Kazzen161

When ESA make a decision, they also decide how long it could be before reassessment - the longest T has had was 18 months and the shortest 6 months. You son should be getting some sort of benefit - if not ESA then JSA. Housing Associations are often understanding if they know that he will be getting benefits of some kind and therefore his rent will be paid. My son was without any money at all for 6 weeks due to DWP errors - he had just moved into a flat and could not pay the rent or buy any furniture. The site http://www.benefitsandwork.co.uk/ is very useful. It has excellent guides on how to claim and appeal.

I do and I have a guard (properly made via the dentist) which I find OK. I did quite a lot of damage to my teeth in a short time before this. My youngest son does too, and he has also managed to chew his way through his guard in only a few months! I don't know what the dentist will recommend when he goes back.

I agree with Justine - how he behaves at your house can differ from how he is at their's. When my ex and I split, T's behaviour deteriorated badly but we did not know he had AS then. Looking back, such big changes in his life just made the AS aspects more obvious. He was very confused and anxious. He used to spend a lot of time with his Dad fixing things (which was one of his obsessions) and then he no longer could. My ex did not have to get him to school in the mornings or get him to do his homework - he just used to let him do things that he liked doing when he was with him, so he didn't have any problems. We did start off by having family therapy and T had counselling, but it became obvious it was not just because his Dad had left, there was more to it. My ex refused to accept there was anything wrong with our son (he even told the psychiatrist she was wrong), even though all the professionals, teachers and me agreed and he is a classic case of AS (does nearly everything you read about). My ex did finally accept it after about 10 years.

Not all schools are the same, and these schools are "specialist" schools = specialising in AS/ASD/ADHD. If my son had not gone to such a school he would not be able to live independently, as he now does and his behaviour would still be too challenging to live in the community.

Independent schools don't bow to pressure from the LA, so when you visit it, if you can explain why you think Mark College cannot meet all his needs (and say that you have seen North Hill and believe they can) they will often back you up. They don't want or need children there whose parents don't agree with the school choice/ethos or whose child's needs they cannot fully meet. Both North Hill and Farleigh backed up my argument to the LA that a specific Cambian school could better meet his needs and chose not to offer him a place.

Why have they not suggested either Farleigh College or North Hill? Both are also Priory schools but are AS specific?

Well, we went 20 miles to the medical assessment and were there all of 10 minutes. She said she had enough evidence from the ESA50 and notes, and said she did not know why we had been called in. What a waste of everyone's time. Hopefully he wil stay in the WRAGroup.

It is a horrible form - worse than the DLA one. We have to go to an ESA medical on Sunday for my son (even though he was assessed as in the WRAGroup in Jan and given it for 2 years. But he got a job that did not work out, so we are back at the beginning again!). I am not looking forward to it.

Does he have a statement? If not, can you afford to pay the fees for an independent school? How was he when he was going to school (academically/behaviourally/socially)? What County do you live in (so we can suggest schools)? Sometimes once the child has seen the specialist school and realised that the other children are like them, they feel more positive about the school.

There is no medium rate for mobility - only a low and high rate. There is however also a low, medium and high rate for care. You can get one or both parts of DLA and each can be at a different rate. It is hard (though not impossible) to get high rate mobility unless the person is physically disabled. In very basic terms - high rate care means they need a lot of care during both day and night, medium care rate means they need a lot of care during either day or night, and low rate care means they need a little care during day or night.

It can take some time (months) before any Ofsted report is published after a visit and even longer before it is put on-line. The only tracking systems I know of purely track a child's progress (in math's and literacy) over the year/s. They show whether a child is making expected progress or more or less. This is useful, but is not the same as an IEP.

Once they get a medical certificate, ESA put you on the assessment rate. This continues until they make a decision and you are put into either the WRA or SUPPORT group, then you get more money. This should happen within 13 weeks of first applying.

I have been getting itchy ears and throat with my hayfever for 40+ years. It is an annoying itch becasue you cannot get to it to scratch it.

It is worth finding out more about the PRU, but I would guess that they have 60+% of children with ASD just because it is the easy option if they cannot cope in mainstream, not because it is the right place for them to be. Do check if the PRU placement would be full-time, as round here it usually is only for a few half day sessions per week. Check what training/expertese the staff have in AS/ADHD. Check what curriculum they offer (full range of subjects/Chance to take exams? Social/living/independence skills? Also check if he would stay there til 16. You also need to be thinking about what will happen at 16+. Round here the PRUs are supposed to be short term pacements while preparing the child to return to mainstream or to find a more suitable placement - when the LA use them for long term placements, the PRU are not happy. I find it hard to believe that the PRU would be better than a specialist residential school, but I suppose it would be better than him being out of school completely if you could get him to go there. Personally, I would be looking at solving the issues at his current school or looking for a more suitable specialist school (Have you looked at Breckenbrough School in N Yorks?). I would also attempt to get him to try anti-depressants, even if he only agrees to try them for 3 months. When you are depressed, you do not believe that anything will help, but medication helped my son through a bad patch. It is worth noting that you say he came off his ADHD meds in May and also that he stopped going to lessons in May - maybe he does need those meds - maybe it is the depression that is masking the ADHD behaviours? Would he agree to try taking them again for a while?

Is the residential school as/asd specific? How do the LA think the PRU is going to suceed where the residential school failed? What expertese/training do the staff at the PRU have?

R ticked the disability box on his Waitrose application and he still got the job. He did the night shift at Sainsbury's over Xmas and enjoyed it. For permanent posts both supermarkets often do "group" interviews. It may be useful to get some adivce from the job centre on these (R did OK once he knew how they worked).

Could be hayfever. I get itchy ears (and an itchy throat). My hayfever has been bad for the past few weeks.

Years ago I used to get these in Peacocks or Woolworths - I haven't seen charcoal grey ones though. They were shiny on the outside and fleecy on the inside. Do they have a plan for how he will get changed for PE if he does not wear underwear?

I have just checked the ESA form and it only asks whether you live with your parents and if so, whether you pay towards the rent/mortgage. T's first ESA award was for 6 months, then it was for longer and the last one was for 18 months - the person who makes the decision decides when you should be reassessed. T has only had to attend one set of "Pathways to Work" sessions (over 6 weeks) so far. I am not sure if you can claim ESA whilst working, but you may be able to claim Working Tax Credit depending on your income last year. You may be entitled to a Disability Element of WTC too.

I didn't think ESA asked about parents income. You don't have to be unable to work to get ESA, but you do have to find it harder to get/keep a job than most other people. You need to fill the form in carefully so do get help. You don't necessarily have to fill in the ESA50 form every 6 months - it depends on the doctor's opinion - my son's latest claim was awarded for 18 months. If you cannot get ESA, check if you can get Working Tax Credit.

I get hayfever. I have been taking my meds for it and it has been OK most of the summer, but I have been sneezing a lot and my eyes were sore for the past three days, so maybe the pollen count is extra high at the moment?

I agree with Mandapanda - now the 6 year old is old enough to want (and has the right to do) some of the same things that the eldest does, you will need to have rotas and routines to ensure there are not arguments. Tell your 6 year old (and your eldest) to come to you if there is a disagreement and not to get involved in fights with his brother - as they both get older that can become very dangerous. Make sure you do deal with any arguments (and fairly) if the chidlren do come to you. If there are arguments, do not leave them to fight it out - intervene and separate them, send them both to separate places to calm down. Children with AS do not usually have the control that similar aged NT children have, to stop when it gets out of hand or to adjust their power to suit their opponent - it takes some time to teach them to walk away and go to ask for help.

I would not mention school 2 to the LA until you have seen it and are sure it would be better for your child. I would start in Sept trying to ensure school1 does follow the statement and keep evidence of meetings and of what it does or does not do, whilst also visiting school 2. I would also suggest visiting some more AS specific schools, so you get an idea of what a good school can do (even if you do not decide to push for one of them). Although your child's attitude might not be changed, good schools will know how to work with it.

Some questions: What steps have you taken to make school 1 improve their provision? Have you told the LA of your concerns about school 1? Does school 2 have an available place for your child? Does school 2 have other children funded by your LA? How can you be certain that school 2 CAN do the things that school 1 does not (I presume you thought school 1 could do these things originally)? Are the transport costs for school 2 the same or less than for school 1? How is "child does not want the support - dont want to be seen as different from peers despite difficulties" going to be better at school 2?

You could ask the Head at Grateley House if she could suggest any other schools that might be suitable. They do well with very challenging children, but sometimes Grateley proves to be not enough and they work with the parents and child to get them into a more suitable school.