope with not knowing exactly what he has got for Xmas and he's 15. On previous years he just couldn't cope with the not knowing of it all and he hated surprises so much that we would always tell him exactly what he had so that he could relax. That way, the suspense didn't get too much for him, it was just a matter of looking forward to opening what he knew he would be happy with. Relatives didn't understand and thought we were spoiling the surprise for him, but it was the only way he could cope with all the uncertainties and he was much happier and more settled for it. ~ Mel ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dooday24 Report post Posted December 4, 2008 hi oxgirl that is really weired u say that as he keeps asking to have a look at a few of his presents which i have done and he had a bit of a look and said now u can put them back and was a lot more settled but i felt the same i feel as if im spoiling the suprise, but wat u have said is very helpful thanku.. he does hate surprises and usually just throws his presents aside that people buy him which can b abit embarressing but we av got used to it...lol thanx again mel for the advice is very much apreciated love donna xxxxxxx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oxgirl Report post Posted December 4, 2008 No probs, Donna. Surprises can be lovely and exciting to some but to others can be a torture and a source of great stress, certainly were for my lad anyway. ~ Mel ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Enid Report post Posted December 4, 2008 I do...and I live on my own Bought myself some nice presents this year and I just want to open them now...but not allowed ok maybe just a small one then Enid Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Enid Report post Posted December 4, 2008 I dont put my tree and decorations up untill the kids break up from school, less stress all round, dreading this year as last year was SOOOOOOO terrible, 3 incidents involving the police and extreme and prolonged violence between xmas eve and new year, god what a nightmare, all has been calm now for weeks, so fingers crossed. Enid. PS I always keep him off school on his birthday!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bikemad Report post Posted December 4, 2008 Yup my ds is the same..as soon as the tree is up he wants the presents under it n then wants to open them all the time. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dooday24 Report post Posted December 4, 2008 its deffinetly a hard situation isnt it and hard to know wat to do for the best... but we will get there (where ever there maybe lol) reece has just helped me wrap nannys and daddys presents up bless him and put them under the tree.... love donna xxxxx goodluck for the xmas cheer everyone ...... (i will b buying a large bottle of vodka ) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
julie1 Report post Posted December 4, 2008 our son struggled every year with christmas. we all thought it was because he couldnt cope with all the change, that was only the start of the problem. he would be sick up all night, excluded from school, he was out of control. that was until he was old enough to talk to us and tell us how he was feeling. he was 11 years old then. He explained the problem; he was very happy to get presents but could not cope not knowing what they were, he said its very hard to look happy when you never asked for the gift you have been given. he liked to be prepared to smile and say thank you, in advance that way people would not get cross with him. now we tell him as much as possible what is inside the presents we have got for him and so do our friends, this makes life eaiser for him. he is so much calmer now so that if he does get a gift and we dont know what it is he does not over react to much and is no longer sick each christmas. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
warrenpenalver Report post Posted December 4, 2008 (i will b buying a large bottle of vodka ) I have 2 :ph34r: Odd when i dont drink any more Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dooday24 Report post Posted December 4, 2008 nice i will b coming round to yrs then warren hehe love donnaxxxxx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
peaches Report post Posted December 4, 2008 My daughter, who is now 22, had sleepless nights for about 6 weeks prior to Christmas. One year she was so tired on Christmas day she was physically sick. Our 3 are sleeping badly at the moment so it looks like they are taking after her. We dont put our tree up until the weekend before Christmas usually. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dooday24 Report post Posted December 5, 2008 think i will put my tree up on xmas eve next yr........ and will take all presents to mums to wrap causes far too much stress here .... peaches i hope they settle soon reece is still high one minute way over the top then crying the next boohoo love donnaxxxxxx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Canopus Report post Posted December 6, 2008 I have 2 :ph34r: Odd when i dont drink any more I was expecting you missed your daily tot of rum. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jericho Report post Posted December 6, 2008 My two hate surprises too. They choose their own birthday presents the weekend before. At Christmas we do the choosing but they are allowed to know in advance what they will be getting. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Clare63 Report post Posted December 6, 2008 Don't even know why I bother wrapping Connor's presents, he hates the feel of the paper (took us years to realise why he never rushed to open all his presents like most kids do).......he now lets the dog unwrap then for him As for Christmas stressing........that me all over, once December begins I am in a blind panic until New Year........roll on the 1st of Janaury Clare x x x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dooday24 Report post Posted December 6, 2008 me too clare wish it was 1st jan lol hes driving me batty bless him xxxxxxxxx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
something_different Report post Posted December 6, 2008 1: leave the tree and decs untill as late as possible 2: avoid shopping and festivities 3: have a list of xmas presents made up by the child 4: on xmas eve don't wrap all the prezzies (from the list), have them all set up and ready to be used! LOL thats wot i wld do anyways! Happy Christmas! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pookie170 Report post Posted December 6, 2008 Heh, we don't put our deco's up until a 8 or 9 days before Christmas, and NEVER do we commit the folly of putting gifts under the tree. Oboyno!!!! Y'know that ad on telly at the mo, featuring a bevy of skinny clothes-horses and a quartet of mellifluous man-band? One of the squeaky clean serenaders (who does torture my earholes when he begins balladcrooning!) decides to swop the name tags on the gifts under the tree. (Such mischevious monkeyshine does he commit!) Well, such wide-eyed hilarity is caused by this the next day, they all fall over laughing!!! (I am not a fan of this aging boy-band- I apologise to those who swoon and lust after 'em, but they just ain't my cup of tea!) However, the ad makes me chuckle, in actuality, as it reminds me of a christmas a few years back when Cal got into the stash of gifts sitting waiting to be delivered around family and friends. He was sure something in there HAD to be for him, but was sadly disappointed. Mind you, he committed his sneaky act very adroitly, and didnt tear any paper, managing to re-wrap so passing well that I did not notice. (I was preoccupied, right enough, it seems to be my vocation!) Anyway, Christmas morning dawned, presents were denuded of wrapping and I was busy stuffing the discarded paper into binbags when the phone began to ring.... and it did not stop for hours! All the present recipients were calling in bemused confuzzlement as they opened gifts clearly not meant for them- oh, I was soooo embarrassed! And Cal was sooooo found out!! We did laugh though, later....... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
baileyj Report post Posted December 8, 2008 Weve learnt over the years that you don't need to conform. As someone said, traditions are important to us, but that doesn't mean they are right for our little ones. Max now 8, now enjoys Christmas, but that only started last year. Now, from about October I start writing a list of what he wants, with Max's help, and he sees the list. I have become an expert on Adverts and honeing in to what Max wants. Then I give everyone in the family an item to buy, so that Max knows what he's getting. Now we can wrap pressies, but when he was younger he hated surprises. It took me a few years to get over that and learn that it didn't matter if we were abit different. Result, no shocks or suprises, happy Max, so happy family. And, on Christmas Day when were all sitting down eating the Turkey at the table, Max will be in the playroom (his choice) with his nuggets and chips and a happy boy because he's not stressed. Hope everyone has a good one, or at the very least survives it. Jo x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oxgirl Report post Posted December 8, 2008 The thing about them knowing what they're getting from other family members too is that it eliminates any disappointment. It's awful when someone gives your child something and they open it in a frenzy of excitement only to fling it across the room in disgust because it wasn't what they wanted or expected. If they're prepared for what they're going to get it's just a matter of looking forward to having it and enjoying it and they are then freed up to be appropriatey grateful and gracious to the giver because they have something that they wanted in the first place. All that awkward trying to pretend to be pleased and thanking someone for something that they're disappointed with is just embarrassing. I remember G&G giving Jay presents and he'd turn to me and ask me 'what is it'. They used to look so horrified when I'd tell him straight away what it was, they wanted to go through the chirade of 'oh well, that would be telling', 'let's just wait and see', etc. and it was just unbearable for my lad. It's just not worth it imo. ~ Mel ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sesley Report post Posted December 8, 2008 you could say there is nothing in the boxes until Santa comes on Christmas eve,and with magic fill them,at the moment if you open them now and break the seals they would just be empty . do you have a advent calender ,or you could get those little chocolate santas and give him one each day as he ticks off the number of sleeps he needs .i still have the magic of santa at home don't know how long for,but if you all still have a magic santa its great to exploit it a little Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dooday24 Report post Posted December 12, 2008 ive been to camhs today and we spoke about social stories............ we came up with some ideas on one to try and help in the run up to xmas and xmas day...... so have sat 2nite and printed off loads of pics and typed it all up and reece helped and did some cutting drew some pics and then got bored lol well i will see if it helps will try anything once hehe wish me luck love donnaxxxxxx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cathyz Report post Posted December 12, 2008 Hi We've had the same routine for years now, and for the first time it's just abit different, I'm sort of ok with it, kids sort of, but we always put the tree up on the last sunday before they break up from school, but this year I'll be at work so it goes up tommorrow, saturday, which was ok until the subject of making mince pies on the saturday which we always do wouldn't work if we're putting up the tree on saturday. So in between me working, hubby going on nights and not planning this we've had to make mince pies for tommorrow, tonight, with the tree, even though some had to be apple for the 2 who don't do mince meat because it isn't because that is in chilli and its not the same stuff Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
