JsMum Report post Posted January 28, 2008 I am wrapping up for the night, and just logging off when it came to me that I have really got a lot of support lately from this forum and I just wanted the forum team/members know just what a difference it is to have a great support network, I truly dont think I would of made it without you guys, its a great place and supportive people, so a heart felt thankyou and cyber hug to show you I am very greatful. JsMum Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bard Report post Posted January 28, 2008 You give as much as you get, lots of people have been given advice and support from you. What goes around comes around, I'd say. <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Frangipani Report post Posted January 28, 2008 <'> <'> <'> I agree - Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ScienceGeek Report post Posted January 28, 2008 I too am really grateful for this forum and the members on here It has been rather hard lately and everyone has been so wonderful and supportive <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pearl Report post Posted January 28, 2008 Awwww .... group hug! I'd be lost without this place too. <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kathryn Report post Posted January 28, 2008 We all need <'> <'> <'> at one time or another, especially when life is K x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
witsend Report post Posted January 28, 2008 Now I don't want to go all Gwyneth Paltrow at the Oscars here but............I have to say this forum has been my lifeline (my rock! ) for so long now, I can always say stuff on here I can't say to anyone else because you all understand! Whenever I have good news or bad I feel compelled to share it all with you lot!! And even when I'm not posting I log on to find to find out what's happening in your lives . Right I'm welling up - 'nuff said..... Luv Witsend. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Frangipani Report post Posted January 28, 2008 Now I don't want to go all Gwyneth Paltrow at the Oscars here but............I have to say this forum has been my lifeline (my rock! ) for so long now, I can always say stuff on here I can't say to anyone else because you all understand! Whenever I have good news or bad I feel compelled to share it all with you lot!! And even when I'm not posting I log on to find to find out what's happening in your lives . Right I'm welling up - 'nuff said..... Luv Witsend. <'> <'> <'> <'> Stop that 'you' <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bard Report post Posted January 29, 2008 Now where's Baddad with a raspberry and an inappropriate joke when you need him? I never cry when I'm happy, too much grinning going on. Although I'm always up for a group hug. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KarenT Report post Posted January 29, 2008 I think quite a few of us realised how much we depend on this forum when it was down for most of the day a few days ago. Gawd, it was like having an arm chopped off! I'm not among the most frequent posters but read most days, and it's my first port of call if I need advice or just a laugh. Thanks guys, you're the best! Karen x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ASue67 Report post Posted January 29, 2008 I echo everything that has been said - I don't post that often but I come on here every day and get support from others from reading and checking out advice (if that makes sense!!!?) Group <'> <'> xxxxx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bagpuss Report post Posted January 29, 2008 JsMum <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mumble Report post Posted January 29, 2008 Ditto. I'd be lost without this place too. Yeah - what would you do all day? Terrorise poor innocent students with your librarian sshhhh & stare no doubt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
annie Report post Posted January 29, 2008 When I first joined, I soon found out that I wasn't on my own anymore, people understood how I felt and members were going through the same 'stuff' as me. Telling friends some of the things that were happening to us was ok (school/LEA stuff), but people here really understood and helped point me in the right direction for getting my son support. Thanks All! Annie xx <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Karen A Report post Posted January 29, 2008 The Forum has been a gret support for me in the last couple of years.A great bunch of people who are a big support in hard times but don't take life too seriously all the time either.Thanks all. <'> <'> Karen. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lynyona Report post Posted January 29, 2008 <'> <'> <'> totally agree with you all <'> <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
loobylou2 Report post Posted January 29, 2008 <'> I agree. Thanks everyone! <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Clare63 Report post Posted January 29, 2008 (edited) <'> <'> <'> <'> I could not agree more, well not without going all gushy and over the top Clare x x x Edited January 29, 2008 by Clare63 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
forbsay Report post Posted January 29, 2008 I agree as well Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dooday24 Report post Posted January 29, 2008 thanks everyone, a lifeline dosnt come close dont know wat id do without all yr advice and laughter would go crazy, well crazier than i am allready lol def want to be in the group hug thanks everyone lots of love donnaxxxxxxxxxx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
elun1 Report post Posted January 29, 2008 <'> Would be lost without this forum Elun xxx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hev Report post Posted January 29, 2008 def want to be in the group hug thanks everyone im only in the group hug if baddads in it Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Canopus Report post Posted January 31, 2008 There would be more adults with AS if the moderators weren't so paranoid about certain things. I know several adults with AS who read this forum almost every day but don't post articles because they think the moderators are politically correct control freaks. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bid Report post Posted January 31, 2008 (edited) There would be more adults with AS if the moderators weren't so paranoid about certain things. I know several adults with AS who read this forum almost every day but don't post articles because they think the moderators are politically correct control freaks. Well, Canopus, I'm an adult with AS and all I can say is that if this site was anything like the other 'Aspie' sites I've looked at I wouldn't be here! The level of personal abuse and downright offensive posts that are allowed on other sites is scary I don't agree with a fair bit on here, but that's because I'm an adult with AS, and have a grown up son so my perspective is sometimes different from the NT(?) parents with little kids. I feel that I can post my opinions, but I do try to be polite about it! As for the Mods (and speaking as an ex-Mod)...the amount of time and energy that goes into doing a completely voluntary job, which invariably offends someone, is enormous The current Mods do a great job, I think, although of course they have to make judgement calls which sometimes might not be perfect. And the solution is simple...people are all free to find a forum better suited to their interests or tastes Bid Edited January 31, 2008 by bid Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Flora Report post Posted January 31, 2008 There would be more adults with AS if the moderators weren't so paranoid about certain things. I know several adults with AS who read this forum almost every day but don't post articles because they think the moderators are politically correct control freaks. I don't understand how they can think that. This forum is probably one of the most tolerant of it's kind. How can the mods be described as control freaks? Perhaps it's because they don't allow flaming or abuse... and quite right too! However, they do recognise when and how things become inflamed and that's where the tolerance comes in. Having been sometimes a vociferous member I've experienced this tolerance first hand. Canopus, perhaps your friends prefer a forum where too much freedom of speech allows some members to be bullied an annihalated; if that's not the case then what is their problem? because apart from not allowing that to happen this forum is very open and tolerant to all sorts of opinions and views. Flora Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mumble Report post Posted January 31, 2008 There would be more adults with AS if the moderators weren't so paranoid about certain things. I know several adults with AS who read this forum almost every day but don't post articles because they think the moderators are politically correct control freaks. That's why it's good that different forums exist. They can go to the other forums and have a winge about how bad the world is and how no one cares about AS adults and blah blah blah. Me, I want to get on with living my life, and this forum allows me to do that - it shares in the triumps and supports me through the more difficult times. I don't even visit the other forums now, particularly the main AS one, because I find myself getting angry and wanting to shout and throw stuff, a bit like when you see these agony talk shows, Trisha's and Jeremy whatsit and such like, on telly!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pearl Report post Posted January 31, 2008 I've been looking for another forum so JP can post privately & independently from me, & I've yet to find one I'd be happy to recommend to him. Not saying they are not out there, just I havent found one. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tally Report post Posted January 31, 2008 I'm sorry your friends feel that way Canopus. I personally don't feel that way myself, as a person with AS, nor as a moderator. It is never possible to please everybody, and we do recognise that this forum does not suit everybody. There are Asperger/autism forums that I would feel too uncomfortable to post at. Obviously, not everyone feels that way, because many people do enjoy posting at those forums. We often discuss articles or television programmes, and that is perfectly acceptable within the forum guidelines. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Canopus Report post Posted January 31, 2008 How can the mods be described as control freaks? Perhaps it's because they don't allow flaming or abuse... and quite right too! However, they do recognise when and how things become inflamed and that's where the tolerance comes in. These aren't my words and I personally think it is a big overstatement. However, I think the mods do have a liking of trying to create a squeaky clean forum where things which could be seen as controversial or frowned upon by polite society are wiped. I'm not sure if the webhosting company has changed since I last checked, but I found it distressing that a UK webhosting company was used for this forum. I could explain in detail why (and why I refuse point blank to set up a discussion forum for anybody else with a UK or European web hosting company) because it might make the mods more relaxed. I'm sorry your friends feel that way Canopus. I personally don't feel that way myself, as a person with AS, nor as a moderator. It is never possible to please everybody, and we do recognise that this forum does not suit everybody. There are Asperger/autism forums that I would feel too uncomfortable to post at. Obviously, not everyone feels that way, because many people do enjoy posting at those forums. One friend with AS used the term "AS overlords" to describe people who hold power over people with AS. Examples of these "AS overlords" include parents, AS support group leaders, and forum moderators. He told me how quite a lot of "AS overlords" hold certain viewpoints and beliefs that are out of line with the viewpoints and beliefs of many adults with AS. This friend has been quite badly treated by the moderators of two forums who threw him off, and has been made a persona-non-grata by the organisers of a local AS support group, after they found out about his association with a certain controversial organisation. We often discuss articles or television programmes, and that is perfectly acceptable within the forum guidelines. Where an article is located or who produced it matters to the mods because if it's by the "wrong people" then they will sever the link to it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Lya of the Nox Report post Posted January 31, 2008 ooooooooh what a load of ***** we are a mixed bunch and have differing views and someone somewhere has to make sure we dont offend, and get sued! i have respect for the mods, and the nt, and asd peeps here including my own daughter, who writes some obscure stuff, and has never been changed or moderated Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Karen A Report post Posted January 31, 2008 (edited) Canopus.The moderators only edit posts in line with Forum rules which those who decide to post on the Forum agree to follow by joining.In my experience the few posts that are edited are edited not because they are controversial. One friend with AS used the term "AS overlords" to describe people who hold power over people with AS. Examples of these "AS overlords" include parents, AS support group leaders, and forum moderators. He told me how quite a lot of "AS overlords" hold certain viewpoints and beliefs that are out of line with the viewpoints and beliefs of many adults with AS. This friend has been quite badly treated by the moderators of two forums who threw him off, and has been made a persona-non-grata by the organisers of a local AS support group, after they found out about his association with a certain controversial organisation. It is sad that your friend has such a negative view of individuals who may actualy be attempting to be supportive.I certainly do not consider myself to be an overlord.I actually became a Moderator for no other reason than that I was keen to support Forum users. I believe that individual views and beliefs come about partly as a result of individual experience.I would not expect to understand completely the way individuals with AS view the world as I probably do not have AS.In exactly the same way I do not expect people who have not had my life experiences to have the same views and beliefs as me.All I can say is that I have come across a lot of people in my life.The people on the Forum whether moderators or Forum members are amongst the most inclusive I have had contact with.Karen. Edited January 31, 2008 by Karen A spelling correction. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
baddad Report post Posted January 31, 2008 Hi canopus/all - I really like that 'AS Overlords'! It's a great cop out - any time someone stops him from saying what he wants on any subject in any company he can claim it is an act of oppression! I have a term for that too, it's called 'get out of jail free card' Another similar 'trump card' is the one that says 'any autistic person who disagrees with me is an "Uncle Tom" who has been indoctrinated by the AS Overloads into repressing their real nature and feelings'. Of course, there are NT versions too, ('well of course you can't see my point of view, because you have autism') that we'd leap on with equal vigour! Basically, rather than offering reasoned argument to support a point of view a 'trump card' is played to negate (gainsay) the opposing opinion out of hand, regardless of any merits to the underlying proposition... --- Yes, we DO like to keep a clean (I wouldn't say squeaky clean, but definitely cleanish|) board, purely and simply because we want it to appeal to and be appropriate for the widest number of users. If we think that something is likely to be offensive to significant numbers of our members - or maybe even EXTREMELY offensive to a smallish number (i.e. politics, race, religion etc) we moderate accordingly. Some will consider that 'nannying', others (the majority here, I hope) see it as a necessary and reasonable precaution (except when it is them being moderated! - You know who you are, no names no pack drill etc!) Some actually don't think we go far enough, and certainly despite our best efforts there are occassional slanging matches that get out of hand and cause Huooooge offense left right and centre We do try very hard to accommodate all views on autism, but try hard to ensure that no particular angle or imperative comes to the fore. We are not a lobby group for any opinion on autism. Finally, I think I'm on failry safe ground in saying that every member of the mod/admin team is 100% in favour of freedom of speech. Having said that, there are places where it is approriate to empower that freedom, and environments where it is appropriate out of consideration for others to moderate that freedom. The 'balance', will differ hugely depending on the individual and the environment, but hopefully there's enough common ground for everyone to have their say and still accommodate the sensibilities of the majority. L&P BD Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Canopus Report post Posted January 31, 2008 It is sad that your friend has such a negative view of individuals who may actualy be attempting to be supportive. It isn't my friend at fault. It is people who are initially helpful towards him, but when they find out about my friend's association with a particular organisation they tell him to sod off and call him all sorts of nasty names. I really like that 'AS Overlords'! It's a great cop out - any time someone stops him from saying what he wants on any subject in any company he can claim it is an act of oppression! I have a term for that too, it's called 'get out of jail free card' I think you have misunderstood. There is no cop out and no get out of jail free card involved at all. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Karen A Report post Posted January 31, 2008 It isn't my friend at fault. It is people who are initially helpful towards him, but when they find out about my friend's association with a particular organisation they tell him to sod off and call him all sorts of nasty names. I do not feel in a position to pass further comment.It is not appropriate to talk about the issue further when it is with regard to another Forum,a friend and an unknown organisation.The fact that Moderators on the ASD Forum moderate posts that are offensive does I hope prevent nasty name calling here.Karen. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pearl Report post Posted January 31, 2008 I think we should also be inclusive towards Morris Dancers Sorry - I'll get me coat. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Karen A Report post Posted January 31, 2008 I think we should also be inclusive towards Morris Dancers Sorry - I'll get me coat. I saw that thread yesterday....knew there would be somone on the Forum that would be put out. Started by a Mod too. Karen. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pearl Report post Posted January 31, 2008 I wonder if theres a Morris Dancers forum? And is there infighting between the traditionalists & those who want to go all urban? Sorry I'm dragging this off topic, tis a talent of mine Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kathryn Report post Posted January 31, 2008 I wonder if theres a Morris Dancers forum? Wonder no more. K x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Karen A Report post Posted January 31, 2008 Wonder no more. K x Kathryn you do realise they will be all excited now.....thinking there has been a huge number of people looking their Forum up...a sudden revival. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hev Report post Posted January 31, 2008 kathryn my secret is out,thats the other forum i belong to my username is maypole and im most active in the pub thread- (there really is a pub thread!!) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
