Why?

[Mumble]

I've just been asulted at the bus stop on the way home from uni. And I feeling so positive when I left. I hate this up and downness and unpredictability of the world and people. The trouble was it was entirely my own stupid fault for being AS and not reacting properly. I was waiting for the bus with several others around me trying to ignore everyone and this pair of 'youths' came along with a huge unleashed 'look at me I'm so hard' type of grizzly could kill you with one bite dog that was jumping up at the people waiting. And the people waiting just ignored it but I had to go and over-react. Those of you who were with me when I over-reacted at a normal dog on Saturday know how terrified of them I am, so you can imagine how I was with this one. It's not that I stop and think, I know, I don't like that dog, I'll freak out, it's instant, I have no control over myself at that stage. Instinct took over and I leapt sideways, but unfortunatly there was a rather big male passenger standing there and I knocked into him and set him bag swinging. I retreated quickly backwards but this man clearly wasn't happy and asked if I wanted some. Mumble's brain didn't kick in and work out what he meant and without thinking I asked him 'some what?'. As you can guess he wasn't impressed, swung his bag over at me and wacked me across my side yelling that I was a retard and should go back to the asylum. I've cut my arm and it's all really red. It'll have to be long-sleaved shirts for the next few days. What annoyed me even more was that none of the other 20 or so passengers did anything - they just stood waiting for their buses - oh, apart from one who loud whispered 'yeah wierdo' when the man said I should go to the asylum. I'm so fed up with people's reactions - why can't they accept that we're all different and have different fears and anxieties. Why is it that people when they don't understand someone use physical force instead of their brain. I shouldn't have expected any less - it's always been Mumble's wierd, let's hit Mumble. I just suppose I though the world would be more tollerant than it clearly is.

[David Matthew Baker]

<'> <'> <'> <'>

[llisa32]

<'> Mumble...lets be clear...you did nothing that any other person petrified of dogs would not have done..my hubby being one of them.

 

You were unfortunate to be in the midst of some ignorant and stupid people, who took advantage more likely of the fact you are female and were prob perceived to be a bit shy. Please please ignore the comments they made - they are idiots! and will clearly not go on to achieve half of what you are destined for.

 

Truely sorry you had a rubbish end to your day - esp when you'd managed to remain positive

 

Keep strong...those idiots are not worth your thoughts

 

Thinking of you <'>

[Bagpuss]

That is dispicable Mumble. No, it wasn't your fault. That fella did not need to react like that, surely he could of seen you were terrified! What awful terminology to use too. Your right though about people not intervening.....I think the fear of what may happen to them stops them.

 

Sending you lots and lots of cyber hugs <'> <'> <'> <'> <'>

[jb1964]

Hi Mumble,

 

Life does seem unfair - my daughter is frightened by dogs and would definitely have had the same reaction - plus the 'some what' question, no matter what the reasons for anything it doesn't give anyone the right to hit you or be verbally abusive when you've done nothing wrong. And from what I've read if you're the 'weirdo' and he's the 'norm' - then I'd rather be a 'weirdo' anyday.....

 

Take care, chin up,

Jb

Edited July 17, 2007 by jb1964

[pearl]

<'> mumble <'>

[David Matthew Baker]

I'd be tempted to report the incident to the police if you feel upto it. He shouldn't be able to get away with that. He has no resonable reason to act in the way he did. I wish people would be more understanding of others. Hopefully you can find some friends who can look out for you. You don't deserve what happened in any way. I'd also let the uni/college know as it is another example of why you really need the support sorting out right now. If a nasty looking dog jumped up at me or someone near me to be honest I'm not sure how I'd react. There are certain dogs I can be a bit jumpy around. I also wish people wouldn't keep pets if they can't look after them properly and control them. That animal sounds as if it was totally out of control. As I said hopefully this might spur the Uni/College into action. I hope your not hurt too badly and it doesn't take you too long to get over the shock of tonights events. <'> <'> <'>

[krystaltps]

<'> <'> <'>

The only people who did anything wrong today were the youths with the large dog (they obviously shouldn't own a dog if they cannot train it properly), the ignorant s*d who verbally abused you and the idiot who agreed with him - NOT YOU, you reacted as anyone with a fear of dogs would.

[Clare63]

<'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'>

Oh Mumble, I am so sorry to hear about your expereince, you certainly did not to anything wrong and like Jb says a lot of people are frightened of dogs and I think that includes most people, dog lovers or not when an animal is unruly and not being controlled properly. As a dog owner myself I feel very embarrassed about other dog owners who do not respect how other people might feel, and fail to keep their animals undercontrol, people are so quick to say "he/she is alright he won't hurt you" but if someone has a real fear comments like that make no diffierence. As for the guy who lumped you with his bag....what his problem ?? whilst it does not excuse his behaviour and no way should he have assulted you, maybe he too was afriad of the dog, the youths or even his personal space !!! who knows we are all different. Hope you are able to put this behind you, and stop blaming yourself, remember its good to talk, well on here anyway and as you hopefully know we are all here for you.

 

Clare x x x

[Mumble]

Thanks everyone I've calmed down a bit now but I'm still jittery. The trouble is I don't like taking the bus anyway, so something like this makes me more fearful of it. I think I might take the train tomorrow (although it's much more expensive). My arm's really sore - I've put some Savlon on it, but there's not much else I can do. I'm now annoyed more than anything. I have a difficult morning ahead tomorrow and I really should be sleeping but I know I'll lie awake fretting.

 

Mumble

[Clare63]

Oh Mumble its a shame its so painful as it will act as a nasty reminder. I truly hope it does not ruin your day tomorrow.

 

Clare x

[Kathryn]

Not surprising that you feel bad after this experience but it's absolutely not your fault, Mumble. There are people with anger management problems who will overreact to the slightest thing. It sounds as though the man with the bag was one of those, and if it hadn't been you it would probably have been anyone else who happened to get in his way. As for the dog owner - he should have kept his dog under control: even people who normally like dogs don't necessarily want to be pawed and slavered over by them.

 

<'> <'>

 

I hope tomorrow brings some positives to cancel out this experience.

 

K x

[Bullet]

The man behaved appallingly Mumble. I hope your arm's better soon.

[hev]

mumble i am frightened of dogs and would have reacted the same

 

the so called man at the bus stop was a bully,it wasent your fault <'>

[elun1]

<'> mumble <'>

[KarenT]

Sorry you had to experience this Mumble. Other people's attitudes at fault, not you. I hope you're feeling better today. DLTBGYD, as they say.

 

Karen

x

[brooke]

So sorry this happened i hope you feel a bit better today <'>

Brooke

[Wicce]

I hope your arm feels better soon Mumble. I'm sorry this has happened to you. People can be such idiots.

[marmalade]

Awww....poor Mumble.

Wasn't your fault at all, sweetie.

You can't help being scared of out of control dogs, let's face it, who doesn't feel jittery when a hound from hell is leaping and lurking about??

I hope that your arm is feeling better today and that the whole experience will soon be forgotten. He was a horrible man and I hope he had a really really bad day and he was late for where ever he was going, and his bag broke, and his dinner was burnt and gave him indigestion!!

[mrs.ddh]

Mumble,

 

I have owned dogs all my life, but when I go to the park and there are yobbos there with their dogs running loose and looking fierce - I too become petrified. Last year I had several run-ins with one dog and his awful owner and I ended up going to the park at different times to try and avoid them both - when that didn't work I rang the Dog Warden and reported the incidents. You should have a dog warden for your area too. Try looking in the council's listing.

 

My heart goes out to you, sugar. Ditto on what everyone else said - None of what happened, nor how you reacted, was your fault. Scary dogs and scary people are scary. And shame on those people who failed to come to your assistance or defense.

 

ddh

[lynyona]

<'> <'> <'> <'> Mumble <'> <'> <'>

 

It wasnt your fault i know kieran would have acted in the very same way.unfortunately there are mindless morons out there, sounds like you came across a couple of them but there was definately no need for the verbal abuse that you had to put up with.

[David Matthew Baker]

Are you at university most days. If you are have you thought of getting a train season ticket. That at least takes about 1/3rd off the price from memory. Must admit I wish train travel was cheaper as it is my prefered method of travel. Well perhaps after my car know days. I can see why people like the added freedom.

[tsmom]

Mumble <'> <'>

the man sounds a nasty person who just enjoys being mean.I have a dog but i hate seeing dogs not being controled by the owner.

None of what happened was your fault,i hope yr arm is better.

[tsmom]

Mumble <'> <'>

the man sounds a nasty person who just enjoys being mean.I have a dog but i hate seeing dogs not being controled by the owner.

None of what happened was your fault,i hope yr arm is better.

[bikergal]

<'> <'> <'> Mumble , hope you're feeling a bit less shaky now. I'm not especially afraid of dogs but I am afraid of anything related to people, I seem to be in a constant state of high anxiety...my daughter is too... <'> Those people were ignorant...I find it sad that not one of them tried to intervene.

[bid]

<'>

 

Bidx

[Mumble]

Thank you everyone. I've tried not to let it effect me, though I was very shaky getting on the bus coming home today. I think it was more obvious than I thought, because another passenger asked if I was ok. So maybe there are some ok people out there.

 

That's a good idea David, but it's still very expensive - more than 3 times the cost of the bus if I have to go in at peak time.

[David Matthew Baker]

You can't convince your college to provide transport then as part of what you need. I would explain what happened to them and perhaps see if they can organise an alternative means of travel. Glad to hear things went better today. Hope you manage to regain your confidence soon. <'> <'>

[Mumble]

You can't convince your college to provide transport then as part of what you need. I would explain what happened to them and perhaps see if they can organise an alternative means of travel. Glad to hear things went better today. Hope you manage to regain your confidence soon. <'> <'>

I've been assessed to get transport (taxi) to cut down on the stress of using public transport if I have to go to any town/city I don't know as part of my course, but not to get to the uni. Generally though I opt to walk, because one thing I can do is map read and I find walking time helps me get my thoughts together. Unfortuantly my hall is a bit too far to walk as it's 23 minutes on the bus.

[Canopus]

This is absolutely awful. It disgusts me that situations like this happen in this day and age. It's no surprise that I avoid London at all costs because there are too many obnoxious people around who HIT back hard if you even look at their path, let alone cross it. I have been punched, called all sorts of rude names, had things thrown at me, and pushed down an escalator whilst using public transport in London by mindless morons.

[David Matthew Baker]

I'm sure that there are as many people in London who would stop and help if someone really needs it. I think the problem with ASD is that it is a invisible disability. That said if people understood they would help. I do think that in general though people in the South rush around a lot more and don't have as much time for others. Certainly that is always what I think about cities in the south compared to the north. I get a lot more people who are willing to say hello or help me when I'm wandering around up here. The entire atmosphere I often think feels more relaxed up North. That said I expect most of the people on here would be friendly.

Edited July 18, 2007 by David Matthew Baker

[LittleRae]

Hope you're ok Mumble - would have reacted the same to the dog. <'> >< I think though that you should go to the college Medical Officer/Doctor tomorrow just to have it on record in case it happens again

Edited July 18, 2007 by LittleRae

[pragmatic]

Dear Mumble,

 

What a terrible experience <'> >< <'> - I will reiterate every thing said; nothing that has happened was your fault. The use of language is disgusting but there are lots of disgusting people around us even though that ASD is an invisible disability yet this person's reactions and attitudes are completely unacceptable and there are no excuse what so ever.

 

 

Please please try not to let this incident put you off- keep doing what you are doing and take the bus to uni- you can meet idiots all over the place in trains/streets everywhere you name it-- just keep positive and remember that you have done so much and you are capable of doing so much and just try to forget this incidence as much as you can.

 

 

All best wishes

 

Pragmatic

[barefoot wend]

Mumble

 

What a horrible thing to happen. Hope you manage to put it behind you and not let it interfere with how you live your life. The guy was obviously a complete idiot!

 

Barefoot