Tally

You could present the CASBAT report as evidence for the DLA application, also any other written communication you have between yourself and the school such as a home-school diary or the letters about the bullying, anything mentioning his inability to report bullying could help. Another thing that can help is keeping a diary yourself about everyday difficulties, including all the extra care you're providing and also anything he tells you about school.

I hope Will does make it to London. I like LancsLad's idea Of the list of reasons it will be good. Just the process of writing it might get him into the right frame of mind and it could be a good reminder next time he starts to get angsty.

I also got referred to a counsellor when I had bad gut problems to help me come to terms with the symptoms. It was almost a year after that I was eventually prescribed drugs to actually manage the symptoms! The latter method was the more helpful one, both physically AND psychologically.

I would say that a best friend is simply your closest friendship. Little girls like to define their best friend, second best friend, third best friend, etc, but it's not really necessary to do this. People normally have a small group of good friends, they don't always have one specific best friend.

Such a shame that happened after such a good day. If it's a particular issue that comes up a lot, maybe he could carry some wet wipes in his bag so he could wipe his hands in the cubicle.

Yes, I have the same problem. It doesn't help that I have had mental health problems in the past which are not yet 100% resolved. I was ill for 7 years before anyone acknowledged it was separate from mydepression. I still don't believe I've been correctly diagnosed as I have symptoms this diagnosis does not explain, but at least it's finally been acknowkedged that something other than depression is going on. Having faced a recent bereavement, all my physical symptoms are getting blamed on that now. I do feel it's an excuse not to help, but at least I've made a little progress with it over the past couple of years. I wish I knew the answer for you, but sadly I don't. I just got lucky with a osychiatrist once who realised something separate was going on and made sure my GP knew about it.

Helli, and welcome. I don't know of any women's Asperger forums, but there are some women with Asperger's here.

I can't think of many things worse, but clearly you won't agree with me on that! When is it? I hope you enjoy it.

The two Smiley's are the same person. I don't believe Smiley has ever tried to fool people about this, I think she assumed we'd all realise she is the same person. She has stopped using the previous account, and has never used them both simultaneously. The reason it gets frustrating is because she keeps asking for advice, receives the advice to talk to her doctor, and then ignores it. There doesn't seem a lot of point giving it if she's not going to listen to it. Without help, Smiley is going to feel the way she describes above forever. I'm sure that people would be keen to support Smiley through seeking treatment and getting better. What we can't do is support her indefinitely. If saying, "you don't look fat to me" could cure Smiley's problem, she would be cured by now. But she isn't, she still believes she is fat and ugly, which is why she really needs professional input on this. Preferably before she develops physical health problems or even dies. But no one can force her to do that, and it gets frustrating and it isn't fair to do that to people here.

JRL, there are very very few mental health professionals who specialise in treating people with ASD. If going private is an option for you, then you might stand more chance of finding one. I've found with counsellors/therapists that it's more important to get one who "clicks" with you than their experience, training or technique. CBT can work well for people with ASD because it doesn't involve talking in-depth about your feelings, which we tend to find difficult to verbalise. There is an element of discussing feelings, but it is possible to benefit from it without doing this in great depth. As well as feelings, it looks at automatic thoughts (these are different to feelings like anxiety and are more statements like, "if I go there, this scary thing might happen") and behaviour (such as avoiding anxiety-making situations). It is possible to improve your feelings by focussing on these things. The best thing to do is make sure your counsellor is aware of your AS from the beginning. If you can, explain how it affects your ability to discuss feelings. One therapist I had, who I had a lot of success with, told me that most people with depression and anxiety also have difficulty verbalising their feelings, so my difficulty was not unusual for her and she was able to adapt things accordingly. Difficult events in life can lead to all sorts of difficult feelings. CBT might not be the best approach if recent events are the cause for the difficulties you're having at the moment. You might need more to just talk through things and be guided a little to find your way through. A good counsellor/therapist should be able to work out the difference between a normal, healthy reaction, and one that has become a mental health issue, and support you the right way. What you might need is someone to talk through everything that's happened, including your recent diagnosis, and help you get your thoughts clear and start planning for the future.

Smiley has been going on and on about this for as long as I can remember. She desperately needs APPROPRIATE help and attention from a doctor, but she point blank refuses to seek the APPROPRIATE attention and continues to attempt to use the forum as her sole source of support with her psycholOgical health issues. She pays no attention to anyone who advises her to see s doctor about this medical issue, and my sdvice to anyone would be that Smiley is not worth wasting your time on as she doesn't listen to a word anyone says.

It's important to remember that your friends' other friendships and activities do not take away anything from your friendship with them. Your friendship is what it is and if that means you do some stuff with them and not other stuff, it doesn't change or invalidate the friendship you do have. Quality not quantity can apply to this to - it's not about quantity of time you spend with your friends, it's about the quality of that time and enjoying your time together.

Dry as in cracked/sore, or not wet? Running dry (cracked/sore)hands under the tap is going to make them worse in the long run, although it will relief soreness for a moment. It's an odd one, it sounds like he's using the cream to make his hands feel wet. Soreness may well be a result of the problem, rather than a symptom of it.

Paracetamol and ibuprofen would normally bring a temperature down, so that's an odd reaction. I think you need to go back to your GP on Monday morning for advice on this. In the mean time, I find anadin extra good for a bad headache. It might not makd you feel totallt better, but it should help a bit.

It wasn't like I expected and it revealed to me how little I actually know about severe autism. It's probably inevitable that Louis would have been nervous at the beginning to meet children who can be violent, for example, the boy who lived in residential care because he burnt down the house aged 8 and attacked his mother. He just seemed to continually eat and the mother made no attempt to stop him, but given his history maybe she was scared of him. But it was interesting to see Louis bond with the children he met and become less anxious around them. I thought the mother who lay on her son was odd. He didn't seem that out of control and it did look as though sitting on him only upset him more. The "break over" bit did seem abrupt, and also there was a loud alarm which might have been what upset him. It just looked like he was tantrumming at not getting his way. I don't know if there was more to it all than was shown Nicky seemed quite judgemental about other people, which I think would cause him serious problems socially. He seemed to come from a large family, so it wasn't like he wasn't mixing with others. It was sad that he kept making the violent threats, as he did not seem like a violent person at all. They did show his mum explaining that he can't talk like that, but I felt someone needed to be much harsher with him and explain that saying things like that is illegal and could get him into a lot of trouble. I was impressed with the school, especially the shopping mall where the students can practice daily living skills and workplace skills.

Having seen the write-up of this programme, I'm not sure whether I'm going to like it or not. But I'm going to watch it anyway. It is a two-parter, but the second part is not about autism, it is about dementia.

So pleased it went smoothly. I'm sorry it's come to this but I hope he will get the help he needs now.

I'm very sorry this has happened. Nans are very special people. You have many other people in your life who have experienced the lOss of the same person, so you are not alone in your loss, but some of your feelings may well be different from the others because everyone's different. Although you will have a lot of things to organise and people to visit, do try to ensure you get some time alone to think things through. Most people with AS process their thoughts more slowly, and process them better when not distracted, so time alone to think, cry, talk to your nan, whatever you want, is important.

I've just had an email saying I am elegibe for DSA and I have to arrange a Study Needs Assessment. It's given me a link to find a local centre. Is there any difference from centre to centre, or are they all the same? Ideally I'll just go to the nearest one (which isnt particularly near anyway), but I just wanted to check whether I should do some research into this a bit more.

I scored 18, but I guessed most of them, didn't even have a "gut feeling" on them. Most of them I thought showed no emotion but the answers listed quite strong emotions such as "aghast" or "terrified." For those ones I just picked the one that was the mildest emotion like "relaxed" or "friendly," but for some of them there wasn't a very mild option so that's where I totally guessed. But there were 3 where I was sure what the emotion was before even looking at the options there, and there was a suitable one there, and I got all of those right. It's an odd test because we don't normally see faces like that. Normally we can see the whole face, the body language, hear their voice and know what they are reacting to, so we have a lot more clues in everyday life.

By the way, Smiley is talking about herself, and is failing to mention that she is excessively obsessed with how little she eats and how much she exercises. Someone who faints in the gym is doing something very wrong and needs to discuss their diet and exercise regime with a DOCTOR, and not seek affirmation from people on the internet who have no medical qualifications and are not armed with all the facts.

I used to go and stay with the lady across the road one night a week from under the age of 1 year. That was a bit different though because I wasn't staying with another child. I used to sleep over with a school friend from aged 5. When I was 12 I flew as an unaccompanied minor to Belgium and stayed with my grandparents for a week - I didn't know them well and often didn't see them from one year to the next because of the distance. My cousin was 6 when she first stayed at mine for 2 nights. But she and her older sisters frequently stay over at their grandma's house and with their nextdoor neighbours so she is well used to staying away from home. This was her first time without her sisters though. I don't think 9 is too young at all. Sam's stayed away before, you know the mum well and she is familiar with ASD and with your son in partticular. I'm sure the mum would phone you if there was a problem, though it sounds like he'll be just fine I used to have sleepovers with my friends a lot when I was a teenager and it would be great for Sam to be able to enjoy things like this.

Remember that your body isn't used to going to sleep at 10pm. Don't be disheartened if it doesn't work straight away. Keep getting up at the same time, even if you feel like total poo, and evdntually you will settle into a routine. Sleeping pills can help get your body into a routine if nothing else works. You still have to find the appropriate routine for yourself so the work you're doing now is essential. But if you do get really stuck with it then a short term course might help you establish the routine, and occasional use might help you stay in it.

I used to work nights as well. If this is the routine your body likes then that might be an option worth considering. But if you want to adapt to a more normal routine, then it's much easier to force yourself to stay awake than to make yourself sleep. Be interesting to know whether it's worked for you today/tonight. But in the long term, it's no good for your health or productivity to be constantly tired. Bizarrely, it can also be difficult to sleep if you are overtired. So it can work as a quick fix, but not as a long term strategy. I've found that major triggers for sleep/wake routine are daylight and mealtimes. Sleeping with the curtains open can wake you when it gets light. In wintertime a daylight bulb can wake you in the mornings when it's still dark. You don't have to spend a fortune on those special alarm clocks, I use a £7 daylite bulb from a craft shop in a standard desk lamp and use a timer switch to make it come on at the right time. Getting as much daylight as possible when you want to stay awake can help. So spend some time outside or at least sit near the window. Eat breakfast in the mornings, and your evening meal actually in the evening. A carb-heavy evening meal can prepare you for sleep, whereas it's not so good for breakfast as you don't want to get dozy just after breakfast! A relaxing bedtime routine will be different for everyone, but generally it works best to avoid exercise, computer, TV, eating or drinking too close to bedtime. Your body temperature drops when you fall asleep, which is why you need to be adequately covered. A hot bath can be relaxing and help you wind down your thoughts ready for sleep, but the drop in temperature when you get out can also lead to natural sleep - a shower isn't as relaxing, but can help with temperature. Avoid caffiene in the afternoons. There's a lot of advice on sleep routines out there on the internet. If you google "sleep hygiene" you will find loads of tips.

Can you sprinkle some fox wee about? Might make a fox think a bigger fox has already adopted this as his territory and go elsewhere. But the temptation may be too strong. Much as I love foxes, I can see why not everyone feels this way.