Jill

OMG! Blessya! Pulling streaks through takes FOREVER. Oh wait, you know that now............. My hubby does my hair for me (just a straight colour tho, not streaks) he doesn't do a bad job for a plumber! Hope all's well that ends well & that your hair looks good after all that.

I think making a friend is not a little thing, it's a HUGE thing, especially for our little chaps. Brilliant Brilliant Brilliant Brilliant You know yourself, if you have someone to play with or share with or just spend a little time with, it brightens your day. So pleased J played a game with someone, hopefully they will "hit it off". That's how The Boy made his little friend at nursery - they started off just pulling each other around in a little tow truck. Then they started making a beeline for each other and sitting next to each other. Yesterday was The Boy's first day back at school & they both ran across the room and shared a hug!!!! So, you see, sharing a game with a ball could just be the start!

Another Picard here. I had a friend who was so madly in love with him that she had a life size carboard cut out of him next to her desk at work!!!

We have exactly the same monster (or maybe it's close cousin) sad I know, but I counted yesterday and I have 31 odd socks!

((((Carole)))) I don't know you & I am not massively regular to this site, but I just wanted to let you know that I think you are doing the very best that you can possibly do in a horrible situation. I think you're amazing. I hope this all resolves & works out well for you and yours.

septic (diff spelling I know, but that's what it brought to mind!)

This post reminds me of my younger years when I used to wear push up padded bra, belly firming knickers & thigh tightening tights under my "going out" clothes when we went round town. I often thought that if I pulled and got lucky the poor sucker would have such a shock when I disrobed Thing is, I don't know why I put all that stuff on cos I only had about an ounce of fat on me anyway!!!

Didn't see the prog, but I wished I had now! How bizarre it sounds. Wonder what those mum's boobs will be like in a few years - I only breastfed The Boy for a few months & I tell ya, they're nowhere near as perky as they were These kids that poop anywhere - are they eventually teaching them to use the loo, or is it that they'll continue as they are? Just have a thought now of going shopping one Saturday and somebody stopping, pulling down their keks and dropping one on the pavement, before carrying on to the next shop.............

ass

I really really really hope this all works out for you TN. What an awful time you've been through. <'> Take Care. Thinking of you and sending good wish vibes through the ether Can you feel 'em yet?

Had to laff at how this topic has progressed. It is marvellous this site, it's like having access to loads of conversations all going off at the same time on different interesting topics. Back to the original post, I'd never really noticed this until my sister commented. She said "I know you do have tough times with The Boy, but sometimes I wish my boys (both NT) would take a leaf out of his book." I looked at her in amazement, but then I watched............. The Boy asked for some crisps and a drink, then he took them to the table and sat down to eat and drink. Her boys helped themselves, then argued over who had what, then ran around eating & so spilt everywhere, then left half of what they'd got but went and got some more to open. The Boy put any rubbish in a bin. Her boys dropped it where they stood. There's loads of things I noticed, all along these lines. It's not that my nephews are naughty per se (they're only 3 and 6 yrs old) it's just that The Boy seemed more, well, organised and tidy somehow IYKWIM.

But don't you think that demonstrates how well you ARE bringing them up? They have respect for other people's property. IMO they could teach one or two people I know a thing or two.............

I've sort of lost track of where she is on the baby front, there's so many repeats showing I'm not sure if I am seeing a current one & she is pregnant again or if it's an old one & an earlier baby Try and keep your chin up chuck. We're all here & want to help if we can.

If he's anything like The Boy he will LOVE it! He likes the taxi drive too! I know that's no consolation right now, but it all works really well for us. Let us know how you get on mate.

You need to think about yourself right now & consider what YOU want. I have been through this. My first hubby had 3 - yes, count 'em - 3 affairs. The first one absolutely devastated me, the second was less of a shock & to be quite honest I was rather grateful for the third cos I really didn't want him any more. After the first affair he - obviously - came back to me. What happened tho was that I found myself trying to do everything he wanted & being the "perfect" wifey just to keep him. He showed no remorse whatsoever, even tried to make ME feel guilty and tried to make out it was all my fault - if I'd been everything he wanted he wouldn't have looked elsewhere. What you have to understand is that THIS IS NOT YOUR FAULT. For whatever reason there has been a breakdown in your marriage. Instead of talking it through your wife chose to seek counsel elsewhere. This led to her being closer to this man than she should have been & probably the "excitement" of all this felt wonderful to her. What she is considering now is this - is it just the excitement that has drawn her to this man, or is it genuine feelings? She needs to look at the relationship that you had together & decide if she had just let things slide. We all do it, we're settled with someone & that initial excitement grows into something (IMO) far more wonderful, but we forget that sometimes long relationships need work too. My big sis & hubby have just been thru similar (he wandered) and they are working it through & their marriage is stronger as a result. For me, break up was the right answer (and I now have a wonderful hubby & beautiful son & wouldn't change a thing.) Maybe getting back together is the right thing for both of you, maybe it isn't. This could just be a glitch, only you and Mrs TN can resolve this. You just need to take care of yourself though. Take any help and support that is offered. Remember this is not your fault & you need to act how feels right for you, be true to yourself, after all that's who Mrs TN fell in love with in the first place. If you want to PM me, please do so. I will help if I can or just listen if you need that.

To put this in a bit of context for you, The Boy is 4.5 years old. We have always been pretty free & easy about going to the loo. He wanders in and out & watches with interest. He now comes in and says "mummy's having a wee" or "mummy's having a pooh" (sorry to be so graphic, but wanted to demonstrate that he does appear to know the difference ) For four months now we have only changed his nappy in the toilet. Every time we do this we say "xxxx's had a wee" or "xxxxx's had a pooh". We also sit him on the loo as part of this routine & he washes his hands afterwards - all generating an understanding of the room for doing these things & the routine to follow for these things. He certainly knows when he wants a wee - if outside & starkers in the paddling pool he will step out of the pool and say "xxxx's is having a wee" before watering the garden. He also clearly knows when he wants a pooh, but I wont cover why here - suffice to say he has all the right "sensations" and understanding. However, he is not toilet trained & I doubt whether he will be this side of Christmas. He just has not yet put together all of the steps - I feel like I want a wee, I ask to go for a wee, I go to the toilet & take down my pants for a wee, I sit on the toilet etc. etc. etc. This is not uncommon with our kids. It's a case of perseverence and standard approach every time until they "get it". So, by all means, start to establish a routine but if this chap thinks it will have worked in one month, then he is bonkers. As for the cot. Why push it? If he's happy in the cot & you are happy with him in the cot then leave him. We only moved The Boy out of his cot when he started to attempt to climb out. We figured that was more dangerous than him having a bed & possibly falling out. I have to say, that since getting him a bed the night time disturbance is much greater - as soon as he wakes up he comes straight into our room, prob 4 or 5 times a week. At the end of the day this OT is making suggestions on what he has LEARNT. You are reviewing those suggestions on what you KNOW. If you like his suggestion use it, if you don't then don't, if you're not sure then trial it. You're not being unreasonable, you are saving your sanity. BTW if you want to use our toilet approach & results as an example for him then please feel free. If your lad is toilet trained within one month then I think he will be a genius!

stilettos

Cmuir, I know totally what you mean about your job. I too work full time & I would go crackers without this "break". People think I'm mad when I say I need my job, but it's my sanity. I do hope you can sort things out mate. And yes, it does get better & then worse & then better. Not much help really am I? But we're always here to listen.

It seems to me like it is the gentleman's wife that has the problem (the chap that Mrs N has been texting). She sounds quite jealous that she can't cope with her husband having a female friend.

The Boy is gorgeous, but that's cuz he looks like his dad & his dad is gorgeous. How lucky am I???

Speaking as someone who's partner was jealous, I can tell you that it is a hard thing to live with - both for the person who is jealous & the person they're jealous about. I really do sympathise on this one. It's not something I can truly understand - I've never been particularly jealous myself - but I do feel for you cos I know the hell he used to put himself through afterwards. He isn't like he used to be now, by a long chalk, not sure if that's 1) cos he is now more confident 2) cos we've been together so long that he now knows he has nothing to worry about or 3) cos I've got old & saggy so doesn't have to worry about folks looking any more I think your idea of having just cokes is a good one - feelings do tend to be emphasised when we've had a few. I hope you have a good night out mate.

Hope being at home for a while helps. Please keep coming here & posting, I really enjoy your sense of humour. And sorry, but your boss sounds like a (censored) to me, who clearly understands little & makes numerous erronous assumptions e.g. he assumes we're all autistic & thus "less able" on this site, because it's about autism! Then again, I understand bog all about your job & you sound clever to me so I guess in that respect I am less able than you , but why should people be "less able" cos they're autistic? Just different, not less. I'd still like to slap him. Hope you are feeling better today mate. ** I put the "censored" in brackets because what I wanted to say was too offensive to type.

Body Paint (OMG one track mind, think I need a babysitter for one night.............)

I think it's a real shame. A board should not be held responsible for the member's comments. They belong to that member alone. This could have really horrible potential knock on effects for boards like this, that are a real lifeline to so many of us.

I can't say I am totally surprised by your update. The Boy tends to be quite calm when he is with others - generally I think because he is so comfortable with us that he knows he can be himself, whereas with others he is on his guard and so retreats into himself a little and just plays with his toys on his own / occupies himself. Trouble is, we then have some fallout afterwards when he can relax when he is back with us. If your sis has been fooled into a false sense of security, take advantage I say & ask her to do it again! I suggest you recommend a certain on line delivery service for the shopping tho! Glad you had a good break.