trekster

It's to do with the hours and less pressure doing voluntary work.

Well done and congratulations

Congratulations and well done to your son.

I was bullied until in my mid 20s. It is documented now that PTSD can be caused by school bullying. You can have both PTSD and autism as I do. I am pleased you managed to get on with your life and overcome the effect your family had on you. The point I'm making is if your diagnosed late but have a supportive family that's better than being diagnosed late without a supportive family or 1 that blames you for your autism as a few of mine have. If the family and the individual can compensate for the autistics needs then a diagnosis is deemed unnecessary. However many of us really need the diagnosis. I'm just about to start therapy for the mental health problems that have held me back for so long. Also about to get some post diagnostic support. Ally

Hi and welcome. Try googling your county name and autism to see if you have a diagnostic service in your area.

Welcome There is a book "aspergers and alcohol" which you may find supportive. I've friends who struggle with alcohol it's possibly due to an addiction to the gluten and dairy in the alcohol. Pressure in your head could mean you need glasses or your ears are blocked up. Best to check with your gp to be on the safe side.

You could ask for a carers assessment for your mother and partner http://www.autism.org.uk/living-with-autism/benefits-and-community-care/community-care-for-adults/support-for-carers.aspx The new care act means by law you have to be offered a carers assessment, thats how my family got help. We were told i couldnt get any help so my gran ended up at social services begging them before she got a carers assessment and i got home help. i got home help on the grounds my gran could no longer cope with caring for me on top of her own health needs.

" What causes bipolar disorder?The cause of bipolar disorder is not completely clear. It seems that a combination of different things can increase your chances of developing bipolar disorder. Top Genetics (physical)If someone in your immediate family (parents, brother or sister) has bipolar disorder, you are five to ten times more likely to develop bipolar disorder than someone who has no family history. The physical, genetic, cause of bipolar disorder is not clear-cut. Researchers have not found any exact genes that cause bipolar disorder. Different genes have been linked to the development of bipolar disorder. You can find out more about how mental illness runs in families in our ‘Does mental illness run in families?’ section. Top Brain chemicalsIf you have bipolar disorder, you may have uneven levels of particular brain chemicals. Different chemicals affect your mood and behaviour and could make you develop mania or depression. Top Environmental and social factorsLife events can trigger symptoms of bipolar disorder. Stressful or distressing events, such as childhood abuse, can increase your chances of developing depressive episodes. Too much stress can trigger symptoms of bipolar disorder." http://www.rethink.org/diagnosis-treatment/conditions/bipolar-disorder/causes

If you would like to meet asperger/autistic folk before your diagnosis try contacting andrew powell, andrew.powell@nas.org.uk He works at the create centre in bristol (which you can access if you live in bristol) which once a week has activities at the autism centre. They also run an autism diagnostic process. http://www.awp.nhs.uk/services/specialist/autism-spectrum/diagnostic-process/ There are aspies who manage to function without support and ones who struggle without support or even to get a diagnosis. In Bristol there is BASS also in south gloucestershire. They run autism advice services. For other types of support eg community care you still have to prove you fullfill their criterion. If you can describe your needs without a diagnosis in some cases you can qualify for disability benefits. http://www.autism.org.uk/living-with-autism/benefits-and-community-care.aspx

http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Bipolar-disorder/Pages/Causes.asp

This organisation isnt testing for autism it's trying to employ autistics to test computer systems. Diagnosis doesnt always equal support unfortunately. You still have to full-fill their criterion for support or benefits.

Sexuality is very different to gender, there are straight trans folk, bi trans folk and gay trans folk. Thank you for sharing your experiences. If you wished to get help further look up "gender identity clinics" or "gender identity disorder" on NHS choices.

The term late diagnosis really depends on your experience. i have been bullied for my differences up until my diagnosis in my late teens ive managed to make some allowances and some adaptations to help me with my autism but all this has been achieved by hard work and commitment very rarely have local authorities helped me. ive had my gran helping me in the past and now she is too unwell to help anymore so ive only a few relatives left who feel able to advise me on life situations. i only got my home help because my gran pestered social services until they finally listened and we met a social worker who agreed to give me support on the grounds gran needed help. i was then allowed to take my support with me when i moved out. Now ive got to move back to my mums and feels like a step back. im in my mid 30s and still haven't found the stability so i can find paid work or a relationship. My mental health and other disabilities are also getting in the way along with habits ive picked up to 'cope' with my mental health situation. Late diagnosis but no problems at home is a better situation then earlier diagnosis but still being blamed for your disabilities years later.

if i could find voluntary work to help me full time or long term instead of paid work then i would.

If you can teach her better ways of expressing herself, eg instead of "the work was boring" she could write "i didnt enjoy this task". Still saying in a roundabout way that a task is boring.Alternatively she could have a journal to write down how shes feeling and whats shes thinking which can be discussed with an understanding teacher or yourself if you feel able. In the journal she could write "mondays science class found the result of the experiment boring" Unfortunately as she gets older people who dont understand autism are likely to take offence, in the past my objections to particular tasks in class have been dismissed in quite hurtful ways. They thought that i thought i was better than them (i dont) because i was questioning the tasks as i didnt see the point in completing them. Even worse the longer you are diagnosed the more people expect you to 'know better', what they dont understand is the amount of sustained mental effort it takes and telling an autistic to 'just try harder' is counter-productive and eventually leads to really ill mental health It's a fine line and a balancing act but identifying her needs and finding the support you both need early on is likely to prevent problems like what ive described above from happening in the future.

If her comments can appear upsetting, rude or blunt to others then i would say it could be an ASD trait. The teacher might consider her comments 'cheeky' or 'backchat'. My nursery school teacher considered me an unusual character but she liked unusual characters.

Transgender is when you are born with female body parts or male body parts but feel your gender doesn't match those body parts 100% of the time. So someone can feel they have no gender or a mixture of genders (both known as non binary or genderqueer) of the opposite gender to what their body parts tell them, male to female (for those born with male body parts) or female to male (for those born with female body parts). This causes mental distress to the affected person. Male to female transgender folk would prefer to do what they considered female or neutral activities. Driving for example would not cause distress with their gender (unless they were labelled something involving their incorrect gender "stupid women driver" or "typical boy racer" for example) as it's considered a gender neutral activity. Wearing make up, dresses, skirts, painting fingernails, going on hen parties, going to female only clubs, could be possible activities for male to female transgender folk. Female to male transgender folk would prefer to do what they considered male or neutral activities. Playing football, boxing, going on stag do's, going to male only clubs could be possible activities for female to male transgender folk. There are transgender folk who dont really engage in typical male or typical female activities. But they have distress in other aspects of their lives, some trangender folk can manage with a name change and dressing permanently in their true gender. But others need hormones and surgery in order to feel 'comfortable in their own skin'. Even having a wee can set off distress in transgender folk. Ally

There's normal behaviour for a person but that doesn't mean a person is normal or abnormal. Part of my work in helping other autistics is promoting tolerance and acceptance. I think these folk are trying to reclaim words as their own. A bit like me calling myself a cripple. I would only call someone else a cripple with their permission.

As a sexuality thread was offered it was only fair to offer a trans thread as well because the t is often missed out in lgbt discussions.

Anytime does it make sense what ive said? If you would like to PM me regarding your mental health stuff we can share what works and hopefully help each other.

How does this sound? "I have difficulties with my short term memory, to help with this I prefer things to stay the same. If something changes suddenly my brain cannot process the change which caused anxiety and more problems with my short term memory. A glass can only be filled so high before the water comes out of the top. My stress levels can only become so high before i become overloaded causing distress. I am scared something bad is going to happen when things change and I prefer change to be negotiated and written down so i can process it better. As a result of my autism i can only cope with 1 change every (put in minutes or hours here) before my anxiety from the stress of changes adversely affects my mental health."

(Posted on behalf of beckie121) Hi! I'm looking for parents/caregivers to fill in a quick questionnaire who have a child who is on the autistic spectrum as part of my Masters Research at Cardiff Univerisity. The research is interested in understanding the experiences of parents and caregivers who speak more than one language, or where their child is exposed to more than one language (e.g. school, family etc.). This research will primarily investigate the advice given to parents and the choices made when dealing with a diagnosis of autism. Participation is completely voluntary and anonymous. By deciding to take part you would be contributing to research investigating and evaluating the quality and uniformity of advice being given to parents about autism and language use. Volunteers would be asked to complete a short questionnaire that will be posted to you, and can be returned in a pre-paid envelope to Cardiff University Please contact ThomasR111@cf.ac.uk if you're interested in helping out, or reply on here. Thanks! Rebecca

Diagnosis depends on the area you live in. You could try looking up the autism strategy for adults in your county and see how to get a diagnosis from there.

Why does your CBT worker deny you could have aspergers? Would showing them a list of symptoms often displayed in autistic females help? Some specialists have (ironically) quite black and white ideas of what aspergers is and isn't. For me people not believing what im saying to them causes me distress but that's more related to my traumatic childhood than my pre aspergers situation. If you would like to meet other spectrum folk both diagnosed and not I highly recommend autscape the autism retreat (see the general discussion forum for more details). Theres even a womens group discussion if you would like to meet other Asperger females.

Welcome to the forum. I knew I was aspire about 2 years before I was diagnosed but as a teenager was too scared to do anything about it.