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Everything posted by trekster

  1. http://www.autscape.org/2022/registration/ http://www.autscape.org/2022/programme/ I highly recommend this autistic conference. I have been before and registration is now open until early July. Day tickets will be on sale soon (where you leave just before dinner) Presentations, interaction badges to show whether you would like others to interact with you or not, sensory room, discussion groups, entertainment evening, full board residential which is catered towards autistic sensory needs. Connecting bus avaliable from Alfreton train station on request for a small extra charge. If you are there I'm the guy with the manual wheelchair and playmobil characters feel free to wave at me on white or green badge.
  2. Sorry your post was missed. Welcome to the forum. Two books I highly recommend you try are... "People with autism behaving badly" by John Clements "Asperger syndrome and difficult moments, practical solutions for tantrum, rage and meltdown" On a personal note, my mum and I tend to be more prone to meltdown if we've had a poor night's sleep, if more changes than we can handle happen at once (unless we've made them ourselves with no consequences from others), as a way of expression physical or emotional pain, as a result of perfectionism "either everything goes 100% right or it all goes wrong", angry depression (I wish I had the hopeless crying depression but I don't). Hope these help Alfie
  3. Hi I notice your username indicates you're in Bristol? There are a few organisations there that accept self diagnosed adults. One is DiverseUK which run a range of meet up groups in Bristol. The other I'd based in Bath, Bath Autism and Neurodiversity spectrums cic. Feel free to private message me for more details.
  4. Perfectionism in autism can look like symptoms of an eating disorder (or as an updated term is used, 'disordered eating'). Unfortunately the only researcher I've come across that's studied disordered eating in autistics wasn't very open to questions or feedback on her research from autistics. In fact a couple of people (myself included) walked out of her talk in disgrace as she was so dismissive. You might want to look up "selective eating in autism" as that concentrates on textures etc in foods. But when it becomes a problem, would be when your health is adversely affected by what you're eating (and/or not eating). Only a medical professional can tell you that for sure. But there are also helplines for disordered eating if you are concerned. https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/get-information-and-support/get-help-for-myself/i-need-support-now/helplines/
  5. Depends on the diagnosis, who made it and when. Sometimes you can have an updated assessment which can then allow you to add a note to your file stating why this information is inaccurate.
  6. To add to this, any unauthorised research posted on the forum will be deleted without warning. You must have your project approved by moderators and show ethical approval to a moderator beforehand, no exceptions.
  7. If you take yourself and or your disabled adult/child to none gp medical appointments (including community dental appointments), then you can claim travel refunds via filling in and sending off (I'd do it 2 months before as it takes a while to get to the correct department) a HC5(t) form. https://www.nhsbsa.nhs.uk/nhs-low-income-scheme
  8. Your feelings regarding your experiences with your ex wife are totally understandable. I had to leave my last place because of gaslighting myself. I haven't been dating recently myself so am unable to give much advice. Be guided on what your new partner says. Ask your partner what their mother likes to talk about. Then pick 2 or 3 of her hobbies that you both have in common and go from there. My mother likes to talk about serial dramas, my latest embroidery pieces, what I've been doing that week. So I stick to those subjects. I'm currently working on starts and ends to conversations. I'm particularly hard at ending conversations.
  9. There are a few aspie dating sites out there, my mum met her fella in her 60s. They've been together for over a year now and she's suspected ASD. I know the feeling regarding ASD ruining it for you. Are there any autism support groups near you? Some organisations are running online support groups. Others eg national autistic society have resource and day centres open to a limited number of people.
  10. trekster

    New member

    Are there any computer clubs, tech groups via meetup.com or similar that could help you find friends.
  11. I know of people who find Discord easier to use than Facebook, servers are divided into various channels to post about relevant subjects.
  12. Only that ive read and found in the research about autism and adhd."Multicoloured mayhem" by Jacqui Jackson is one book that springs to mind.
  13. If you have access to Facebook then this organisation might be able to help you. https://www.facebook.com/ICANinCornwall/ Meetings where services offered to adults with autism are discussed are held here. https://www.supportincornwall.org.uk/kb5/cornwall/directory/service.page?id=hhZ34N-n3FY&adultchannel=10-2 Welcome and sorry you haven't had anyone respond to your post until now. What support you can get depends on a number of factors. im in my early 40s and set up peer support groups in some neighbouring counties due to lack of services in our area. At one point we had 3 organisations running groups for adults with autism in 1 area, but now that's reduced to 1 due to covid which is another limiting factor even though Cornwall will be in tier 1 (at least for the first 2 weeks). It does sound like your GP doesn't understand you, ive had a few that dont understand me in the past so can empathise with your situation. https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/diagnosis/post-diagnosis-support/autistic-adults Unfortunately the NAS website has changed quite a bit so getting harder to find services and information on there, but the above link is a starting point for you.
  14. He may not be able to remember what he has done if it was done in an autistic meltdown which is why he's appearing to lie. He has this time come to you about the broken glass which can be encouraged. The cause of why he's throwing things or breaking stuff needs to be found and removed. Thank him for coming to you about the broken glass. Has anything in particular set this off with going into his room to escape from the world? I do agree with getting a counseller would be the best way forward especially one thats trained in helping families that have autistics that display challenging behaviour.
  15. Hi and welcome, feel free to start your own post if you like and hopefully we can help you make sense of yourself and others. no need to apologise to us for talking a lot. I can be the same, but then again im also dyslexic so summarising what i need to say is difficult for me.
  16. Really happy to hear and hope he is doing well in his new place. I've been in my current flat for 3 years, before that i lasted 10 years.
  17. https://autismawarenesscentre.com/what-is-interoception-and-how-does-it-impact-autism/ "INTEROCEPTION: THE EIGHTH SENSORY SYSTEM by Kelley Mahler Sit back and close your eyes. What do you feel inside your body? Is your heart beating fast or slow? Are you breathing deeply or shallowly? Do you have to go to the bathroom? Are your muscles tense or loose? How does your stomach feel? Most of us are able to feel all of these sensations with the help of our little-known, but very important, eighth sensory system, Interoception. "
  18. Sorry no one has responded to your post until now so hoping i can help. Welcome to the asd forum. Sometimes cases of autism can be easily spotted other times cases can be missed eg if people can mask so appear to function in the world (in some cases socially). No friends in school and being a loner (sometimes by choice) can be a sign of autism. By issues with routines are there some things he has to do a particular way over and over again? If you tried to teach him a new routine that he didn't know (or change a routine he knows very well) would this upset him? I can mask (to an extent) so can appear to understand others feelings and pick up on social cues but it comes at a cost, I need quite a bit of alone time in order to process what's going on. Being hyper aware of others is another sign of autism. He might be concentrating so intensely on whats going on that starting a conversation is difficult for him. Knowing how and when to start a conversation can be difficult for autistics. He might be so self conscious of not interrupting that starting a conversation with kids his own age becomes too much for him. Conversations involve a lot of quick decisions on what to say, when to say it, how to say it, what not to say, how to start talking, how to stop talking, how long to talk before stopping to give others a chance to speak. He might find people too confusing to speak to or it could be anxiety that's preventing him from talking. https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/selective-mutism/ but you can have selective mutism and autism. Autistic children can struggle to make and maintain friendships. Are there any kids in his class who have similar hobbies and interests that his teacher could buddy up with him or introduce him to them? Maybe there's kids in his class who are poor at something he's good at? Could he perhaps help the other kids with their drawing? (you mentioned he was creative or the other creative activities he can do) Then they could ask him specific questions about drawing to get him talking about something? i liked maths so brought some maths books to school and shared them with other kids. i also shared apples from grans garden but was unaware that some may have maggots in them at the time of sharing causing embarrassment when the kids found out. i was 10 at the time and had no diagnosis at school. i also used to just walk around the yard at school playtimes. i was severely depressed from age 8 but was unable to express this in ways others noticed. It was the 1980s and childhood depression was less well known about then. i still have bouts of depression but at least i know why and have some strategies that can help. The term 'high functioning autism' is quite misleading, i could go to school, write in my book, read, but playtimes i either walked around the yard or put a coat over my head sat on the floor in the playground. i lasted as long as i could in the dinner hall, (unless the dinner lady banged a spoon on the table telling us it was too loud) because i didn't want to go out and play, dinner times were predictable, playtimes were busy, sensory stimulating in a bad way, overloading and too much. There are different presentations of autism, some kids are too chatty, even with strangers like me, others are more like your son, then there's kids out there like neither of us. i didn't know what i had at the time of school, due to delays in support and diagnosis, i have only become more settled in myself in my early 40s, my diagnosis was in my late teens. There is a lot of overlap between my diagnoses and disabilities, i have fibromyalgia a physical health problem, but that causes concentration issues but so does autism. i have elhers danlos another physical health problem, but that caused my physical developmental delays as did my autism, i have dyslexia so my reading is slower the right way up than with inverted text (very annoying when quiz answers are written inverted). Secondary anxiety and depression can accompany 65% of autistic kids (NAS, You need to know campaign).
  19. ESA is changing in some areas to Universal Credit, but I haven't heard that PIP is going to be changing. Where did you hear that PIP is going to be changing?
  20. Thank you for letting us know. I only met him once and didn't really speak to him.
  21. This is an excellent way of describing the situation. Yeah with gender being an abstract concept and autism causing difficulties in understanding abstract concepts it makes sense with what you've said.
  22. Thank you for the update much appreciated I hope your children continue to progress. Really pleased that your child got the diagnosis needed. In some places it's more like 3 years. Many trans patients have some combination of autism (or adhd), eds, (c)ptsd. Thank you for fighting for your kids. Unfortunately in adult assessments those who can mask their symptoms are 'falling through the net' and missing out on a diagnosis.
  23. As long as it's done with masks and precautions then I don't see a problem with it.
  24. This is very black and white, the research doesn't allow for individuals who mask or who have a different gender identity to their sexual defined at birth.
  25. I'm a fan of this show. I also like to watch "the good doctor". Alfie
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