The Batcave

[smiley]

Badders - my jaw hurts and my tummy is aching - that had me in fits of giggles

 

[annie]

Sorry I didn't get back on here for my much needed rave up........had friends visit, can everyone make it tomorrow?

 

I have just managed to read part two of Pillockio. Badders you genius you . You could give J K Rowling's a run for her money. Just think, in a few years time everybody will be saying Harry Potter who's he? Toys 'r' us will be melting down models of the ginger one and remoulding them into little Pillockios.

 

Just be careful if a bloke called Quentin Tarintino gets in touch with you begging to direct the film, he might make you millions, but I fear he might just lose the true story somewhere along the line...........and I know you Badders, you wouldn't want to sell out just for the sake of money, would you?

[Flora]

The clock's a time machine !!!!!!!!!!!! Well blow me down with a feather! I knew there was something odd about it since first I did see it

 

Perhaps it's a door into another land? Could we find ourselves in the undiscovered far corners of ninia? Is mel at this moment eating heaps of turkish herbish delights? Should we go and rescue her before she goes over to the dark side? The corrupting powers of turkish herbish delights know no bounds

[Flora]

ps... brilliant inspired work of genius by badad loved every word... thank you!

 

Lauren

[littlenemo]

Merci, mon brave

It made me grin, oui

 

A demain

 

personne

[Malika]

Parfait Monsieur Baber. C'est tres bien Le CHEF c'est vous .......

 

Tres drole Tres drole , Quelle histoire, made me look twice around my pond, to find out any garlic plantation, and PARSLEY (don't FRoget the parsley) just in case the Chef would have heard my "Bah Goop" I could be in Danger to be swamped over , with the neighbourg watching over the fence always on the bad side of it. ....................I better keep a low profile as she likes foreign dish.....................

[reuby2]

Knock Knock

who's there

Me

Me who

mEooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooow

 

Can I come in? Prettty purrlease?

I have my own cat suit.......lycra

All I need is a warm place to stay near the fire?? with some milk and cookies.

It's cold outside the batcave.

[baddad]

Knock Knock

  who's there

Me

  Me who

  mEooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooow

 

Can I come in? Prettty purrlease?

I have my own cat suit.......lycra

All I need is a warm place to stay near the fire?? with some milk and cookies.

It's cold outside the batcave.

Oh Pussy Cat, Pussy Cat where have you been?

Did you nick off to London to visit the Queen?

'Cos if you look back at the pages before

You'll see you had gone when we opened our door

Of COURSE you are welcome

To join on our mission

(but with an oufit like that

you'll be soon propositioned

So avoid you the Judge -

Th degenerate old Sop,

and avoid any offers of cookies and gold top)

 

Sighhhhhhhh. I'm my own worst enemy....

Any chance a simple 'yes' would have done?

L&P

BD

[reuby2]

PRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

I'll just settle down to wait till the party starts later,

Wake me up before you go ,go!!!!!

[Flora]

Lauren curls up in the cave with chocolates, tea, a snuggly blankie and the remote control.

 

Can't wait for part 3 of badanory I'll just watch the box while I'm waiting.

 

Lauren

[reuby2]

oooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhh if you've got chocolate i'm moving near you.

[littlenemo]

Seeing as winter's coming and we all need perking up

 

How's about some fruity tacos for tea tonight?

Fruity flash food

 

Not for badad, of course - he doesn't eat veggie food - far too manly

[Suze]

Oooooh............like the sound of those..................Lauren whats your new pussy cat called..........think it might need a name.........and who is that under that blankie with you .............................O.K. peeps Legs Akimbo has had a day of recuperation following her run in with the egg -o- tastical Deputy Head............so my fellow super dudes tonight is cheer up Legs night I shall be performing my one woman stand up show . ,to the chants of egg we go egg we go egg we go.......egg we go egg we go egg we go oooo.My performance will be eggstremely entertaining......shall be dressed in a chicken suit bit along the lines of big bird with massive chicken feet.Judgey has kindly offered to join me as my trusty assistant he of course is cocky the cockerel. Shall now scramble into my costume that I poached from Mr.Ben........... the crowd are boiling up to a proper frying frission of anticipation....................Suze takes the stage to loud thunderous applause head a twitching chicken like.....lovely fat buxom chicken breasts ...........Cocky the cockerel follows on stage ...a slightly weedier specimen but large tail feathers and a loud ###### -a -doodle never the less...................now sorry really have to go toddler crisis here if anyone wants to finish off be my guess shall be back after X factor

[lil_me]

A ?av quite a soft spot for zem in truth ? a peat bog in County Durham hahaha

 

 

I'v never noticed any myself, few smelly bogs but no peat ones

[Suze]

................sorry had a pooh in the pants episode with 3yr old, then it was time to order the chinese......then Xfactor, just got the youngest 2 to bed.........eldest ASD is building in his bedroom...........so I,m back............from outta space..........I just walked in here to find chickens ...everywhere......... seems we,ve gone free range while I was gone...........trust Judgey to get more birds round the place ..................eggs!........eggs!.........eggs everywhere, we are now stock pile-ing...........Cinders has of course a new device....the scrambler................does what your normal simple singular egging would do , but on a grander buy one get one free type of scale .Well now thats been sorted I feel it,s time for a good old knees up ....knees up mutha brown.........knees up mutha brown.........crack open the the pinot grigio..refreshers for Legs............I need a nibble ....sorry nibbles............Mel come out from the clock ............did no one tell you tis a tardis...............oh yes ..........Cinders is a Time Lord .

[baddad]

Thought 'Down' typed 'Durham'... Have no idea if there are actually any peat bogs in Co. Down, just know it's in Ireland where there are some peat bogs, 'n' that's close enough for me as an excuse for a poor joke!

And before it comes up, I know saffron strands are more yellow than ginger, and they're not strong enough to throttle a frog with!

L&P

The historically/geographically/horticulturally innacurate,

BD

[call me jaded]

Two words:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

BIRD FLU!!

 

[bid]

The BatCave is way too scary for The Female Inquisitor these days!

 

Bid

[baddad]

The bodies of superheroes sprawl across the floors and furniture - not one left standing. Legs had been the last to succumb to the supervirus - had struggled valiantly (and somewhat ironically) to keep spirits up and temperatures down with regular infusions of chicken soup...

As a lone tumbleweed blows throw the labyrinth tunnels, only a gentle clucking is heard, and - somewhere in the distance - a crackling radio broadcast at low volume;

"There aint nobody here but us chickens".....................................................

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And then Bobby Ewing popped out of the shower, and it had all been a terrible dream!!

 

 

Jaded - 3 words:

 

 

 

UP

 

 

 

YOUR

 

 

 

***

 

L&P

BD

[annie]

Legs awakens , all the talk of chickens and eggs was a bad dream. Judgey was banging on the bathroom door, "Oi Legs, 'urry up, there's a queue out 'ere". Quickly, Legs pulls the plug out of the jacuzzi, dries off and opens the bathroom door. "Sorry I took so long Judgey, first attempt at a Brazillian, got in a bit of a curfuffle, ended up more Isle of Wight" exclaimed Legs, as she went off to find her hair straighteners.

 

Thirty minutes later, the Angels are fully glammed up and in desperate need of food, drink and a good night . Mel ran straight over to the karoke, her favourite possession apart from her orange traffic cone . Suze, Legs and Lauren grabbed the Pinot, Twiglets and Refreshers.

[reuby2]

MMMMmmmm...........................streeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeetch.........

.........................................

Is anyone there?

Gosh I was dreaming about hens....eggs...and chick,chick..............

chicko time!!!!!

 

Meeoow I think i'll just have another little ...........just a little .....

mmeeowzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

..........................zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

[Malika]

Oh Reuby

 

I know instinct is great , but remember better be safe than sorry keep away from the chicken breast and legs

 

as Jaded says

 

BIRD

 

FLUE

 

give you the chill

 

I am sure it will

 

no matter the feather on their wing.

 

may be master Badder

 

could come up with some

 

Puss in Boots and chicken soupe

 

what a tale, but not for sale!

 

While jack now gave froggie the sack who couldn't sing the national hymne and started on with a "God! save the Queen " from chicken flue

 

"Do I look like the Queen "say Jack Chirac "shame on you froggie there is no hopping back to France for you, "

 

Not that froggie ever wanted to.......she likes her pond colder but much safer

 

than "sur le POND d'Avignon......on y dance tous en rond"..............................

 

on y dance .....dance ....

 

No music, radio off.. silence... chicken heart beating....loudly....and Pussy who has

 

left his boots in the cave miew..........MIEW>>>>>>>>>>iew ....iew.....

[Suze]

.............Malika love your bouncing frogs .....now I could do with something like that , now then.....how to change that avatar.......this might take some time............................................................................

..........................

[baddad]

 

That must be one hell of a paddling pool - They've been pumping the ###### thing up since 6.00 this morning!

 

Moral: never place your paddling pool near the bramble-bushes, only in the centre of a well tended lawn...

Yours sincerely

 

Alan Titmarsh

[annie]

Frog on Left, "So how would you sum up being a frog".

 

Frog on right, "Well, it has it's ups and downs".

 

 

 

Yeah, I know, It's bad, but it's the best I could come up with

[Malika]

Thanks MR Badder and Annie give me the giggle...

 

Most needes after roast chicken.....(it's all true) and dishes, bath ttime and home work......and still to come the BE(st)D time............................

 

Malika.

[DaisyProudfoot]

Tatters awakens from a weekend of bird flu ..................out of it again..................those wings made me twice as bad as the rest of the batcave.....................and while under I had a terrible dream...............about time machines, chickens and ..................oooooh hello pussy cat!..........where did you appear from?..................I'm gettting flashbacks to shiny red stones, two perhaps.........a premonition methinks that you appear in our midst.................you won't try to eat me with my tattered wings I hope?

 

And of tangent, a joke perhaps:

 

Man walks past a second hand record store and sees a vinyl LP in the window entitled "Wasp sounds of Europe."

 

Wow, he thinks, I am the world renowned expert on wasp sounds I think I should take a listen to this.

 

He goes into the store and asks the shop assistant he if can have a listen. The assistant puts it on a turntable and the man takes a listen.

 

After a minute or so he says to the shop assistant: "I am the world renowned expert on wasp sounds, but I don't recognise this."

 

"Oh, I'm sorry," says the shop assistant I'll try track two. So the man listens to trak two for a while and says: "I am the world renowned expert on wasp sounds, but I don't recognise this either."

 

"What about track three then," says the shop assistant, and he plays track three. A few moments later the man replies again: "I am the world renowned expert on wasp sounds, but I don't recognise this either."

 

"Well, I don't know what's wrong," said the shop assistant, "it's defintely the right LP, let me take a look."

 

He takes the LP off the turntable and looks at it.

 

"Oh, I'm sorry," he said. "I was playing the B side!"

 

 

I know it's bad, that's bird flu for you.

[annie]

[reuby2]

mmmmmmmnnnnn Tatters I try not to eat things with wings (or rather with their wings still on !) as they get stuck in myyyy teeeeeeeeeeeth, so i think you're safe!!!

 

 

Bump, Bang, Kapowee,Bish, Boff, Bash.......

 

...Kersplosh....................(tripped in the pool)

............

.......................

 

 

OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHH where am I?..........................................Who am I?........

Why is there a huge paddling pool in here? who is that winged one in the corner?

 

Who am I....Who am I...does anyone know my name??????????

 

Oh well, i'll just lounge in the pool for a while...something about frogs....

Maybe i'm a frog????? ...............splash splash.

 

Gribmeow, gribimewo, ribeow....No it's no good I don't sound like a frog at all

Maybe I'll book in to see the reech therapist !!!!!

 

 

[Zemanski]

Annie

 

1,000 POSTS

 

 

nemo

Edited November 21, 2005 by Zemanski

[Suze]

Annie you clever sausage you

[DaisyProudfoot]

Now, that's a lot - do you become a demi, demi God for that

 

[annie]

<'> <'>

 

I think it means that I'm a saddo that hasn't got a life outside of this forum .

 

Oh well, could be worse.

 

[Malika]

solving the equation, demi-god = 1/2 god

 

if 500 post make you demi-god

 

1000 post make you...?????

 

500 + 500 = 1000

 

demi-god + demi-god = god

 

are you the winged goddess on an earlier apparance..... <'>

 

CONGRATULATION !!!!

 

ANNIE. <'> <'>

[littlenemo]

I think it means that I'm a saddo that hasn't got a life outside of this forum .

 

Oh well, could be worse.

Indeed it could - real life could be copying the batcave. It has with me.

 

Today I got a new computer and a new hoover - and I didn't know which to play with first.

 

Definitely turning into Cinders.

 

Now that's sad.

[annie]

 

As long as you didn't ask the techno squirrels to help you decide.............oh, you did

 

[nellie]

Well done Annie on reaching your century.

 

Cinders,

 

Get the computer to work the new hoover and your !!

 

Nellie xx

[annie]

<'> Nellie <'>

[annie]

Cinders was devastated by the demise of Vishnu-nu . They had been partners in grime for a long while. Still, today a new hoover was going to be delivered .

 

At last, the door bell rang. Cinders lept off the sofa and answered the door. Signing the delivery slip, Cinders was so excited. He was about to see his new hoover for the first time.

 

Opening the box, Cinders became nervous, "Get a grip of yourself Cinders", he thought to himself. Carefully he unwrapped the hoover, when at last, he could see it in all it's glory .

 

I have to give my new hoover a name, stroking his chin, Cinders thought and thought, "What can I call it". All of a sudden, it came to him. "I know what I'll call you" he said. I will call you..........Vishnu-nu-too

[baddad]

Annie - a farsand posts, eh?

Here's to the next 1000 <'>

Nemo - a new computer??? I'm going to scream and scream until I'm sick!

for once it's not alcohol making me What's that other thing? a hoover you say? A vacuum cleaner? Nope, still not getting it... For housework, you say? Nope - means nowt to me... sucks up dust? what would you want to do that for? it leaves patches, you know...

 

The 'B' side

 

I went in the bakers the other day. i said "can I have a wasp?" The girl said "we don't sell wasps" I said, "well you've got one in the window"...

 

L&P

BD