Things you don't say to an AS kid

[DaisyProudfoot]

Just remembered this morning: things you don't say to an AS kid

 

"You'd forget your head if it wasn't screwed on!"

 

Created much hilarity in our house this morning

[phasmid]

Have you ever tried to explain what 'Toasting the bride' means, in between howls of tearful laughter, after being asked about the size of toasting fork they'd be using?!

[Viper]

 

Everytime Ben hurts himself and I ask where did you bang it, he always say's "on the door" etc. When what I want to know is what part of his body I need to rub.

 

Viper.

[littlenemo]

Com nearly got excluded for talking to his LSA in class. Every time the teacher told him to be quiet he just carried on talking... quieter

[mandyque]

I've heard of AS kids getting quite worried when someone has said they were laughing their head off, you just don't realise sometimes when we use some well known phrases how weird they must sound to them

[Flora]

Someone asked my son 'how do you feel compared to other people?'

 

He said 'I don't know because I don't know how other people feel'.

[oracle]

A couple of years ago when Matthew was running a really high Temperature I said to his dad that he felt as if he was on fire A rather hysterical Matthew pleaded with us NOT to call the Fire brigade to put him out

 

We really do say some stupid things when you really think about it

 

Carole

[littlenemo]

But it's very useful when you're doing silly animations as you can make them all really happen (laughing heads off, heads screwed on, etc).

[Suze]

Nemo ........................stand behind the tram- line really confused my son ...........he stood in a gymnasium full of people doing(trying) a tae kwon do class and laughing saying there,s no trams in here silly

[~Jonathan~]

Last night, Mum and I were watching The Eiger Sanction with Clint Eastwood and in one part of the film it called for him to shin up a drainpipe and Mum said to me "don't worry, he's not doing that, they just lay the building flat" and I roared with laughter. I knew what she was saying but it made me laugh all the same. When the time came where you could see Clint come in through the window and then walk towards the door (where the camera was positioned) Mum said (as if reading my thoughts) "that's a proper building otherwise he'd fly towards the camera!"

Edited December 15, 2005 by ~Jonathan~

[Suze]

Is your mum on the spectrum??

[jomica]

Might be a local phrase, I don't know, but "he killed himself laughing" caused a great deal of unease in my house. Took ages before my 8yr old (ASD HF) would smile, let alone laugh!

[woodri]

An AS student made a mistake in a maths test and muttered "######" under his breath. The teacher was passing at the time and admonished him kindly with "I didn't hear that". So he shouted "######"

[lindy-lou]

just in jest one day i joked to india that boys were smelly,but its backfired a bit as she now hates boys and men as there all smelly,even her poor dad wont get a cuddle cause hes a smelly boy,she takes everything as literally as its said.

[lisann]

Hummm

There are loads of these where I truley open my mouth without thinking.

 

Char bumped his head and mum said

 

" Where did you bang it"

 

Char replies

 

" on the door" !!

 

I ment where abouts on his head suppose it makes me ASD for assuming he knew what I mean!!! LOL

 

Lisa

[woodri]

The sign over the college bar says 'Over 18's only' and one of my AS students had just turned 18. He was convinced he was still not allowed to buy a drink because he was 18 but not over 18 because that would be 19.

[sue45]

Woodri, love your penguin friends!

 

When my daughter was seven, her hamster, Rosie died. She didn't seem to be that upset to tell the truth, but I set about having a little burial service for the hamster thinking she might be supressing her emotions or something like that. I found a shoe box and told H she could decorate it if she wanted to and put Rosie's name on it. I left her to it and returned a few minutes later to find she'd written on it in black marker pen: DEAD HAMSTER. I had to get out of that room quick as I was splitting my sides with the effort of not laughing out loud. Bless her!!

[loulou]

Hi,

 

I have a habit of saying "I'll be there in a minute", when Kai calls me. When i get to him, he is counting out loud and says, "Mummy that took you 85 seconds, that's not a minute!".

 

I don't say it anymore

 

There are so many more phrases and sayings that he gets confused over. You really do have to be careful what you say.

 

Loulou x

[Flora]

The penguins and funny AS stories has just reminded me of one my friend told me.

 

She works in the library of a primary school and is also a youth leader; as such she has got to know a few of the special needs kids and their parents. One of the parents has an older AS child who was obsessed with penguins. They took him to the zoo one day, and I'm not sure of all the details, but apparently when they got home they discovered that he'd some how (don't ask me how) put one of the penguins in to his back pack and smuggled it out. How he managed to get it in the bag, or how they didn't notice until they got home I really don't know; but thought the story was hillarious! Someone who works at the zoo had to come and collect the penguin (unharmed) to take back.

 

Lauren

[Pippin]

I was in the car last week discussing the characters in the Christmas story with my 4. After we'd talked through who everyone was it went quiet for a minute. Then Pete said...

"Muuuum".....

"Yes Peter".....

"so who's Gloria then?"

 

[DaisyProudfoot]

I was in the car last week discussing the characters in the Christmas story with my 4. After we'd talked through who everyone was it went quiet for a minute. Then Pete said...

"Muuuum".....

"Yes Peter".....

"so who's Gloria then?"

 

 

..... and where is Excelsis Deo I wonder?

 

Lauren....isn't that one of those urban myth stories?

 

Daisy

[Pippin]

No, honestly! it really happened!!! I nearly drove into the hedge. I suppose he could have heard it told somewhere and repeated it, but he really meant the question.....he doesn't "get" jokes anyway.

[DaisyProudfoot]

No Pippin, I meant wasn't Lauren's story about the penguins an urban myth!

 

The Gloria thing is so cute Hope the hedge is OK

 

Daisy

[Flora]

Daisy, it may well be. It's just something my friend told me about recently. I'll ask her!

 

Lauren

[littlenemo]

The sign over the college bar says 'Over 18's only' and one of my AS students had just turned 18. He was convinced he was still not allowed to buy a drink because he was 18 but not over 18 because that would be 19.

I had that problem till I decided that 18 and one three-hundred-and-sixty-fifth (sorry, can't do fractions on here) is over 18

Having said that, the only time I was asked for ID in the pub was on my eighteenth birthday (and I'd been drinking there every night for 2 years!)

 

nemo

 

p.s. love the avatar

[ray]

in my experience you avoid: 'depends', 'maybe', 'perhaps', 'we'll see', and 'dont know'

 

alex said to me last night that he 'didn't want to put somebody's foot out of joint' - i think he mean't nose

[fiorelli]

ray, add to that, 'I'll think about it', 'In a minute' (in fact anything which has a time in it e.g. we're going out in 10 miutes/half hour!), 'Go to your [bed]room' (for being naughy) (answers I have had are 'how long for?' 'What for?' 'It's boring, I'm not going')