MrsR Report post Posted November 10, 2005 Hello everyone. My son was just dx'd with Asperger's and as it's all new, I don't know how to help him and how to help myself cope with it. I'm not bothered about the dx as I know he's still my special little guy and I obviously still love him and I don't see him as having "something wrong" with him, but I need help in how to help him. The main thing I'm having a hard time with lately is the obssession with his movies and television. If he see's something more than twice, he memorises the script and acts it out and quotes the script, mixing it with other shows he's seen and actions. 9 times out of 10 he won't speak to me as himself, but only using a mish-mash of these programs he's seen. It's getting to where I just can't cope with it anymore. I've tried telling him that I want to talk to "HIM" and not Harry Potter, Kevin from Blue's Clues, etc and sometimes he complies, but usually even if he does, it's only for a few minutes then he goes right back to the scripts and actions. Should I just let him do this, or should I try to curb it? If I try to curb it, he seems to do it more and sometimes gets quite agitated. I need advice please and any will be greatly appreciated. I feel like I just can't cope with it. Anyway, that's me. Thank you for reading. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mandyque Report post Posted November 10, 2005 Hello and welcome Mrs R, hope you get some answers here. <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
smiley Report post Posted November 10, 2005 (edited) Hello Mrs R and Welcome - this place is a god-send! I have a son, 6, with Aspergers. He memorises TV (and every book he reads....etc ) as well and often talks as though he's a characature he's seen. I used to try to persuade him to stop - but it caused him so much distress, i tend to let him now. He does answer me revelantly so i'm not too worried about it now. If i do get a 'Michael' answer it's in a thick american accent The thing is, he doesn't watch that much TV!! My sons speech therapist has said that because he finds communication so difficult he uses this way of talking as a confidence booster. Can't remember (or spell!) the correct name for it.....Ecoll.....something or other. Have a good read through the threads on here, it really helped me when my son was first diagnosed. Hugs <'> Mary xx Edited November 10, 2005 by smileymab Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nellie Report post Posted November 10, 2005 A warm welcome to the forum Mrs. R., You have come to right place for information, advice and understanding. It's a tough time post diagnosis, it does get easier. Reading some of the many posts should help, it might help you feel less isolated. This should be a good starting point. Echolalia http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.ph...t=0entry37279 Take care Nellie <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DaisyProudfoot Report post Posted November 10, 2005 Welcome Mrs R - these folk are superb - they're there through good times and bad. Glad you could join us Daisy Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oracle Report post Posted November 10, 2005 The thing is, he doesn't watch that much TV!! My sons speech therapist has said that because he finds communication so difficult he uses this way of talking as a confidence booster. Can't remember (or spell!) the correct name for it.....Ecoll.....something or other. As Nellie has said this is called Echolalia. Smileymab I think that your speech therapist is correct in what she has told you. Although my David is now 18 I can always tell if he is stressed or uncomfortable because he talks to me either in an accent or someone elses voice. I have stopped trying to stop him from doing this as I was simply causing him so much more distress. I have to say that I find accents and scripted performances so much easier to live with than the repetition of a sentance of phrase that Matthew latches onto when he is distressed. He can repeat the same sentance over and over again for hours This really does my head in and makes me want to scream. Again I try not to bite but for me this really is an issue. Carole Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mel_jayne Report post Posted November 10, 2005 Welcome MRSR <'> .You are in the right place,they keep you going on the bad days.There always someone online to help you with anything Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bevalee Report post Posted November 10, 2005 Welcome MrsR You have come to the right place, the support here is amazing! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
annie Report post Posted November 10, 2005 Welcome MrsR This is a great forum with the nicest, friendliest, supportive people. Annie <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
phasmid Report post Posted November 10, 2005 Hi and welcome on board. You don't say how old your son is but, Phas Jr used to do this all the time when he was younger (he's 16 now). It began with adverts and went on to films (anything Disney was memorised - often on first viewing!) all of which seemed very cute at first. It soon wore thin, as you have found! Phas jr still does it but not with any great frequency. It does get better - hang on to that thought - it DOES get better. I haven't read the lnks posted but I would imagine they contain everything you need to know re echolalia. As for anything else you want or need to know just ask. Doesn't matter how daft it seems to be, if it's bothering you you need an answer. No one will think anything of it, at least one of us will have been through it at some time. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jayjay Report post Posted November 10, 2005 Welcome to the forum Mrs R, these folk are absolutely brilliant here and i dont know what i would have done if i hadnt found it myself not that long ago <'> <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Flora Report post Posted November 11, 2005 Hi MrsR. I too have a son with AS,he is 11 (nearly 12) and he had his dx aged 9. I also have a younger son with ASD and he often latches on to a sentence or a phrase and repeats it over and over and over.... Like Carole said, it does your head in. Sometimes I manage to just ignore it but I have found myself resorting to 'will you just stop' (and less polite variations on the same theme!) at times. You couldn't have found a better online forum than this one. I only stumbled across this in July this year, and I wonder how the heck I managed without it for so long Lauren Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MrsR Report post Posted November 11, 2005 Hi again! Thank you all for your replies and kind welcome! I feel a lot better just knowing this forum is here. I'm starting to consider now home-educating him because he doesn't seem to be getting on at school very well, even though his teachers are fab. I can see the look of relief when I come to pick him up, and the look of dread or wariness when I drop him off. There is a SENCO there that helps them out and another specialist teacher, but once he starts full-time (he's 4, btw), I don't know how they'll cope with him when they'll have so many other kids to deal with. I know in my heart anyway that he's not a mainstream school kid and I really think I'd feel better if I home-educated him. UGH! I don't know. The whole thing is very overwhelming at the moment. I'm sure the husband will go along with whatever I say (and the doctors) but...oh, I don't know. Anyway, thank you again for listening. I really appreciate it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
baddad Report post Posted November 11, 2005 Hi Mrs R - Welcome to the forum. As everyone else has said, we's a good lot around here, and if we can help we will! Now I'm going to trot out tha same old bit of advice I trot out to all recent DX 'newbies'... Slow down a bit, and give the dust time to settle... It's natural, and very tempting, to go rushing in head first and try to help your kid as much as you can (i.e. with home ed). Finally getting that dx helps you to feel more confident about what you are working with, after what may have been a very long and frustrating period where you felt totally in the dark and isolated. While the dx does do that, it's also the start of a very, very long journey and a huge learning curve, and for many the initial relief does turn around and bite you on the bum somewhat a bit further down the road. Take some time, take stock, and get your head round it all first... L&P BD <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Malika Report post Posted November 13, 2005 Hi MRS R WELCOME to the forum <'> <'> <'> My son always watch a video at least 10 times before he can be interested in another one and love to repeat expression he find in it, lately he watch something on the internet and keep repeating over and over again "damn you damn you " even in the street after agressive looks from 2 big blocks I thought I would be better explaining to him that it was not the best expression to say especially in the street . could lead to misinterpretation.... May be you could try to give him a timer and ask him to have some time off when you can communicate toghether I do that with mine if not he would be on computer or watch the same thing all day long. Take care. Malika. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Minxygal Report post Posted November 13, 2005 Hello As many of the others said this is something so many of our kids tend to do. As the years have gone on we have learned to be careful what we let ours watch as the role play and mimicing can become a problem if you're not careful We don't do things like Power Rangers and WWF....Too risky. That advice baddad gave you a few posts up is really good hun, it takes time and you shouldn't expect to know it all at once. We all make mistakes, what's important is that we learn from them <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
