Someone lend me a punching bag!!

[col]

Got given the reports today and i swear all the staff just stood there looking at me across the field gloating!!

What a shame for them that i have been expecting this and have already planned my attack back!

 

DD7 has learnt that when it is difficult at home for mum she can come in and ask for help at school. She has commented that she prefers to be at school as she enjoys working and gets a lot of praise and she has friends to talk to and play with.

((((((then how come in the mornings she complains of tummy pains, headache and says she doesn't want to go to school!)))))))))

 

DD7 often complains at school that she is hungry. Mornings can be very stressful for Mrs E as all the children demand her attention. Due to the behaviour of the children and the need to get DD8 ready for her taxi, dd7 has said recently that sometimes there is not time for breakfast.

((((What a load of manure, Rachel doesn't get shouted at, to wake up until after DD8 has gone, 90% of the time she does have something even if it's milk or a cereal bar in the car. We don't have time as she takes too long to get dressed, as she tends to forget to get dressed. So often she eats in the car...and she needs nagging to eat))))))

 

She is able to maintain concentration and works hard to achieve what is asked of her, except when she is tired or hungry. Behaviour is generally good except when she is tired; she can be cross and will aggraviate others.((((DUH, She's got ADHD, plus ADHD children have difficulty in sleeping, hence her not wanting to get up in the mornings! and being arguementive when she leaves school))))))))

 

It would benefit DD7 if she had the opportunities during the holidays to attend a holiday club or to play with her friends from school in order to help her maintain her present levels of sppech and the correct form of the spoken word.

 

She is a positive girl who wants to succeed and in school she puts in a great deal of effort. It is a pity that this is not reinforced at home. As a result DD7 has requested her LSA, Mrs W, to carry out this homework in school time. Mrs W had previously discussed with mum that if there was not time to complete homework at home it could be done at school and this is common pratice.((((Because she is too tired, too arguementive, she just can't do it and it doesn't help when the HW hasn't been modified)))))))

 

She takes great pleasure in the simple activites such as walking to the village or the big field, as she says that these are experiences that she does not get very often at home. (((What a lot of fiddlesticks< so we don't go out every day, she goes out at least once at the weekend)))

 

bead threading, but she needs to do more practice of this at home.

 

She recieves a great deal of support at school but still needs full support at home to achieve her potential.

((((((((((((( If we didn't love her she wouldn't have her statement etc!, Our support is that we don't push her when she's tired!!)))))

_________________

[Bagpuss]

Col,

 

<'> <'> <'>

 

Sounds like your up against it What happens now?

 

Hang in there <'>

[aro]

I have never read such an insulting report. It shamelessly tries to blame you for any and all behaviour DD7 displays and clears them of any responsibility! It go so far as to imply neglect!

Good luck with the reply!!!

Anna x

[col]

This was written by the HEAD!!

 

Hubby is coming with me tomorrow and he ready to bang some heads together.

 

I have for about 10 days kept a rough sleep diary on her which i can compaire to a study done on children who have ADHD.

 

I have got a dictaphone full of her temper tantrums over a 3 day period, this tape is full!!

I have even recorded her trying her HW that was not modified!!! It says in her report that she's learning to add up to 20 and yet she gets given HW that asks her to add up to 50!!

 

But it's going to be fun as the head of the new school is going to be there as well as the LEA.

[Bagpuss]

Good luck with it tomorrow Col, please let us know how you get on <'>

[pepper]

awwwwwwww but HOW RUDE!!!!!! the expression ' walk a mile in our shoes' springs to mind. It really REALLY aggrieves me how some ppl dont understand the merest thing.

 

Im sure my sons teachers think similarly guaging from half the comments i've recieved in the past - but they arnt the ones lurching though his memory recall/ short attention span/ and pedantic ways!

 

good luck and do go 'whip some ass!'

[Suze]

oh I can,t believe they have so obviously implied that she has no support at home, no food, no sleep and no leisure activities.........this is awful <'> good luck today and stay strong............this meeting will be minuted won,t it???

[LKS]

col I'm disgusted but not surprised as schools like to paint themselves as totally blameless <'> Good luck for today

[CarerQuie]

Go and kick some serious butt.Who do they think they are.Gggggggrrrrrrrrr.xx

[lisa]

Oh, so that's the problem. Our kids have ASD and ADHD because they haven't had breakfast and we don't take them out enough!!!!

 

Do the doctors know about this miraculous cure for autism??

 

Lisa

[PinkSapphireAngel]

Col I am sitting here feeling absolutely livid on your behalf

Who the heck do these people think they are?

Would not be suprised if our friends in the LEA were somehow involoved in the wording of these reports!

PM me what school it is please, I would be interested to know.

 

You go for them hun, they are clearly prompting your dd and putting words in her mouth as the only proof they have of any of it is "she says"

[Tez]

I'm really sorry that you are being put through this. You really need to make sure that your disagreement with this is put into writing, you don't want anyone to be able to say in the future that because you didn't disagree you accepted what has been said. I'm absolutely livid on your behalf, but I think the implications of this are very serious.

[tabz2711]

Hi Col

 

I am shocked at your report, how come the Head has not involved social services if they think DD7 is been treated this way at home. Looks like they are looking for someone to blame for them not being able to cope.

 

If this is the case and they thought you were not coping well at home maybe they should have invited you in to support you rather than totally going against you and personally attacking you and your family

ahhhhhhh. My blood is boiling for you who do they think they are.

S*

[LittleRae]

 

They're lucky it wasn't me they gave that report to - I'd have wrapped it round their *$<>#~^ necks! My blood is boiling as I read this. I hope your hubby goes in in a right mood and really gives it to the Head.

 

It also sounds as if they have been coaching your daughter in her answers (maybe that's just me). I'd be telling her I wouldn't be letting this go and she'll hear further about her libelous remarks.

 

 

Hope all goes well today <'> <'> <'>

[curra]

How on earth do they "know" all those things? They have just been asking questions to your daughter who is only 7. If they had any evidence they would have contacted SS so it just looks like they are trying to brush off their responisibility for not giving her more support.

Good luck for your meeting!

 

 

Curra <'>

[col]

I'm back and i didn't really get to rip the heads off as much as i liked. Hubby had fun tho. He really laid in to her teacher. They all tried to fob it off. He laid in to the specialist teacher as well and had her gasping for breath. He thinks he went over board, i don't think he did.

 

Didn't really get to play the dictaphone. But was able to say how long it took her to go to sleep which tends to be 1 and a half hours.

 

I t was a good kick up the bum for daddy, so he will be supporting DD7 more.

 

Had them over the homework issue, got the oh she get's modified HW. Told them it was looked at by another parent who disagreed. As DD7 homework was the same as her child.

 

Both of us think now it was the teacher that wrote the report and the head just signed it at the bottom. Need to have a closer look.

 

I noticed the LEA case worker nodding her head as hubby went off in one. About the irelavents bits.

 

What annoyed me is that i asked for the homework to be modified and to be only done at the weekends. Where at the end both the SALT and specialist teacher were asking can you do this at home each day...

 

DD8 who is at a specialist school, her teachers don't ask me to do this or that. The only home work she gets is a bit of drawing, reading book time 2 times a week (compaired to DD7 who has a new book nearly at least 3 times a week.) And the next couple of weeks to learn a song. That is it, that's all the HW DD8 gets and she has overtaken DD7 in maths this year, DD8 has only started to read this year as well and has nearly caught DD7 up.

 

Need a cuppa, and try to think how the meeting went as i have problems retaining it all. Brain is frazzled.

[LittleRae]

Well done, and well done Hubby.

 

Take a minute to relax and then I'd follow it up with a letter to the head, voicing your concerns, and say everything you didn't get to say at the meeting. won't do any harm to have it on record. God knows what the minutes of the meeting will say!

[PinkSapphireAngel]

Well done to you and daddy.

 

I agree def follow it up, make it clear that you do not see the meeting as an end to it, they need to apologise at the very least for their derogatory remarks.

 

Also ask when you will recieve a copy of the minutes of the meeting so they know you keep paperwork.

[pumpkinpie]

I couldnt believe the report! What happened to every child matters and the code of practice.

Everything they wrote was about attributing blame and not trying to work together i the childs best interests.

I would definetley write a letter replying to the report and the meeting today and send it to all parties asap.

 

Well done to you both

[Jill]

That report is totally disgraceful. I'd ask them for their evidence because you are considering suing for libel. Appalling behaviour from a school, I'm just lost for words.

 

Good for you and hubby laying into them in the meeting. I'd have struggled to keep my hands from around their necks.

 

I'm having to be careful how I post this cos I just want to swear, spit and use expletives I am so angry on your behalf.

 

Make sure you get accurate notes from the meeting & chase them up if you aren't happy.

 

I just can't get across how scandalous I think this is!

[PinkSapphireAngel]

It is unbelievable, Col what did the LEA make of it? (Mind you I doubt with their morals they could even see a problem with it grrr)

[Karen A]

Oh, so that's the problem. Our kids have ASD and ADHD because they haven't had breakfast and we don't take them out enough!!!!

 

Do the doctors know about this miraculous cure for autism??

 

Lisa

I am so glad to be provided with this helpful info-- all this time I tried 101 things and all thats needed is a bigger breakfast and a few more stimulating activities [would use the cross face icon but haven't found it] Must go have to go swimming ,park ,adventure playground etc

[smiley]

 

Col - <'> That's disgraceful

 

I agree with Jill - please make sure you get everything in writing, you concerns etc. They cannot be allowed to get away with that .

 

<'>

 

 

That report is totally disgraceful. I'd ask them for their evidence because you are considering suing for libel. Appalling behaviour from a school, I'm just lost for words.

 

Make sure you get accurate notes from the meeting & chase them up if you aren't happy.

 

I just can't get across how scandalous I think this is!

[Daisydot]

Col,

 

thats disgraceful. Who was the LEA officer (PM me when you have calmed down a bit), what did he/she have to say about the report? Its not constructive at all, and it makes me really really angry that schools can get away with this sort of abuse of parents. Did Mrs LEA Officer think it was reasonable to say all this in a report ? If the school think all this is going on then have they filled in a CAF form ? Have they asked you if there is anything they can do to help or support you. If I were you, girl, I would get on the blower to the Parent Partnership. You better let me know what school it was (PM) and I definitely will avoid it like the plague.

 

You have every right to expect the homework to be modified every single time. Its called differentiation and unless work is differentiated I would just hand it back undone with a message that it has not been completed as it was not suitable. Use the time to do some of the SALT programme or something you feel is useful. Having said that, I usually ended up modifying my sons' homework (just made it up as best we could). He was so pleased with himself when he could do something and got a sticker.

 

Thanks for the PMs.

 

Enjoy the cup of tea, and take care

Daisydot

[stressedmumto2]

Just read through that and I'm disguisted at the way the school have written this and the things they have said.

 

I would defo be getting a letter sent to the school, governors and LEA. This stuff should not be on record there is no proof to it, apart from h/work not being completed and I know how hard that one can be. If they have had concerns with her sleep pattern well all of the concerns they have said they should have been reported to you not on her school record.

 

So so livid for you, I would also ask at this time if you could perhaps have a copy of all records the school hason your child, so if ever you need to build up a case there may be something in it.

 

Best of luck to you <'>

[marshmallow]

Col, I'm livid for you Did you have any support/back up in the meeting? Can you make a complaint to the Director of SEN in your LA? Hope you can get it sorted <'> <'>

[col]

DD7 is moving at the end of the term. Will be writing to the LEA, will try and ring them tomorrow. But need to go in to town tomorrow to see a guy about "turn down decision" a blue badge for DD8. The guy used to work for them so if he has any ideas how i can get the decision revoked. Although may leave that for a few hrs as the genetist phoned and left a message yesterday. So have no idea if she telling me that she has or hasn't found anything.

 

Have to find last years reports as well for further ammo when i give parent's views.

 

The new head was there and he was quiet through out the meeting but seemed fine at the end Although when i asked when can i arrange to see him. He mentioned that there is a transition afternoon for the children next week.