Faithnomore

My Oldest is also 13 AS/ADHD and getting him to do anything bathroom related is an absoloute nightmare. There is no way he would let me in the bathroom to check what he is doing - I know it isn't what he is supposed to do. If he wasn't told to wash/shower he wouldn't do it at all and he really doesn't care about the consequences of not washing. TBH I really can't see this ever changing. For my DS it's not that he can't, but that he doesn't want to.

My dad is only 5ft 6,and my FIL is also around this height neither of them have any problems regarding their height.

He sounds exactly like DS1. He was DX with ADHD aged 7 but not with ASD until he was 11. I kept telling CAHMS they were missing something but they insisted it was just part of his ADHD. I ended up writing all the 'odd' behaviours down and reading it out to the consulant, finally the light went on and 4 weeks later he got his ASD dx.

No. DS1 (AS/ADHD) took to B/F really well and also took bottles really well, with no confusion or refusal. He was a pig from day 1 and fed every 2-3 hrs. I quit B/F when he was 6 mths as he kept biting me which was fine when he had no teeth(but still hurt), but not with a tooth and he didn't learn from my responses that I didn't like it (DD did, she only bit me once). Our Problems came when trying to ween him onto lumpy solids and finger foods!! DD B/F really well and so did DS2, but he did find it very difficult to latch on for the 1st 3 weeks or so (still unsure as to whether he has ASD). Both DD and DS2 refused bottles until they were completely weened from B/F.

My oldest DS has a dual DX of ADHD and ASD, DD is NT but I'm not sure that my youngest DS is. He presents with a fair few AS traits but is nowhere near the nightmare his older brother is, maybe because the oldest also has ADHD. I'm unsure at this stage whether to have him assessed. ASD definately runs in my side of the family there are a fair few Aspies DX and not DX.

My AS son has different pain thresholds. If he injures himself he makes very little fuss, he's broken both his wrists - his left one twice and numerous other injuries that would have most screaming in pain. I find this makes it hard to tell just how badly he has hurt himself. On the flip side he goes scatty over injections and DH and I had to pin him down to remove some poison from a foot injury. He also has sensory issues with his head, even washing his hair had him screaming the house down.

We're moving to the Isle of wight when we sell our house. My oldest son is 12 and has AS, so if there's anyone with any experience or advice about AS children and the high schools on the island I will be very interested to read about them. I'd like to find out as much as poss if I can. Very quick reminder with Mod hat on.Please pm rather than posting if including details of specific schools etc. Thanks Karen.

Forget Oxfordshire too. DS1 has now been out of school for a year, we have been offered a school place but we are not entitled to transport. Without transport he cannot go back to school, there are no schools within walking distance and he has to be supervised which ever method of transport is used.Of course I am expected to supervise him, impossible task when I have 2 kids in primary school and I can't drive. Lea have said they will only provide transport if he has a statement, they will not statement because he is not at school and now they are giving schools extra funding so they can avoid statementing!! We are also planning to move to a part of oxfordshire where the schools are within walking distance of our home. I am at rock bottom with our Lea now Forgot to mention we have a fab autism outreach service who I feel also despair of the LEA.

OASIS and Autism Family Support. OASIS is Oxfordshire Autistic Society for Information and Support and costs �12 a year to join, but worth it as they organise playdays in the school holidays and are a valuable source of help and info. Autism Family Support are based at Thomley Hall in Worminghall(bucks), they have groups for AS/HFA teenagers. Can't advise on schools as my experience so far is not good, DS1 has been out of school for a year now - but this is only in Oxford itself not the county as a whole.

Hi, just like to get some thoughts on problems we're having with DS2. DS1 has AS and we've been through/going through hell with his schooling. Now DS2's school report has flagged some similarities with DS1, disruptive when bored, refusing to do work that he deems to hard, working better in 1-2-1 or small group situations, lack of concentration, unable to sit still for long, easily frustrated. He has problems with reading, writing and spelling and retaining information, I think he may also have some fine motor skill problems. His behaviour in general is fine and he has no problems at playtimes (unlike DS1). At home in general he is fine although he does have a very bad chewing problem, he chews just about everything he can. His toys don't last 5 mins, he chewed the sky remotes, my nice oak tables, the futon, his bed, my cushion covers, his clothes and his nails, just to name a few things - he actually bit one of his toe nails off! He's also a very messy eater and would rather use his fingers than cutlery, he goes to school with breakfast down him every day. He has never really liked wearing clothes either, on a non school day getting dressed involves just a pair of trousers. School are assessing him for dyslexia, but I'm not sure whether to be concerned about him in general. He's almost 7 and compared to DS1 he is much easier to deal with. Is it worth getting him assessed or could all of this be down to dyslexia? Any thoughts would be appreciated.

DS1 is also a great collector of red elastic bands - he has even asked posties for them, I've also been through 2 washing machines thanks to elastic bands! DS1 will pretty much collect everything also, Pokemon cards and soft toys(even at the age of 12 he still has them lined up around the top of his bed), digimon figures, beyblades, bionicles, stones, anything shiny or remotely gem like, rusty bolts and screws, small cardboard boxes, dust caps from bike and car tyres and currently yu-gi-oh magazines. DS2 seems to starting the stone thing now!!

AJ's DLA was awarded until he 16, but like you I haven't updated it since his ASD dx in Jan. All of the difficulties documented in his DLA claim are because of his ASD and not ADHD(his original dx), so the only thing that's changed is his dx. I am reluctant to update incase they want me to fill the forms in again, despite his DLA having another 4 years to run. I think I may have to look into it and keep an eye on this thread.

AJ's mentor asked him the other day what he thought he was good at. One of the things he said was being a friend, and he is provided he always gets what he wants when he wants and how he wants.

No advice but we are currently having simillar issues. I withdrew DS1 from Secondary school as the treated him badly. He will be going back to school in sept (different school) and transport is a huge issue. He was kicked off the school bus provided for his last secondary, other kids wound him up and he reacted e.t.c. Without an escort this WILL happen again, I can't drive and I also have younger kids I have to take to school. Public transport is out as he has no stranger awareness and is easily distracted, plus it's 2 buses through town in rush hour!! Lucky if he would get there before 10, it's only 10 mins up the bypass by car!! The education officer is looking into it at the mo, but they are expecting him to be able to use school transport independently in the near future - yeah right a 12 yr old that behaves like a 5 yr old they've got a long wait. It's beyond me why school transport does not have adult escorts on them at all, a bus bus full of rowdy kids must be very distracting for the bus driver it should be a Health and safety issue. My dad was in the R.A.F we always had 2 adult escorts on our school buses.

Sounds like a school morning in my house, my kids always have me at breaking point by 8:35 am and I have exactly the problem at bed time. I don't cope and spend alot of my days feeling wound up and ready to blow again, not to mention the almost permanent tension headaches! I'm looking forward to when DS1 goes back to school in Sept(been out since oct '06), then I can go and destress on my allotment all on my own - taking DS1 with me only adds to my stress levels.

DD 9yrs and DS almost 7 yrs, definately alot of copycat behaviour as our ASD DS is 12. They are at their worst when they are all together, particularly at bed time. Things are a whole lot easier when DS1 is taken out of the mix but that's a rare occurance, the in laws took him to spain for a week last year and DD and DS2 were bordering on angelic behaviour wise then all hell broke loose when he came back!

Dummie from MSE? I've followed your thread on there, nice to see you on here(nikki on mse). AJ was 11 when he finally got his diagnosis of mild autism. We knew by the age of 2 something wasn't right, and with hindsight it was evident from birth. He was dx with ADHD aged 7 but I knew they were still missing something and that wasn't the full picture. Another 4 years of trying to tell this to CAHMS and finally we got there.

I can understand why. I'm constantly at my wits end with 1 autistic child and 2 NT children, 6 and I would have totally lost it. If I'd have known that AJ was autistic as a toddler and what lay ahead of us , I doubt very much that I'd have gone on to have any more kids.

Yep same here. AJ is always complaining he's too hot, he also hated being swaddled as a baby. He will not wear a coat under any circumstance, when we had the snow earlier in the year he spent nearly all day outside in just a jumper, jeans and trainers - he was soaked when he came in!!

Who are they trying to kid, he will continue to do this unless he's taught other wise. As to how they teach him I don't know this is the kind of thing we are currently trying to get help for with AJ. They certainly need to do something they can't ignore the behaviour 'because he can't help it' and then reprimand Jay for a reacting in a way he can't help, it makes no sense.

There's a possibilty AJ could be sent to an ASD unit and as that's the closest one to us . I am not one to sit back and let things happen either, they'll love me too! As the mother of a child very like the one you describe, I can fully understand Jay's upset. AJ drives my NT children(and us)insane with this kind of behaviour. For AJ it is a form of (inappropriate) social interraction, it's one of the limited ways he knows how to get someone to interract with him and of course he doesn't care if the other child doesn't like it! The staff at the unit should be aware of the other boy's behaviour and should be keeping a close eye on him(I would expect them to do this in AJ's case), and when he starts on other kids he needs to be removed as it's not fair on the kids he's annoying or scaring. It's not Jays fault this child keeps approaching him, and the unit cannot expect him to not enter a room just because he's in there. They should be dealing with the other child plain and simple. This unit sounds just like AJ's 1st primary school, they were always turning a situation round and making it AJ's fault. I would take the issue higher as no one seems to be listening to you in that unit .

Bit late to this thread but this is an enormous problem for us. DS1 is almost 12 and I see no end in sight to his excessive possesiveness of anything that happens to come into his possesion, even when he outgrows his clothes he will not give them up!! We recently had a skip in the garden and he kept taking stuff back out(stuff that wasn't his) and having temper tantrums when told to put them back. He has major tantrums over the attempted removal of anything he sees as his, even bits of paper or stones, he has quite a thing for shoe boxes. I have often told him he will end up like Mr Trebus, he reckons he won't!!

A can lie but he's as see through as a sheet of glass, so never gets away with it. He also has this odd thing where he will do something and swear blind that he didn't(even if he's been seen by me or another adult) and he will get into a temper tantrum over it because no one believes him!!

Yes to both. He was bullied and because of the way he reacts he always got into trouble. He never noticed though, he even said to me the other day he was never bullied at school!! When he got to senior school the kids were even worse and picked up on his triggers very quickly.

I spent years trying to convince psych's there was something different about DS1, even when he was dx with ADHD I knew that wasn't the whole story. I'd previously dismissed ASD myself because he wasn't aloof or socially withdrawn. However his all consuming obssessions made me look into ASD again recently and this time I realised that he fit the criteria for ASD. So this time I wrote down all the things that were different about him and took it with me to our next appt. Bingo! He was identified as ASD. A month later his official dx was mild autism, I was surprised as I expected an AS dx. The psych's reasoning for his dx was that he had all the traits of autism but he had no speach delay??!! I asked about his maturity as he's 11 but is more like a 5 yr old, she said he will mature just at a much slower rate. From what I can gather this lack of maturity is normal for ASD kids.