Malika

Strange girl.... <'> However by the fact that you are not feeling able to work with people we people may miss something very important accepting this world diversity, this does not mean this nurse was right as she is very likely not to have "social deficit" Malika.

I did watch it and felt overwhelmed nearly cried in front of H just because of the "sharing the shame shadow" what an amazing "love story" truly amazing.............. and I like the bit at the conference when the father talk about the care the challenge and his son gift and then says "he is not for sale".... Malika.

Hi Kathryn, Balloons balloons both my children are so scared of them even my NT daughter, how not only to explain people but to make sure they understand once for all, I have no idea, and completly with you on this one. For sure this will create outrage and may be a court case but for our children there is no consideration of their disability. Take care. Malika.

Just notice this last bit that is not quite right don't people with AS or "HFA" do not deserve attention and get help or should they just be use to help others who are "more impaired" but when those have made progress what is going to happen then.... I understand what you mean now I would call it the "syndrome of mildness" Malika.

Hi Carole, You may be right but what now comes more and more apparent to me is that there are too many "experts" talk about ASD AS HFA but not enough action, don't take me wrong it is good to make talk and publication but I think sometimes it is better to keep it more practical and from a realistic point of view the fact that AS and HFA are similar 100% or not is just a way to refine a label while all ASD or AS people are different,and they need support and recognition to help them cope in this society. This is why I found your paper for the awarness conference much more essential and realistic, which is I think the right way to bring awarness to many people politicien or teachers. I just wish that all those talk by the "experts" as nice as they can be will help bring and find solutions for the one concern who have to cope with the every day challenge of having ASD or AS in this super functionning and communicative (but not necessarely civilised) society. I do like Tony Atwood but may be he should stop analysing so much now. If you see what I mean. How is Mattew by the way? Take care. Malika.

Hi Tyler-mum <'> Poor you as if the nurse story was not enough,really how do you teach people that changing the routine of our children should be done only when there is no other choice. I hope Tyler will be find tomorrow and poor you who will probably feel completly exhausted. <'> Try to relaxe when you get the chance take care. Malika.

Hi, <'> <'> <'> Please do not allow this to continue further tonight write a letter of complain and my advice is to send it to a governor and the head through registered mail this will show that you are taking the matter seriously, it may be that they all know that the caretaker is doing the bully but cannot do anything if nobody complains. I cannot beleive that a man who has no education training what so ever is allowed to operate in a school in such a way. I feel so sorry for you and your son who by now will be even more confuse how this caretaker can think he is teaching your child to listen to you by talking to you in this manner, in any case it is not in his job description for sure. I wish I could be of more help. Take care. <'> <'> Malika.

Hi Tyler-mum, <'> <'> <'> Do not forget that what ever you feel to do is right, as it was you who was there with your child, if you feel strongly that it was unacceptable not just a raised tone of voice but a yelling of anger then this is it go for a formal complain, you see the main purpose in asking for advice is to help you determin what you really feel like doing.... Let us know how things are going and don't worry Mummy knows best! Take care. <'> Malika.

Hi Daisy <'> <'> <'> To be fair I often try to hide my French connection but as soon as I speak even if my accent is not very strong (and with a bit of italien mixed) it is still there and then come the "Where do you come from" "Oh are you French?" without talking about my partner who keeps making fun of me but when my Mum comes and he tries to speak French then I got my revenge............. Take care. Malika. Going to send you a PM.

Hi Tyler-Mum <'> <'> <'> Would tend to agree with making an informal complain 1) because the nurse will be told that you were not happy with her shouting at your son. I think she needs to be told. 2)It is like a warning to her that next time come the strike as you took the time to call about the incident I suppose she will be smart enough to controle herself next time. You could eventualy ask the people involve to tell the nurse that next time you will make a formal complain but this time you just want her to reflect about her attitude, beside this road is easier for you, and you still take some action that the nurse will know about. Take care. Malika.

Hi, Tez is right, However I thought your friend son did not have any formal DX,except ADHD when he was younger, but even if he hasn't a letter to the school from the consultant saying suspected dyspraxia or/and ASD DX will follow, should be enough to make things moving which does not mean evidence build up should not continue. If the child has a DX of dyspraxia this should be enough to warrant some special help even before any DX of ASD. This is the link for the Dyspraxia foundation they could be contacted as well. Alternatively some copy of informations and advices could be given to the school. If the school has letter from the consultant and may be from NAS or the dyspraxia foundation I am quite sure they will start changing attitude. http://www.dyspraxiafoundation.org.uk/ http://www.dyspraxiafoundation.org.uk/serv...gu_teachers.php http://www.dyspraxiafoundation.org.uk/serv...u_secondary.php Hope this will help. Malika.

Found this as well. http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=255&a=3335 http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=131&a=2239 Malika.

Hi, This is what I have found on the NAS website however they don't say from who they accept referal, and I know they have a waiting list. http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=131&a=2239 Malika.

Hi, I can't help feeling upset about what you describe, This child needs urgent referal and DX is development seems so behind how could he not receive more attention? well I know how as he is quiet nobody could be bothered. Does he has a paediatrician can't he be refered to an hospital like Great Ormond street as they have a very good team for ASD and can do most of the test at the same place but to stand a chance he needs a paediatrician to refer him, I am affraid without a DX and a raccomendation letter from specialist the school is unlikly to listen. I think the mother should consider keeping him at home for a while this cannot be allowed to continue, the fact that this boys has injuries may even suggest that he is bullied but unable to express what is happening at school. What a mess ... I know that the NAS do make Dx but I think they need some form of referal calling them for advice would be a good idea. The fact that the statement has been refused is probably due to the lack of medical evidence... Sorry I cannot find anymore suggestion, hope this may help. All the best. Malika.

What about taking some ideas from this link of the NAS ???? <'> <'> <'> http://www.nas.org.uk/content/1/c4/43/96/P...20Worksheet.pdf Malika.

Hi Daisy, <'> I am going to clarify this for you I am French born in North-East France (Vosges) stay there until 18 then study and work and live near and in Paris for 9 years then went to Italy (Naples) for 5 years where I taught French and get a degree in Translation. I eventualy came to the UK to learn English as I couldn't learn very quickly I am still here after more than 17 years I actually lived in West London for the last 12 years. Well if you add up you will come to a respectable age call age of wisdom............... even if the teeth of the same name never dare to come I wonder why !!!! For anymore information you should apply to the MI 6 and 5 good luck! Malika.

Hi Stressedmumto, <'> <'> <'> Thinking of you about tomorrow. <'> <'> <'> Best of luck. Malika.

Hi Emma and MotherEve Same problem here if any thing I would like to fight for exclusion which is more appropriate for children on the spectrum.... but parents wishes never seems to be taken into account somehow. Good luck anyway but I thought you formulate another questionaire. Malika.

Thanks brook this is excellent. <'> Malika.

HI <'> Kathy Hoopmann has written as well "OF mice and aliens, an asperger adventure" it is not specificaly for children but may be you could find some ideas there or read it to your son. I am at the same point with mine where I am trying to explain a bit more about the differences between him and the others I have look for books but the one I found was more for adolescent, I will have to do some search about it if anything interesting comes up I will post it here. Take care. Malika.

Hi Carole, <'> <'> <'> I read your post last night and felt it so upseting, I hope MattHew is better now but it is so difficult for them already to adjust in a complete NT programe so when something like this happens it really destroy their confidence so much , I hope this was a one off thing, what is really upseting is that Matthew asked not to go with that boy why wasn't he listen to? This is what I found the worst bit I understand that some bully get away for sometimes because a leader would not realised what is going on but it is really worring that the leader did not even bother to keep an eye on Matthew after what he had told him...!!! I think yes you have to take some pictures and complain to the leader it could happen to any one there but of course bullies will always pick up on the vulnerable this is what makes it so upseting , Brook is right is Matthew has to stop doing something he likes because of this is just too unfair. I hope things can be sorted and Matthew will be abble to go back but I know from my son that once things have gone that far it is very difficult for them to get over it. All the best to all of you. <'> Malika.

Hi Tyler Mum <'> is that nurse is trained not only as auditory but as well as paediatric nurse she should have known better, Well I just talk to one of my friend who is a paediatric nurse and she thinks that it is not acceptable to yelled at any child in care even worst one who not only has SN but is as well only 6 years old. Now from there may be if you feel that her anger took her so much that she lost controle of herself it may be that you should complain in a way or another. My worry is that it may take a lot of your energy it is up to you really yes may be a note would be a good idea. I was thinking that it may be better to take action because it may stay with you and upset you for long time. All the best. Malika.

Hi to all, Phasmid, Helen get ready Stressmumto <'> , please by any mean stay strong and put your trust in who has you interest at heart...(the two people above for example ) do things in order and keep being focus on this process of complain it is this which eventualy will protect your son. You are lucky to have somebody near who knows what to do and can help you. Do not give up and take care. Malika.

Hi again, <'> <'> <'> Well it seems that the school has done a little bit but may not know how to deal with your son. Are yousure there are no issue of bullying or abuse within the school? It seems to me that since you have learned to apply some strategy he is better at home but transfered this to school, so the answer is to find out strategies who can work, this again seems to indicate some issue like AS or ASD. Have you look at some information about ODD (oposition defiant disorder) it often develope in children with ADHD because they are often misunderstood and badly treated where ever they are. if this is the case something has to be done fairly quickly as it may only get worst. Now I found this ling with some advice on school phobia which may help. http://www.handbag.com/family/sevenup/schoolphobia/ Take care. Malika

Do you really??!! just to show how they work closely with parents................ Malika.