Is what children write in school private

[Mother in Need]

Last Thursday (on one of the few-for-me-lucky-days in which I could get my son to school) he was asked to write about some of his achievements at school. Please note the instructions only said 'achievements', nothing about it needing to be positive ones. My son wrote things like 'I managed to dislike my form teacher' 'I managed to stay home on a lot of days' etc.

 

These remarks were as far as I am concerned, all very very true! Negative yes, but he was simply following the instructions as he understood them.

 

However, they really upset his form teacher and he received a good telling off, but not just her but by several others also (all to do with his SEN, they REALLY don't understand him!!! )

 

As you may imagine, there was no way I could get him to school the next day.

 

Desperately needing a break, I bribed him into attending school today, which only just worked. Anyway, while at school several other members of staff (incl administrative staff) remarked on his piece of writing and on how naughty he had been etc.

 

Guess what, there is no way I am going to get him back into school tomorrow.

 

Should his writings have been passed from person to person, or is there some rule or regulation that should have protected my son from that?

[adamsmum]

You'r poor boy. I think what happend was out of order ther must be rules about this. I would defanatly complain and tell them what you think. I dont see how this has heeped you'r boy infact i'd say it was a form of bullying. you would think thay would know better sorry i will shut up now

[phasmid]

My initial thought was I cannot think of a hard and fast rule that would cover this. Showed Mrs P your post (oops - for good reasons though). She said, and I agree, that this is bullying. They would not allow, at least I hope they would not allow, a child to do this to another child, that would be considered to be bullying. Staff should adhere to the bullying policy too. Yes we discuss things about the children but I would expect praise to be handed out this way not admonishments. They could have been pleased, as you were, that he had understood the instruction (in his own way admittedly) and done the work.

 

Perhaps they ought to re-think this approach.

[LKS]

MIN another classic example of a complete lack of understanding. They might as well have gone the whole hog and got him to stand up in assembly and read it out He wrote an honest piece of work and although it might have upset his form teacher she should by now have some understanding of how he works. There are probably no 'rules' governing this but I would be interested to know what their justification was in showing his work.

[annie]

I agree with everybody.........this is bullying.

 

Please keep a diary of any incidents like this including who said what, how your son reacted (by not wanting to go to school). We did it and it paid off big time. We were able to prove that the lack of support and understanding by school were having a really bad effect on Alex's health and well-being.

 

The last thing most schools expect are for parents to turn up at meetings with a neatly laid out diary of events.

[littlenemo]

in most schools kids work will be shown to others and discussed - as will the children - it is part of working together and supporting each other and is usually done in the spirit of either sharing successes or getting help with strategies for supporting kids.

 

What is wrong here is the general reponse to your boy's work and the effect it has on him - Com does this sort of writing when frustrated and last year we had problems with him getting detentions for 'inapporopriate remarks in his books'. I flipped the coin on them and went to the senco and head and told them how wonderful it was that he was beginning to express his frustration without confrontation and meltdown.

 

This year all staff had have training and now they look at his work and see the funny side most of the time - understanding makes such a big difference.

 

Zemanski

[Elanor]

MiN

 

This is a shocking way to treat a child - and especially when his work clearly showed the problems that he is having with school (and rather well- expressed I think).

 

They should have taken this as a sign that they need to radically step up their efforts to help your son, but instead they are treating him as a naughty child, and inappropriately punishing him with ridicule and group admonition.

 

I'd take this really seriously - their behaviour is inexcusable in the circumstances of your son's AS, and even worse, they have made your son's school attendance problems even worse.

 

In the first instance you could complain to the Head Teacher, copied to the Governor and LEA. Have you had an educational psychologist in yet - if not, what better excuse can you have for demanding one?

 

Elanor

[barefoot wend]

I agree that the school have behaved badly.

 

They asked your son to do a piece of work - they did not tell him that only 'nice' comments would be tolerated. Most kids would work this out for themeselves - a child with AS would not. Therefore, I strongly feel he is being chastised because of his disability.

 

Just as children with asd can be verbally impulsive, they are also impulsive when it comes to the written word - it is a part of their asd. They are also 100% honest. I would tell the school that they are punishing him NOT for being naughty but for his disability - which is WRONG!

 

Barefoot

[Canopus]

I'm not sure if there is any hard and fast legislation on who can and can't look at work kids produce at school.

[pumpkinpie]

Last year I had probelms at school and it is very easy for things to escalate. I wouldnt ignore this as it shows an entrenched misunderstanding of your son and his difficulties. I would keep a diary and also write / have meeting with school to discuss this. It is bullyiing and they havent the basic understanding to see it from your sons point of view who did as he asked but at his own level of understanding.

Things arent going to improve for hime until they look at their procedures, and idea of inclusion.

[Mother in Need]

I fully agree! I will endeavor to spend some time writing and writing the next time I have an hour or so free....

I am awaiting the report from the specialaist psychiatrc day unit he attended before Christmas, they were really good and very understanding, and are recommending intensive support for my son in school. The one problem there is ofcourse, the word 'intensive' is open to a lot of interpretation...

Once I've got that report I'll go in fully armed with it and also hopefully witht hat diary of things having gone wrong (which gets added to every single (part)day that I manage to get him there.

[Jill]

Absolutely appalling. Why didn't the teacher look at it and think "there's something wrong here, I've got a very sad child in my class and I am obviously not meeting his needs" and then DO something POSITIVE about it.

 

Personally I think this says far more about the bad teachers in the school than anything else.

 

She obviously can't take criticism & needs to grow up herself.

 

Sorry, rant over, sending you and your lad <'>

 

Document it and raise it with the school. This is so bad.

[UltraMum]

I am awaiting the report from the specialaist psychiatrc day unit he attended before Christmas, they were really good and very understanding, and are recommending intensive support for my son in school. The one problem there is ofcourse, the word 'intensive' is open to a lot of interpretation...

Once I've got that report I'll go in fully armed with it and also hopefully witht hat diary of things having gone wrong (which gets added to every single (part)day that I manage to get him there.

 

Ring up the unit and ask them to be specific in the report about what they see as 'intensive' - say it would help the school to know exactly what resources will be required - that way you have some real ammo - we did that when we got J seen by private SALT, EP and OT - made it so much easier to argue with the school/LEA

[Mother in Need]

Ring up the unit and ask them to be specific in the report about what they see as 'intensive' - say it would help the school to know exactly what resources will be required - that way you have some real ammo - we did that when we got J seen by private SALT, EP and OT - made it so much easier to argue with the school/LEA

I did that, but they said that they cannot dictate to the schools what they should implement, as they are only a health organisation and nothing to do with education. I am going to try again, and am awaiting their return call, but I am not holding my breath..