hev Report post Posted May 18, 2008 well steve phoned the ex in laws and they told the ex and he gave steven a very quick ring to say yes i will give permission,didnt ask how he was or nothing,steven is very upset,i think he was hoping for maybe contact with his dad. i did tell steve he didnt need permission but i think he was really thinking the ex might be interested,after the call he put his arms round my dad and burst out crying,i had feeling this would happen,steven going bk to school today,ive phoned the school to tell em sitchuation but i feel so angry towards the ex and so upset for steve Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bagpuss Report post Posted May 18, 2008 Oh Hev, I'm so, so sorry For Steve <'> <'> <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ScienceGeek Report post Posted May 18, 2008 Sends lots of hugs for Steve. <'> >< <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bard Report post Posted May 18, 2008 Hev, the children I've known who have chosen to take a different name have used it as a way of moving on and redefining themselves. When I read your first posts about it, I hoped that that was what Steve was doing, new start and new school and seeing that many choices are his to make and under his control. It's always hard and painful to grow up, especially for those who haven't been loved by a birth parent as they should, He will come to realise that you and Katie and Nick are his true family, and those that love him come what may, and despite the fact that he sometimes lets you down. You won't give up on him, ever. So a new name is a good thing, and he will come to terms with his father's response because he has you lot to fill the void. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kathryn Report post Posted May 18, 2008 This is tough for Steve and for you. <'> to you both. K x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oxgirl Report post Posted May 18, 2008 Sorry that Steve has been upset like this, hev. <'> ~ Mel ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bid Report post Posted May 18, 2008 It's the ex's loss, hun Hugs for you all <'> <'> Bidx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Enid Report post Posted May 18, 2008 Well what an absolute bleep bleep, for any grown up let alone a parent to be so uncaring is beyond words, Steve will move on from this as he has you and your family to love and support him, as you say he may have been hoping for a reunion but now he sees what his birth father is really like it might help him to move on. wishing you all well and lots of <'> <'> <'> Enid Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Clare63 Report post Posted May 18, 2008 Hev & Steve <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> Clare x x x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
warrenpenalver Report post Posted May 19, 2008 its very sad but at least he now knows the situation <'> >< <'> >< <'> >< Hopefully he can learn to accept it, albiet a bit dissapointed rather than hoping for something thats not likely to happen!! Have you talked to the ex? might be worth making it clear to the ex that what he says has deep impact and he needs to MEAN it when he says he dont want contact and not screw with steves mind later on. I had this with my dad who wanted nothing to do with me even when my mummy died and now suddenly hes got back in contact and wants a relationship suddenly because he is dying of CJD/BSE/mad cow disease. Obviously he wants to settle his guilt before his death! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Frangipani Report post Posted May 19, 2008 (edited) Hev <'> Steve <'> <'> Edited May 19, 2008 by Frangipani Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Flora Report post Posted May 19, 2008 hev and steve <'> It was very brave of him to make the call. Flora XXXXX Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mossgrove Report post Posted May 19, 2008 <'> <'> <'> Simon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pearl Report post Posted May 19, 2008 Couldn't have put it better than Bard. <'> for you both xx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Suze Report post Posted May 19, 2008 <'> hugs for you both, hope it does,nt upset Steve too much , best wishes suzex Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JsMum Report post Posted May 19, 2008 HUGS AND TLC I have tried very hard to type a few supporting words but Im struggling so sending you some hugs, I cant understand why his father wont let him go with your surname, if he wants nothing to do with Steve, surely there must be some law like in america, could he divorce his dad or something similiar Ive seen. JsMum Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
soraya Report post Posted May 19, 2008 Poor Steve, how can some people be so insensitive including the grandparents, sending lots of <'> <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites