Mannify

I'm apologising to anyone who may be reading, for the sheer and utter tedium of my self-angst over bloomin' snoring, of all the bloomin' things. It's just that sometimes, somehow, it helps to post my annoyance on here. But why I should inflict it on everyone, I've no idea. It's just snoring, for goodness' sake!

Seriously, I know I said that it's barely perceptible, but tonight it isn't. I doubt the neighbour's sleeping through this. Considering getting up and writing the night off completely as far as sleep is concerned. Coz it's 2:40ish, but there's not the slightest indication that the snoring is gonna subside any time soon. Sorry all, I know it's a bit navel-gazey to go on like this , and on normal nights I'll go back to improving my tolerance, but tonight's just a right-off. . Sorry.

I've been challenging myself to be more relaxed about the snoring, but it seems exceptionally loud tonight, unnaturally so. Do I get a dispensation for that?

Hope it goes well for you . An ed psych I spoke to recently said that her friend has AS and is doing great as a teacher. I know little more than that; it's second-hand and anecdotal, but encouraging, nonetheless.

It didn't work. Anyway, I got 114, and then I wasn't sure if I did it fairly enough, so I thought harder and got 116, which I guess is reasonably consistent. 114-116, which is apparently high-ish. Well, it said high, but it's possible to score way higher. I'm a bit confused by it, tbh.

:lol: :lol: I guess I'm catching up where my own issues are concerned because externals really were the issue for so many years i.e. one kid who went to sleep really late, one kid who woke up early, and one kid who woke up for breastfeeding intermittently, meaning that sleep only occurred at best at two hour intervals between 12 and 5. During that time I had a 50/50 chance of waking up with a headache, plus I did some pure all-nighters doing my degree. So now, finally, it's down to me (apart from the current acute snoring crisis, lol), and, like you say, I guess it will take time. But I think my sleep issues are ultimately not as profound as your traffic and sleep issues, so if you can find a way (albeit a tenuous, ever-shifting way) then I have every hope that I can .

Well, I'm glad you remain on this one, Sa Skimrande, anyway

Hey, but it's so nice to be on a forum where we can admit this stuff, isn't it?

I was always wetting myself as a kid because I just wouldn't leave what I was doing - even up in my teens .

Sometimes I can be totally singular in my thinking. I'm like that when writing essays. My last module of my degree didn't really do this to me, but the previous two did - I would get such a strong sense of 'flow' while writing an essay that I'd feel almost trance-like. It wouldn't occur to me to eat, and I was even in danger of wetting myself . And while I was in that state I would write things that were above my usual cognitive ability while not in 'flow'.

His teachers are on the frontline with him day in, day out and are in a better position to see consistencies and patterns in his behaviour which a professional who assesses him for a brief window of time is less able to do. When our son was diagnosed it was a unanimous decision across a board of five professionals. They had no doubt about his diagnosis. Nonetheless, there was one ed psych a while back who insisted that his profile was the combined result of 'cognitive deficiency' (yes, she actually used that term) and parental rubbishness, basically, which is always a joy for a parent to hear . But her opinion was based on a brief encounter with him, and she is the only professional who has ever dealt with him who has ever doubted that he's autistic. So, the point is that a single professional sometimes does fail to see what other professionals around the child, and the child's parents, see. Try not to let this dishearten you too much, and keep making records via videos, diaries and recordings which make the points that you need to prove. Hope you go ok.

A little incident today illustrates the point quite well, and made me smile afterwards. The Tesco delivery was scheduled for between 1 and 3 today. There's an adorable Tesco delivery man who comes quite regularly and has a real raport with our dog - she loves him. Today he came two hours early because he had a gap in his schedule, and came on the off-chance that I'd be in and that it'd be convenient. Because he was two hours early and I wasn't expecting him, I opened the door with a vacant 'can I help you?' look on my face. He looked bemused and said, 'It's Tesco', and at that moment our dog ran to greet him in the way she does with him and he simultaneously turned so that I could see the Tesco moniker on his bright yellow coat; and I realised how daft I'd been. Thankfully he was lovely enough not to be offended .

Woah! I slept for five unbroken hours last night! Don't know what that was about. Normally, having gone to bed between 12and 1, I wake up at 4 (no idea what's so special about 4) snoring or no snoring, and then the existence or absence of snoring dictates whether I get to go back to sleep, and recently the snoring has generally won out. But last night I didn't wake up 'til 5:30, and there was no snoring, so I went back to sleep again for a while. Life's so random, ain't it? The thing about the eating noises is that I would do my best not to eat while such noises were being made - just a bean here and a kernel of sweetcorn there until the others finished, and I would eat then, and I did my scratchy nail thing in the interim. I've never lived next to such a busy road. Must be a right bummer You're right that psychology plays a huge part, coz a lot of people would find the snoring barely perceptible. It's loud, but our guest sleeps on the first floor, whereas I'm on the second floor, so the snoring is not intrusive enough to be a problem for most people, but i) I really am more intolerant than most of the slightest hint of snoring, and ii) the circumstance under which I am subjected to the snoring is an issue, and has no definable terminus. I think the second aspect is making me particularly resistant to solutions. But, as you say, I'm only making myself suffer, really. It would help loads if I could attain your level of objectivity with regard to the traffic; I mean if I could do that generally it would really help, even beyond the issues surrounding the guest. I have with some things - I mean if you could hear my kids eat... One night I tried to find a 'relaxed element' to my snoring sensitivity because the iPad wasn't charged, so I thought I'd try to get by without it, but I gave up and ended up stalking around the house trying to find the charger. I really wish I could just defeat my own sllly self . Coz my husband snores, and I know that I'm the problem more than his snoring (but I can prod him). Like I say, the circumstances surrounding the current snoring issue are particularly prohibitive in finding that 'relaxed element', but maybe I should grow up a bit, lol, and get on with it, because, as you say, who am I hurting here? I think that music has to remain part of the equation (yeah, still NIN - best 'coverage'), but beyond that it has to be me. I know that, really, but then when I'm confronted with it I'm rubbish again. But it's probably a good thing to reassess myself and stop getting so hett up at externals, though. I'll try. And I need to get a music pillow, lol. Haven't got around to getting that yet.

Well, there's no point getting into something that just a load of hassle and of no benefit to anyone involved, including him, is there?

Our son (he's 7 ) can be quite rough with our dog, although she takes it amazingly well, and they have a beautiful bond. But we did find that we had to keep saying, " If she does that, it means she doesn't like it", and we point out signs such as pulling her head away, or putting her tail down. It's still a work in progress, he still doesn't always get it right, but by repeating the signs that she's not happy, he is gradually coming to a better understanding of her, which I think in turn will help him with his interpersonal skills on some levels.

Charming

How do you feel about what they said? Do you agree?

Sorry, I don't want to be uniquely annoying, but is this guy a troll as such? It's true that he appears consistently unable to interact well with other forum users. He may well seem unpleasant and rude. But if that is his natural persona, then surely he's just being true to himself? Doesn't a troll tend to present themselves as something they're not, or say things simply for the effect? But there is some consistency with this guy. I'm not saying 'take his unpleasantness', because there is reason not to choose to interact with someone who will make you feel rubbish. I'm just not sure he's a troll, as such, that's all.

mutton

Well, it might work in terms of preventing me from becoming a homicidal psychopath, but I'm not sure where sleep comes in. But you're focussing on the 'homicidal psychopath' bit, aren't you? Coz sometimes you do have to expect that sleep ain't gonna happen and you have to prioritise not murdering anyone. Sure, ok, I'll give it a go. It reminds me a bit of how I used to cope with noisy eating as a kid (and still do if I'm desperate). I used to rest my head on one hand and press that bit of my ear in that can cover the ear-hole if you press it (and that Robert would be able to name) with my finger and then scratch or tap the nail of that finger with my other nail (do you follow?). The noise was loud and personal enough to cancel out noises to some extent, and it would work with just one hand, so it didn't look like I was putting my hands over my ears, which would have been a bit provocative, really, and possibly not as effective.

Hmmm, well he certainly does seem chronically grumpy.

Don't give up. I've been told recently by a psych who heads a diagnostic panel that I have AS. I think it's pretty mild, tbh, but the point is, I'm 35 and I really had given up on friendship beyond the family ( apart from two occasional contact friends), and had tried to convince myself that it didn't really matter anyway, coz I had my family. But friendship has come my way. The trouble with friendship is that it can neither be predicted nor forced, and I think that that is the case whether AS is present or not. It's hard to know from where friendship might come, but don't give up on it, and I would say, try to keep possible sources of friendship as open as possible i.e. continue to involve yourself in things with which you feel comfortable, but that which may offer friendship - any groups you go to, online opportunities, that sort of thing. I can't guarantee that anything will come of it because that's not how it works, unfortunately. But friendship is less likely to occur if you isolate yourself through discouragement. I'm not an oracle, and I'm not much good at advice, but I can tell you from experience that your mid- thirties, or any other time, is no good reason to give up. Don't give up.

Do you have friends nearby?