Stella63

Well done Loobylou2!!! I do like to feel that I can help - inadvertently!! I've realised that it must have happened when I bought petrol at my local BP, the man said my card had been declined which I thought was odd at the time because I knew I had money in the account. I'm almost certain he took the card off me and then he put it in the terminal and must heve obtained the details. This garage has been accused of this in the past - I won't be using it ever again!! I will be writing to my bank to complain about their complacency with my account. stella xx [edited to comply with forum rules - Kathryn )

AAAAGGGHHHH!!!! Went on to my online banking yesterday and discovered that someone has cloned my debit card and run up �500 worth of transactions - all in one day!! Most of them are for online gambling. My wonderful bank, in their wisdom, didn't question all these dodgy dealings, they just increased my overdraft limit to allow them to go through!! Apparently they will reimburse me for these transactions and the fraud department will investigate how it happened but it will take a week to remove them and in the meantime I have no money!!!! Beans on toast for us!!! Stella xx

That's what happened to me!! My friend told me to read Atonement and then see the film so I read the book and thought it was beautifully written. As soon as I finished it, looked at the cinema times and, there it was gone!! I know it has now come out on DVD but I never seem to have time to sit down and watch a whole film. Did take OJ to see The Water Horse and that was a lovely story but never get to see 'grown up' films ( and I will qualify that by saying I don't mean the 'grown up' films that people buy in brown paper bags!!!!). Stella xxx

Hi Purplehaze, We have going through this for years with AJ. CAHMS got involved and were supposed to be doing CBT with him but the person would not do one to one with him because he 'didn't think that he had a problem' so there was no point. We have had years of him wrecking the house, being abusive to us and teachers at school, punching holes in the walls, smashing his possessions, ripping his clothes, biting himself etc etc. We started seeing a private psychiatrist who has now dxed ADHD without the hyperactive element and he has been put on Strattera - after 5 weeks on medication I can't believe the difference in him - more eye contact, more comfortable body language and apart from smashing up his ipod, no incidents with possessions. Once the medication is on an even keel hopefully CBT will be effective but at the moment I am taking one day at a time........!!!!! Stella xxx

Hi Elainem, My youngest was provided with an Alphasmart in year 3 because his handwriting was so poor. I think he used it in yr 4 as well but it then it disappeared!!! He was then assessed in yr6 by the SENICT (requested by SENCO) for a laptap and was provided one by County. When he started secondary school in september he was quite reliant on it at first but now his handwriting is hugely improving and he hardly uses it at all. Funnily enough my oldest son also had dreadful handwriting until he started secondary school - don't know whether there is a connection there? Stella xx

Hi Thought it was about time to give an update about AJ on Strattera and it was kind of freaky reading back through Smileys comments. Especially in the last week AJ has seemed so much more relaxed in his body language, he gives more eye contact and it is friendly rather than sullen or empty or angry, he is so much more communicative and will sit and talk. He has also managed a whole week of school, full time, without getting kicked out of a lesson!!! I am holding my breath and trying not to get too excited but it does seem to be making a difference. Saw the psychiatrist for an update (only a 20min session so less money - phew!) and he was really pleased with AJ's progress, says it will be another 2-3 weeks for the full effect. Heres hoping!!!! Stella xx

Well, got woken (too early) by OJ, very excited cos he had got me a purple fluffy card and chocs. AJ surfaced at lunchtime with card and plant (bought by DH)! I was then asked what I was making them for THEIR breakfast, spent the morning cleaning out THEIR rabbits and was then asked what i was making them for THEIR lunch!! Oh well, at least I have chocolate for later (had to hide it though!!) Stella xx

Hi Lizk, I've just written about this in my thesis. 'The NT brain receives all external stimuli and the subconscious part of the brain filters out the extraneous information, leaving an awareness of exactly what is needed. In the AS brain there are two possible scenarios; either the external stimuli goes straight to the conscious brain with no filtering which can lead to a complete overload and shut down, or the subconscious brain blocks as many as four out of five senses which results in that one sense being many times stronger. This leads to either hypersensitivity where the person is over sensitive to sensory stimulation, or hyposensitivity where they are under sensitive. The one major problem with understanding and dealing with this on a daily basis is that the filter process is inconsistent; it will depend on things like environment, physical and emotional state, stress levels and time.' It is such an interesting area and there is no formal way of assessing because each person is completely different and it can change all the time. I know with OJ he is generally hypersensitive to smell, taste and touch whereas with noise sometimes he covers his ears to hide the noise and other days he actively seeks to make it louder. Hope that makes sense Stella xx

Hi Kateball I had to refer OJ to the Community dentist as they understand the problems that our kids have. The first filling OJ had they gave him some laughing gas as he would not have coped with a needle at all! The second time she went through the whole process without drills, just talking him through and playing with him. He now loves going to the dentist - I think it is down to the dentist and their understanding of all the sensory issues and anxieties etc - not sure whether this helps or not but good luck!! Stella xx

Hi Clare, You just made me pull out the latest statement for OJ out of the drawer! As you may know Surrey got pulled up for their 'woolly statements' and they had to redo them all recently. OJ's latest one states that he has 19hrs per week for individual, paired or small group support to; support social interaction skills, support his capacity to manage his anxiety and support access to the curriculum. Hmmmm, still slightly woolly wouldn't you say!!!!??? However, it is working for him, apart from p.e. (which I am on the case!) and it is down to the the school how they resource it - maybe soon you can think about applying for a place at .......??? Stella xxx ps two full days for AJ and one bad comment in diary - not bad!!!

Hi Clare That is fantastic news!!!! You must be so relieved Speak to you soon (managed to get AJ to school full time today so me thinks a celebratory a bit later!!!) Stella xx

Hi hev, I have the same problem with my dh, he wants to get all the holes in the walls filled in redecorate to cover up all the scorch marks in the ceiling but I can't see the point. It doesn't solve the problem, just a waste of time, effort and money because AJ has no respect for property and will just carry on. I am hoping that now he is on Strattera his anger management will improve but its early days yet. Stella xx

Hi I totally agree with what Smiley says. OJ was diagnosed with Tourettes, Aspergers and OCD and they are definitely all inter related. his vocal and motor tics are uncontrollable and then there are the urges to do something, like touching someones hair, which could be Tourettes but more likely OCD but having said that all of these things can also be wrapped into the Aspergers dx - it is a very complicated area and we have accepted that all the dx's are part of the Spectrum and part of OJ - that's who he is!! Sorry, a bit muddled I know!! Stella xx

hi, I am just so shocked by the news. she did a couple of seminars for my postgrad cert in Aspergers in November and was so inspiring. She talked at length about her school and home life and how she wished she had been dxed before she became an adult and how important it is that we tell our children so they can learn how to live in the NT world. I am very saddened and hope she is at peace with herself now. Stella xx

Hi Mumble, I am currently doing a postgraduate cert in Aspergers and one of the best books i have used for sensory perceptual issues is 'Sensory Perceptual Issues in Autism and Asperger syndrome' by Olga Bogdashina ISBN 1-84310-166-1 There is some very succinct info about scotopic sensitivity/Irlen syndrome and it is well worth reading. Hope that helps. stella xx

Hi Well I had to add my own experience of this! OJ detests socks, takes ages to get the sock just right and then when the shoe goes on, it can take half an hour to get positioning right!! He would live in flip flops if he could - gets home from school and either one or both socks are removed immediately. Interestingly, my father who I now know is AS but undx'd because he is 76 and really is not interested but it now makes sense to me why he has always been such a weird father, since my mum died he has stopped wearing socks - he says they always hurt his feet and why does he need them? He stomps around in his open toed sandals all year, doesn't feel the cold so why bother!! I have now got used to it and from what I have learned about sensory processing issues, it is actually quite a normal thing! It's other peoples' interpretation of what they see that can cause the problem and now I just don't give a monkeys!!! Stella xx

Hi Karen, At the school where I work (secondary) for all yr7 and yr8 pupils the SENCO sends out a form to all form tutors, teachers, Houses etc to see if any children get flagged up for social skills issues. She then arranges a series of sessions for these kids and sometimes they are not on the SEN register - it could be bullying or peer group worries but it gets looked at and appropriate support may be given if necessary - sometimes its a way of finding out problems with kids who have come from private prep schools because the school are under no obligation to provide information about their needs. And we get some nightmare problems there!!! Stella xx

Hi Hev, We have had the same with AJ. He was very honest when he first tried it - came home from his friends house saying guess what i did today!! I actually always thought he would smoke as he has put things in his mouth since he was a baby and they say that smoking is a substitute for the breast!! Also, both me and my dh smoke so it is very difficult to come down hard when its something we do (and there is no way I could give up with my stress levels up where they are!!). But we have adopted a hard aproach - no smoking in the house and he has to find the money for it - we only smoke rolling tobacco which we buy in Belgium very cheap - he and his 'mates' want to smoke the really expensive cigarettes so its up to them to support the habit. Our problem is that he is now open about smoking cannabis when he can and although we have smoked in the past, there are huge dangers with the strong skunk that seems to be taking over and the possibility of mental health issues especially when he is already dx'd with various things. I don't know what th answer is but I was smoking much younger than him and I feel guilty constantly lecturing him about it. A very tired and defeated (at the moment) stella xx

Hi Found it!!! www.autismtoolkit.com Sorry, can't do those auto thingys - you enter the site and download the pupil transition bit. Good luck!!! Stella xx

Hi We used the toolkit for OJ when he was at the end of year 6, recommended by the outreach worker. It is lovely and so easy to put together. oJ went for a day at secondary school in summer term of year 6, took his camera and was able to take pics of differnt buildings, teachers to build up a visual map in the booklet. You can download it (not the teachers one but I can't remember the address) its about 25 pages but well worth it. Stella xx

hi Karen is right with her definition. It also now falls under the sensory processing issues within AS as proprioception. quite often dyspraxia is dx'd before other things because it is relatively easy to spot at an early age. Stella xx

Hi Clare, Totally agree with whats been said. we had the same last thursday, the case worker from social services was coming to our house to meet the boys and me for the first time and she cancelled. What really p'd me off was that I had got AJ in school that day and brought him and OJ home early to see her - they were both justifiably annoyed! Stella xx ps that open day we discussed is tomorrow but only for those who have already applied for places.

Hi Brook, I think we just clicked lucky with OJ. He was put on Prozac for his anxiety almost 18mths ago and he has been absolutely fine on it. I have noticed if he doesn't take it for a few days that the worries become bigger, his volume control goes up and he verbalises every thought in his head. The anxiety hasn't gone away but I do believe it has helped keep him calmer and seeing how well he has coped with the transition to secondary school tells me it was the right decision to put him on it. Having said that each child is different and their physiological make up will determine which medication is right for them. Good luck and let us know how you get on. Stella xx

Hi same with OJ i'm afraid - there were loads of very upset boys there today, including my OJ. I do know that once he has got over the disappointment he will be proud of himself for actually having a go. First thing this morning he was adamant he wouldn't do it but he coped with the 5hr wait brilliantly and interacted with several other boys there. Oh well, watch this space because something will come up for him!!! Stella xx

Hi jsmum, I really sympathise with you. OJ had a complete breakdown in yr 5, he then got his dx's but could not cope with being in a classroom, around other children, and we had to devise a timetable of tiny steps. We started by him going in for lessons he liked, maybe just for an hour, and mostly he would sit outside the classroom, we then progressed to a desk in the room with a screen around it that he could control. It was built up from there, two lessons, no break or lunch, just tiny steps all the time. It was a complete nightmare for all of us, luckily at the time my dh was working from home so could accomodate all the journeys sometimes several times a day! When he went into yr6 he was managing most lessons (by then he had his statement so had a lot more 1-1 support) apart from pe, assembly, music. Since he has started secondary I have been amazed at the change - he is so keen to go to school and apart from pe he is really enjoying himself. i also know another AS child who was in his class has also turned things around at secondary school (different school). Trouble is they are all so different in what worries them but I am convinced the key is the little steps with rewards and keep building on it1 I now have the same problem with my 15 yr old school refusing (for different reasons!) and so the battles carry on. He has managed about 5hrs at school this week and the trouble is now the pressure is on (GCSE coursework etc) and he knows it and that makes it more difficult for him the further behind he gets. Sorry, a bit rambly but keep fighting and if he manages a little bit, praise, reward and keep going. Stella xx