NickyB

Hi justine My son is 9 and has been for a sleepover with a friend who also has ASD, and is the same age. He's also been to us a couple of times and it's been fine. I would say that's it's not too young, as long as you know the family well enough. We are quite lucky, as we only live a few doors away from this friend, so it wouldn't be a massive problem if they couldn't cope. He has been for a sleepover with another friend who's NT, and he was fine there, too. I would suggest going with your instincts, because you won't be able to relax if you're not sure. How about inviting the other child for a sleepover at yours first, so then you can see how they get on? Nicky x

Hello peppa Just wondered how it's all going? Nicky x

How did the meeting go Peppa? x

Hello again That seems very open to interpretation to me as well It should state clearly exactly what is going to be done, how often, and by whom. You're most certainly not being fussy!! Nicky x

Wow you certainly have plenty of reports to go through! Good luck with it <'>

Hello Peppa Do you have the report that was done for the Statutory Assessment (usually done by an Educational Psychologist)? My son's proposed statement was very vague as well, so I went through Ed Psych report and highlighted everything that I could use to back up my request that they make the statement more specific and detailed. It then came back again with the number of hours of 1:1 specified, and it was very specific about supervision during playtimes. I also quoted the SEN Code of Practice section 8.37 which states that: LEAs must make decisions about which actions and provision are appropriate for which pupils on an individual basis. This can only be done by a careful assessment of the pupils’ difficulties and consideration of the educational setting in which they may be educated. Provision should normally be quantified (e.g. in terms of hours of provision, staffing arrangements) although there will be cases where some flexibility should be retained in order to meet the changing special educational needs of the child concerned. It will always be necessary for LEAs to monitor, with the school or other setting, the child’s progress towards identified outcomes, however provision is described. LEAs must not, in any circumstances, have blanket policies not to quantify provision. Hope that helps Nicky x

Hello Have you tried 'tangle toys' or 'fiddle toys'. I have a friend whose son has the same issues, and she has got him some of these There's a huge number of these kind of toys available from lots of different websites. It has made a big difference as he can put it in his mouth and chew to his heart's content! Hope that helps Nicky x

Oh that's good

Hi I've just had a look at the report from DSs interim review. It was just me, the class teacher, head of Unit and SENCO. It was held 6 months after he started at the unit, and was just to see how he was getting on. The main aim was to make sure that we were all happy and doing what was needed to support DS at school and home - nothing heavy or too formal. We've since had his annual review which was a more formal affair with lots of form-filling. Hope that helps Nicky x

Sally that's fantasctic news :clap: :clap: :clap:

Sally I'm keeping everything crossed

Hi everyone This might be a bit cheeky, but here goes..... My son's ASD unit is finally being rebuilt after many years of campaigning by the parents and staff. The PTA (known as PACT) are taking part in Nat West Community Force. The idea is that people vote for a project, and those that get the most votes get a share of the money being given by Nat West. We are trying to raise some money to get some sensory equipment for the new building, and the money we could get from this initiative would go a long way to helping with that. If you would like to vote for us, the address is http://communityforce.natwest.com/project/3627 You just have to give them your email address to avoid duplicate voting, and it doesn't cost anything. Closing date October 24th at midday. Thanks for reading Nicky <'>

Hello Marie Once you get the proposed statement, you then request any amendments you feel should be made, and name your preferred school. The process is explained in detail in the SEN code of practice which you can find here. Hoppe that helps Nicky <'>

Everything crossed here

Hello kerrie I think we might have already met on another forum. It's nice to see you on here too Nicky x

Hello Kerrie and welcome It's obviously very difficult to say whether Ryan has autism or not, but I certainly think there is enough in what you describe for you to ask for a professional opinion. Giving eye contact and being chatty wouldn't rule it out. My son, who is autistic, has good eye contact, and can talk forever about robots! Did your GP say they would refer you to anyone? If not, you could go back and talk to them again (perhaps ask to see a different doctor). It might be an idea to write things down - maybe keep a diary for a couple of weeks of all the things that are concerning you? It may well be that he doesn't have autism but there are obvious concerns that you need help with regardless of whether or not he is diagnosed with anything. You could try talking to the school SENCO (Special Educational Needs Co-ordinator). They may have picked up on his social issues, even if he is doing well in the classroom. I hope that helps x

I agree with the others, smiley - go and have a chat with your GP. It is his/her job to look after your health, and to help you overcome your issues. I've recently been suffering from anxiety and panic attacks, which came completely out of nowhere, and I went to see my GP. I've never had any problems of this nature before, so it was difficult for me to tell him, but it made me feel so much better, and I'm going to get some counselling. He didn't make any judgements or assumptions about me and I'm sure your doctor won't either. Hope you are feeling better soon x

That's wonderful news :clap: :clap:

Well done Ben We'll be round to yours next Sunday then .. and BD, you gush away - you have every right to be proud

done

Thanks everyone <'>

Hello everyone Sadly, on Sunday, my Mum passed away, quite suddenly and unexpectedly. She had not been well for many years but it was still a bit of a shock. The worst thing is that my brother and I both had a call from the nursing home to go straight away, but we were both too late, even though he's only 20 mins away The staff were with her, though, and they were amazing - they treated her with dignity and us with compassion. So just coming to terms with it now, and making arrangements Nicky x

Oh Tally I'm so, so sorry <'> >< <'> >< <'>

Hello forgetmenot I was in the same situation a few years ago with my son. He would hit, spit, kick and throw things, and as you say, his mood could change within seconds. It felt like he was totally in control of our family life. We came to the point where we realised that we had to regain control of the situation. We put firm sanctions in place for unacceptable behaviour. In his case he would have to sit on the stairs until told he could move (he really hated this as it was so boring). The first time we did this, he was very defiant and violent, and it took two hours to get him to sit down for five minutes. Over the following few weeks, the time it took got less and less. It was a horrendous time and it felt like it was never going to end. However, he is now fully aware of the consequences of his behaviour. We still use the same sanction if needs be, but it's very rare now. I know some people will think that we were cruel, but we now have a happy, confident, better behaved son who is much more in control of his emotions and behaviour. I'm not saying that we are perfect parents and that we haven't made many mistakes on the way, but it does feel like our family life has a better balance. I'm not suggesting for a moment that this would work for you or that you don't already do something along those lines, but perhaps you need some support to find some stategies that will work for you and your son. It may me worth talking to the school, as it helps if you approach things in the same way at home and at school. Consisitency is absolutley vital. I hope you don't think that I'm judging you at all - after all I don't know you. I just hope it might help to hear from someone who has 'been there, done that' and come through the other side. I guess we could spend hours blaming many things for our children's problems (fate, family, environment, the MMR jab etc.), but in the end it gets us nowhere. Whatever the possible causes, it doesn't alter the reality of the situation and the fact that there's no easy answer. I really hope you can find a way forward very soon. All the best. Nicky x

Hello nosila This may be of some help - I'm not familiar with the area so apologies if it's a bit of a distance : http://www.aspergers4herts.org/nas-social-groups/ Nicky <'>